Everypony knows Spikes not so secret crush on Rarity. However it seems Spike has a secret that he's been keeping from everypony, but secrets are a funny thing, they always have away of getting out.
Note:
Just a heads up, this is my first time writting. So its gonna be bad, so expect some if not alot of mistakes. I dont mind if people want to leave feedback or anything like that. just try to be understanding, its all i ask
Big thanks to HAKDurbin for all the help, put in a lot of work to make this a better read for you all. Go checkout his stories
Also I would like to thank Victoria the dragoness for all the support she's given me as I try to write this story. If you havn't already. go check her stories out, they're great reads.
It's "Rue the Day" dear.
good so far
foals so soon?
well duh... It's been eight years
And I still do nothing for my little ponies
or your dragon ward... son... adopted creature
DRACONIES!
Found one:
"Alot": Proper noun. 1) A town in the country of India. an error. 1) common misspelling of "a lot".
"allot": v. 1) to give out, to apportion, to divide, or to distribute. (Other forms of the verb are "allots", "allotted", and "allotting".)
"a lot": pronoun. 1) a large number or amount; a great deal. adv. 1) a great deal; much. n. 1) a particular group, collection, or set of people or things. 2) an article or set of articles for sale at an auction. v. 1) divide (items) into lots for sale at an auction.
sorry, just couldn't resist
9539608
Thanks, I'm not great with spelling or grammer, so it all helps :) will make that change now
Thanks for reading
9539613
Yeah, I'm bad with this sort of stuff lol but will ask my editor to have a look over it at some point, thanks for the read though. It all helps in the end
9539655
Well, pretty good so far with regards to the story and grammar. Just a few minor mistakes stood out in the second chapter, and nothing caught my eye from the first chapter.
The foreshadowing of menace in the first chapter certainly has my attention. Looking forward towards more.
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9539689
Thanks I've had this Idea for awhile, I'm hoping it turns out good lol
fret ? to worry?
fretten ?
threat ? to imply harm?
threaten?
you like?
what do you think?
that was a nice long hug in "Twilights Seven"
way too long
like your time with Zepher?
9584562
Thanks for the post, always nice to have comments I'll have to have a look into that when I get time lol either way I hope you are enjoying the story
9585224
Chapter 6 now out, wanted to release this for my bday, hope you all like.
Just wanted to thank HAKDurbin again for all the work his put in, now caught up on everything I had before his help, so from now on chapters may take a little bit longer to get out as I'm still writting them(Im not fast lol) so thanks for your understanding.
9668291
No it's not alternate universe, at least thats not my intent, It's just bad writting on my part hahahaha
"you know what happened next. I got my Cutie Mark and finished the designs" was ment to show that she didn't finish her dresses till after she got her mark, from seeing the gems from the slab of rock after seeing RD's rainboom, like you said, I just didn't write that cuz in the series Spike knows that she got her CM after seeing the gems inside the slab of rock after the rainboom. Which is why I went with "then of course you know what happened next. I got my Cutie Mark and finished the designs"
Sorry about that and thank you for the comment, it's always nice to have people leave comments. I hope you are enjoying the story so far though
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I'm hoping to have the next chapter out soon, I'm interested to see what people think of the overall idea I had, when it's complete.
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Hey JensenDaniels32,
The more I thought about it, the more I thought I should add in about Rainbows rainboom lol so made the change to " I saw Rainbow's rainboom, finished the designs and got my Cutie Mark" as I was re-reading it, I realised that she got her mark after she finished the dresses, not before. So thank you for pointing it out in the first place Hopefully it will makse sence and will help other readers too.
9585665
I made those changes you pointed out, ty. hopfully it's better now lol chapter 7 should be out soon :) the good news is overall the story is now finished it's just in the editing stage, so with luck, shouldn't be to long await, thanks again for reading and taking the time to leave a comment always like to read your stuff myself
Well, she's not wrong
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9730689
🤣🤣🤣 I know right, hope you're enjoying it so far and thanks for the comment
9730837
Well I'm really glad you like it so far heres hoping you like whats to come
What creature is their father?
9785902
Good question thanks for reading my story so far & commenting, hope you like it & chapter 8 has almost been finished edited, so shouldnt be to long for it to come out
9786206
Ooh nice, good luck on chapter 8
Thank you for the reply, I assume the answer may be in future chapters.
9786288
Time will tell lol
HE'S MINE!
woof!
He's buff
wowzer
Rarity tone it down...
Me likey
me too
here comes the foals
9798802
hope you liked the story so far & as always thanks for the comment
Wow. I was not expecting that!
That was a great twist.
Keep up the good work, this story is going places.
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hahaha thanks, glad you liked it hope you see why I couldn't answer ya question about "What creature is their father?" now & hope you liked the answer lol I'm also guessing you didn't see it coming then lol. As always thanks for the comment and chapter 9 should be out very soon
9804290
Nice.
9804493
Hey chapter 9 is now out, hope you like it
Loved it. Wish it would get a sequel, some short story’s about some antics and things that happen. Would also love to see cadences and shining armors reaction to learning about spike and who he is.
9805793
Well I hoped you liked my first story, if I can ask did you think the overall idea was ok? not sure if i'm gonna write anymore to be honest, although I have a few ideas, its alot harder to write them than I thought it was gonna be if it wasn't for HAKDurbin editing this I don't think I would of ever got it done, my spelling and grammer are really bad, so poor HAKDurbin had a lot of work & I mean A LOT! lol & Victoria the dragoness gave me alot of support/encouragement, which really helped
but you never know, I've had an idea for a one shot story I wanted to get out for last mothers day but didn't want to have more than 1 story at a time lol so I may well do that at some point
I'm a big sparity fan myself & always liked the idea of Spike and rarity lol
9805929
Thank you so much I did have an idea to maybe give like an epilogue chapter a week or so after this where cadences and shining armor would find out & also had discord in it, but I wont say much more than that just in case I do get around to writting it some day lol I have sort of left it open for a sequel, but also could just leave it as is, sorry best answer I can give at the moment to be honest
can I ask, did you work out Spikes secret before it was revealed, I tried to drop little hints here & there lol its ok if you didn't I'm just asking cuz I wanted to see if it was a good surprise or not hahaha
9805950
Thank you very much, It means alot to know people actually liked to read the ideas I have, as for writting more I guess only time will tell but you never know right
9805981
yeah I may of peaked at that episode lol
9805965
Cant wait to see the chapter. Would love to see a sequel, there is so much that could be done, rarity and spikes wedding, they all get together and spike tells story’s about his children, bounding with spike and garble, you can even do thing with the cutie map. List goes on and on. The big revel on who spike was I did not see coming. I called Grogar, and the dream sequences. But spike being the father caught me by surprise, half called the elements of harmony part, but was surprised with Starswirl. Good surprise
i have really enjoyed this story, and am surprised to hear it is your first, i really am, and i wanted to make sure you knew that i liked every part of it, i hope to see more of your work later on. from beginning to end it has managed to keep me captivated and is one that'll stick close to me. i'm glad to have been able to read this and wish you luck for anything else you do.
Good story, I really enjoyed it.
9806216
Yeah I know what ya mean, rarity and spikes wedding, & having them all get together so spike could tell story’s about his children, where some of the things I was thinking about. I just don't know how to go about writting it lol but hey who knows if theres anyone out there that wants to work together on some little stories that take place after this, pm me & we'll see what happens(or even if someone wants to make a sequel themselves from this just let me know, I'm sure we could come up with something) The bounding with spike and garble, and cutie map are also some good ideas thanks Thanks again for reading my story & taking the time to leave a comments
9806230
Well I'm glad you liked it and yep first story ever lol It helped reading alot of stories on this site, gave me lots of ideas to write this as for more stories Like ive said before got some ideas, its just writting them hahaha I'm not very fast at writing and my spelling and grammer are really, really bad to be honest lol so if i do it could take me awhile. I'd also have to see if HAKDurbin would edit for me or find someone else if his busy/doesn't wanna
But you never know right Thanks again for reading my story & commenting
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Thank you for taking the time to read it & leaving comments & glad you enjoyed it
9806892
Yeah ive read it, its in my favs lol along with a lot of Sparity stories lol
I've got an idea for an extra chap for this story its just writting it atm lol so if i write it, i could see what happens after
9807054
You did good
you did Rarity
nice story
Indeed many nice touches ....and snuggles
He's too young to be a great great great great great grand pa
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glad ya liked it
9809293
not bad ideas, I like how ya think. but I don't know about a sequel just yet or even if I will ever get around to writting one. guess we're all gonna have to wait & see lol
9809362
see what you mean now when you said "versions of Spike and Rarity 20 years later in the last episode." interesting idea to say the least
for all those that are wondering, I have wrote a follow up for this story. I'm just waiting for my editor to look at it, so please look forward to it
Huh?