Bound By The Law
"Alright," Mayor Mare said to herself, looking down at the papers in front of her. "The court is now observing Twilight Sparkle vs The Bronycon Bookstore."
The mare blinked. Her ornate powdered wig tilted ever so slightly on her head. She looked up from her podium at the front of the courtroom to see Twilight Sparkle walk down the center of the courtroom aisle and preside at the prosecution table. Her expression was stern, focused. She levitated a briefcase onto the table. Two loud clicks, and the case sprung open, releasing several organized stacks of paper, a few books, and her dragon assistant, Spike.
"Will the defendant be joining us today?" Mayor Mare asked.
"Defendants, your honor," Twilight Sparkle corrected. "As we understand, this bookstore is a collective of vigilante propagandists, your honor."
"Then who will be presenting for the defense?"
"We will, your honor."
Two stallions rise from their seats. One wearing a rather oversized snorkeling helmet and scuba suit and the other looking nearly exactly like Rainbow Dash. Except, instead of Rainbow's signature rainbow lightning bolt for a cutie mark, the number 47 was drawn in what seemed to be crude crayon.
Mayor Mare blinked at the two stallions and set down her papers.
"Who in the world are you two?"
"Our names aren't terribly important, your honor. But we do represent Earth's Bronycon Bookstore. We're here to speak for the Bronies."
"Bronies? This again?" she sighed while rubbing her temples. "Twilight, we went over this, this is covered under fair use."
"I understand your honor. We're not here to persue copyright infringement. We accuse the defendant of multiple accounts of defamation of the Elements of Harmony, The Princesses, as well as many of the residents of Ponyville. Their likenesses and names were used without permission, and depict the characters in actions they otherwise would never do."
"Excuse me?" Mayor Mare said in surprise. She leaned back in her chair and looked two the stallions. "What is all of this?"
"It's true, but I assure you that all of the stories depicted in the novels of the Bronycon Bookstore are purely works of fiction, and are not intended to be considered non-fiction within the pony universe."
"We object, your honor. These stories may claim to be written as fiction, but they use so many details and information from our world that they seem entirely plausible within our world. Therefore, with the books' information having blurred the lines between our reality and fiction, it stands to gravely impact the reputation of the ponies who are depicted within the books."
"Okay, well what sort of contents are do the books depict?"
"We assure you, while there may be an occasional romance, every story being sold within our business has been hand picked, verified, and contains nothing that should be exclusive to readers over the age of eightteen."
"I'm glad you brought this up," Twilight said. "If I may, your honor. I have submitted each of the sixty different books being sold at this business into evidence."
"Oh, I saw," Mayor Mare said. "Princess Sparkle, do you honestly think I would have read sixty different books with only a weeks notice?"
Twilight raised a hoof. Then slowly brought it back down.
"Well I would have," she said softly. "But that's not the point. It's the contents that are important. Look at exhibit DUBS: Where Rainbow Dash enters a sensual relationship with a kitchen sink. Or how about exhibit MONO: Which contains a eerily realistic tale between Rarity and Princess Celestia herself."
"Not to interrupt, your honor, but most of these stories are going to have some sort of romantic inclinations, but the world has been no stranger to gossip columns or parody. Surely you can understand."
"How about the multiple stories that contain romantic relations with the humans themselves, or Bronies."
"While we cannot account for what every author writes," The Rainbow imposter interjected. "I can assure that many of these stories have been vetted first hand not just the authors themselves, but in some cases a private publishing group.
"Your honor," Twilight interrupted one more time. "May I show Exhibit FLUT, which contains a nearly five-thousand word vignette detailing how I would kill myself and why it would make sense."
The courtroom went silent.
Mayor Mare took a deep breath and looked to the defense.
"Why would you allow these books to be sold? Why are you promoting this platform that could harm the lives of innocent ponies across Equestria."
The two stallions looked to each other.
"Well, let's start with we didn't think you were real? This has been a really weird day for us."
Mayor Mare sighed and leaned forward.
"Humans in Equestria aside, why would you write about us? What have we ponies ever done to you?"
The rainbow stallion stepped forward.
"I can't speak on behalf of all of our kind. But I can certainly share this from my personal experiences. Our world is dark. Harsh. Terrifying at times. With what we know of your world, it provides us a gentle reprieve from the struggles of our routines and day to day problems. By making two ponies hold hooves, ponies that we recognize and can relate to, it helps us breathe so that we can approach each day with the power to do what you all do every day. To spread love. To spread friendship. To show the virtues of Kindness, Generosity, Loyalty, Honesty and Laughter to a world that's lost it's magic."
A hum filled the courtroom as the stallion turned to the Princess of Friendship, she chose not to look him in the eye, but her ears were perked.
"We would never want to harm any of you ponies. You have all been better friends to us than a lot of people who live in our world. And now with the connection between our worlds closing quicker and quicker, we want something we can hold onto. To show how much you all mean to us. Surely you of all ponies, Twilight, can know the power a book can have to help people and ponies alike."
Twilight nodded and lookked through her papers. Then, she abruptly tossed them in the air.
"But why do the stories have to have me kissing so many different ponies?!" Twilight exclaimed.
Rainbow 47 looked around at the court room.
"Okay, raise a hoof if you'd totally bang Twilight if you could."
A short silence came over the courtroom as a few hooves shyly went up. Then another. And another. Then another group of hooves.
Soon, every hoof in the courtroom was up and waving. Twilight turned to Spike, who even raised a claw.
"Spike!" she growled at him.
"What?! I have no frame of reference... or standards," Spike mumbled.
"Well, then I think that settles it," Mayor Mare said with a smile. "Since everypony wants a happy ending with Twilight, I don't see any reason why Bronies can't have theirs. Besides, I for one am honored that ponies would go out of their way to write gripping romantic narratives about me."
"Well actually, you're not really that-" the snorkel stallion began. The rainbow stallion swiftly kicked him in the hoof.
"I declare the Bronycon Bookstore officially open for business!" Mayore Mare rules, banging her gavel down. "May your shipping be forever free!"
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Flutterpriest · 1.7k words · 143 12 · 2.4k views
- Flutterpriest · 1k words · 127 4 · 2.6k views
- Mica · 1.5k words · 95 1 · 1.7k views
- Flutterpriest · 1.8k words · 73 3 · 2.2k views
- Flutterpriest · 1.1k words · 122 7 · 2k views
- Flutterpriest · 2.3k words · 52 5 · 1.3k views
- Undome Tinwe · 2.5k words · 43 29 · 528 views
- FerociousCreation · 14k words · 25 1 · 792 views
Stats
Page generated in 0.171 seconds
Total duration
862 users online
1,102,897 hits today, 2,237,019 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
Oh my god you actually did it
i.imgur.com/bHNnf.png
Lol pjre goofiness
This is good. Odd but good
NB4 Feature Box
That went from funny to sweet to funny. I enjoyed.
This was fun!
Not even three paragraphs in, and I'm already laughing like a maniac. She had him in the briefcase! Jesus!
Spike a shid. But also.
Wut.
So Spike's cheating on Rarity already!
She should totally gut him alive for it and turn his scaly hide into a belt, a purse, and a pair of shoes!
…
And that fic probably already exists somewhere around here.
case closed... that was funny
30 Likes and 2 Dislikes
No Views
Hmmmmmm . . . YouTube is drunk again?
Except, you know, not free free. Printing isn't.
Also, no one tell her we have to call it the Golden Oak Bookstore because we're not officially affiliated with the con.
Hilarious yet touching work, Priest. Thank you for it.
9725914
I mean, we wood tell her, but it still Burns a bit for Twilight
9725903
The view counter is not a live count, it updates every so often.
I feel the need to upvote this before even reading it. Maybe for solidarity. Or something.
I'll figure out how to react properly after reading.
9725933
It was a joke but I guess now I know something new about this site.
There's a store now?
Fair use Twilight. Suck it up Sparkle.
The most surprising thing about this fic is the Spike abuse at the beginning.
God damn man. This is brilliant. Especially Spike's parts in it.
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/190/373/131942790061.jpg
Forever free!
What was Spike doing in there?
This was a spectacular read.
This hits home...
9726312 He's property. And useful to Twilight's case.
"As we understand, this bookstore is a collective of vigilante propagandists, your honor."
Oooo, I have a title for my nametag now. Thank you!
The ships shall last forever!
9726474
Fair enough.
That can mean two wonderful things. Well done!
I understand this is supposed to be a self-referential, humorous quickie, but it's still clumsy to be missing so many question marks at the end of queries.
Yeah... they made sweeping remarks about the romance stories, but got completely off the hook for the "It's good for Twilight to commit suicide" book. Oh. And no mention of the gore-fics, and other really nasty fics out there that flow out of the fandom that have ponies in horrid situations. "So we could have happiness and friendship to hold onto because our world doesn't have any..". They wouldn't be able to use that line of bull for those stories. There's so many stories... hundreds... where that explanation just doesn't fly.
Ha! Take that Equestrian legal system!
Love is real!
9726852
With respect, this is about the stories specifically in the BronyCon Bookstore, which I assure includes nothing gory, or really anything worse than a slightly spicy romance or somewhat off-color comedy.
Heh, cute
This vigilante propagandist approves of this
I haven’t even read this yet but I’m already triggered.
Good thing I haven't finished the author's notes for one of my books. I can live with vigilante propagandist, writing unauthorized sequels...
This was brilliant.
You know, I kinda hoped there wouldn't be a pun at the end.
How wrong I was.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Once again, I feel guilty for partaking in clopfics. Glad they didn't have to touch upon them here.
That is an unfair question!
...
*slowly raises hand*
9725844
It was a Type 20 TARDIS, commonly sold in Hogwarts...
9725844
The Man Mare with the Golden Gun
You bite your tongue. Mayor Mare is wonderful.
Great read either way.
If I was in that courtroom... I'd be obligated to raise my hand (hoof?).
Twilight, while you might be creeped out by the various stories (and believe me, there are way worse out there), that's all because you're a wonderful mare who has the power to grip the hearts of a lot of people.
Is it, though? Or is it just that Hasbro understands that taking legal action probably wouldn't be worth it, both monetarily and in terms of the ill will it would engender within one of their fan groups?
Vigilante propagandist... eh. I've been called worse.
Fun read, dude.
Well, at least she didn't find out about fimfiction. If that ever happens, there will be Tartarus to pay.
It’s beautiful
Goddamnit, I knew this would be a feghoot.
9726052
I'm not fully up to date on it, but from what I recall someone had the idea to set up a bookstore consisting of many of the physically published works in the fandom at Bronycon 2019 not long after it was announced to be the last Bronycon. Good to know they gathered enough steam to actually have one.
9725914
(Announcer voice) Buy yours now, with free shipping!*
*Shippingandhandlingisnotactuallyfree.We'retalkingaboutshippingponies.We'renotresponsibleforanyconfusion.
It's okay Twilight. I had to pull my submission because I never finished it. I am a lazy writer.