Riding in a HMMWV

Beaming Ray realizes that she is young, scared, and lost. What she doesn't realize is that monsters aren't always what they seem.

Written just because I wanted to.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 4 )

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The Dark Bro

The Dark Bro #1 · Oct 19th, 2016 · 1 · ·

And so another beast is added to the everfree.

Cascadejackal

Cascadejackal #2 · Oct 19th, 2016 · · ·

There's not really anything really wrong with this fic, but it doesn't have much in the way of substance and it does tend to be more tell than show. That Random tag fits it pretty well, honestly.
There's a dimension jumping humvee, there's a filly who doesn't do much except panic and be described as "generally happy", and there's some humans of such little interest and personality they're almost non-entities.

The dimension jumping humvee idea's interesting, if under-developed, so it's worth a quick read for that at least.

M48 Patton

M48 Patton #3 · Oct 20th, 2016 · · ·

7654013 Thanks for the feedback, the story was rushed so I might go back and rework it a bit, and I will definitely try to expand upon characters in any future stories.

Edguy0009