Sarge cracked his eyes open ever so slightly to see Applebloom slowly opening the door. Applebloom squeezed through the crack and backed up, closely followed by the other Cutie Mark Crusaders.
"What are you doing?" Sarge asked curiously, eyes still not visibly open.
Each of the girls let out a yelp and whipped their heads to Sarge. "Ah fergot ya slept in here." Applebloom said, heart still racing from the scare.
"Where else would I be sleeping?" Sarge said simply, now getting up and stretching. "So what are you doing in here so early?"
"We were just going to grab some rope and a piece of wood." Scootaloo answered.
"Do I even want to know what you'll be using it for?" Sarge asked with a raised brow.
"We were just going to set up a swing on one of the trees." Sweetie Belle said.
"Want to help?" Scootaloo asked.
"Sorry, putting a swing up sounds like a job that no man would want to do. Go get Simmons to help you."
"That’s okay, we'll just-" Sweetie Belle started to have Scootaloo put her hoof over Sweetie Belle's mouth.
"Gee Sarge, that sounds an awful lot like something Grif would say." Scootaloo said innocently.
Sarge immediately jumped into action, picking up a piece of wood. He walked straight towards Scootaloo, fixing her with a glare that would’ve put Fluttershy to shame. Scootaloo slowly backed away from Sarge until she had her back against the wall. She put her leg over her face defensively. After a few seconds Scootaloo lowered her leg and looked up at Sarge who was staring at her in confusion.
"What are you waiting for soldier?" Sarge grunted. "Let's get this show on the road."
"Ah go' t' rop'." Applebloom said with two long strands of rope in her mouth.
"Great!" Scootaloo said.
Sarge went to try to find a tree that was suitable for the swing. Once he found one, he bucked it, checking to see that it was stable enough. Applejack had come outside and watched them put the swing together in a matter of minutes from a distance.
"You four havin' fun?" Applejack asked after Applebloom hopped on the swing.
"We made a swing!" Applebloom said.
"Ah kin see that." Applejack smiled. "Sarge, think ya kin get one of th' others t' come on over here?"
"Why would I do that?"
"Well ah was just thinkin' about lettin' them decide on 'nother challenge we could do."
"Fine, I'll go get Grif. He's probably not doing anything anyways and it has been awhile since I physically harmed him."
"Yer a true inspiration Sarge." Applejack said with a smirk.
"I do try my hardest." Sarge said. "I'll be back in a couple minutes."
Sarge arrived at Fluttershy's cottage in a matter of minutes, and once he got to the door he stared at it. "Hey Dirtbag! Get out here I need to talk to you." Sarge said, knocking on the door.
Sarge stood by the door for a full minute before knocking on the door again. After he got no answer he tried to open the door just to find it to be locked.
"Dammit Grif get off your ass and get out here." Sarge yelled.
After receiving no reply he looked through the window to the main room to see that Grif was not on the couch. Sarge let out an annoyed moan and made his way to the back of the cottage to knock on the other door. As he rounded the corner he saw Fluttershy sleeping on the hammock with Angel and Grif laying against one of the trees with Haley curled up between his legs. Sarge walked up to Grif and stared at him quietly.
"It's almost enough to make me want to leave him be for once." Sarge murmured, turning around.
"Almost." Sarge proceeded to buck Grif in the side, causing him to scream in pain and fall sideways to the ground. Fluttershy's eyes snapped open and she shrieked loudly. Fluttershy attempted to jump out of the hammock but she just ended up cocooned inside of it instead.
"Son of a bitch!" Grif yelled, turning to Sarge. "What the fuck was that for?"
"You looked so peaceful I just had to do it." Sarge said sadistically. "Now come on, as much as it hurts me to say this I need your-"
"Help." Fluttershy squeaked.
Sarge went up to hammock and spun it once. It snapped back in to place and Fluttershy was clinging to the blanket for dear life. She slowly released her grip and slowly let herself back onto the ground, body trembling.
"Are you okay?" Grif asked.
"I-I think..." Fluttershy said, voice cracking.
Fluttershy burst into tears and ran inside her cottage and slammed the door shut.
"Wow Sarge, I knew you were an asshole, but even I have to say that that was too far even for you."
"I didn't mean to do it." Sarge grunted.
"You still did it though." Grif said turning towards the cottage.
Grif went up to the door and tried to open it to find it locked.
"Get out of the way." Sarge muttered, pushing Grif to the side.
Sarge knocked on the door loudly.
"Go away!" Fluttershy yelled.
"She never seemed like the over emotional type." Grif said sincerely. "I think you might have broke her."
"Shut it." Sarge said. Sarge turned to the door and knocked once again. "Can you come out here I need to tell you something."
"No, please g-go away." Fluttershy said.
"What are you planning on telling her?" Grif asked. "That you stomped on a bunch of bunnies on your way here?"
"No you idiot, I'm going to apologize." Sarge said flatly.
Grif ran to the door and started slamming on it.
"Fluttershy can you come out here for a second?" Grif asked in an unusually soft spoken voice.
"What are you doing?" Sarge asked.
"It's not everyday you hear one of Sarge’s fabled apologies. I really want to hear what one sounds like."
"Well if she isn't going to answer to me, why would you expect her to answer for y-"
The door slowly creaked open and Fluttershy looked through the crack, cheeks damp.
"What is it?" Fluttershy asked, voice barely audible.
"I just wanted to say, uh, sorry?" Sarge said unconvincingly.
"Well Sarge, that didn't sound forced at all." Grif said.
Sarge stared coldly at Grif and turned back to Fluttershy. "Listen, um, Fluttershy. I am sor-"
"Really." Grif said happily.
"Yes, thank you Grif." Sarge muttered sarcastically. "I am really sorry for making you cry. It won't happen again and I promise to take it easy on you from here on out."
Fluttershy sniffled and opened the door fully.
"Thank you for apologizing." Fluttershy said with a small smile.
"Glad that's over." Sarge said quickly, dragging Grif away. "Let's go Grif, we've got work to do."
First .
Here have some pics to celebrate, Group Photo with Two Secrets and my SSPTiotBB(Super Secret Project That Is On The Back Burner).
Inb4 York is best pony.
Sarge now has to watch when he physically abuses Griff...
76 chapters and I have finally made the first non-author comment... I feel complete now.
Wait... Sarge... Apologized?
WHAT KIND OF BACKWARDS WORLD IS THIS!?
Who has Sister called a cop in the past?
hammocks sound dangerous.
500786 Amazing work.
500887
They are. I had a rope hammock awhile back and my hand went between two of the ropes, then I fell off and it tore off some skin from my fingers.
500882
And damn. I hit the wrong button. iPhones suck sometimes. I meant the fact that the corner has meta on it. I didn't even think about wash. I also think that Tex on the Freelancer picture looks as badass as usual.
500898
Tex was the one I was least satisfied with.
You know, I don't care if Sarge apologized. I'm still gonna somehow kill him for making Fluttershy cry.
501624
No Applebloom was voiced by Morgan Freeman, god get it right.
Applejack was voiced by none other than Nolan North.
501859
Cowbells do
501904
That one with the cowbells did
501953
I was joking.
Wyoming is best pony.
Almost...
502862
I didn't like my Wyoming and I don't know why.
I just like the scars that I put on York.
Though I imagined Pony Meta with blood red eyes and an EVA helmet, he still looks like a BAWS
I was gonna do something productive today...
...but I bloody love these.
You are awesome, good sir. I love you.
504703
I love you too Mr person man
504707 And I love you morer, creator of amazing things.
504733
B-but I made you a cake. And let's be honest, this story is many things but amazing it is not.
501913 I truly did laugh at that
500786 Love the mustache :D
"..sounds like a job that no man would want to do. Go get Simmons to help you." all my lols
and the part where he woke Grif: That was perfectly funny, it's so "Sarge"
you..
made...
Fluttershy...
Cry...?
Dear Sarge:
fc04.deviantart.net/fs70/f/2012/227/1/1/you_made_fluttershy_cry_by_echosong101-d5b8sg3.jpg
Sincerely - The Interwebz
76 chapters done, 181 left, spent 9 hours strait I think I'm gonna hit the hay
2700502 and as i post this i realize that there are 257 chapters...so, i am at 76/257
2700502 screw your nine hours I have been working my ass off just to get enough time off to read this amazing story
More than 147 straight man hours
Dear god...
1367111 enmar....get my baseball bat cause im going to beat some sense into sarge for think before he does something like that in the future
1367111 Hello? did somebody call for a reaper??
6814176 That depends. You get that slothful soul dealt with?
1367111 hey sarge (hooves catch fire and slowly spreads over the rest of my body) they say the smoke better suffocate you first because being burned alive is one of the MOST PAINFUL THINGS a person can ever experience. But my flames are smokeless
8203922
Fun fact being burned alive isnt that painful. See by the time the fire starts to really burn, most if not all of your nerve endings are destroyed. Making the process of being burnd alive not completely painless, but slightly less painful than most think.
8789226
Actually what will kill you if you are being burned alive is the lack of oxygen. The fire will consume it near instantaneously therefore you will die from lack of air alone. Suffocating would imply obstruction in the lungs. Also if you were burned over your whole body, and survived, you would wish you were dead. Scar tissue does NOT stretch, and when you inhale, your chest expands. That scar tissue will prevent that, and thus you will not be able to breathe. That is actually the worst part.