This story is a sequel to My Little Mages: Academia Ardens
With Celestia's and Luna's sudden announcement to Twilight and her friends that they intend to retire and pass on the mantel to Twilight.
Meanwhile a long forgotten enemy, one written off as mere legend, Grogar summoned Tirek, Cozy, Chrysalis, and King Sombra to himself. His plan, for them to work together to take over Mystica. However, King Sombra has other plans.
What is King Sombra planning?
Will Twilight and her friends find out and stop King Sombra's plans?
Or will the king live long?
A My Little Mage retelling of Begining of the End
Real subtle, Foxhelm.
Yes, thank you, Spike.
So, you're not rewriting your first story?
They only had 45 minutes. I doubt the show could have gone into this much detail with the dialogue even if the writers wanted to.
Umm, did the premiere have too many plot holes for your taste, Foxhelm? I mean, I liked the premiere as it is, but (thinking music) I guess it was a little too elementary to fit in this universe. Also, you sure do work fast. Lastly, you figured out a way to redo Rollercoaster of Friendship? Using Chrysalis? I can't tell if I'm impressed or apprehensive.
Not too bad a start. Also, have you heard the theory that Discord was one of Grogar's creations? I thought of it at one point while taking a closer look at the old goat, and Dr Wolf even made a video about it!
REALLY good job on the start of this story. REALLY enjoyed the details not only concerning all the help they had in the past (particularly Spike pointing out the behind the scenes help as well as the frontline help), but ALSO Sombra being JUST Genre Savvy enough to point out the REASON Major villain team-ups usually don't work AND detailing what Grogar did to the last individual to use his name.
So, yeah, REALLY good job on the exchanges, characterizations and future chapter set-up in all the right places.
9570646
I saw Dr. Wolf's video. I buy Grogar making the other monsters, but to make a being that can warp Reality itself... Tirek only seemed able to absorb the raw power or Discord and not the talent. And I kind of hope they don't go the route of Discord is somehow Grogar's son after a fashion.
Hey foxhelm does sombra not know that twilight in his what how many granddaughter or is going to find out cuz I would love to see that happen
9571767
Wait and see,
9570593
People don't give the Princesses et al enough credit.
I considered it, but after some thought, I realized that this wasn't like with Somnambula, it wasn't just a simple name change, it would have been an extensive rewrite with no real payoff to the change.
Fair point, but you have to admit, the critic has a point.
Actually if anything it's under par with the plotholes, it's something that a place that I thought I could flush out and give Sombra some much-needed characterization.
I can't say much as it's still in the development phase
Okay, the way you wrote Sombra's execution of his real plan felt more obviously trap-ish than what we got in the actual premiere. Just saying.
9573537
That was the plan, the girls should have known that something was wrong when the Crystal Heart did nothing to him when they activated it in the show proper, here... well I like the idea of Sombra often being the smartest man in the room, Twilight did fall for all his traps back in Season 3 after all.
I wonder did anyone get the titular reference... or was it too on the nose
9574087
I honestly missed it the first time, but I had other things on my mind.
Overkill much?! I really liked that tree.
Hold on. Doesn't his ties to Twilight as a sentinel give him some resistance against brainwashing or at least a way to break out of it? At least, that's how I remember it working in the Siren story.
To quote Han Solo, "I've got a bad feeling about this." I mean, I know how this ends from the actual episode, but knowing you, you're probably going to find someway to make Sombra make the Mane 6 bleed a little before they win.
9578424
I liked the tree too, but Sombra is so evil
Actually it took Sunset to burn Adagio's influence out of Flash,
9578455
You told me that it was his love for Twilight that helped him break free.
9578469
But he needed someone to knock some sense into him first, which was Sunset trying to burn the influence out him first
9578789
9578789
I don't get the reference but still funny
Wait. What? You do realize that if Sombra doesn't get brought back for the finale, you're going to have to either kill or redeem him on your own, right?
So, Sombra had no idea that the spear was fake, or did he have another plan to deal with Discord?
9578866
I am aware that if the show does nothing, I have to. But since I already adapted the Nightmare Rarity arch of the comics, I can adapt other archs. As for the spear, as much as I like to make him the smartest man in the room, Celestia, Luna and Discord ain't stupid either and we've all seen what happened the last time Discord sides with another villain, also Sombra made a big deal about doing this all on his own, and while Discord is a troll, it would weaken the point of Twilight's own speech to Sombra, he fought for and by himself, she fought for and along others, no matter what he could do, in the long run she would win because Friendship Is Magic.... roll credits
So, Twilight's reaction to her boyfriend getting brainwashed is disbelief, regret, and annoyance? Has Flash gotten injured, hexed, brainwashed, and incapacitated so often that Twilight's gotten used to it?
9579105
No. Twilight is in disbelief that Sombra could in fact brainwash Flash, she's annoyed that Sombra did in fact brainwash Flash and she's regretful for using as much force as she did to cast her Hold spell on Flash.
9579127
Ah.
All I can say is, VERY good job on the exchanges, characterizations, action, added info, general story wrap-up and future story set-up in all the right places. I particularly liked how Sombra thought to take care of the Rainbow power box AND actually had SOME semi-good reason to think he stood a chance against Discord, as well as Twilight's pointing out while Sombra IS powerful enough AND smart enough to pose a threat by himself, he WAS by himself while she and her friends were fighting for EVERYONE. Of course, to be fair, major villains (usually correctly) don't trust others easily (I say "usually correctly" because most of the time, major villains that team up usually ARE looking to betray each other at the first real opportunity. Indeed, villain team ups work best when everybody except the mastermind is either a dumb muscle type who is strong enough to be useful but JUST stupid enough to follow orders without question or a mercenary willing to do any job as long as they get paid well enough.
9579175
I thought that Sombra had good reasoning on how to eliminate Discord and that he could.
9578866
Not the AJ emoji I expected
If that really is the Shadow King, himself, still alive, then I really hope he acts as a rival to Grogar in the bid to conquer Equestria. If only because I enjoyed this version of Sombra throughout. Also, would it be wrong imagining David Kaye voicing him?
9592445
In what role that David Kaye performed? Because I only know him as the Beast Wars Megatron and Unicron Trilogy Megatron.
Oh, he's played alot of roles through the years. Hell, he even played Optimus Prime, himself, for Transformers Animated, along with Lugnut, Grimlock, Cliffjumper, and one other who is an autobot tank.....but whose name escapes me for now. He even played Prof. Charles Xavier, and Apocalypse in X-Men Evolution. But why ask me for specifics when you can watch this, and see what most of his roles were?:D Right here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BzSoDD75rqY
9594434
Okay can I get specifics now?
...........you know what? Nevermind. All I meant before was that David Kaye was who I was imagining as Sombra's voice in this. That's all, nothing more. Sorry for causing a hassle over this without meaning to.
9594870
Maybe I should I told you I watched it. But thanks for the specific. I can hear it, but I was thinking more like give Sombra's Season 9 dialogue to his Season 3 vioce
Oh, good. *sighs in relief* Thanks for clearing it up, because I was afraid I might have made things worse than they actually were.^^; Well, that's alright. You imagine whoever you'd like voicing him, and i'll say go for it. To each their own, I always say, and I respect that. But thanks for sharing who you picked.:)
9574087
Funny. The original title was The War Of The Ring, as Tolkien felt that this one was too revealing.
It's a little less focused than the episode it was based on, but I guess that's what you were going for.
9717490
Care to share your idea?
Well, this happened. Gosh, I wonder how sad the season finale is going to be.
9808805
I don't know how to take that. .... *remembers that I watched English subbed versions of the German (language) dub version of the series last four episodes when the subs became available*.... nope still don't know how to take it.
9808822
This episode showed me that these three had potential for good. It'd be so sad if they decided to throw it away. They're totally allowed to if that's what they want, but it'd still be sad, and they'd still have to live with the consequences of their choices however terrible.
9808869
Well if we recall from Hearth's Warming Eve, Hurricane, Platinum and Puddinghead could have stopped fighting and work together but they despised each other to the point they were blind to the wendigo freezing them
Reading this once again, to my enjoyment.:) And I still hold my hopes that something big will happen involving Sombra in the future. With certain circumstances I won't mention here, I think there's potential for a bit of mild AU, if not something else at least.
9825876
Thoughts on the bonus chapters thus far?
9825917
Very nice ways to build up to the remainder of the chapter/season. Makes me curious if it'll be exactly the same, or if it might gain mild differences during the finale.:)
She's what now? Okay, I'm not even going to ask how any of that is even possible.
Okay, I know this was supposed to be the transition episode to Twilight's rise in leadership, but I'm honestly a little off-put by how unnaturally calm she was when things started going south, both in this chapter and the actual episode. I mean, I would have been satisfied if you had given her maybe half a second to scream out her frustration. Maybe my nitpick might be a bit of self-projection on my part. I mean, I'm still learning how to stay calm under pressure also, and I honestly would have gotten frustrated for even just a little bit before getting down to brass tacks.
Oh, almost forgot. I assume that Fluttercord got canonized in the last few episodes?
9834979
Well other than, 'It's Pinkie Pie, don't question it,' a better answer is that Pinkie strives to throw the perfect party for whoever she's throwing a party for, and the attendants, which involve understanding them on a psychological level, knowing what to serve and what activities can be at the party and how to maximize the fun and minimize the possible injuries and to help heal, and not all parties are for humans and not all guests are, hence being a vet.
As for the rest, it's a fair critique, but I look at it like weight loss, you don't notice losing one pound on a given day from another, but you will notice losing 20 pounds at the end of a month.
9834992
I will not spoil anything
I like how Discordsaid he wouldnt do anything Discordy, yet he teleported everyone right next to the villains so they could ovehear the exposition and make plans that would reduce and limit the amount of damage they would have to cause for their distractions.
I beleive past Discord was angry because Future Discord had Starwirls Epell Time traveled back to tell him it would be thousands of years before anyone would even try to be his freind.
Especially given what Discord did with Sombra.
As for the Medallion being a Remote Control, Id have thought its not for the Sun and Moon directly, but for the Canterhorn Mountain powered Artifact Orrery?
Pinkie also has Geologist, Mechanic, Engineer etc?
9835503
Um, he teleported before he read the card
The medallion isn't a remote control, it's a conduit of Celestia's power over the sun and Luna's power over the moon and allows Twilight access to those powers so that she could move the sun and moon.
As for the rest? Huh? I don't understand what you mean.
We now know That this is Discord and not the real Grogar. What are you going to do with That skull? Are you going to say That Discord made it or is he now a killer?
9976344
Let's just say Discord is a squarely chaotic neutral character and leave it at that