Daniel, a disciplined member of the secret service, is stuck with one of those jobs. You know, the one where he has to watch over some secondary personnel when his buddies are hitting it big protecting alien royalty itself, especially when one of his is jealous of her friend and keeps pouting about it. Regardless, he occupies the annoying Rainbow Dash as best he can. Well, until a yellow silicon mask falls from the ceiling and the flight takes a turn for the worse.
And when the pilots pass out, someone’s gotta fly the plane.
Finally, a new entry into the 24-hour fics shelf. It’s not a true 24-hour fic again, but it’s close enough for me to include it among the list.
Rated T for a decent amount of profanity.
Proofread by LordJanitor, shalrath, and TheManFromAnotherTime.
Dash is in good company with Tex Johnson, who slow-rolled a 707 prototype in front of a group of various airline executives to show them what Boeing could do. When asked by his boss what he thought he was doing, Tex responded "Selling airplanes."
(If you ever want to shock a commercial pilot out of a sound sleep, get out of arm's reach and repeat "Terrain. Terrain. Pull. Up." in a flat monotone.)
10723567
I actually stumbled across that during my research for this story. It’s almost disappointing they don’t do that much anymore. Most modern planes can handle a lot more than they’ll ever experience in normal use.
At the same time, they really aren’t built for that. Still, I wouldn’t mind experiencing some tricks like that some time.
Well, on the criticism side, I think the tagline and description didn't do a great job on selling the story.
Other than that? Wonderful! I really enjoyed this and thanks very much for writing it. The research definitely showed, and I'm a real sucker for ponies-on-Earth.
Bravo!
10723602
I can tweak that real quick.
Very entertaining. Well done on the research angle too as it matches everything I know about flying. I think this was really good for a 24 hour fic. Bravo.
Not what I expected from the description but I liked this better :>
And today in Mayday Air Crash Investigations Rainbow Dash saves the day.......
But really some of those captains are real heroes.
10723744
Most certainly. During my research, I came across events like the Miracle on the Hudson and the Miracle at Heathrow and honestly, some of those stories are really powerful. It's those split second decisions and good judgment that really make the difference between miracle and disaster.
Of course you should trust a flier on how to fly.
Good story!
I enjoyed reading it.
I once wrote a pegasus flies an airplane after the pilots are incapacitated, and this is way better.
Methinks you came across Helios Airways Flight 522 in your research.
Dunno if you came across Fed-Ex Flight 705, but you can roll a DC-10 and the wings stay on. That, and some of his other maneuvers, did substantial damage to the aircraft, but it successfully landed and was repaired and according to Wikipedia is still in service.
10723992
You caught me red-handed.
That actually leads to one of the most interesting and difficult problems with this story: getting Rainbow Dash in the pilot’s seat. Helios 522 gave me a perfect situation to incapacitate both pilots but it also created a major problem too: how do I transition the situation that caused a real-life tragedy into a comedy without it being blatantly offensive?
I had two strategies to rectify this. First, the cabin crew here are trained with the lessons of Helios 522 in mind. Specifically, the flight attendant here immediately checks on the pilots when he suspects something is wrong instead of waiting till the last minute. Second, I diverted as much of the comedy away from the cabin depressurization and danger of hypoxia as possible. What’s funny in this story is that Dash, despite being cocky and annoying, actually knows what she’s doing. Moreover, no one believes her until she proves herself (and the experience also leaves her a little humbled too). Getting hypoxia and almost dying is still portrayed seriously but Dash somehow saving the day while realizing she’s not worthy of bragging about it is pretty funny.
I actually based the stall off of this video, although I had to make sure that a 737 could suffer the same situation. Something about the intensity of the wind, warning sounds, and visuals of a plane flipping over made it perfect material for a story.
I should stop. This is almost a blog post.
10723588
Allegedly there is a pilot based at my airport who inverted an unloaded MD-11 for the hell of it. Not sure how trustworthy the claim is but it’s fun to tell people.
10723588
Sadly FAA Regs on commercial operations, including Experimental testing, are so heavily regulated these days that you're lucky to get the thing off the ground without an agent jumping down your throat.
10723778 Don't forget Aloha Airlines, home of the first 737 Convertible. April 28, 1988, cruising at 24,000 feet, an 18-foot section of the plane's roof suddenly ripped off, causing an explosive decompression, creating a gaping hole in the fuselage and sucking a flight attendant out of the plane. It landed safely, although the aircraft was scrapped later, and none of the seats were usable due to stains.
Knew a few pilot who flew "Conair" flights on contracts.
Unruly inmates? reduce cabin pressure = sleepy time.
If you want aerobatics see 'Chuck Arron' and his Red Bull routine.
Good job on the story
From an ole Helicopter pilot
10723567
Heh, years back I got samples of the "Terrain, Terrain, Pull Up" and "Stall, Stall" announcements along with the Master Caution 'hooter' for the 767/737s that a mate of mine flew. I used them as the SMS and E-mail alerts (two separate email accounts) on an old phone and then on a camping trip where we had coverage, I'd sit the phone just outside his swag and then send emails or SMS's to it at sporadic random points in the night. Did this for a few nights and then started a 'spontaneous' discussion around the campfire one night talking about work 'haunting' your dreams on holidays. This went on for over a week with him getting more and more frustrated until I thought I'd better stop and let him enjoy the rest of the trip (plus we were going out of range of the network). It wasn't until another camping trip some years later where he brought up the whole thing when I finally admitted to him what had been going on. Dark looks and the associated threat of "Death awaits you with nasty, big, pointy teeth!" was mitigated when I said I'd loan him the phone to set up the same ambush for one of his colleagues on the charter flights he was then doing to mine sites in S.A. where the pilots stayed in the mine accommodations overnight. From all accounts his colleague is yet to forgive him for that stunt.
**Edit - Actually I think the "Stall" ones may have been from the Airbus he also flew at the time. He flies too many types, from Citations to A320s... He's flown Fokkers, Embraers, Metroliners, all sorts**
10724620
That’s actually amazing.
These PoE stories are probably one of the few reasons I still come back to this site. Great work! I did enjoy reading it.
This was really fun.
Listen to the Black Box Down podcast for more plane crash lore btw
I mean, they have space. If you asked, and a member of the Equestrian royalty accepted, they'd let you on. Depends on the size of the private craft, though.
They let them ride planes without appropriate saftey measures? What the fuck?
Honestly, after this one you take that pony for a ride on an F15-E.
She earned it. Besides, it'd be the first time she broke Mach 1 sitting down.
10725418
I feel like it would be a long learning process, honestly (heck, it’s not like we humans do all that great at disability accessibility, and that’s designing stuff for other humans). There’s lots of stuff you don’t think of until it’s a problem, to be honest. And then you hopefully learn from it and don’t make that mistake again.
Heck, just today we got that lesson at work. Doing rear bearings on a late-model GMC, I tear it down okay but can’t find the socket to put the nut back on, manager says we have one, but we don’t. Turns out they changed the design from what he knew and we had to buy a new tool to put it together again.
10725679
Oh, I didn't mean it in a "what a pothole" or "that would never happen" kinda way, but in a "these fucking idiots did this? Now of all times?"
I imagine its easy to forget when theres many, many other gaffs to worry about.
10725759
it’s really the ‘now of all times’ that always is the problem. Despite your best efforts, that’s when you find out your shortcomings, and if you’re lucky after the dust has settled everyone’s alive and you’ve learned a valuable lesson.
Oh yeah, totally. Reading the NTSB report for Sully’s jet landing on the Hudson, they were critical of Airbus for not having a shortform ditching checklist. At the time it was written, the theory was that the pilots would be at 30,000 feet and have lots of time to complete the items, there wasn’t any consideration for being at low altitude and the least worst idea being landing on water, and here’s the two or three things you must do.
Like, in the situation presented in this story, are there even pony-friendly seat belts? And if there are, is it actually tested, or just ‘this will probably work’? I could totally see nobody thinking whether a mask would actually fit a pony muzzle being on the radar as they board a commercial jet.
Smarter than she looks? If that isn't a backhanded compliment, then I don't know what is. Particularly, since she saved the lives of everyone on that plane. I mean, I get that he's shaken, and he's a bit snarky, and she's a pastel colored prismatic pony with wings from a magical land of friendship and harmony, so I suppose looks might be deceiving but still... Oh, unless he's intentionally being ironic, in which case fair game I suppose.
10725775
10725759
I stumbled across a saying during my research that I didn't find a good opportunity to use here. Whenever pilots in training ask whether they have to go through all of the checklists and check every detail, their mentors say "those checklists are written in blood."
all I can compare this to is the movie Flight. I imagine, the paperwork, the investigation would soon follow.
Brilliant!
The flight instructor in me was ready to go "Dammit, Dash! I don't care what your dad taught you, you're supposed to kick in opposite rudder for a wing drop stall!"
...To which her reply would have probably been something along the lines of "Uhh, ponies don't have rudders."
Good research efforts, for sure. Loved the little details like the twelve minutes oxygen supply, and the flight deck's 30 second emergency access code.
Alondro is on the plane... and hears that Dash is going to have to fly it.
Alondro opts to jump out and take his chances with gravity.
10726369
I BELEIVE I CAN FLY
10725834
Referring to the cold fact that most such safety regulations are made after someone dies horribly for not being safe, deliberately or otherwise.
Good short. What it does remind me of most is the test flight with a particular 717 (aka rebranded MD-95 after the merger) that had a nasty tendency to roll over near stall speed. The test pilots found this out and had to recover.
i'm gonna be honest I glanced at this story and first and assumed it was like Dash getting sucked into the engines
10726389 "VEGETA!!!"
"What is it Napa?"
"I can fly!"
"Erp… guh… yes you can."
10725834
The same goes for railroads—the rules of the road are written in blood.
Rainbow Dash Flight Simulator
10725782
You know, when I wrote that line, something about it felt right. I tried changing it before polishing and publishing the story but I couldn't bring myself to do so. It certainly is a back handed compliment that lets him have the last word. But when he follows that up with "and because of that, I'm still alive," he shows a certain respect for Dash no matter how much she pissed him off. She really did save his life and he's not gonna act like she doesn't deserve credit for that.
I should stop before I reveal my secrets.
10723567
Sounds like the sky version of sex move called the Raging Bull. While fucking your lady, passionately cry out her sister's name just before climax, now hang on for dear life!
I found out my radio at my security guard job can get tower and flights from the nearby airstrip. Like, I know that Guard frequency is meant to be used only for emergencies, but it seems to be used just by bored personnel looking to shitpost. Not a bad way to while through a dull shift. I'll have to say that terrain thing sometime. XD
10729072. I’d avoid saying that on any kind of aviation radio. It will freak out entirely the wrong people. The FAA has no sense of humor. Which is good.
10729076
Alas. My inner troll.
You would think they would’ve installed some sort of alarm system after such disasters where the oxygen wasn’t set right.
Still good story
10725418
Although after this incident the NTSB would push for supplementary oxygen (and seat belts, life vests, and other safety equipment) suitable for all sapients onboard, they don't have regulatory authority. Depending on the status of negotiations between human governments and Equestria, ponies might be considered animals by the FAA.
10725775
Oh, I bet somebody at the FAA would think of it. And, in just a few short years, a committee will have been formed to submit a draft proposal for procedures to select an advisory panel to design specifications for tests to evaluate pony safety equipment.
10726132
That scene was somewhat based on a real accident, Alaska flight 261, which sadly had a more tragic outcome than in the movie.
This was a surprisingly good read (and very little like what I expected).
10824782
That was the intention and I enjoyed taking what looked like a troll fic and making it something much more interesting. At the same time, I think I pushed the limits of the subversion a little too far. The story looks like either a straight-up troll fic, jab at Boeing, or just Dash being stupid. I wasn’t interested in any of those. Quite a few people probably got the wrong idea and skipped over the story and I think a small group was disappointed it wasn’t just a meme. But such is the process of trial, error, and learning.
She gulped, wrapped her hooves around the yoke, and tilted it to the left. The yoke rattled, causing me to jump back. Rumbling shook the plane. The plane leveled out, turned past level, and kept turning. A second later the horizons swapped. I looked up to the ground.
We were upside down.
I opened my mouth. “How the…”
“Shut up!” Dash shouted. “Nose down.”
She pulled up on the yoke. Up was now down.
“Thrust off.”
She moved both throttle levers back. The plane nosedived as the ground filled our view. Wind rushing past the plane roared and reverberated throughout the cockpit.
“Speed brakes.”
She moved a lever next to the throttle back a notch. A clacking sound filled the cockpit along with a “sink rate.” Details on the ground appeared.
“And slowly pull up.”
Dash gently pulled back on the yoke as the nose rose slowly. Shaking enveloped the plane as the roaring deafened my ears. A faint “pull up” cut through the noise.
“Come on.”
The nose rose to 30 degrees and to 20 and 10. The shaking intensified. “Terrain terrain, pull up!”
“Almost there.”
The nose pulled above the horizon. The rumbling weakened as Dash pulled the plane into a 20 degree incline. Once the rumbling followed by the clacking sound stopped, she disengaged the speed brake lever and slowly applied thrust to engines. As she leveled out the plane, we both sat there silent.
I turned to look at her. “What the fuck just happened?”
She kept her eyes on the instruments. “Our left wing stalled when you told me to level the plane out. Because our right wing still produced lift, I couldn’t stop the roll and we flipped over.”
“Yeah but… we were upside down and…”
She cut me off. “And so I brought the nose down, cut the thrust, turned on the speed brakes, and slowly pulled out of it. Pretty basic if you ask me.”
“Don’t tell me you learned that from the videos.”
“What!? No… every pegasus knows how to get out of a stall, even a roll over stall like that. That was the first thing my dad taught me when I started learning to fly. Nose down, stop flapping, that’s lesson number one.”
the wings be like: separating from the fuselage intensify
10723567
I was going to mention the barrel roll but you beat me to it by two years. 😆
I know I decided to read this on a plane - a 737 no less (MAX8, but still) - but I was not expecting this story to have a section involving the very airport I was flying out of.
So uh, congrats & thanks for making both my flight and reading experience all the more memorable!
As for the rest of the fic, it was an enjoyable read. While the somewhat more serious nature isn't quite what I expected, it was written pretty solid and still retained a lot of whimsy none the less, so I'm not disappointed in what I ended up getting.