Spike had grown quite large in the last ten years. His once soft spikes were now razor sharp, and his claws were strong enough to pierce a manticore’s hide. His flame was hot enough to reduce steel to a bubbling puddle in mere seconds. But while he had grown nigh impervious to any physical assault, his heart was an entirely different matter.
______________________________________________________________________________
Screw this. Why should I even bother?
Because you love her.
She doesn’t love me. Why should I care?
Because if you don’t, how else are you going to get her to love you back?
That is the stupidest reason I have heard. That one makes your last reason look smart, and you know how I felt about that one.
The fact that you would have made Rarity happy was not a stupid reason, and you know it.
Look, I’m tired of arguing with you. That is the only reason that I am doing this.
Tired of arguing with me? I AM you.
Oh, shut up already. You're giving me a headache.
Just knock on the door and I’ll go away.
Spike looked up at the door in front of him and sighed.
“Surprise surprise. Rarity wants me for something, how shocking. It seems to be all she has to do with me lately. It is never ‘Hey Spike, how are you doing?’ or ‘Would you like to go to dinner with me?’”
Spike rolled his eyes, an extremely impatient look on his face. He stared at the door, the door that he had gone in and out of more than that of his own home. He stared at it for a few minutes, sighed, put on his emotional armor, and knocked on Carousel Boutique’s front door.
********************
Rarity was in her room, preparing for Spike’s visit.
Oh, I hope Spike comes over! I asked Twilight to send him over. I really need to talk to him. Rarity paced back and forth in front of her full size mirror, anxiety coloring her features. She looked at her reflection in the mirror, checking to see if her mane was just right. I need to look my best, no matter what. I can’t be looking like a slob. That would be very unladylike. Rarity jumped a little at the sound of knocking on her front door. Knock, knock, knock. She turned, took a deep breath, and opened the door.
********************
The door opened, and there she was, standing just beyond the threshold, was the very center of Spike’s desires, Rarity. Oh, how he loved her! Her beauty was beyond compare, as far as Spike was concerned. His heart hurt, just like it did every time he looked at her. He hurt because, when he looked at her, he saw somepony that he was sure that would never be his.
Why did I have to fall for somepony like her? Somepony that will never look at me as more than a friend. No, you can’t think like that! She will be mine, someday... He looked at her more closely. On further inspection, she looked just as hurt and confused as he felt. Is it possible? Is she just as lost as I feel?
********************
Rarity looked up at Spike. It was weird for her to have to look up at him, when she had looked down at him for so long. He had gone through his first growth spurt just a little over four years ago, and he now stood almost twice as tall as Big Macintosh. He really has grown. He is no longer a child anymore. How do I do this, and it not make things more complicated than what they already are?
How about you just be honest with yourself and him? whispered a voice in the back of her mind.
What, tell him that I realized that I never truly appreciated him? That even after he saved me more than once from brutes, that I just took him for granted? Yeah, that really sounds wonderful.
Or you could just go on doing what you have always done. Not allowing yourself to be open with how you feel. Because that seems to work so well for you, the voice in the back of her mind said sarcastically.
Oh, do be quiet. I will handle this my way, without any help from some voice who thinks they know better than me.
“Rarity?”
I am you, darling. I am everything that you don’t want to hear and don’t want to see. I embody the truth that you push away everyday. Now, you will not push me away anymore, because I have things to say that you need to hear, and WILL listen to, said the voice in a smug tone.
“Hellooooo?”
Rarity’s head snapped up. She had not noticed that she had zoned out.
“Are you okay?”
“Yes, sorry Spike. I have been...distracted as of late. Please, do come in.” Rarity backed up, and opened the door wider so that Spike could get inside.
__________________________________________________________________________
They both went into the living and sat down on the couch, neither one of them wanting to start the conversation. After about five minutes of awkward silence, Rarity thinking to herself how she would broach the topic she wanted to bring up, and Spike trying to keep his emotions under control, Spike finally turned in his seat and said “So, Twilight told me that you wanted to see me?
Rarity perked up at this. “Yes, I did want to see you. You see Spike, I came to a realization yesterday. I know that I haven’t always been... the most generous pony, when it comes to you. That being said, I wanted to talk to you about my less than fabulous attitude towards you.
You see Spike, I knew that you had a crush on me from the very start. I just never put any real thought into what that meant for you. And for that, you have my deepest apologies. I was, and am, used to ponies falling head over hooves for me, so when you did, I just brushed it off as a typical reaction. I am much more than just my good looks and business acumen, yet most ponies don’t see past the surface when it comes to me. However, you are the one individual that saw past the surface, besides our friends. You saw me for me, and I had no idea how to handle that, and frankly, I still don’t.”
Spike looked calm and collected on the outside, but his mind and heart were in an uproar. What does this mean? Does this mean that I have a chance with her? That she finally has recognized that I truly care about her?
Don’t be so hopeful. This could just be her way of apologizing, without it actually meaning anything. She has done this sort of thing before.
Never like this though. She has never been this... well, unguarded in front of me. I can tell she is being genuine. The sound of Rarity’s voice shook him from his inner monologue.
“But, and this is really hard for me to say, I cannot reciprocate your feelings."
Oh god. That CLIFFHANGER! Rarity is really going to regret saying that.
You, sirrah, are worse than me on most of my things. And I am the masters at the cliffhangers.
Let the cliffhanger war... BEGIN!
(not really, I don't have the patience for that shit)
I like Spike fics that address this. Considering the canon I think it is about time that Spike got a striaght answer from Rarity on this feelings for her. That is the main reason why I'm not a fan of this pairing.
Yea this is good, but thanks to that ending I think the next chapter should have been named "Conflict", because it is really going to be some 'conflict' after that last statement.
I'm guessing Spike doesn't really have a chance now :-(
ough i just didnt see this comming...
First reaction: Say whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa??????!!?!?!?!?!
Second: Oh, NO she didn't!
Final: Oh, Cloudtop.... How I enjoy your stories!
Rarity you fucked up big time.
That bitch. Playing Spike all those years, I read ten years right, knowing how he felt, knowing his real feeling and not really considering what he felt as genuine. May she burn in a pit somewhere. Thinking he was just another pony.
This cliffhanger stirred so many emotions, I can't hold'em all. MOAR!!
Rarity, you don't love Spike!?
tgfb.net/drama/src/134426820110.gif
1905631>>1905771>>1905981>>1906000>>1906009>>1906254>>1906394>>1906854>>1907159>>1907265>>1907434>>1908540 Just wait until the next chapter. You think that this is emotion filled? This is nothing compared to what I have planned for the next chapter and beyond. Oh, and to all you who think that Rarity does not love Spike, shame on you for jumping to conclusions. One of my goals in writing this is to give Rarity some depth. A lot of people think that she is shallow, but I disagree. Rarity's reasons for her last line of dialouge in this chapter are a lot more humble than what you might think.
1909339
What's humble about breaking a young dragons heart? Let me guess dragons live too long and she doesn't want to hurt him, or given that fluttershy's in the picture another friend likes Spike. Well whatever, you have a lot of explaining to do mister.
1909374 Neither of those is the case. Trust me here. You will agree with her reasons. Oh, and hopefully Fluttershy will be making an appearance in the next chapter.
1909384
OH THANK GOD!! I've seen them use that excuse so many times it's a flimsy excuse at that. Now you have my attention why did she say that to Spike?
1909397 Lets just say that she does not want to rush into things, and thus hurt Spike even more in the process.
1909339
I know of Rarity's depth. She has been a major player in both of my major works so far.
Can you say viva la revolution?
1909423 Yes indeed.
I wish everyone was this frank in the brush-off. I've had the run-around soooo many times. I can't wait to see Spike's reaction.
1909589 No it will not. I am working on it right now, and have already typed just over three hundred words.
1909339
Like I said I believe that Spike deserves a striaght answer from Rarity on this. Though I can't wait to see what else you got plan.
1909608 I promise that it will not only meet your expectations, but blow right past them.
1909615
Don't keep me waiting too long.
1909654 I won't. I already have over 400 words typed.
1909670
WIsh I could troll everyone and pull you over to proofread, but it is not done yet. Close though, so close I can smell it
Either that or the cleaning shit.
....Both...?
1909820LOLOLOL Both. Definetly both.
1909339
Actually I do believe she loves him if that internal battle meant anything, but it just seems she is not willing to work and fight for it since she is so use to others fighting and working for hers.But I guess some answers will be answered in the next chap which we shall humbly/excitedly await for.
1910201 No promises, but you MIGHT, MIGHT being the key word here, you MIGHT get the next chapter today. If not today, then Monday for sure.
1909339
i like ya ya know...
1911057 Good to hear!
1840205 Sorry for not responding sooner! You didn't directly reply to my editing comment, so I never got a notification that you commented after me in the form of a reply.
With that said, no problem. It's my pleasure. When I promise to help, I do it. Anyways, I heard your story was updated, so I came back to check on it. Looks good so far, just add a bit more pacing and explanation for Rarity's choice of actions.
As for the proof reader offer, I'm really sorry. I would love to, but with the new semester coming up, I don't know if I have enough time to do it. However - if you fix/edit any chapters and want me to go over them, PM me at this account and I'll try to do it if my schedule allows me to squeeze in some time to grant advice. Sounds good?
Best of luck,
~hannahs98
1911073 Sorry about that. My mistake. I left that a cliffhanger ending on purpose. The next chapter, which is just about done, will go into tremendous depth. I am hoping to blow people away with it.
1911073 Oh, and thanks very much!
It was a stab in the heart!
2107919
You can actually pinpoint the second his heart rips in half.
I like this. Enough detail to convey the message on how much he has grown, but also enough to show that he was a softie at heart. Nice beginning of the chapter.
Unnecessary comma between 'because' and 'when'.
Bolded comma needs to be a semicolon. Semicolons are used to conjoin two sentences/long phrases with similar ideas or concepts. Commas, on the other other hand, are used to list multiple items, or link short phrases. This context would be more appropriate with a semicolon where I've recommended.
See these two paragraphs? (There are others like these, but this is an example.) Rarity is speaking for both of them. However, you are missing the quotation marks for the beginning of the second paragraph. None are necessary at the end of the first paragraph, to indicate that she's still speaking. However, the quotation marks are necessary to show that she's still speaking, rather than it being another paragraph.
Actually, I think you have improved a bit in this chapter! One thing I'd like to see more is a bit more of a back story as to why Rarity's so troubled. I mean, when you don't have feelings for someone else but you're friends, it's not really an anxiety kind of worry. It's more of an I-don't-like-you-in-the-same-way-but-I-still-want-to-be-good-friends type of way. Try to make the feelings more realistic based on your real life experiences. That way, it's more believable for the audience when they read it. It'll be a feeling that's easier understood because of its typical-ness.
Over and out!
~hannahs98
I know what you tried to do here but you could have just used the centre test alignment.
I now know where Sonic got the idea for voices in heads from for Return of the Master..
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO