Raven Inkwell, personal assistant to Princess Celestia, spends her last day completing her final task for Her Highness before retiring from service along with her employer.
The worst task. Checking the Royal tax returns.
Anything is possible in my own powerful mind
Raven Inkwell, personal assistant to Princess Celestia, spends her last day completing her final task for Her Highness before retiring from service along with her employer.
The worst task. Checking the Royal tax returns.
The concept is worth the upvote, but please, get someone to copy edit this.
UPVOTE I loved it!
9846659
Seconding this. Here are a few from the first scene:
This one is all present tense, for some reason.
Raven Inkwell leaned back and glared...
were once
Capital.
Parentheses should precede the comma.
I'd replace this with Yet still, the..., but I can't speak for the necessity of the change.
was keeping her.
If you aren't using a grammar checker yet, now would be a great time to start. Inkwell's a nice character, and I was glad to have read this story, structural errors aside.
9847091
Thanks for the input, I shall bare it in mind for the next one.
This story started life for a 150 word flashfic contest and just grew. Believe me I am no writer and even 150 words can be a struggle. So, for all its faults I'm not going to change anything as I'm actually rather pleased with it.
Good and helpful guidance is always well received by me, thank you for your help.
An oddball ghost happened across your fic and read it. Have a review!