Twilight, a young alicorn at Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns, is interrupted in her studying by a fellow student who wants to know about some things that changed when she ascended. Before she knows it, she's telling her new acquaintance the tale of how she fell in love with magic, how her brother and the other Element Bearers helped her to rise up . . .
. . . and how she fell to dark magic and nearly destroyed them.
Loosely based on an old blog post by RealityCheck.
Prereaders: MyHobby, Kai Creech, Pureheart 352
Chapters (1)
I love this story!
8652929
Thanks, I'm actually working on another story set in this world. I hope you enjoy that one too.
8653111
Then i will pentiently wait
It's here! I like it a lot!
I love the way Twilight sees the magic of Celestia and certain other characters in the story. The whole mage sight aspect of her tickles my little grey cells something fierce.
And the format for applied footnotes in fimfic lives on! I love seeing these things in action.
This is a nice introduction to the world, and It's clear you're setting up for something special. I hope to see you see this through to fruition!
Now to ponder just what kind of creature keeps an Ursa Minor as a pet...
8653854
It's not really for Ursas in particular, but if you don't specify which bear you're calling for it will bring one with a mass proportional to the amount of magic put in. Put in a spark of magic, get a small teddy. Put in a lot for the average unicorn, get a full grown polar bear. Put in a lot of magic for Twilight Sparkle while she's boosted with dark magic . . .
Is there only going to be 1 chapter?
8655559
In this story, yes, but I'm already working on a full length story set in this same world. I technically already have the first chapter ready, I'm just waiting until I finish chapter 2 to publish it.
Interesting. Twilight being an alicorn but not an Element is something I've never seen before. I like the way you separate out dark magic in Twilight's thoughts.
8657472 The "not a Bearer" thing won't stay that way for long. I'm glad you liked it.
How do we use footnotes on this website? It seems useful.
8658023
I got the technique from MyHobby. Basically, you use Right Insert to insert the note just above the paragraph where the footnote appears. Here's the example he gave me:
(right_insert)(1): Wings of gossamer and morning dew came at a premium price and with several release forms.(/right_insert)
The Great and Poweful Trixie did not know a cloudwalking spell. All the mages on the outskirts of town charged bits, and when she tried to raise bits in her own special, specific manner, they had accused her of soliciting. After she demanded to know just what they were implying with that, they reported her. Simply for throwing a show without a permit on the outskirts of one of the biggest city-states in Equestria. Just outside the property where the mages waited to cast cloudwalking spells on visitors (1).
It should look like this after you replace the parentheses with square brackets:
(1): Wings of gossamer and morning dew came at a premium price and with several release forms.
The Great and Poweful Trixie did not know a cloudwalking spell. All the mages on the outskirts of town charged bits, and when she tried to raise bits in her own special, specific manner, they had accused her of soliciting. After she demanded to know just what they were implying with that, they reported her. Simply for throwing a show without a permit on the outskirts of one of the biggest city-states in Equestria. Just outside the property where the mages waited to cast cloudwalking spells on visitors (1).
Fascinating alternate universe. I appreciate the little touches like Rachette as a Bearer of Magic (and the implication that Celestia actually thought to retain the Elements over the centuries,) the Juniper noodle incident, and Nightmare Night rituals apparently shielding foals from her wrath. The erratic, frenetic voice of filly Midnight was especially nice. Thank you for a fascinating read. Any hope of more in this setting?
9781339
Well, I actually do have the first chapter of the main story ready, the entire outline, and part of chapter 2 . . .
You know what, I'll go ahead and upload chapter 1 right now and then do some more work on chapter 2.
This was actually pretty good, I think the name is what couldn't attract enough people XD.
It was awesome story
Wonderful story! Wish I had read it on the computer instead of my phone though, the side bars didn't appear on mobile. Can't wait to check out the next story. Wish I didn't have work
This was an interesting set up for an AU. In your notes you explained things pretty well. I like the nod to marvel and Abbet and Costello.
I hope this isn't a dead story, because it had so many fun plot hooks that you could use.
Keep up the good work and remember "Have Fun With It."