Now that Rara has found her true self again, she really does have everything she could've ever wanted. But there is still one thing beyond her reach, a desire made unobtainable by her career. Love is hard enough when your every move isn't being scrutinized by the public, and knowing that her special somepony would receive the same judgment was enough keep her away from it. That is, until Rarity comes knocking at her door, and distancing herself from anypony romantically proves to be more difficult than she thought.
Written for the Equestria Daily March 2016 Friend Off, but I missed the deadline so....here it is anyway! I just adore this piece of art by luminaura and I've been dying to do something with it ever since I saw it, so this story is based on it.
I'm loving this story so far and I can't wait to see more!
7093593
Yay! I'm so glad! I'll get the next chapter out as soon as I can! I think I finally decided which direction I want this story to take and I certainly hope I don't disappoint!
Nice start, waiting for more.
7095006
Thanks! Working on the new chapter now
Great chapter! Can't wait for the next one!
Hey! I had a chance to read this first chapter tonight. First of all, I want to say that your writing is very clear with no typos that I saw. It's very very clean writing which is just peachy keen! So one of the things I saw a lot of was telling how the characters felt, what had happened, etc. The first whole six paragraphs rehash what already happened in the episode and that just isn't as an exciting of a beginning as you could have. That being said, the emotions behind the events are important gems that we don't entirely see in the episode. Those are what is more interesting here. My advice with this is to try and make more things active. Have Rara doing something while she is thinking perhaps and shorten the introduction section to the bare essentials and then build it up carefully from there, as an exercise. Also along this vein, the writing directly tells us what Rara and Rarity are feeling, but we don't see that in their manner other than their blushing and adoring eyes. Are they shifting in their seats? Is there a tension between them? (I do actually see the tension but it could be much more felt rather than told.) Try to build this up so the reader really feels the drama and romance beginning. (Romance is hard to write, so it takes a lot of practice!) Next, you write dialogue very well, especially for Rarity. Instead of letting the story unfold through you, the author, directly telling us stuff, try to use dialogue to help the story more forward. One picky thing: a capella doesn't have a comma in it. Finally, there are a few times when you name drop the characters' names in the descriptions and dialogues. It's clever, but I personally found it distracting from the narrative.
I hope this was helpful!
7102404
Yep, very! Thanks, I'll PM you instead of commenting since I don't know how long my reply will be.
7101858
Thanks!
7093631
Well, that is wonderful! I'll be looking forward to that!
7095006
7101858
7109383
Hey guys, just wanted to let everyone know that this story will be on hiatus for a little bit. I'm so thrilled that you guys are looking forward to another chapter and I really hate to make you wait, but I can't really say when the next chapter will be out. I want to work on some other writing projects outside of MLP and to get a little more writing practice in before I dive into this story so that it can as good as you guys deserve
Anyway, just thought I'd tell you in case you didn't see my blog post.
Very interesting ship, and a promising start. I'd say the mutual attraction might be a bit too early, but after reading the author's note, it makes sense that the story is self-contained. With the Hiatus tag, I am not sure if the story is supposed to end here, or if you plan to continue when you rewrite it, as you said.
It was a good read, and as a fellow fan of best pony I'll be looking forward to the rewrite.
7237218
Or you could be talking about Rara, to which I also agree!
Thanks! I do plan on writing more, a lot more actually, just not for a while. I have a feeling this story is going to be pretty lengthy and I'm not really feeling up to the challenge at the moment. I'm glad you enjoyed it and it's great to find a fellow Rarity fan! Unfortunately they seem pretty few and far between, so it's always nice to find someone who knows who the true best pony is!
7240226 Rara is great and all, but let's face it. Nothing can compare to the greatness of fashion pony. Whether in a social situation or while fighting a dangerous creature, Rarity will do it while looking fabulous.
And her being overdramatic is just the best thing on the show, in my opinion.
Edit: Sorry for doublepost, had some internet trouble with the site.
7242240
So true! I never get tired of Rarity's melodrama, I think it's adorable that she's kind of unaware of how over-the-top she can be sometimes. And let's not forget her ability to see the beauty in everyone and her desire to make garments that allow ponies to see that beauty for themselves. I'm trying to get caught up on all my episodes and I just finished Saddle Row & Rec, and I have to say, I'm so proud of how far she's come. She's has boutiques in three different places now, including two of her favorite cities, and she deserves every ounce of the happiness that it's brought her.
7244890 And in the end, the success is her own. She never had to rely on royalty to give her a boost or something. Her friends helped her, of course, but she really did her best and it payed off.
I love that she is such a strong and well-rounded character. She has flaws, but she works on them. And she has good points. My god, so many good points. Some you can see, and some she usually keeps to herself. She'd be totally able to run up to some monster, kick it right in the face and knock it right out, then turn around and
whinecomplain about chipping a hoof.I mean, the mane six in general are great characters, but Rarity is just the best.
Not to mention her voice actress does an amazing job.
7245302
There's no doubt that Rarity is a flawed a character, but so are all the mane six for that matter, Rainbow Dash especially. She's never been my favorite but I'm willing to overlook her flaws and see her positive traits, which, for some reason, a lot of people don't seem to do with Rarity. They can't all be perfect, otherwise we'd just have a bunch of boring, flat characters with no depth or complexity. She can be vain and greedy, definitely, but she's also compassionate and generous, along with a million other things. Plus anyone who puts everything thing they have into a creative outlet for all the world to see can relate to her. I read this interview that the almighty Kkat did (I'm a huge fan of Fallout Equestria) and he basically summed up the main reason why I love Rarity and have felt a connection with her since the beginning. I can't believe that the author of the most legendary story in MLP history is one of the few people who can appreciate her like us. I'm meeting Tabitha tomorrow at Midwest Brony Fest and I've never been more excited/nervous in my life. It's been my dream for four years and it's probably the first dream that I've ever had come true! Sorry for the rant
7249215 Yeah, exactly. Flaws make well-rounded characters. And they are real flaws, not mary-sue-flaws. That's what's so great about the mane six. They are all well-rounded, and they are strong female characters, all in different ways. We have way too few strong female characters in shows.
And yeah. Rarity is an artist, and yet, she is the good kind of artist. The type who really wants to give the world something, and who is not in it just for the money. She just loves making fabulous dresses, and she loves helping others feel beautiful.
But getting to meet Tabitha... wow, that's pretty cool! I hope you manage to get an autograph!