Lazuli is just another slave, one of many in the Crystal Empire. Her king keeps her fellow ponies safe from a dangerous foe, or so it seems. Yet, her treasonous thoughts refuse to lie, and there's only one other she can turn to for one last talk.
"Gather ye rosebuds while ye may, Old Time is still a-flying, And this same flower that smiles today, Tomorrow will be dying."
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This is beautiful. Very well-written, creative, and a shocking look at what life was like for the crystal ponies under the rule of King Sombra. I really found myself sympathizing with your main character. I saw that this story is marked as incomplete, and I really want to find out what happens next.
Well, that was a nice read.
Keep up the good work.
Dolomite!!??
2030505 Yep. I put in hints as to what exactly he does with them, and there's a bit more history behind Lazuli's reaction to "cocoons" that'll be revealed in time.
2030542 Thank you for the compliments! I'm editing the second chapter at the moment. Give it a week; two weeks tops.
2030612 Thank you!
2030955 That was a reference to the cushion cut, which is an actual cut of gemstone. I think I was trying too hard there, though, so I've corrected it. Thanks for pointing it out.
2031008 Not that kind of Dolomite.
Thank you all for the great feedback. It's very encouraging for me as a writer to see people enjoying my work.
I really like seeing a new idea like this. I look forward to you continuing this story.
Interesting.
Liked and Faved.
I think this should be pried or prised, unless she really liked that floorboard.
Wait, Sombre?
Again with the prized...
Sorry about that, but I'm a semi-professional grammar nazi with a bit of OCD mixed in
This story was really great. I like how the flugel horn turned into a weapon against the changelings. I like how she seemed brainwashed the entire time, like she was a little too calm, despite an attack that had just occurred. But what I liked the most was the idea that they actually craft more of their own kin out of crystals. It makes sense, in a way, that a crystal pony would be made of actual crystal. Kudos on the great story, and I can't wait for more of it!
2033639 and 2034328
Thank you for your encouraging comments! I'm glad you enjoyed my work .
2052645
No need to apologize at all. In fact, I cannot thank you enough for correcting me in such good time. This story is my submission for a competition, the deadline of which is later today.
Being a grammar nazi myself, I would rather have such faults pointed out to me than let them slip under the radar. Since "Cadence" and "Cadance" could be spelled either way, I didn't think there was an official spelling for Sombra's name, and just assumed that "Sombre" was an acceptable alternative. In case I'm wrong, I've taken your advice and changed it.
Also, thanks for the feedback!
Hm. That was a very interesting start. I'm looking forward to more.
Whoa. I have written a few stories on Sombra, but nothing like this...can't wait for the next part, but take your time. I know youknow but perfection is so worth it. I learned that the hard way in Loyal as a Dragon.
This thing is... let's see... over five and a half years overdue for an update. It pains me to admit as much, but I'm not going anywhere with this fic anytime soon.
So to clear things up: As of now, I'm setting the status of this fic to cancelled. I'll remove the status only if I ever actually come back to continue it.