You are Aufpasser Anonymous of the Federation of the Ever Free, and fuck do you want a nap.
It has been about two months since the griffins arrived. The renovations are complete and the castle fully staffed by an adequate, if occasionally quite gruff staff of griffins. All of the old regime's regalia has been removed in favor of banners bearing your own personal standard.
Where once Solar and Lunar banners flew tattered and disheveled, the Golden Boughs of Ever Free waved proudly in the breeze. You had even been nice enough to have most of their old regalia and the like delivered back to them.
The structure itself is no longer in danger of collapsing at any moment. Aside from a few stained-glass windows here and there you decided were not worth replacing, for the time being, everything is ship-shape.
The Griffins, true to their word, have sent a second wave of settlers in the following months, who have settled in around the castle grounds to form the newly founded Village of Greenfeather, with a bustling population of about fifty and as word spreads through the griffin lands of your swift progress, You actually currently find yourself in talks with local leaders to annex small portions of the Griffin Empire to expedite getting more of the feisty feathered folks under your jurisdiction, with more of them coming forth with similar requests every day.
As much as you don’t want to take on even more work, you can’t just let these sad lost, sassy birbs muck about pitifully in their own self-inflicted squalor if you can help them. And as much as they like to gripe and moan, having a leader who wants to improve their living conditions seems to have given them a bit of that old Pre-Guto spark back.
You currently sit in what was formerly the throne room of the newly Dubbed Nameless Castle, perched on a simple but very comfortable office chair, behind a fairly nice desk. The desk is Mahogany, very fine material, very expensive. Or it would be if you did not live in an actual forest.
You find yourself listening to a report from Gallus, who you have dubbed your Beobachter of Internal Affairs. Which considering the scope of your current population mostly entails informing you of pending repairs, new structures and roads being erected and planned, and the general goings-on in your neck of the woods, pun intended.
“Construction of the wall surrounding the village is going pretty alright, some nerd told me it should be finished by the end of summer.” The little twink borb said with a small shrug as he eyed you somewhat casually, lazily even. “Zecora wrote back yesterday and said she would be down to integrate into Federal Territory to take that advisory position, and accepted your proposal of…” he pulled what you presume to be the letter in question from out of a saddlebag. “Unlimited Z-word pass in exchange for perpetual tax exemption.”
You smile wider at this, rubbing your hands together as you motion for him to hand you the letter. He rolls his eyes and does so, and you quickly open a drawer and squirrel the evidence of your newfound immense power away in a folder for later. “Excellent work, Gallus, and what of Captain Gilda? How goes the ongoing training of the Ever Free Rangers?”
“It goes just fine, you big pink dweeb.” A somewhat harsh female voice sounds out as the griffin girl in question popped her way into your meeting room, sporting a green vest and beret sporting the Golden Boughs “Everyone seems to be getting used to flying in the forest pretty quickly. But what else can you expect with a bad to the bone babe like me at the helm.” She said, puffing out her chest a bit and looking quite pleased with herself. You had been right in your assumption it seemed. Giving her a position where she could bark out orders and point out other people's or er, griffin's shortcomings all day had really brought out her good qualities.
“Excellent work, Captain. Proceed with normal patrols as scheduled but please make sure that extra forces are deployed routinely to protect the workers at the unfinished portions of the wall. A lot of nasty customers out here after all. I’d hate for one of them to get what they came for.”
“Ych, don’t tell me how to do my job, lame-o.” She said as she turned her beak up at you and walked away. Her tail swaying in a catlike manner which belied her actual pleasure at the praise as she stalked off. You smile softly and wave her off before turning your attention back to Gallus. “Anything else I should know about?”
“Huh? Oh yeah, some blonde pony with fucked up eyes brought you this letter, seems pretty important,” he said as he pulled out an envelope featuring the seal of the Equestrian Crown.
Your eyes widen as you reach across your desk and snatch it right out of his claw, garnering a surprising squawk from them. “Well shit Gallus, lead with that next time!” you said as you quickly opened the envelope and pulled the letter out, reading it.
Anonymous,
I hope that this letter finds you well. I once again apologize for the conduct of Princess Luna at our last meeting. Though I suppose considering your current position you do not consider it something requiring an apology. Knowing you, you probably found it incredibly funny.
I would also like to thank you on behalf of the sisters for returning the bulk of the relics myself and my friends cataloged during our own visit to the castle, which as I have been quite sternly informed by several lawyers, did not constitute a substantial claim to the grounds due to the unofficial and brief nature of our visitation and a lack of distinct purposeful claim to ownership at the time of said visitation. Under I.S.B.A. Guidelines. Celestia seemed quite pleased with the offering, while Luna seemed...less than thrilled when she found a griffin feather in one of the boxes. Fortunately, with the aid of several doses of muscle relaxant, Celestia and several medical professionals were able to dissuade her from an immediate declaration of war.
In any case, I wished to inform you that Myself, Princess Celestia, and yes, Princess Luna will be making a trip out to Greenfeather to have a meeting with you in regards to several key resources the crown wishes to negotiate with you in regards to gaining continued access to in the face of your newfound ownership. We will be arriving this afternoon and are eager to get this all settled and out of the way.
Warmest Regards from your friend, Princess Twilight Sparkle.
P.S. - I have to admit, the way you got one over on Luna was kind of funny.
You smirk and pump your fist, pleased with the closer of the letter before your eyes go wide and realization strikes. “Ah fuck! They’ll be here in a few hours! Gallus, go tell Gustave to get his ass in gear and get some cake ready for Sunbutt and let Gilda know we should be expecting guests at the gate. I’ll round up a posse to roll out the welcome wagon.” You say clapping your hands as you bolt out of your chair, the two of you scattering with Gallus giving a disgruntled “ugh.” as he scampers off and you see to it that you at least give the appearance of having prepared for your guests' arrivals properly.
You smile deviously to yourself, rubbing your hands together as you make your way down the hall. On the bright side. This did give you the opportunity to do your second favorite activity aside from, doing nothing: dunking on royalty. Now, where did you put that thing…
This story gets better and better.
10881620
I agree.
Long live the Federation! And to the continued rule of Anon the Chad!
Don't forget that the desk is nigh indestructible and can bend the fabric of the universe itself.
...Oh. So it''s not the special blood ritual-treated Malchior Fire-Breathing Mahogany then. Never mind.
(Ooooh, I'm liking these fancy names! And Federation of the Ever Free? A-grade there, a lovely sounding name! I do question if it's really a federation, or a dictatorship, but having a desk instead of a throne room does make me think that Anon's approaching things from a more honest direction.
Also Greenfeather village, very cool, Ever Free Rangers is also awesome sounding, and fancy new title for the birb boy, more awesome non-traditional title giving for a new society, very nice!
The only name I'm not liking so far is Dubbed Nameless Castle... yeah, not gonna lie, not really to my taste there.
Annnnd here come the diplomats! Plus Luna! Who has the power to screw things up royally! ... ... Yeah, and Anon's probably not going to actually help there... well, at least Twilight is still friendly, and I hope he and her get some legitimate friendly friend time!
In any case, things seem to be going pretty well so far! ... We'll see how the whole 'diplomacy' thing goes though.)
10881649
Nameless Castle is a bit of a Joke about anon not having a name, lol. glad you are enjoying!
Keep up the good work.
Honestly surprised that Discord hasn't showed up yet. Would have expected him to be watching as Anon plays Rock-Paper-Scissors with Luna over a land dispute.
Wonder if the Diarchs and co will bring along an impressive honor guard. And how much will they be mocked by the griffins either way.
Damn it, 10881644 beat me to ’cause I wasted more than a quarter of an hour looking for one without extra material. I did find this though.
10881672
Celestia and luna show up with a whole squad and Luna mocks him because he has no guards
anon: oh yes I do. -whistles a bird call, every tree within fifty meters shakes and bird calls back-
Luna: :|
... i await in anticipation
I need to write a program for converting text from 2nd person to 3rd or 1st person
10880696
Like just a full on kingdom that's whole principle is simply being fundamentally better than the rest of the world out of spite for most of its leaders. Hilarious as an idea, just imagine, "Yea, we did all that friendship stuff WITHOUT the stupidity in between."
10881675
Luna: What are a bunch of birds going to do against the might of the ROYAL GUARD!!
Anon: Let's out another higher pitched whistle
The sound of crossbows can be heard and the glint of bolt heads can be seen leveled at the diarchs
Luna: :|
10881675
Oh, Merry Men!~
Something something shrek
Love how every chapter he changes his title.
Awesome
10881674
Fuck you! You beat me to it!
10881669
I think Discord realizes that Anon, Duke of Chaos doesn't need his help here and is well aware that he's got this one covered, instead he's just kicking back with some popcorn just watching the chaotic magic unfold like a proud parent
but yeah he was probably doubled over with laughter at the epic gamer move Anon pulled on Luna when he got the news
Please annex us Anonymous senpai~!
10881676
A replica of The Penetrator from Saints Row which he claims to be his Royal Sceptre.
Or perhaps, more subtle, a tee-shirt with pictures of a rock, a piece of paper and a pair of scissors.
i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/759/171/9d1.gif
10881774
Fair enough. That can be a thing. Guess we'll just have to wait.
I am loving this story, very excited to see where it goes. Keep up the good work!
10881674
Oh my Gomikai, just how many TFS fans can one comment section hold?
10881674
Well, there's this one I made about half a year ago if you want no extra material...
10881835
Ha ha ha ha ha ha!
What's so funny?!
Your shirt!
*growls*
I wonder if Luna will attempt an assassination? Then again, everybody gangsta till the trees start speaking Griffish.
I’d have kept them for a museum to be built in the country, but that’s just me. I’d have also flaunted the fact that they were mine and not hers in Lunas face.
What’d he keep that’s gonna piss Luna off?
You know you did good when even Twilight says your stunt was funny. Wonder if Anon has a painting of the moment hanging around just to admire it...and with the coming delegation, some trolling too.
Also, yay for Zecora joining the Federation!
is it just luna who will come ore just the friendship gang. if its just luna, celestia troll's again ore has enough of her sisters shit.
i mean really she had to be put under because of a feather -.-
wave
Gallus
close? closure?
Gallus
Curious to see what other creatures will wind up as part of the village. First guess would be Diamond Dogs and Changelings ofc, but looking forward to where this story goes regardless.
i.ytimg.com/vi/fV1w11DH56Q/maxresdefault.jpg
why gallus like idk LAZY or something.....?
Shouldn't Celly be wise enough to avoid bringing her sister to the meeting, given the precedents?
No, seriously. At this point Luna and Anon are pretty much Sodium and water respectively; you don't get them closer unless you want to see the explosion.
10881958
also with how she is she would likely declare war while in the castel then get immediatly detained
Next up, Lord Farquad Anonymous?
Said like Mrs Hyacinth Boquet?
As long as he doesnt go for Fruitcake, he might get away with leaving the place standing?
At least, dont cover in in white icing. Thats going Idol. Billy, not Hooves.
10881883
It'll probably start with races that will will be tongue in cheek insulting or funny. Griffons first, cuz they started a war trying to steal that land, specifically. It's ironic that they're the new developers, citizens, and military. Considering changelings went to war with Equestria (kinda) and have no designated homeland, they're totally next.
Anon will probably get labelled as a hostile power (considering griffons) and get closed off from Equestria (or, at least access to resources or skills, due to shenanigan's or bureaucratic bs) and only get access to technological advancements from corporate espionage. Changelings will totally use that skillset to negotiate citizenship.
10881993
Don't forget he could go full Australia and bring in some criminal types too depending on where this fic is in the time line. We could see glimglam or tempest show up.
10881669
Just because you can't see him does not mean that he's not there.
10881819
I guess but she never bothered with it once since the nightmare moon incident and in fact the only pony who goes near it is twilight and friends usually helping twilight with something involving magic.
Nothing can go wrong!
Will Tartarus be on that list?
Does he have a crown? All monarchs need a crown. And he's a monarch even if he doesn't think he is.
10881783
awesome
This is just getting better with each chapter.
10882055
It should be a crown of golden laurel leafs. Like the roman emperors wore
Hey wait doesn't Fluttershy live right on the edge of the Forrest? Does her house fall under his jurisdiction?
10882201
Flutts actually lives near the white tail woods iirc
Was thinking of this earlier. The fact that Twilight and Friends at one point were doing repairs to the Castle and maintaining the paths and I would think at one point fixing the rope bridge might be considered the town of Ponyville doing mantaince on the territory. Plus they were paying taxes upon that territory as well.
10880696
Assuming Anonymous doesn't wind up in a protracted seige, or just reach the point where he can curbstomp anyone outside the Alicorns themselves?
My personal guess is that he and The Storm King become bros, so they can dish back and forth about how lame ponies can be.