At first, the trip home for the heroes seemed as if it were going to be alarmingly uneventful. It seemed that much of the excitement had happened while they were in transit from Helios’ world and there was more than one offer by Trixie to teleport them back- although these offers were not-so-tactfully refused. Luna was apparently in no shape to teleport them all either, though she was at least walking by the time they were outside of the forest. Once out in the moonlight, she started to look much more healthy.
Fortunately Zecora knew her way around the forest well enough to find the safest way out, and once out of the forest the group headed along its border towards Ponyville, the familiar town being the closest settlement. Not to mention, with what had happened over the last few days there would almost certainly be guards there that could help them. How those guards might react to their arrival was another thing entirely.
“I’m not worried,” Blinkie muttered as Ponyville came into view, smoke still rising from the disaster area that they had created on their last visit, “Who actually saw us there? I mean there were those guards but… really, after that explosion?”
“Awww…” Ditzy fluttered lazily above the group, frowning at the thought of guards having been fried, even if such a thing would be to the group’s advantage.
“No,” Inkie shook her head, “I believe the Princess would have saved them, but it should not be an issue since we have Princess Luna to vouch for us.”
“We are not even sure for what we shall be vouching,” Luna spoke as she peered over at the group, having taken to slowly walking with them. Apparently she was still too worn to fly herself, both physically and emotionally. Even without being out of sorts from her rather violent sibling reunion earlier, she appeared to barely comprehend most of their conversations, petty and argumentative as they had tended to be since the confrontation in the forest.
“I do not know what they mean,” Zecora observed, clearly worried as well, “but it does not sound legal- or clean.” She moved herself slowly over towards Luna, placing herself at the side of the Princess in case she was needed, and keeping herself and the Princess a few paces distance from the rest of the group.
“It’s a long story,” Gilda shook her head towards Zecora and Luna, “We over-reacted a bit- well, a lot… Let’s just leave it at that; I’m sure you’ll hear all about it at the trial.”
“Trixie would not worry if she were you,” Trixie spoke as she put her nose in the air, “Surely they will realize that we are the only ones capable of saving the world. In exchange for doing so, we shall obviously receive a full pardon, not to mention a huge celebration in our honor.”
“I hate saving the world!” Pinkie grumbled, staying near the back of the group and periodically needing the coaxing of her sisters to continue.
“It’s no use booing-” Zecora began, but her statement was quickly cut off.
Two figures swooped down from the sky, exiting a dark cloud as if appearing from nowhere. They moved so quickly that it was hard to even identify them as pegasi at first, one figure slamming hard into Zecora with his side, sending her literally flying into the others as if she were a large, striped bowling ball. The second figure landed with a heavy thump next to the first, the very impact seeming to bristle with energy that pushed outward against the group.
“-What are you doing?” Zecora blurted out, no small amount of surprise and fear in her voice as she slammed directly into Gilda, who in turn collided with all three Pie sisters.
Trixie, for her part, was far enough in front that she was able to hop forward and out of the way of the tumbling zebra, turning about to face the assailants. She looked at first as if she would be ready to attack, but almost immediately her horn glow fizzled out as she realized that they weren’t actually under attack, rolling her eyes instead.
It was, in fact, Luna’s two night guards, who had apparently mistook the group for villains. Though to their credit, this was not a far cry from the truth.
“Trixie sees you have found us,” Trixie crowed sarcastically, “There is no need to fret; the Great and Powerful Trixie, and her obedient minions, have already rescued Her Nocturnal Majesty.”
“That was rude!” Ditzy swooped down from her own spot, trying to help the others up, starting with Gilda since she had landed more or less on top.
“Oh I am so gonna end you!” Gilda roared out as she was rescued from the heap, though she paused when she realized exactly who the strange bat-pegasi were.
“Well that was fun,” Inkie spoke as she slowly rose back to her hooves. “Now would be a very good time for that royal vouch.”
Blinkie only grunted, staying on the ground for a moment, apparently having given up on much going right at this point, and it didn’t help that she was clearly not going to be allowed to blow up their attackers. She did give a slight smirk when Pinkie stuck her tongue out at the guards from underneath her, however.
“Be still!” came the booming voice of Luna from behind the guards, causing them to immediately startle with realization. Luna continued, “These citizens must be taken to the castle with us, for they may possess a power that we need.”
“So we’re not getting arrested?” Blinkie slowly pulled herself back up, shaking the dust off of herself.
“I know, right?” Gilda shrugged, “I keep expecting something to go wrong again.”
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Once the pegasi guards had found them, getting to the palace was a simple matter. A chariot was fetched from Ponyville, and the group was ferried quickly back to the castle without further incident. Zecora was asked to head to Ponyville and help, which she was more than happy to do as the group and the sudden ambush had left her more than a bit disheveled.
By the time the chariot arrived over Canterlot, everypony could see that the city was on high alert. The streets and skies surrounding the city were filled with patrols, looking as if every guard had been called to duty at once. The streets were empty of civilians, even considering the late hour, most of them having been herded to their homes or other places of safety. The chariot containing Luna and the heroes was immediately and without question escorted towards the castle upon arrival, and by the time they landed, Luna looked far more comfortable with how things were going. Likewise, the others were feeling stronger, if a bit achy from their recent run-in with the corrupted Rainbow of Light.
“We must waste no time,” Luna spoke to one of her honor guard as they approached the throne room, “Thou shalt take a battalion back to Ponyville, and have the zebra show thee the safest way through the forest to the crater. Excavate the area until the portal mechanism there hidden is uncovered.”
“An entire battalion, my Princess?” the night guard ear-perked up, blinking as if the request was not one he expected to be given. He would obviously have rather been given a duty involving the guarding of the city, or his princess.
“Indeed, thou art correct. Perhaps thou shouldst take two battalions,” Luna responded, not entirely catching the direction of his question. She cut him off before he could speak again, “Thou hast until the morn. Do not disappoint us.”
The two stallions that served as her honor guard gave a deep bow. Not questioning further, they took off towards the barracks. The group behind Luna watched these actions quietly in the meanwhile, none of them entirely certain what to think of the events she appeared to be setting in motion. They then followed her once again as she began towards the throne room, unsure of what else to do. At least the guards would leave them unquestioned if they were accompanied by the princess.
“Did you see the state the cathedral was in when we passed it?” Blinkie finally couldn’t hold herself in, “I wonder what kind of bomb was used; I hope I don’t have any competition.”
“Competition for what?” Gilda quirked an eyebrow, peering over at Blinkie. “Most terrifyingly insane?”
“No,” Inkie calmly asserted, “That damage was not caused by an explosion. It looked more like physical trauma."
“The Great and Powerful Trixie detected magical energy as well,” Trixie started to sound herself again, and had to pipe in to make sure everypony knew that she did, in fact, recognize magic, “If only Trixie had been available during the battle, perhaps she would have saved Her Majesty’s abode.”
“Maybe it was a temporal explosion!” Ditzy stated, almost happily, but then added more sadly, “I hope nopony was hurt.”
“Our brother Helios attacked the castle,” Luna spoke back towards them, her booming voice making them all jump back to watching her, “and some secondary damage occurred.”
“Secondary damage,” Gilda peered back over her shoulder, seeing the roof of the cathedral sag a bit more in the distance, then turning back and changing the subject. She waved her head towards Pinkie, “So what’s with her?”
Indeed, Pinkie was walking silently behind her, a sullen, angry look on her face as her eyes shifted between each individual who spoke. She did not even respond to Gilda’s statement other than to give her a particularly hateful glare.
“I know!” Ditzy looked sad again, “I tried making silly faces at her too, and even offered to make her muffins later, but nothing worked!”
“Pinkie?” Inkie seemed concerned too, waving a hoof near Pinkie and not receiving a response.
“Worry not over her condition,” Luna sounded back to them again. Even now, her voice made them jump, “For it is temporary, and shalt be rectified before the morn. It is then that you shall set out for the portal once more; for the fate of Equestria now lies within your hooves.”
“Equestria’s doomed,” Gilda murmured.
“We’ll make sure it goes out with a bang then!” Blinkie seemed only encouraged by the ominous prediction.
“Behold, our nation may be less doomed than thou dost imagine, for-“ Luna began to speak, but cut herself off as soon as she opened the door to the throne room. “And who, pray tell, gavest thou permission to sit upon the royal throne?” If her normal voice was loud, this was ear-shattering, all following her pressing hooves or claws against their ears.
Prince Blueblood was sitting quite casually in the royal throne, appearing to be reading some official documents, though when he set them aside there was a brief glimpse of a fashion magazine bundled between the important looking papers. These objects, as well as the martini that he had sitting on the side rest of the throne, were floated towards a small table to the side with his magic before he rose. He was obviously a bit startled by the yell but kept his demeanor.
“Auntie!” Prince Blueblood gave a very formal bow, then moved away from the throne, “I was just keeping it warm for you, obviously. I forgot how loud you could be.” His glance moved to the silent group of heroes behind Luna, “Ah, I take it this is the Plan B team?”
“We believed thee to still be in Ponyville, thou shouldst be out watching over our soldiers.” Luna calmed herself fairly quickly, perhaps only because it would not be conducive to their collective goals to be angry at him, but she was still certainly letting him know with her tone who was his better.
“Please, your Majesty,” Prince Blueblood’s tone did gain a certain amount of respect as well, perhaps not wanting to push his luck, “I think it would be better if I stayed here to help you; after all, at this rate I’ll be the one raising the sun tomorrow.”
“We are quite capable of that, as are others within the city, some of whom thou trained thyself. Thou shouldst have faith in them,” Luna responded, “However, your wish to aid us is fair. Wait aside and we shall speak shortly.”
Prince Blueblood nodded again, trotting calmly to one side and having a seat, eyeing the group with silent conceit as he waited. His eyes focused briefly on Trixie, who cleared her throat and shifted the tilt of her head to hide a blush behind the larger Gilda.
“Citizens!” Luna turned to the group, holding up one hoof. “We regret that there is little time to explain. Suffice to say, thou must rest before the morrow, wenst thou shalt become our arm in our brother’s world. We are not be strong enough to challenge him, there in his own world.”
The expressions on most of the teammates gave a very clear and confused ‘And we will be?’ at Luna’s assertion, but no one dared question her. Guards were called in, and each of the individuals was led to a room of their own.
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Gilda curled up on the bed, trying to rest. Her whole body ached thanks to days of hiking, fighting, and running around, and as comfortable as the royal suites tended to be, it was impossible to find a restful position in which to lay. Her mind was flooded with so many confusing thoughts, not to mention being particularly un-thrilled about her inclusion in a squad of super-hero ponies.
Her dreadful thoughts were interrupted by a knock at the door. The griffon groaned, rolling her eyes as she dragged herself off of the bed and moved slowly to the door. Opening it up, she was surprised to see Ditzy standing there, smiling gently.
“Ditz’?” Gilda seemed confused, “What are you doing here?”
“I came to see my favorite birdie-lion!” Ditzy smiled, “I had a cupcake, but I accidentally smoosh’ied it falling down the stairs on the way here. Sorry!”
“… our rooms are right next to each other.” Gilda pointed out, her voice deadpan.
“Really?” Ditzy looked down the hall as if to confirm this, then tilted her head and scratched it with one hoof, “I wonder what went wrong!”
“It doesn’t matter,” Gilda stated, trying her hardest not to roll her eyes. She paused, then took a deep breath before beginning, “Ditz’, you know I-“
“Greetings citizens!” Luna’s voice ruined any chance they had of having a moment, the Princess moving up behind Ditzy, “Thou shouldst be gaining thy rest.” Her voice certainly wasn’t aiding in that.
“I was just saying goodnight to my nice friend Gilda!” Ditzy stated, almost happily, one wing flapping a few times and causing her to suddenly lean over and bump into the frame of Gilda’s door.
“Yeah it’s cool, I don’t mind her being here,” Gilda tried to be casual.
“Maybe I could sleep in your room so we could cuddle!” Ditzy’s statement was clearly one of the most precious innocence, but it still made Gilda’s eyes widen.
“Ah, uh…” Gilda stammered.
Luna looked back and forth between them, gears in her head appearing to be turning as she was momentarily quiet.
“I won’t keep you up!” Ditzy assured, “It’s just you’re really nice to me so…”
“It is a good to see ponies and griffons getting along so well; clearly you are truly kind, fair Gilda, to have the respect of such a nice young mare.” Luna observed, looking at Gilda expectantly.
“I uh…” Gilda stammered again, looking even more self-conscious.
“Yep, she’s the nicest griffon ever! All the other ponies like her too ‘cause she’s so nice to them!” Ditzy seemed almost proud, “She was at a party once in Ponyville, too; I wish I could have gone!”
“Indeed, for she is the very essence of affection!” Luna seemed almost purposefully to be digging it deep.
“Ditzy…” Gilda began, quietly.
“Yep! And she-” Ditzy started to continue.
“Ditzy!” Gilda cut her off this time, breathing heavily as if suddenly even more exhausted, “Please… “
“Is there something thou wishest to share with us, fair Gilda?” Luna looked at her without the least change in demeanor.
“I’m not a nice griffon, Ditzy. Me being nice to you is the exception not the rule,” Gilda huffed, “’Fact is, I crashed that party pretty bad, even though it’d been thrown for me… all because I was jealous that Rainbow Dash might like Pinkie Pie more. About all I did during that visit was make ponies cry, take their stuff, or insult them. Ditzy… I’m sorry, but I don’t deserve you.”
Ditzy quirked her ears, then shook her head and gave Gilda a brief hug, “But you’re nice now!”
“Maybe,” Gilda offered, her voice uncertain. “I think maybe you’re just too nice to notice how much of a jerk I am.”
“We are impressed, fair Gilda.” Luna spoke, and without further explanation turned to head back down the hall way.
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As much as Ditzy wanted someone to cuddle with, Gilda had insisted that she return to her own room, so she had eventually relented and been on her way. She had been heading back to her room for some time before she realized that she had somehow ended up in the wrong part of the castle, all alone in one of the ballrooms.
She turned about, sitting on her haunches as she turned back and forth to see if she could determine the way back. It must have been a few more minutes still before somepony else noticed her.
“Oh, it’s you,” a deep voice jumped from the darkness, before the form of Prince Blueblood stepped out of the shadows.
“It sure is!” Ditzy promptly ignored the dismissive tone as if not even noticing it, “I got lost on the way back to my room; I was visiting Gilda!”
Prince Blueblood peered as if not quite believing her, “We placed your rooms next door to each other, if memory serves.”
“I know! It’s crazy!” Ditzy nodded in agreement, “This palace is really easy to get lost in!”
Prince Blueblood blinked down, and she blinked right up at him in return. A few exchanged blinks later, he took a deep breath, shaking his head.
“Maybe if you’re an idiot, it is,” he huffed.
Ditzy blinked, her smile fading just slightly, “Well it was because…”
However, her words were cut short, “No, it was because you are completely incompetent. I mean, if you were laughter, I might dismiss this as you trying to make me laugh, but you’re not, and if you were you would be doing terribly at that anyway since I’m not laughing.”
Ditzy’s eyes glistened slightly as she stared up at him, but he didn’t stop.
Blueblood seemed unaffected, “The fact is, your foolishness is an outright danger to the mission, and I intend to make a case to Princess Luna asking your exclusion. Even if it means being an Element short, not having such an absurd excuse for a hero amongst them would still be an advantage.”
Even as tears rolled down Ditzy’s face, he continued, turning his nose up, “I mean just look at you! Bubbles for a cutie mark? What does that even mean? Is it a symbol for stupidity?”
He started to continue, but his words were completely cut off. Not by Ditzy crying, running away, or getting angry, but by her reaching out and leaning forward to hug him with both forelegs.
“I’m so sorry,” Ditzy sniffled, “You must feel really bad to want to say stuff like that; I really hope you can find something that makes you happy.”
Blueblood blinked slowly, looking stunned, trying to decide if she was trying to insult him creatively or if she was serious. She appeared to be quite serious as she looked up at him.
“There’s nothing I can do?” she asked, reaching a hoof up as if ready to wipe a tear away should one appear, even if none did. “You need somepony to talk to? Even if it’s angry talk, I’m here for anypony.”
“It’s…” Blueblood’s eyes opened widely, stunned, “Not something I can… well…” he hmph’ed, “So she was right about you, then.”
And with that, the Prince gently pushed Ditzy away, turning to take his leave of her. On his way out of the ballroom, he waved a hoof to a nearby passing guard, instructing them to escort the pegasus safely back to her room- and see that she did not wander off again.
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Pinkie Pie lay on the bed in the dark chambers to which she had been taken, or rather dragged kicking and screaming as she shouted about hating royal suites. The room was presently in shambles: the sheets were torn from the bed, candles and decorations were torn from the walls and thrown onto the floor, and the door was cracked from having been repeatedly bucked at as she tried to get out. Eventually having given up on her rage, the dejected party pony had collapsed onto her back on the floor, immobile and feeling very little like a party pony.
Perhaps Luna had only been waiting for her to let off some steam, or perhaps she had stopped to speak with Blueblood on the way, because it was not long after the noises ceased that the locks on the door began to unfasten with the dark glow of her magic. The door swung open, and in stepped the royal figure of Princess Luna, followed shortly by Prince Blueblood.
“Pinkamena Diane Pie. It is time.” Princess Luna’s voice boomed, walking towards the pink pony on the floor as her magic shut the door behind them.
Pinkie did not answer, dragging blankets from the nearby bed to cover her head as if purposefully ignoring them.
Prince Blueblood moved to stare down at her as well, looking as if he felt somewhat silly, even rolling his eyes slightly, “All right, I promised I’d try not to enjoy this.”
“Silence nephew; it is the only way!” Luna seemed dead serious, approaching Pinkie slowly from one side.
Just as she was going to reach out for the pink pony, Pinkie Pie darted towards the door with surprising speed. It wasn’t surprising enough to break the telekinetic grasp of two royal ponies, however, and the escaping, dull-pink figure quickly rose from the floor and left running in midair.
“Why does this keep happening?!” shouted Pinkie, clearly enraged once again at her sulking being interrupted.
“Hold! It is for thine own good!” Luna said with the most serious of tones, moving back to Pinkie’s side as Blueblood took up the other side with a slight chuckle breaking through his normal manner.
Turning Pinkie about in mid-air so that she was briefly upside down, Luna pushed her back onto the floor with her telekinesis. Pinkie gasped as Luna’s hoof went up into the air and suddenly came down onto the pink pony to… tickle her.
“Come nephew, aid us!” Luna commanded towards Blueblood.
Blueblood shook his head, but followed the orders given him, “I suppose I asked for this when I offered to help.”
Both Luna and Blueblood were soon using both of their forehooves to tickle over Pinkie, under her and down her belly and around her neck. Pinkie tried very hard to resist the torture, and for a while looked as if she would stay angry, struggling and yelling things far from suited for the ears of royal ponies.
That ended when Luna’s magic grasped a pillow from the bed, bringing it over and shredding it apart so savagely that feathers went everywhere. “Behold nephew! I hath devised a new strategy!”
Blueblood chuckled, “Okay, I guess I am enjoying this after all. Better than the last one at least; by Faust that was depressing.”
And with that, each of the royal ponies took hold of a dozen or more feathers, and Pinkie was surrounded by a tickling mass of them. Within seconds, the pony went from angry to bursting out in laughter, kicking her legs about frantically, nearly hoofing the two other ponies in the head numerous times. This went on for several minutes, unyielding, not stopping until they were certain that they had succeeded.
Soon, Pinkie’s coat shined bright pink, returned suddenly to its normal shade as tears of laughter ran down her cheeks. The resultant glowing flash nearly blinded the two tickling her to the point that they temporarily lost their grip and she was allowed to crawl back towards the bed. However, once there, she only fell onto the mattress and giggled more.
“That was hilarious!” Pinkie laughed, pointing at the royal duo in her room, “I almost went gray again and trashed the room!”
“Huzzah! We are victorious!” Luna raised a hoof as if in victory, then added more calmly after a brief pause and glance about the room, “We shall fetch a maid.”
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Blinkie sat on her room’s balcony and angrily stared at the dark sky, the forms of patrolling pegasi passing overhead from time to time. Unlike her sister, her mood was pretty much on par for her, not something that she was going to give up. From the noise next door, which was also what drove her to find refuge on the balcony, she guessed that Pinkie was back to her old self, though she wasn’t certain if it was a relief to her or not.
Her ears twitched as she heard hoofsteps against the stone path below her, looking down into the courtyard. A dark figure was speaking to one of the night-guard, not being overly loud though their voice still carried through the still, night air.
“We don’t exactly have explosives on hand for this sort of thing, and some of the ruin walls are enchanted specifically to ward off magic. It’s becoming quite a task,” the night guard was informing the dark figure.
“What about the visitors?” the figure replied in a deep, unfamiliar voice, “Aren’t some of them rock miners? Maybe they have a store of them.”
“What? No, I’m afraid not,” the guard replied, “One of them is an explosive expert, but they aren’t technically allowed to sell them.”
“But they’ve been seen with them, yes?” the figure asked, waiting for a moment as the guard nodded in response, “Then go to them and offer them any money that we can afford under the table, for the explosives we need.”
“I’m afraid we don’t have any money for that sort of thing, especially with the repairs that need done,” the guard replied thoughtfully.
“So we’ll dig into gala funds or raise a few taxes, just make it happen.”
“Don’t bother,” Blinkie called down, causing them both to freeze.
“Pardon?” the guard asked.
“Ah,” the figure replied, “We did not know you were awake. What was that?”
“Don’t bother digging into funds, come on up and I’ll give you directions to my store, there’s more than enough there and you can take all you need,” replied Blinkie, “I don’t need payment, you can have what you need now and in the future. Not breaking any laws if I’m not selling after all.” She sounded almost bitter.
“Thank you,” the figure stated, giving her a nod, “You heard her.” The figure nodded to the guard, who flapped his wings to head up to the balcony.
Blinkie nodded to the guard as he arrived before her, sighing slightly, then turned back to regard the figure again, only to find it had vanished as if into smoke and was now gone.
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Inkie smiled quietly to herself, slowly beginning to doze off to sleep. She also had heard Pinkie’s laughter, and was relaxed in the knowledge that her sister was back to her old self. She too however, was not going to be allowed to sleep quite yet.
A knock on the door brought her back to full wakefulness again, and the mare rolled out of bed and calmly trotted over towards the door. When she opened it, she regarded an unfamiliar stallion on the other side of the doorway. It was hard to get a good look at him in the dimly lit hallway, but he appeared to be of dark blue complexion, dark eyes, and a mining pick for a cutie mark on his visible flank. On his collar she noticed the symbol of the Equestrian Excavations Board.
“Hello.” Inkie’s voice sounded calm as ever, not betraying her confusion.
“Miss Inkamena Pie, I’m glad I caught you,” the stallion nodded, not showing himself in. “I’m Diggy Gem, from the Equestrian Excavations Board. I hope you don’t mind me bothering you here in the midst of all this, but it is rather convenient; you see, it’s about your resume.”
“I sent that in months back,” Inkie replied calmly, “What’s this?”
“Oh yes,” Diggy replied, “Well it got lost in the paperwork, suffice to say you are perfect for a new project up north, so we wanted to make plans with you now.”
“And my sister Blinkie?” Inkie asked.
“Well,” the stallion seemed somewhat more reserved, “I’m afraid she is not allowed to practice, so we can’t accept her; I’m sure you understand.”
“I don’t work unless she works,” Inkie asserted calmly once again.
“This job pays a great deal of money, Miss Pie, enough for you to send some back to her if you wish,” he explained, “In fact, we could leave right now if you wanted.”
“This isn’t about money,” Inkie cut off further words from him with sternness that was unusual for her, “I don’t care if I am never able to get a job because of it, I do not work without Blinkie being able to work. And I will certainly not leave Canterlot when I am needed by the others here, against Helios.”
“Now Miss Pie, be realistic,” Diggy kindly suggested, “The real Element holders are gone, another group isn’t going to be wielding them any time soon, and how is living under another alicorn’s rule going to differ significantly anyway? It would be better for you, safer for your family, and more profitable in general if you…”
“No.” Inkie cut him off again, and he found the door slamming hard in his face. So hard that the door stop came slightly loose from the impact.
Inkie left back to bed, not giving it another thought and suffering no regret for her decision. As for Diggy, he only smiled, fading back into starry mist that disappeared down the hallway.
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Of all the team, Trixie was having the hardest time getting to sleep. Not because of worry or outside distractions however, but because her own imagination was running wild. She couldn’t stop the vision of herself being greeted in Canterlot, victorious after a long journey to the other world, showered in gifts and given a place of honor among Canterlot’s elite. She even envisioned Twilight Sparkle bowing before her, thanking her for being rescued and admitting that she was her superior. That bit in particular really made her smile.
Yet as she continued, her visions began to bother her for a reason that she could not pinpoint. It was strange; she had always enjoyed her fantasies before, and now there was reason for them to come all the clearer.
It was at that point that her visions were completely broken by a brief knock on her door. There was no delay or waiting for her to open it before it opened itself, the large form of Prince Blueblood strolling into her room with his typical smug look on his face.
“Ah, the Great and Powerful Trixie. Settling in?” he smirked, moving to stand at the edge of her bed and idly poking a hoof at the piece of enchanted chain that was laying on her dresser; apparently Trixie had carried the piece all the way from the magical ruin.
“The Great and Powerful Trixie has already settled in,” Trixie not too subtly hinted that he was disturbing her, but decided not to push it, “Is she needed by his Majesty?” She tried very hard not to blush, not having anyone to hide behind this time.
“Oh don’t worry,” smiled Blueblood, “I’ll let you rest, but I just wanted to let you know that I’ve taken care of things; spoken to Princess Luna and all.”
“Taken… care of things?” Trixie didn’t want to admit that she didn’t understand, but all the same.
“Of course,” continued Blueblood, “You don’t need those ruffians getting in your way; you’re clearly a superior specimen. So they shall be sent home tomorrow, while you will lead our best warriors and mages into the portal to take care of this… Helios. It’s better this way.”
Trixie was silent for a moment, then spoke up again, less sure, “Trixie does not understand how that is better.”
“Well you will get all the credit you deserve, after all!” Blueblood nodded, “I’m sure you’d rather be on your own stained glass window than have it crowded with other ponies, yes?”
“No,” Trixie replied, after a certain pause and somewhat quietly.
“I beg your pardon?”
“Trixie does not wish to take credit on her own,” Trixie replied, more clearly, “She would not have been able to get so far without the help of her companions, and she refuses to take credit at all if her friends do not also receive their due.”
“Really?” Blueblood hmm’ed, “Well you’ve mentioned your rival, so I figured it would be more impressive if…”
“Trixie thanks his Majesty for his thoughts,” Trixie shook her head, “But Trixie’s friends are more important to her now than ‘being impressive’ to her rival.”
Blueblood smirked again, temporarily slipping into a Trixie accent from exposure, “Very well, Prince Blueblood will let Her Majesty know.”
And with that, he left Trixie to herself, allowing her to get some sleep and to think about what she had done. Once outside, a familiar starry mist approached him in the hall, solidifying into Luna before him. She raised her head to look squarely into his eyes as he closed the door behind him.
“And?” the Princess asked.
“You were right,” Blueblood replied, “It seems that every one of them has passed the tests you devised; you’re pretty good at this, Auntie.”
“Then tomorrow shalt be their true test.”
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Far away from Canterlot, Spike sat still in his cage, staring at his hands and sighing to himself. He hadn’t been treated poorly since his arrival, at least once he was extracted from the grips of his captors. The ponies that were now taking care of him weren’t even all that bad; they were in fact quite kind to him, and seemed to be in good spirits despite the obviously poor conditions of their homes in Undervale. They spoke of Helios with reverence and respect, just as the ponies he knew back home spoke of Celestia, and Spike had not bothered to try to contradict them.
He kept hoping that he would catch a glimpse of Twilight or the others, but he hadn’t since he was dragged out of Twilight’s cell. He knew that they were holding him far away from the others so that they wouldn’t try anything funny. He could only assume that they hadn’t escaped, as he imagined he would not be nearly so comfortable if that were the case.
At the very least there was no shortage of food here for him. Gems were not high on the list of priorities for most of the these ponies, so he was freely given of the nearby gem deposits so that he wouldn’t deplete their own food supplies. This didn’t help as much as it should have, because every time he stared into a gem he thought of Rarity and how miserable she must be in her filthy conditions, and that led to thoughts of Twilight being forced to work for fear of their hurting him. He had started to think all of this was partially his fault.
“Oh, hi there,” a somewhat grating voice from the edge of his cage spoke up, prying him from his depressed thoughts, and Spike blinked as he looked up.
Outside of his cage was, of all things, a baby dragon. It might have been slightly older than Spike, or perhaps just very slightly greedier, as it was just a bit larger than he was. The dragon was covered in pinkish scales, lighter scales down his chest, and dark green frill down his back in a similar pattern to Spike’s own. The dragon’s purple eyes blinked at Spike from the other side of the bars.
“Oh uh… hello?” Spike stammered, rising to his feet and heading towards the bars, “Uh… “
“Um, hi…” the other dragon looked slowly back and forth, “Hey do you mind if we talk for a bit?”
Spike flinched slightly, “Dude, your voice is grating.”
“What?”
“Nothin’, it’s not important,” Spike shifty-eyed slightly, backtracking as he did not want to offend a potential friend, “So a dragon living with ponies? Guess we got somethin’ in common right? What’s your name? I’m Spike.”
“Oh uh,” the other dragon looked almost unsure if he should answer, “I’m Spike…”
“Really?” Spike, the purple Spike, blinked at that, “Well I’m gonna call you Pink then, because calling you Spike is gonna’ be way more creepy than I can handle right now.”
“Oh uh, okay,” the pink dragon consented easily enough, “I was just wondering… you were with the evil ponies, right?”
“Evil ponies?” Spike asked, then shook his head, having overheard enough to know that Pink was talking about his friends, “Look dude, we’re not evil. We would have come and helped if you’d just asked; it’s what we do. Instead we were knocked out, beaten up, threatened, and my friends are being forced to work in fear that I’ll be killed if they don’t. Who’s evil?”
Spike was surprised at how easily the pink version of himself agreed, “I know…” Pink even sniffled slightly, “My friends weren’t always like this… it’s… it’s Him. He affects them somehow, and I don’t know why. I want to help him, ‘cause he can save us all, but… I don’t like how he’s saving us. I want my friends back… I want to feel like a good guy again…”
It was at this point that Spike noticed what the pink dragon was holding in both his hands. It was a key, tightly clasped as if afraid of being seen with it. Spike didn’t have to ask; his eyes made the question for him as they locked onto it.
The pink Spike sighed, “Promise me that your friends will come back after you rescue them, and help us? Promise that you’ll bring us to your world so we can live like we used to again?”
“I promise,” Spike nodded, “Absolutely, you can count on me!”
Very reluctantly, the pink dragon moved his claws to place the key into Spike’s. Then, as silently as he had arrived, the pink Spike hopped off into the cave. Spike looked back and forth to be sure his tenders were not watching, and quickly began to unlock his cage door.
-----------------------------------------------------
“Here we are,” Posey smiled down at Twilight Sparkle, who was now strapped down onto one of the metal tables in the medical room of the underground base, “This won’t take too long, yours is the last one and we’ll start.”
Twilight felt nervous, laying there on one table as her friends were lined up on the tables next to her. Her breath was fast, and she felt the straps from the machine on her head dig slightly into her. The newer version of the extractor that she had reluctantly helped to design only needed to latch onto their heads, and it could even take all of their Elements in at once. In theory, this would leave them drained, but they would recover some hours later. In practice… well, Twilight was unsure.
She heard a grunt next to her, though she couldn’t turn her head far at the moment. It was Applejack, whose helmet had been completely applied and who, like her other friends, could not speak. It was an obvious question, and Twilight felt it had been directed at her.
“Just calm down, everypony,” Twilight tried to assure her friends, “The other ones aren’t even here, and you know Posey isn’t going to let anything go wrong, she’d turn the machines off first.”
“Well, maybe,” Posey replied, gently lowering the facemask part of the helm onto Twilight to cut off her speech as well, “Actually, I’m afraid I haven’t been very honest with you.”
And for a moment, there wasn’t so much as a grunt from any of the ponies, including Twilight.
“Oh this is a little bit embarrassing,” Posey sounded almost motherly when she talked, “It’s weird, you know? It comes and goes sometimes, like I can see myself doing things but I don’t really have control over them, but overall I’ve been more deceptive than nice.”
Posey moved over towards the main portion of the machine, rolling dials as she readied it for activation, “You see, it was more or less just a way to get you to talk. You remember that whole incident in the hallway where I used the stare to stop Surprise from beating on you?” she giggled, slightly amused, “I didn’t really, I mean I can’t do anything like that, Twilight had just told me that Fluttershy could and not to look her in the eyes, you know. So I used the idea, we set up a scenario while you were blinded and while Spike was fairly out of it to convince you that I was on your side. It’s a little amusing, but Twilight, our Twilight, still punished Surprise despite it being a setup.” She giggled in a disturbingly good-natured way, as if she expected them to find that part amusing.
The muffled voices were quite prominent now, though it was hard to make out anything they said. Especially Rainbow Dash and Applejack, who were very much near breaking their tables. At least this meant they had recovered well, if nothing else. As for Twilight, she simply lay there, listening, desperate tears streaming down her face.
“You did design the machine well, Twilight, and I don’t have to kill you with it.” Posey raised her voice just enough to let them hear it above the angry, frantic grunts, “But I’m going to anyway. Then I’ll prove once and for all that I am the best conditioned; maybe I’ll even get to be Helios’ second hoof pony. I bet he’ll be so proud.”
And with a last kindly giggle, she pulled the switch to on.
Well here it is, chapter 13, the one that blocked me for so long. Yes, it's self-titled, but its appropriate I can't say I'm not nervous about publishing it after so long, sorry for the delay. Likely about a week until chapter 14, then another week til last chapter 15! Possibly an epilogue chapter to wrap up a few things after, though things will be resolved in 15.
Oh Posey.. i hear ya like cupcakes. you want any? *Grabs butcher's knife*
Anyway... Good chapter, and sorry if i offended anypony with the cupcakes reference.
YOU UPDATED!!!!!!!!!!!!!
finally. this was a excellent read and cant wait for the chapter next week
also
OH MY GOD POSEY!!! IT WAS ALL A LIE!!
again good story and update consistently
GOD DAMNIT YOU BITCH FACE WHORE
*ahem*
Good story, I love it.
Once Posey's mind is back to normal, she's not going to much like herself.
Well, I'm normally such a nice fellow, so I'm surprised that I am, proudly, one of the 17 down voters. Perhaps he is affecting me, hmmm? More likely that this is a just a bad story. It is technically well written and I did not notice any obvious spelling errors as I struggled through this very un-FiM story. I did enjoy Luna's tests, but so many other things have formed this massive blur of discordant energy that I cannot form coherent thoughts at the moment. I want my lost hours back.
Sorry I did not like it, obviously many others do, so you must be doing something right.
oh, now we have to wait again :S.
well we are close to the ending, i cant wait for it :D
I hate writer's block. Not a fun thing to overcome.
And that's when we find out Twilight put a safe guard in that won't let it kill them? Or she pulls a Tony Stark and made a secret battle suit!!!!!!
Well... Posey certainly showed HER true colours
Finaly! i have been waiting so long for this i thought you may have died and it would never be finished!
SWEET HELIOS IN THE SKY IT UPDATED! Thank you, I was worried this story was dead.
Also, guess we figured out why they call her Posey.
245662 Well Posey is a gardener, so maybe she needed some humus. More seriously yeah, it is a bit of an unintentional reference that I wish I could have avoided more effectively.
245709 245741 245741 246916 Poor Posey I think she will would take things the hardest.
246300 According to the last few comments in your profile, you're not normally nice at all, I'll assume you were having a bad day. Not really sure what to think about someone that reads 13 entire chapters, can think of an example of something that is good but not of anything that is bad, and then claims a fanfiction (which is by definition an alternate universe from canon) is not enough like FiM. You are going to have a very hard time on this site if you think these stories are going to read like episodes from the show; what's the point of fanfiction if it doesn't do different things than the show?
I love criticism, and some posts have actually changed the direction I took or even altered previous chapters, but your post contains no criticism; it's just sort of empty. I question whether you've actually read the whole thing, or if you read only the last chapter (in which case it would make almost no sense at all).
246631 Well next chapter is in editing, so it shouldn't be longer than a week unless something unexpected happens. I'm still nervous about the ending twists, which I think could be better, but people seem to be liking overall.
246767 I need to write some shorter stories.
246824 Yes, Twilight Sparkle did put a safeguard in so it wouldn't kill them, that's why Posey needed to get the knife Though I don't know if it's much of a cliff-hanger at this point as often as I've threatened to kill ponies and not done so
246927 I got better.
247054 "Yes, Twilight Sparkle did put a safeguard in so it wouldn't kill them, that's why Posey needed to get the knife Though I don't know if it's much of a cliff-hanger at this point as often as I've threatened to kill ponies and not done so"
And that is when you do the unexpected and kill them cause no one was beliving you would!
247054 I was making the cupcakes reference, not the fic far as I could tell. I tend to resort to referencing it when I'm really really pissed at somepony.
Substitute Harmony is one my favorite stories, and I happily give it two hooves way, way up. The writing is breezy and fun, but it's the whole absurd (and absurdly entertaining) premise of the story that has kept me checking religiously for an update. The G1 alternate world is a clever juxtaposition with Equestria, and probably enough for a story on its own, but you went the extra mile by pitting the gleefully demonic G1 alternates not against the Mane 6, but against Pinkie Pie and a group of lovable delinquents, whose incarnations in this story are largely your own creation. I really can't say enough good things about this story. It doesn't pretend to be an earth-shaking literary epic, but what it promises - fun, adventure, suspense and silliness - it delivers in spades. Everything that needs to be good to make this story work is good - or better than good. I dare you to read Substitute Harmony and not smile and laugh in spite of yourself, and then immediately dive back into the story. I'm Ponydora Prancypants and I approve this fanfic.
247420 I soo agree with this person (pony) that substitute harmony is THE best fanfinction. Oh and blayzehohime thanks for curing Pinkie Pie
Yay! Update!
246300
Yay! Azlan has read this story!
...and he hates it? What the hay?
I'd try to get Mab/Ambaaargh to read this, but last I heard, she isn't fond of horses, so she might be avoiding FiM in general.
I agree with everything 247420 said. I'm glad I discovered this over on EQD. You have a great narrative going. I really like Helios' character, and I'm so looking forward to discovering exactly what went wrong with Princess Selene. Everypony has different viewpoints, and I'm thinking (as these things often are) that the truth is somewhere in between. Celestia might be the only one who knows, but she's not talking at the moment.
I'm glad they were able to recover Pinkie Pie's laughter. Goes to show that Magic is innate, that it can never really be Stripped from you, just siphoned or suppressed. Question is, can the merry band of misfits wield the power of the Elements without the actual necklaces and crown-thingie? Will they have to retrieve them? Or will they be able to use those powers by virtue of journeying to the realm from whence they came?
Can't wait for the next bit! Keep up the good work.
As the Kool-Aid man would say....OH YEAH!!!! As much as people call Fallout Equestria one of the best Fanfics I rave for substitute Harmony. But Now Im feeling mixture of excitement and sadness that its ending I really have enjoyed the ride this Fic took me on and the only thing I can say is Thank You P.S. Posey you are gonna get some FlutterRage in your life real quick!
finally another update TwT... great to see you continued it ^O^.. now to read.. >w>
247198 What a !!
247240 I don't find anything wrong with stories like that if they are done well actually. I considering having a much higher body count in this story, but couldn't get myself to do it cause I'm gutless
247420 Aw, that was really sweet to say. >.>
Being my first pony fic, I actually learned a lot, like the dangers of having too many characters and how hard it makes the writing, and how hard time travel is on plot Credit goes to Florentine too, though. The story is mine, but he did a great job of helping me improve my grammar and language choice so it reads better than it did.
.247568 I confess that one of my primary reasons for doing that with Pinkie Pie was an overwhelming desire to tickle her silly. I love her adorable giggles
247573 Well everypony has to hate something, so I don't mind. Actually I really do want to hear from people that don't like it, it's just I like them to say why they didn't like it so I know. Sometimes people that don't like it make really good points, after all.
Though if someone doesn't like equines, I'm afraid my story may be lost on them :P
247584 Anyone with a name that adorable has to have a point.
Helios is roughly based on the villain for a non-fanfic novel I wrote that I haven't had the guts to attempt to publish; maybe I should get on that some day.
247667 I think I might write some other shorter things that occur in the same universe after the epilogue. I love Doctor Who, so I thought about doing a Derpy and Whooves fic, even though I realize that is so overdone by this point it's not even funny.
247922 It's YOU! ... Hi.
The G1 six are going to need so much deprogramming when this is all over. Helios has really messed with their heads for Posey of all ponies to say that.
I would like to see how the other G1 ponies are.
247573 I'm not sure what Amber's (MissMab) stance on Ponies happens to be. You'd have to ask Mabula herself.
247054 If I base it off of the most recent chapter only, I would have to say I rather like it. It is true that I can identify specific points I like, such as the MiB homage with Celestia getting her head blown up and it reforming and quoting the same movie line, Blinkie as an explosives expert, etc.
However, the dislikes are broad of scope. Helios is a terrible villain. Not that he is written poorly per se, but his personality seems forced, not natural (that is to say it does not flow with what you are trying to paint him to be), and it is almost like you are trying way too hard to achieve the Best new wacky villain award. Every scene he is in is like getting whacked in the face with the giant soaking wet foam bat of bad cliche and campiness. Not to say that there is anything wrong with the use of cliche and camp, but Helios just feels wrong.
The necessary plot points and achievements seem to fall into place far too easily for team Helios. I don't get the sense that there is any doubt that there is a possibility for failure for Helios and his side, nor do I see that there is any possible way for the Substitutes or Mane crew to ever succeed. I recognize that there is an attempt to make it appear that each side is struggling and experiencing adversity, but it is hollow. I can clearly see that team Helios will always achieve a measure and the Substitutes/Mane crew will always experience largely measured setbacks until a point of threshold is reached for reversal. As a player of RPGs and a gamemaster of many systems, I understand a need for this type of approach, but it should be veiled much better than it is here.
I am not sure of the approach you are using, but I find it hard to sympathize with the G1s or Helios in the least bit. As others seem to be able to, I regulate this one to being just me.
Once again, not being able to speak towards the G1s, the 'other' background ponies (like the Pie sisters), or your OC, I can evaluate the personalities of the canon characters though. Each one just seems off for some reason, and it makes it hard to read when they are present in the story. This is just another thing I chalk up to just my perceptions though.
These are just the few things I can pull out of the air and I'm sorry I can't nail down a specific chapter or scene to point to, but reading the whole thing just feels wrong to me. I read the whole thing because I could not narrow down why this story bugged me and because I was determined to get the whole experience. After all, 247 peeps say this rocks, so I am obviously just wrong, but it is my honest opinion.
This story took me about two days to finish, and I really enjoy this story. Not sure if I can say it's my favorite fanfic or the best fanfic ever, but it's well done. I can't wait to see what happens next.
248905 Luckily magic makes normally terrifying tasks super easy
249359 No, you're not wrong because you have a different opinion, and I do appreciate the explanation. My frustration with your first post was that it didn't tell me what was wrong, not that you didn't like it. I don't intend to make any changes based on these ideas, as that would involve changing the very things that most people have insisted that I add, but it's still nice to know. I hope my explanation lets you see the logic behind writing it as it is.
I'm not certain of your judgement that the 'good guys' have no way to win. Think about it. Helios has fled Equestria under the realization that he can't take on Luna on his own. In desperation, he collapsed the ruin around the portal, counting on them taking a significant amount of time to uncover it, a gamble that is as likely to loose as win. Because he is having to speed up plans and get things ready faster than he anticipated, he has been forced to leave the portal ruins under the watchful eye of his unstable and unreliable minions who are as likely to kill each other or burn the whole thing down as they are to do something right. Meanwhile, he tries to resurrect Selene, but even if he succeeds, his gamble relies on Selene being comfortable with him having sacrificed Celestia to bring her back and her not deciding to kick his ass rather than invade Equestria with him. On top of this, he is unaware that the 'team b' still exists and is now fully capable of wielding the elements. Oh, and he left Spike in the hands of non-conditioned ponies, falsely believing they had no doubts in him.
The only reason that Helios did so well to begin with was that those that woke him gave him a run down of what had happened so far in the time loop, which is why he had no doubts; as soon as he was no longer able to predict what would happen next, things started to fall through. Actually, anyone who has been paying attention will already know how the mane6 will be rescued and how the conditioned ponies will be fixed. In that respect, I have completely failed as a better story really ~would~ make you think there was no way to win until it surprises you at the last moment.
And yes, Helios is a terrible villain. He's suppose to be; that's the joke. He's never done this sort of thing before and is not playing with a full deck on top of that. In fact, technically speaking he's ~not~ a villain; his actions are completely justified given the information he has and the fact that 1000 years of unjust torment has damaged his brain. He isn't the stereotypical 'sealed evil in a can'; he's a more complex character than that who honestly believes he's doing the right thing; that is why people feel for him. They feel for the G1 ponies because they took drastic actions to protect their families that they now regret during the brief moments of clarity that they have. The real villains are the ones that unjustly imprisoned Helios 1000 years ago and demanded he be forgotten, causing the destruction of Dream Valley in the process.
As for the canon characters like Trixie and Gilda? Yes, they are a bit off. Unfortunately, they only appear in one episode which leaves large portions of their personalities a large blank slate that has to be filled. Trixie for example; all her actions occurred while she was trying to put on a show for a crowd. Is that how she acts normally? Probably not. Does Gilda always act like a jerk when she's not feeling protective of the friend she hasn't seen in ages? Probably not. The other mane6 haven't really gotten to do much, and when they have it's been in an environment that you've never seen them face in the show and never will, so we really don't know how they'd act.
249489 That part was actually written prior to Skyrim being released; don't think I'm not tempted to go back and add it in. Though with the Royal Canterlot Voice, I think every other thing that Luna says is a Fus Ro Dah.
249564 Well if everyone said it was the best ever, I'd start wondering if you had all been conditioned. I just hope I end it well; I think at present I've re-written the same segment of the last chapter like five times in a row cause I didn't think it was quite right. I may have a pony-style breakdown
Okay, so I was looking around the internet, to see what stories I hadn't read yet. Then I see this one and think; 'Hmm, I liked this one, but it hasn't updated in forever. Oh well, I guess I'll just read it again.' Then suddenly, WHAM. Updated. Keep it up. This is a great story, and I don't want to have to wait so long for it to update again.
>Makes an awesome fic
>Makes a Monty Python reference
Marry me. Do it now.
246916 Did she, though? I mean...It seems that a few chapters ago, Helios noticed she wasn't that well conditioned like the others. So maybe evil Posey is lying about that time to...to...
...huh. Why WOULD she do that? Oh well. Let's hope that when she gets there, Pinkie is not ironically cupcake'd by Posey.
250066 Yes the next chapter is done and just needs editing and the last chapter after is over half way done, so no long wait I hope.
250114 Space-Pinkie is not someone I would say no to
250290 Basically she came up with the method of tricking Twilight in an effort to prove that she was properly conditioned.
252857
It's actually Commander Pinkie Shepard from Mass Effect, but since I love you I'll let it slide.
AGGHHHH THE CLIFFHANGERS! I HATE CLIFFHANGERS THE SUSPENCE IS KILLING MEEE!!!
Nice story BTW
An interesting story. I have no idea how you made me start shipping Gilda/Ditzy (Derpy) but you have.
I do think you might have gone a little overboard on the violence at points, but it works. You've managed to create a villain with a sympathetic backstory who is still a villain, if only because in his madness he uses terrible methods (and because his brainwashing creates minions even worse than he is, in an example of how he doesn't think things through).
One thing you should consider, however, is working in more descriptive text with your OCs. Their personalities are well-enough developed to tell them apart, even with similar names, but I found myself constantly having to go back to the scene in which they appeared when I wanted to keep straight which one was which color. Of course, since it's fanfiction, such things are less required of the main cast, which the audience will already be familiar with. You did a better job reminding us what the G1 ponies looked like (which is actually kind of odd, since I'd expect you to have the same problem with both).
253166 This:
253241 Pinkie with guns?
253467 Only one more cliffhanger til the end!
Unless I'm especially evil and end it with a cliffhanger! *Flutterlaugh*
253816 It's not my favorite ship, but I wanted to choose relationships that would make sense based on events in this story and that weren't the typical ships. Gilda and Rainbow are a ship I love, but I decided to lampshade it by making Gilda be mistaken about Rainbow's preference and then go with Derpy. Of course Derpy usually goes with Doctor Whooves, who does exist in this story's universe and which is so very adorable, but I like him being clueless about relationships as he so often is in Doctor Who. Trixie and Blinkie I thought went great together because of a common love for theatrical explosions. Of course Trixie flirted with Helios, but that was her being attracted to his power more than him. As for Pinkie, I just hope she doesn't get too angry at me not shipping her in this story. I'm severely tempted to write a single-chapter shipping (or possibly even clop) fic based in the same universe as this one, but we'll see. I doubt I could get as many high ratings on something like that.
Did I just write all that about shipping? I am so unbalanced :P
Yes, the violence did go out of whack, mainly I think because this story's original outline was a lot darker and edgier than it turned out, and not all of those situations got cartoonified in the final pass. In hindsight I should have chosen one and stuck with it. Character descriptions may have been a weak point too, and while I'm too lazy to go back and do that with this story, it's something I'll likely be watching in future stories. I was a bit more careful with the G1's in that I figured most readers wouldn't know them, while also trying to add details that G1 fans would get. The only real OC's in the story are Helios and Selene and maybe individual guards; maybe I should have taken more time on individual guards, but there were just so many of them
Having multiple characters named the same thing was a real pain. I gave Twilight Wish her last name based on how she cast spells in G1, though they never gave her a last name, but Applejack and Spike didn't lend themselves to anything so obvious after watching their G1's.
255899
Ah, I could have been clearer. The extent of my Gilda/Derpy shipping is entirely confined to this story. It works and I want to see it develop because of the specific sequence of events and style of characterization here that I don't expect to see repeated. I'm not going to go look for it.
Trixie/Blinkie also works, though it's less developed at the moment. On the Trixie note, I've long theorized she used actual fireworks to conserve magic, since despite being quite skilled she's not the ridiculous dynamo of power Twilight Sparkle is.
Well, not all the violence needed to be completely cartoonified, but there are some parts (like Suprise trying to kill Twilight when she's chained up) that are a bit too dark for the piece in my opinion. You're right that its basically an issue with the work having two moods. I think the slightly lighter one works better, but in no way espouse removing all the darkness. It doesn't have to all be Helios chasing people with water balloons. Well, I suppose you got my point the first time.
Another area I should have been clearer, while they are not, I suppose, technically OCs, the ones I needed the color reminders on most were Blinkie and Inkie. Because I know what they look like but which personality and abilities goes with which is not ingrained in my mind the way the canon characters are. Mostly because the personalities, abilities, and even names (although, yes, I get the Pac-man reference) were basically created out of whole cloth by you. They are in effect, OCs, even if Pinkie having two sisters is canon.
Well, now I have to kill Posey. *picks up stabby knife* This little pony went to market... properly butchered... hee heee heeee HEEE HEEE HEEE!!
249916 Nah, I don't feel bad for Helios. He's a bad guy. Bad guy = target for nuke! I like to take the the easiest and most efficient path to solving a problem: Beat it until it can't move, then beat it some more. >:3
It's also the 'fun' way of problem solving! *grumbles at the lack of an evil pony emoticon*
And the correspondences are revealed! Gilda is Honesty, Ditzy is Kindness, Pinkie is (still) Laughter, Blinkie is Generosity, Inkie is Loyalty, and Trixie is Magic. (Was there ever any doubt?)
257182 Your new icon frightens me, but also reminds me of Alucard's true form which is awesome.
Gilda and Derpy really do only work in certain situations. Trixie and Blinkie both keep others at a distance for various reasons, so would probably take further stories to develope them together.
I think I understand what you were saying; I think I just never decided properly how dark I wanted to be. I need to be more careful about that
To be fair, Blinkie and Inkie are not entirely my creations. The Pie family names (siters Blinkie and Inkie and parents Clyde and Sue) are fandom choices, and Blinkie and Inkie's personalities was based on how they are roleplayed on Equestria Dawn mush, with changes made to take into account for this being a different reality than that. In fact, the in-roleplay arrival of Blinkie Pie into our Ponyville there via exploding balloon might have been the first inspiration for making this story. At first it was just going to be something involving the Pie sisters, but sorta grew as an idea from there.
260693 I'm not sure I could ever stabby a cute pony, even an evil one! Maybe if we mushed up her mane a bit and gave her a goatee first. I think you and Blinkie Pie might get along well though. You have similiar views on justice
263877
Thanks. I just decided there was nothing better to represent presence over the internet than staring eyes.
Right, this story and any sequels have diverged sufficiently from canon, but in ways the audience can easily follow, that they create things that work only within this continuity. The fact they still work at all rather than feeling jarring is a sign of quality.
Well, no matter how inaccurate my terminology was, the fact that people who have watched the show and not played the Mush need more descriptive work with those two, stands. And that's probably a pretty large percent of your audience. For that matter, even if it isn't, it's bad form to require familiarity for the reader.
Hmm, Tracking. Also, one of the few competent Bluebloods I've seen in the fanfics I've read.
I didn't notice the pattern until Diggy Gem showed up. You really must be doing something right.
Also damn, Posey, you're good at this.
Oh, and... Spike!
Spike routinely gets the shaft in big epic stories (left behind for Elements of Harmony, Dragonshy, Return of Harmony, The Last Roundup, not to mention fanfic). It's nice to see him getting set up to play a pivotal role for once.
Plus G1 Spike is the only character I've had enough exposure to source material to care about. I watched a PMV once that used clips from Midnight Castle as well as Mare in the Moon/Elements of Harmony, and there was literally one clip, a shot of Spike standing beside a fallen figure and shaking him gently with this "oh no please wake up" look...
"A hero's not afraid to give his life
A hero's gonna save me- just in time..."
...“Please, your Majesty,” Prince Blueblood’s tone did gain a certain amount of respect as well, perhaps not wanting to push his luck, “I think it would be better if I stayed here to help you; after all, at this rate I’ll be the one raising the sun tomorrow.”...
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Aha! I knew Posey wasn't okay. Just Helios. Helios is cool. Helios can totally consider himself my bro.
Not that Helios is likely to want to, but y'know. The offer's out there.
Blinkie's trial seemed a bit blatant, though apparently not enough for her to catch on. And Trixie's I'm not so sure about either, though of course there's a fair amount of uncertainty as to what a proper test for the bearer of Magic is.
So Posey is from SHED.MOV, eh?
It's always the quiet ones.