Jade paced back and forth worriedly on the third floor of Uncle's shop. Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo watched carefully as she paced, their own expressions reflecting similar anxiety. Audrey III hung from the ceiling, completely relaxed. Finally, Jade exploded. "I can't believe it! How did those idiots beat us so badly that we needed magic government backup...and how did that backup get beaten so badly?"
"The baddies ain't as goofy as they seem," Apple Bloom offered. "Tohru told me a bit about 'em...they wouldn't be so high ranked in Valmont's organization if they didn' have talent."
"And Valmont wouldn't be in charge of a criminal syndicate that Section 13 can't take down despite knowing who's in charge if he were incompetent," Sweetie Belle adds. "Plainly, he took the time to plan out Talisman power combinations before handing them out."
"Well of course he did!" Scootaloo pointed out. "You really think an international crime organization is going to flick magical Talismans out to a bunch of goofballs at random and hope magic will fix all his problems?"
Audrey glanced in a seemingly random direction with a wide grin.
"Well what are we supposed to do?" Jade demanded worriedly. "We're dealing with competent foes using Talisman power. And either Jackie's going to go charging in unprepared, or stay out of it because it's 'not our problem'! But if someone doesn't stop Valmont and get the Talismans back, he could end up running the world!"
"Well what can we do about it?" Sweetie Belle demanded. "Our shared special talent is in Demon Hunting, not crime hunting or problem solving."
"Yeah!" Scootaloo agreed. "It's not like you can just throw a 'destiny' problem at us and we'll magically come up with a solution!"
Audrey's seemingly undirected grin widened.
"Well you're all I've got!" Jade gasped out at last, slumping in on herself. "If I talk with Jackie about this, he'll tell me it's not my business to worry about all this. If I talk to Uncle, he'll say Jackie can handle it. Tohru won't go against Uncle." She wrapped her arms around her legs. "I...I don't want to see Jackie get hurt..."
The three fillies cuddled up around her. "We dun wanna see that, neither," Apple Bloom agreed.
"But what can we do?" Scootaloo asked softly. "We're just kids. Even with our magic stable, we don't know what to do with half of it."
"It's not like we know a couple people tough enough to take care of themselves, familiar with Talisman magic, and willing to take our calls and drop everything to help us!" Sweetie complained. She then noticed everyone staring at her. "...what?"
Jade chuckled. "Sweetie Belle, you're a genius!"
"And here I thought she was a dictionary," Scootaloo joked.
"Just because I like knowing what I'm talking about-"
Jade quickly tuned out that conversation as she raced for the phone. She had a couple of calls to make.
Uncle worked calmly cleaning the shop. While nothing untoward had happened since Jackie's abortive attempt to fight the Dark Hand, he'd been on edge ever since. Having caught sight of Jackie incorporating his sword into his katas, he knew he wasn't the only one. He just wished he knew something that could tell him what he could do to fix whatever had gone wrong to create this situation.
As he thought this, he heard the bell at the front of the shop ring. "Go away!" he called out as he turned towards the pair of shadowed figures. "We are closed!"
The larger figure stepped out of the shadows, revealing a well fitting suit and a crimson mask. "We are not...customers," he stated ominously.
Uncle's eyes went wide. "JACKIE!" he screamed out. "We have a burglar!"
Jackie leapt out of the dojo on the second floor, sword drawn and chest bared, the 'mystic armor' runes inexpertly applied, giving him a bit of a 'wild man' appearance that made the masked figure flinch back in shock. However, at the sight of the figure, Jackie's face softened and he lowered the sword. "Uncle, he is not a burglar-"
Uncle promptly struck Jackie across the temple. "Of course he is a burglar! He is wearing a mask!"
A small Mexican boy stepped out of the shadows. "No, no, no, El Toro Fuerte never removes his mask," he proclaimed proudly, as though that explained everything.
Uncle frowned as something niggled his memory. Something about Sweetie Belle's hobbies and interests...
His thoughts were dashed as Tohru stepped out of the backroom, looking around in concern. As soon as the masked figure - 'El Toro Fuerte', apparently - caught sight of him, his expression hardened. "Dark Hand enemy!" he proclaimed, shifting into an angry crouch. Before he could leap, however, thorny vines shot out of alcoves in the walls to wrap around him, holding him to the ground. "Evil plant?" he gasped in shock.
"Audrey is not evil," Tohru stated firmly. "He is Apple Bloom's familiar...and apparently has little patience for comedic misunderstandings that cause fiscal collateral damage. I no longer work for the Dark Hand, and am firmly allied with this family."
"It's true!" Jackie confirmed.
El Toro relaxed, and the vines released him. "Apologies," he offered sincerely as he straightened his tie. "I was not informed of this."
Tohru nodded his head. "Apology accepted."
"Perhaps we can meet in the ring sometime, since we are now allies?" El Toro added hopefully.
"I look forward to it," Tohru agreed warmly.
"Looks like a real friendly reunion here," a young woman in a pink dress said as she stepped out from behind Jackie.
Jackie leapt in shock with a loud, "WUAAAGH!" After patting his chest for a time, he glowered at the woman. "Viper! What are you doing here?"
"Who'll save the day?" Audrey suddenly sang out. "The Superhero Squad! They'll hero up...AGAIN!"
"I think the plant summed it up nicely," Viper responded warmly, a chuckle in her voice.
"Aiyah..." Jackie groaned, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Jade reads too many comic books..."
"It's a good thing I'm here, though," Viper spoke up. "I found out from my contacts in the magical community that Valmont's been in contact with a Dark Chi Wizard named Daolong Wong, who was last seen in Tibet. Not long after the contact, Valmont's Enforcers booked a flight there."
"Then we know where we are going," Tohru stated firmly.
Jackie opened his mouth to argue, then closed it. "Even if I try to tell you all not to come and Tohru to stay and watch the shop and the children, you'll all end up coming anyway, won't you?"
"Isn't it adorable the way he thinks he's in charge?" Viper teased playfully, making El Toro chuckle.
Jackie buried his face in his free hand. "Bad day..."
"By the way, Jackie, I like the new look," Viper added, looking him up and down and playfully licking her lips.
Jackie glanced down, realized he was shirtless, and let out a startled yelp. "Bad day bad day bad day!" he cried out as he raced up the stairs.
Audrey is starting to remind me of Pinkie... and I'm not sure that's a good thing...
Jackie has an attractive woman flirting with him and he runs away? Dude!
Oh god... He knows.
Ah, so are we actually gonna push this ship this time? Considering that Dante hooked up with Lady I wouldn't doubt it.
7944510 Audrey must be the equivalent of Pinkie in that world.
wait where's Paco? where El Toro goes that boy is not far behind.
Also missing for various reasons
Super Moose
Pig and Rooster (Of course those two wouldn't be there as the they haven't broken yet....)
7944524 If you're talking PWNYverse Dante, he married Lady, not Trish.
7944526
Gee, I wonder?
7944526
I think Paco just hasn't been properly introduced yet.
Hah!
Wau, Jackie. Never thought you'd become a playboy
I recognize that reference. That would be "Who'll save the day".
What was audrey grinning about before, anyway?
Have fun chasing geese in Tibet!
7944611
I'll give you a hint:
Good grief, we have a leafy green Pinkie Pie now. And yay El Toro Fuerte and Viper!
Well Jackie certainly drew Viper's attention to his chest.
Guess El Toro didn't get the memo through the grape vine.
Seems Uncle didn't unmask the identity of his first visitor.
Well, like I said, this time around Jackie = Spike, Captain Black = Celestia
Does this mean
Viper = Ember?
Toro = Shining Armor?
Oh & Jackie
1 It's going to get FAR worse before it gets better
2 Who says it's going to get better?
3 You ain't the only one who can have a bad day
The Elements stoned Discord (twice) but reformed Luna -after sending her to the moon for 1000 years. Look forward to what they do to Dao
While the hero squads is fighting the villians, the CMCs do the demon hunting . . . sound like a plan.
I ship it. Though Jackie might be a bit of a hard sell.
Jackie, jackie, jackie. Viper likes you, pretty sure you like her, just take her on a dayte, see where it goes.
A surprise Uncle did not say anything about Daolong Wong
The power of the flirting compels you, Jackie.
7944778
That's the beauty of Fanfiction, doesn't matter what he'd want in the show we can make him do ANYTHING! And Damn right they should date, I'm with Jade, She Would make a HELL of an aunt.
So do the runes need to be applied to the skin, or can they be sewn into a shirt or vest and work just as well?
Because if the former:
Yeah, that's gonna keep happening, Jackie. And God help you if you have to do that in colder environs...
Jackie, common man, Viper won't bite... yet.
7944536 Right, right, that's what I meant to write. I saw the face correctly, but wrote the wrong name. Total brainfart. Gonna edit right now.
7944989 I think you mean "hard".
I so totally ship this.
7945116 never thought of it, but definitely!
Best. Random. Reference. Ever.
Alright Squadies
TIME TO HERO UP!!!!
7944989 Unless he wants her too....
you could have done something awesome like avengers assembled, or a justice league dark refrence, why would you use super hero squad?
7944976
1) Needs to be applied to the skin.
2) Protects from environmental effects, too.
7945562
Because it has lyrics for Audrey to sing.
7945625
Well that's embarrassing...for him at least...
Excellent chapter. Any chance of seeing more of Viper and El Toro than in canon? I always thought it would have great if they helped in the adventures more.
Chapter Eighty Eight
"Aiyah!"
\
Chapter Count: 1
Total Count: 44
"One More Thing!"
Chapter Count: 0
Total Count: 75
Looks like Viper is ready to upgrade from being Jade and the fillies' 'friend' to 'Aunt'. And I approve, Jackie could use someone to snuggle up to at night who can keep up with him and yet won't be afraid to whap him on the head when he gets over protective.
Also, since magic is a thing in the world, I'm going to include a few DnD items I feel Viper should have for more versatility: Belt of Hidden Pouches, Rod of Ropes, Wand Bracer and Gauntlets of the Weapon Master
7944510 Me either....
7944512 With most of his life focusing on martial arts and archeology, I wouldn't be surprised if he never had a date and isn't used to girls flirting with him. Even more reason for Viper to end up with him so he can start a family of his own and make Jade an Aunt eventually.
7945625 still could have been earths mightiest hero's.
7945926
Don't know that one.
Besides, Audrey's song cues are supposed to be funny.
Viper definitely likes what she sees...Also, I just realized something: remember the episode with that blonde female thief with the whip pursuing that teleportation relic? Makes me wonder if Viper were to clash with her...
7944890 Same here. I was expecting him to go all "AIYAH!" upon hearing that name.
24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdy5fpiCaX1r06m1wo1_500.gif
7945379
7945663 What about the 'bad day's?
While you got rid a few comical scenes from the episode, you added new ones to take its place.
7945636 Maby Jakie should get them tattooed
This seems familiar...You read Exterminatus Now? Or just looked at the TvTropes page image for "Skilled, but Naive"?
I guess its time to HERO UP!!!!
sorry. couldn't help it.
7945926
7946210 And then there's this...
When there's trouble... you know who to call~! Chan Chasers!
Is Audrey a FWB? (Fourth Wall Breaker)
OMC ( Oh My Chaos)! Audrey is a FWB!
8773107
I want to know who he was dissing.
I like Viper. :D
9116234
He was dissing Valmont. In the original series, he just randomly assigned talismans and everyone on their side ended up no more useful than without them.