"You're not going, Lyra!"
Bon Bon slammed her hoof against the floor, earth pony strength nearly shattering the hardwood, while the spearmint unicorn, nostrils flared and ears held plumb, attempted to set her on fire through sheer tyranny of will.
"Who the buck are you to decide that for me? I'm a grown mare, Bon Bon!"
The confectioner scoffed, rolling her eyes as she prodded Lyra's chest.
"Yeah, a grown mare obsessed with a show for little colts. When you're being all weird at home, fine, sure, whatever, I can tolerate it, but I'm not gonna let you make an ass of yourself in public like that!"
Lyra recoiled as if slapped across the face, before stomping forward with narrowed eyes.
"An ass of myself? What are you even talking about, it's just a Pinkie party!"
Bon Bon's chuckle came more from exasperation than humor.
"Oh, don't give me that crap. 'Wow, golly gee, there's a real human in town!' Seriously? I thought you were smarter than that. Watch, it'll end up being ... " She dismissively waggled a hoof. " ... I dunno, a humare orgy or something."
Lyra couldn't help but raise an eyebrow.
"An orgy at a Pinkie party."
Bon Bon gave her a deadpan glare in return.
"Heat Week 997."
Turning away with a blush, Lyra steadied herself with a shuddering breath.
"T-that ... ok, no, that doesn't count, it wasn't her fault. We both know that the pharmacist confused stimulants for suppressors."
Bon Bon pressed the attack.
"My point is that it'll be you, Pinkie Pie, and 20 of the sweatiest freaks in Ponyville, standing around and pretending that cartoon characters are real. Trust me on this, it's going to be a complete embarrassment, and ponies will think a hell of a lot less of you for going."
Before despair could inspire a rout, Lyra managed to rally her spiraling thoughts.
"But he is real! Look at the news, he just did an interview on CNN, for Celestia's sake!"
"Since when do you believe CNN? The whole thing's probably just a fancy marketing stunt. You know, hire an illusionist and pretend the show's come to life, get all the little shits to go out and buy some more toys."
"Are you - " She smothered her rising frustration. "Bon Bon, Anonymous is here, in Equestria, it's a fact. The Princess herself confirmed it. Why are you in, like, denial about this?"
Bon Bon let out a sigh, the sort that can only come from once again retreading the same tired argument.
"I have ... connections, you know, from before, and unless he somehow managed to hide from every single government agency on the planet, word would've gotten to me."
"Ponies can slip through the cracks, Bon Bon."
"But can an alien? Lyra, you're my best friend, I love you ... l-like a sister, but you have to face reality—humans don't exi - "
The front door exploded inwards, crashing against the wall as the frame buckled and hinges cracked. Through the smoke and heat and telltale ozone spice of magic, a tall figure, panting and swearing under his breath, stumbled into the room and collapsed against the couch, knuckles clenched white as he warily eyed the windows. Tattered ribbons of what used to be clothes dangled from his limbs, and ash and soot caked his skin, thickened by the sweat that poured from his scalp.
If the force of his arrival didn't betray his nature, then the blood pooling on the carpet did, and the two mares—one quivering with barely restrained excitement, and the other reduced to a dead-eyed stare—soon recognized that the being hunched over in front of them was, in fact, the source of their disagreement; not some golem or apparition or elaborate costume, but the genuine article, in the bruised and blackened flesh.
"Heh, sorry for, um ... dropping in like this." Anon turned to look in their general direction, absent-mindedly rubbing his arm, and winced when his fingers brushed over a fresh burn. "Just, uh, having some mare troubles, y'know?"
Bon Bon wasn't the sort to retreat into denial when presented with an uncomfortable truth—her time in SMILE had beaten down that particular urge until it was a little red stain on the pavement—but the prospect grew increasingly attractive as a horrible realization coalesced in the back of her mind:
She was wrong, the human was real, and Lyra would, with a smugness yet unmatched, lord that over her until the day she died.
'No. Celestia bucking damn it, no.'
But before either one of them could respond to the intruder, the front of the house, roof and all, was peeled away like an orange, momentarily suspended in a rippling purple aura before being flung across the other side of town.
There, at the boundary where ragged floorboards met grass and sod, stood a roiling mass of anguish and grief and rage, something feral that was once a unicorn. She stomped towards Anon, flaming hoofprints trailing behind her, and the sheer presence of her magic all but drowned him as she drew ever closer.
Desperation took the wheel, and the man, hands shaking and heart pounding, reached out and clutched a lamp, and threw it at Twilight with what little strength remained in his body. The projectile—though quickly reduced to a puddle of molten porcelain—halted her advance, if only for a moment, and gave him just enough time to escape through a window. At this, she surged forward with a terrible, ear-rending scream, punching a hole straight through the far wall of the house.
Those parts of the structure that remained, weakened and unsupported, soon collapsed into a smoldering pile, and the roommates—having somehow made it through totally unscathed—felt the seas of churning emotion inside their heads settle into a sort of vacant weariness.
"Lyra?"
"Hmm?"
"I don't think our insurance covers this."
Dammit Bon Bon, help a man out! Twilight's gone crazy! (Well, crazier)
Nice detour from the chase!
God damn i love when people let twily go all "tetsuo"
Less than 1000 words... Still neat...
It may not, but I'm pretty sure the crown has set aside funds to deal with all the shenanigans that Twilight and her friends get up to.
Twilight Sparkle getting a one way trip to Tarterus... Blatantly batshit crazy...
*stares slack-jawed* I...uh...I...yeah...I got nothin'.
Christ! Buddha! Zeus! Odin! Vishnu! Yhwh! Amaterasu! Azathoth! Osiris! Someone help this man!
poor BonBon
Yeah no imma stop ya right there. If the leader of the entire nation says something is real, and they don’t have a history of being an idiot, no amount of connections is gonna dispute that, especially someone older then the agency you use to work for that financed it.
Bonbon is just being stupid here.
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*cough*
Antivaxxers, Flat Earthers...
10914239
Overconfident, in denial, paranoid, etc ... people often deny what's right in front of them.
Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffffff
On the bright side...Twilight hasn't caught him yet? Still, given the amount of escalation, it's only a matter of time before Rainbow Dash(at the very least) stops Twilight. Though if they somehow got Spike to deliver a message to Celestia, even better.
"Sister". Sure. Just confess already!
You've lived in Ponyville for how long and you STILL haven't got insurance against random Acts of Twilight?
Oof
The image source is incorrect
The actual source
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Thanks for that, forgot to update it lol
10914394
Welcome, you are
The problem is that now there are two options:
1) Twiilight is sufficiently punished, which breaks up the Elements and leaves the nation vulnerable.
2) Twilight is NOT sufficiently punished, which means the justice system is very corrupt, and also it's unpleasant to read.
Both options are annoying because they're only happening because Twilight is so wildly OOC. She's a crack character in a serious story, which doesn't work unless the world reacts to her seriously.
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OOC is the fun of fanfiction, isn't It?
I'm torn between Twilight getting something of a happy ending, and being rightly punished for all the shit she's done. She won't get off easy, I'll tell you that much, but putting her away for 25 to life just doesn't seem satisfying either, nor does it fit with the whole ethos of MLP as a franchise.
F to Lyra and Bon Bon for having their home destroyed by a lunatic rapist mare and her victim.
On a side note, Summer, where are you?!
Bill it to the crown.
Better known on Earth as "Spring Break 1997"
CNN? The Celestia News Network? Canterlot News Network? Crackpot News Network?
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Drugging, kidnapping, and attempted rape are pretty damn serious, and now it’s assault and destruction of property. Yeah, Twilight deserves some major and very serious punishment or this won’t be satisfying at all.
So Twilight is going on a psycho murder rampage because the person she abducted to rape escaped. Yeeeeah, she can't possibly be considered the Element of Magic after this.
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I spend a lot of time on TV Tropes, and I like to think this story reflects it.
10914491
Attempted rape and attempted murder don't fit the ethos of MLP as a franchise either.
Like I said, her behavior only makes sense for a character in a crackfic. But she's in a serious story. Which means you can't use crackfic logic in her punishment.
10914491
Someone better hit her with an extra cleansing friendship beam, because kidnapping, assault and attempted rape are some pretty dire actions for the local demigod. It'd be fitting to follow it up with a royally enforced restraining order for an ironic punishment.
*sigh* they live in Pon-E-vill and haven't gotten Purple insurance?
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Sí, no me la pude fumar desde el inicio del cap. Pero me gustaría ver su reacción cuando sepa de la manada de Anon y de que Celestia es una fan.
Gracias por el cap ¿Es posible que podamos ver la reacción de Bonbón cuando sepa de la manada de Anon y de que Celestia es una fan?
Twilight: Proving there's being in heat, and then there's being in HEAT.
10930016
Thx
10930051
All three of those episodes essentially boil down to "don't be an asshole because of someone's race." Zecora was about welcoming people who are different, Buffalo was about not fighting and getting along, and Dragon Migration was about the conflict between acting a certain way because of what you are and acting another way because of who you are.
The later seasons have this bizarre mass-migration universalist utopia thing going on, which is not only contrary to the feel of the show up until that point (little pones horsing around in a small town), but also kinda creepy, maybe even ominous, if you account for the fact that up until that point, non-ponies were almost invariably portrayed as having serious, species-wide problems with being actually decent people. It felt like a Mad Max village letting one of those roaming, murderous leather gangs into town. Further, Twilight took it upon herself to shoulder the white mare's burden and teach all the "creatures" about friendship, which also gave the whole thing a strange undercurrent of cultural imperialism--you know, "we need big white bwana to teach us not to be savages."
I dunno, even if you ignore all the real world nonsense associated with race, the last two seasons just felt weird, like one of those fanfictions where Twilight leaves Equestria and forms her own nation (with blackjack and hookers).
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Yeah, I can see how you'd get that vibe. I mean, that IS functionally what the Friendship School mission statement openly said - Friendship © is a pony thing. - and then is HAMMERED home by Chancellor Neighsay. It's pretty tone deaf on the writers' parts, if you think about it. Then again, MLP hasn't been very consistent with its lore since Faust left, I don't think they ever had a unifying presence, with a clear vision of the world after that point.
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I fully agree. I mean haven't all those races already shown friendship? Gilda and Dash, Garble and his friends, Pinkie and the Yaks, Spike and Thorax.
And the worst about Princess Twilight is that she was forced into it. She even asked Celestia what was going on as they were in this astral plain and got simpy ignored. Most episodes would work just fine with her staying a unicorn. Even against Tirek, just give her the wings while she holds the princesses magic.
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With Rarity that has a spell find em... The D-Dogs didnt want Rarity in the episide for her looks
Lol. Wut. Oh Twilight...
It took me a second to notice the cum jar in the picture.
Someone help this man
So... When new update?
Well that was a fun catch up. Now back to the bottom of my update list you go for the foreseeable future
11014877
Eventually. College isn't fun.
Welp, Anons dead. The end.
Hello-o. It's been a lo-o-ong time. How have you been?
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and if not, it's still a matter of personal liability, and Twilight's probably good for it.
I'm glad she has her priorities straight.
Hohoooly shit.
Just label it under end of the world insurance…..yeah I got nothing.