Friendship is Card Games: Equestrian Horror Story & Marecrime Bay · 11:46am May 14th, 2023
We move to the back half of this wave of G5 content, which in this case means the comics. With the Discord arc concluded, let’s see if that ends up having any bearing on future issues.
Equestrian Horror Story
Hmm. Inconclusive, going by that cover. I do appreciate the shadowy aberration stealing one of Izzy’s chips. Lovely touch.
And we open on a Instagram post. Entirely reasonable for a Pipp-centric issue… but if that’s her phone running the candle app, who took the picture? Zipp’s foreleg doesn’t appear to be holding anything aloft and Hitch isn’t there. Maybe it’s Cloudpuff; if anypony would and could train their dog to make social media posts, it’s Pipp.
Panel 4 of this page is peak sibling energy and I love it. Not just Pipp’s pathetic melting, but Zipp knowing what she’s doing without even looking.
Izzy casually walking into frame explaining online engagement metrics while carrying the head of Señor Butterscotch is the exact sort of thing I want from her. They may be made-up Internet points to you or me, Zipp, but they’re your sister’s lifeblood.
“Plus, it makes me feel like the stinky horse apple who gets picked last to be pie filling!”
I get the feeling that the writer didn’t know that horse apples aren’t actually a kind of fruit.
“Don’t try to follow me to my room, where I’ll be discussing my exciting plans in exactly three minutes!”
I’m glad I was never this passive-aggressive with my big sister. At least, not when I can remember. Also, this is especially funny when one considers that they share a bedroom.
Ah, we are getting some connection to the previous storyline. Ponies were using Pipp’s meticulously kept social media as a way of keeping tabs on the Discord situation, but now that things are back to normal, she’s getting less and less engagement as those who came for adventure and/or disaster news are unsubscribing. Pipp feels like they’re rejecting her and, after coming this far by showing her genuine self, doesn’t want to change who she is just to maintain her audience.
…
I mean, on the one hand, this may be the most emotionally deep way to handle a plot built around waning online popularity. On the other, online personas are a thing for a reason.
Pipp’s going to try a livestream of an urban legend to boost engagement, summoning the Old Nag. Born Nagathine Irons in in Dodge Junction, she was orphaned after a tornado blew threw town and sent to “the Cherry Hills Foal Horsephanage,” and whose body—if not necessarily her spirit—has been laid to rest at “the Better Pastures Gaityard.” There is such a thing as too many horsepuns in a single location name. To say nothing of how both Ponygram and Instagroom are on the same page. (Still, good recreation of Reddit as Reinit.)
The idea is that by ritualistically recreating a birthday party that nopony came to, one can summon and bind Naggie’s spirit and force her to grant you a wish. Precisely why a vengeful ghost has the power to grant wishes isn’t mentioned, but given how magic was inaccessible for generations, it makes sense that urban legends wouldn’t be the most scholastically sound pieces of arcane lore.
We also get some interesting user names in the montage with “MeganRules” and “Kelpiekate.” Memories of kelpies are already an intriguing data point. Memories of Megan are fascinating. (Yes, it’s probably a throwaway reference, but I am happy to run with it.)
Ah. To Pipp’s credit, she’s not summoning Naggie to force her to grant a wish. She’s actually planning on giving her that party. Whether Naggie would actually appreciate that… Well, honestly, it might be a good way to let the spirit rest, assuming she doesn’t mind being exploited for social media clout along the way.
Izzy is similarly concerned. She’ll make the “summoning stuffie,” but she refuses to use googly eyes. They’re not respectful of the dead. Pipp, meanwhile, is more concerned about making the plushie cute and presumably photogenic.
“I haven’t seen this much engagement since the selfie with the lightning rod.”
I am deeply concerned. And that’s before considering the Paranormal Activity-style cameras in every room of the Brighthouse.
During the first night of the ritual here’s an enjoyably surreal juxtaposition of occult principles and pony flavor. Presenting protection, offering, and symbol is one thing. Those components being a can of silly string, a bag of tortilla chips, and a pony plushie are quite another.
A glass falling off an end table heralds some further shifting objects the next day. (There’s also a jar of “Regular Honey by Regular Bees” in the pantry, and with that level of reassurance, I have to wonder what they’re hiding.)
Izzy is sincerely great in this issue. She asks Pipp to think about her own actions, especially how what she’s doing is any different than the original pranksters exploiting Naggie for their own entertainment. I can’t imagine anypony from Bridlewood would take meddling in the affairs of the unquiet dead lightly.
“Night Two of Hashtag Old Nag Challenge, lights just went out for no reason! Ghost emote, scream emote, send tweep.”
Thanks for the summary, Pipp. Notably, the lights went out when Zipp showed up late as they were laying out cupcakes.
After sorting out the technical difficulties, Sunny goes behind the camera as Pipp reads a Reinit post… from a physical book. I can only assume she was taking notes earlier.
Oh, and the summoning plushie floats over to Izzy of its own accord. She is especially distressed given her respectful choice of button eyes.
Izzy understandably refuses to join in the third night, cradling “Bambino Butterscotch” and looking out at the pier. The Pippsqueaks, meanwhile, have been having a field day trying to debunk the phenomenon. “One said maybe it was swamp gas.” Don’t ask me how that one works.
On the third night, Zipp overdoes it on the ritual consumption of the curse (read: birthday cake) and flies off for the bathroom. Moments later, the lights go out, and Nagathine Irons manifests herself fully, right behind Pipp.
I’m sure the two events are completely unrelated.
Pipp goes for the full Blair Witch “I am so scared” face-in-the-camera shot (though the artist chose not to include the nasal drip.) The Pippsqueaks rally to support her (except for one “Exhorseist” who says Naggie’s going to get her.) In any case, she realizes the folly of her actions and makes her wish: That Naggie had the party she deserved.
The spirit thanks her and prepares to leave, but Pipp stops her to apologize in person.. and realizes that the ghostly bindings are actually spare party streamers.
Yup, it was Zipp in disguise. She does apologize to everypony (The plushie got stuck in Izzy’s mane due to an abundance of cake frosting… though it’s not clear how she pulled off the slow levitation. Fishing line and a stick?)
Also, nice detail with them borrowing all the cameras from Hitch. Entirely reasonable source.
Zipp did it both to make up for being “a complete horsefly” about laughing at her sister’s distress and to show Pipp she was missing the point of a tragic tale. As part of the apology, Zipp gets ice cream for both of them. (Two of those deformed character ice cream bars. In this case, it’s Cloudpuff, which raises its own questions.) Thankfully, the Pippsqueaks though the whole thing was meant as a dramatized found-footage event.
Ah, the cameras are actually part of Hitch’s cold case podcast. I figured they were just for stakeouts, but that would imply that Hitch actually does police work.
“Is it weird to be eating a snack shaped like Cloudpuff?”
“Nah, he’d totally eat a snack shaped like us.”
I don't have anything witty for this one; I just appreciate the exchange.
Ah. There was a peculiar light as Pipp was making her wish. As Zipp goes over the footage (as part of the sisters trying to bnd by sharing their interests with one another) she sees the real Naggie manifested at Pipp’s side… and right behind the laptop.
The two fly off to go wingboarding, and the laptop flickers to an image of a smiling Naggie, a plate of cake in hoof. I do love a ghost story with a happy ending. If there’s any wish that’s withing a ghost’s power to grant, it’s one to help her move on.
This was a great issue! Everypony was well-written, it had a tight and compelling plot, and the dash of the paranormal is a great way to approach magic in a world where the rules are still uncertain. Plus a good amount of continuity without dragging Discord in where he wasn’t needed. Let’s hope they can keep this up.
Marecrime Bay
Much more prosaic cover this time, though I do appreciate the sepia filter. I guess we’re taking a look at that true crime podcast.
Lovely touches on the first page, from the pegasus deliverypony to the cupholder saddlebags to the ponified Avenger action figures.
I see Zipp took some of her sister’s video editing lessons to heart. Though her suggesting the podcast in the first place implies she has more respect for Pipp’s work than she lets on.
Very fun dynamic between these two in the next page. There is definite shipping fodder here, though the relationship does also work as Platonic mutual respect.
Ooh, very organic exposition dump through recapping the case for new listeners.
Good stuff with making sure everypony in the flashback is an earth pony; this is before the return of magic, after all.
Oh! A name like “The Case of the Missing Cupcake” is really burying the lede on a missing pony case.
Jazz’s full name is apparently “Jazz Hooves.” It’s tempting to trace her ancestry back to Best Pony and/or the Doctor, though it’s possible that Hooves is the pony equivalent of Smith in terms of prevalent surnames. (It is a great name for a hooficurist.)
Also, this was explicitly before Hitch became sheriff, yet everypony involved is still in town and hasn’t visibly aged. I have some questions there.
Despite the pony of interest, one Pansy Silverbell, being renowned for her unbeatable cupcakes, much is being made of how much she loved soup. Conservation of detail suggests this will be important.
I’m not sure which username in those Ponygram comments is more concerning, Bronybaker or TimBitz. Both imply more connection to ur world than I’m comfortable with.
I do love how Hitch rolls his eyes at Zipp’s silent prompting to plug the podcast’s Ponygram account. All things are relative, including engagement with social media.
Ooh, this was a high-stakes bake-off. Ten thousand bits and an exclusive spokespony contract with a big-name baker. (Specifically Duncan Hindquarters. At least the heinous batterwitch gnarled claws haven’t reached this far…) Also, those photos are definitely leaving out some vital details. Especially the bit with a hoof covering part of the lens.
“You must be off your saddle” is certainly an interesting pony-ism. Jazz going for the counterinterrogation is just delightful.
Nice touch with how prevalent Pipp’s cutie mark is even in the back room of Mane Melody.
Jazz’s testimony is as porous as a kitchen sponge, but it’s clear that she won’t offer more if pressed. At least, not without further evidence. To say nothing of the other regrets that might have been haunting her that day.
“Whisk & Whinny” is a pretty great name for a pony-run bakery.
“Start talking, and it better be good.”
(next page)
“Ommmhhh, it’s so good!”
Outstanding scene transition.
Ah. Dahlia’s issues with Pansy lay in her living in the other mare’s shadow. Losing bake-offs was one thing. Watching her get the key to the city and streets named after her was quite another.
Also, this is the first evidence I’ve ever seen of Maretime Bay actually having a mayor. What the heck has he been doing all this time?
Zipp smugly arriving with takeout in tow is delightful.
… and it’s a food truck that specializes in soup. Gee, wonder who runs it.
“I make no promises that involve movement, but I’ll do my best.”
Yeah, I’ve been there. Food comas from really good meals are wonderful things.
Ooh, straight up G1-to-G5 leap with Surpise and Baby Surprise. Those are some very dominant genes.
“Umami Bombs” is a great name for a bun and dumpling food truck… though I have to wonder what they’re filled with.
I’m assuming the bake-off judges are based on real people; those faces feel too uncannily simian to not be references.
Ah. Dahlia won the grand prize for that bake-off, which is how she funded Whisk & Whinny in the first place. Rather sizable detail to leave out.
And shortly after that revelation, Hitch gets an anonymous email—seriously, the sender managed to snag anonymous@ponyexpress.com—asking to meet him in the park the next day. And it’s Pansy herself.
Huh. I wonder what a pony deli has to offer. Probably a lot in the way of eggs, cheese, and carb salads.
Back on topic, there’s a lovely moment with one of Pansy’s cookie recipes needing equal frosting on both sides or they crumble… which provides perfect time to bring in Dahlia.
And sure enough, Pansy’s been running the soup truck… with no explanation for how nopony noticed her beyond “I wasn’t ready to be found yet.” They could have at least included a discarded wig in there or something.
But that isn’t the point. What is is that Pansy never meant to outshine Dahlia, but once she saw she was, she went off the map for a time to let her friend take the spotlight. She acknowledges that she could have handled it better, and this whole brouhaha (and Jazz’s prodding) has finally pushed her to reconnect with Dahlia.
A lovely tale, though with a few contrivances needed to make it actually work. Plus it’s nice to give Hitch something to actually do aside from chase after Sparky… who, it must be said, doesn’t even show up in this issue. Makes me wonder just how far in advance these are written.
In all, some great stuff. Discord's presence may be barely felt, but even issue #12 is genuinely better than most of the G5 video content thus far. It certainly makes better use of background ponies. Now, let’s see what can come of these true tales:
Online Engagement 1W
Sorcery
Followers’ dilemma — Starting with the next player in turn order, each other player votes for like or subscribe. For each like vote, you and that player each gain 4 life. For each subscribe vote, you and that player each draw a card.
A million voices call for more.
Photobug Tourist 1WW
Creature — Insect Pony Citizen
Flying, lifelink
Whenever Photobug Tourist deals combat damage to a player, you and that player each draw a card.
After the Thoracic Revolution, changelings swarmed Equestria just to see more verdant lands.
2/2
Royal Exorcist 2W
Creature — Pegasus Noble Cleric
Flying
When Royal Exorcist enters the battlefield, choose one. If you’re the monarch, choose any number instead.
• Exile target Spirit.
• Exile target enchantment.
• Exile target card from a graveyard.
2/1
True Crime Podcaster 3W
Creature — Pony Soldier
Whenever another nontoken creature enters the battlefield under your control, investigate. (Create a Clue token. It’s an artifact with “2, Sacrifice this artifact: Draw a card.”)
Every listener is another potential informant.
3/3
Evasive Witness 1U
Creature — Pony Citizen
Ward 2 (Whenever this creature becomes the target of a spell or ability an opponent controls, counter it unless that player pays 2.)
Whenever Evasive Witness becomes blocked, draw a card.
She remembers what she saw. That’s the problem.
2/1
Haunting Chill 2U
Instant
Tap target creature and put a stun counter on it. Create a 1/1 white Spirit creature token with flying. (If a permanent with a stun counter would become untapped, remove one from it instead.)
Manifesting takes energy, and the air always has something offer.
Cold Case 2UU
Instant
Tap up three target creatures. Put a stun counter on each of them.
Investigate.
Reflecting Shards 2UU
Enchantment
Whenever a creature you control deals combat damage to a player, planeswalker, or battle, create a token that’s a copy of that creature, except it’s 1/1.
Legend speaks of a mirror that created foal-clones for the ponies of Dream Valley. Legend says that for a reason.
Occult Consultant 1B
Creature — Pony Advisor
Whenever you lose life during your turn, draw a card. This ability triggers only once each turn.
“Well, if the blood’s already lying around, you might as well use it…”
1/2
Agile Assassin 2B
Creature — Pony Assassin
Deathtouch
Ward — Pay 3 life.
When fighting gods and horrors, it’s comforting to know that everything bleeds.
1/3
Nagathine, the Last Guest 2BB
Legendary Creature — Pony Spirit
Menace
When Nagathine enters the battlefield, you may sacrifice all other creatures you control. If you do, each opponent chooses a creature they control and sacrifices the rest.
Whenever another creature dies, if you control no other creatures, put a +1/+1 counter on Nagathine.
2/2
Royal Channeler 4B
Creature — Pegasus Noble Warlock
Flying
When Royal Channeler enters the battlefield, if it was cast, return target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield. That creature gains haste and “At the beginning of your end step, if you’re not the monarch, exile this creature.”
3/2
Quick Recap RR
Instant
Exile target instant or sorcery card in a graveyard that was put there this turn. Copy the exiled card. You may cast the copy without paying its mana cost.
“And now, for those just tuning in…”
—Hitch Trailblazer, Maretime Bay sheriff
Toralf’s Charger 2R
Creature — Pony Warrior
Boast — XRR: Toralf’s Charger deals X damage to target creature or planeswalker. (Activate this ability only if this creature attacked this turn and only once each turn.)
“I am worthy of the lightning! You are fit only to fry!”
3/2
Ten-Gallon Tornado XRR
Sorcery
Affinity for Equipment (This spell costs 1 less to cast for each Equipment you control.)
Ten-Gallon Tornado deals X damage to each creature that isn’t equipped.
Every hat is safety gear in the right circumstances.
Baking Champion 2G
Creature — Pony Citizen
Whenever Baking Champion or another nontoken creature enters the battlefield under your control, create a Food token. (It’s an artifact with “2, T, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.”)
Whenever you attack, target attacking creature gets +1/+1 until end of turn for each Food you control.
3/2
Summoning Stuffy 3G
Artifact Creature — Construct
Indestructible
Whenever Summoning Stuffy is dealt damage, you may put a creature card from your hand with mana value less than or equal to that damage onto the battlefield.
2, T: Summoning Stuffy deals 8 damage to itself.
0/1
Commentary Troll 4G
Creature — Troll Warrior
This spell can’t be countered.
Commentary Troll has hexproof and indestructible as long as it’s your turn and an opponent cast a spell this turn.
”Cope. Mald. Bleed.”
5/4
Pixeltallow Candle 2
Artifact
Pixeltallow Candle enters the battlefield tapped.
T: Add C.
T, Sacrifice Pixeltallow Candle: Add CCC. This mana can’t be spent to cast artifact spells.
Modern solutions for ancient problems.
Motorized Banquet 3
Artifact — Vehicle
Whenever Motorized Banquet deals combat damage to a player, create a Food token.
Crew 2 (Tap any number of creatures you control with total power 2 or more: This Vehicle becomes an artifact creature until end of turn.)
4/5
Surveillance System 4
Artifact
Whenever a player casts a spell during another player’s turn, if Surveillance System is untapped, the player whose turn it is draws a card.
Unexpected activity is captured for later study, even if it’s just somepony getting a midnight snack.
Umami Bomber 3BRG
Creature — Dragon
Flying, trample
When you cast this spell, it deals 3 damage to each creature. Whenever a creature dealt damage this way dies this turn, create a Food token.
Devour token 1 (As this enters the battlefield, you may sacrifice any number of tokens. This creature enters the battlefield with that many +1/+1 counters on it.)
3/3
Avatar of Old Equestria 5GW
Creature — Pony Avatar
Convoke (Your creatures can help cast this spell. Each creature you tap while casting this spell pays for 1 or one mana of that creature’s color.)
Vigilance
At the beginning of combat on your turn, distribute X +1/+1 counters among other creatures you control, where X is the number of creatures in your herd. (Your herd consists of up to one each of Bat, Pony, Pegasus, and Unicorn.)
4/4
I can't remember much of issue #11 by now, though that also means it had very little that actively irritated. I was quite pleased with #12, mostly off of restoring Hitch to his more intelligent and composed movie characterisation over the buffoon he's been in MYM and TYT. Largely by booting Sparky, which is the advantage when you're not the main media, you're less likely to get orders to include toy plug props. Not the same thing, but I'm reminded of how little Starlight appeared in the G4 comics, relative to the show (prior to the last few years, only the Discord Anti-Chaos arc springs to mind there), showing the comics writers and editors there either didn't like her much or didn't see much writing potential.
The mystery is a little contrived, aye, but the use of background characters (this is by a wide margin the most Jazz has done) still makes Maritime Bay feel a little more lived-in. And as simple as the mystery is, there's decent layering of clues throughout that make it not the worst repeat read either. Honestly, these last two issues shows that, divorced from a mangled G4-connection arc spliced around one-off issues, these G5 comics are perfectly tolerable, and often better than the series'. The lack of budget, restrictive CG visuals and whiffy voice acting contribute to that a lot too, of course.
Before I get into the alerts, I just want to point out that All Myths Are True so often that it feels redundant to put this part. Mind you, actual official Hasbro cards commit this same error nowadays.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Yes, Nagathine's second ability will trigger her third for each of your sacrificed creatures. I don't actually remember whether you can sacrifice all zero of your other creatures to activate it, but the fact that I have to ask still goes here.
Inside Baseball Alert: Of course Pony Thor uses a mechanic from the Norse mythology plane. (Obligatory "okie dokie Loki" is obligatory). I think that might even be the name of Kaldheim's "this card's playtest name was Thor" character, but I don't care enough to look it up. (I lied, and it is.)
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Yes, cast and death triggers work in such a way that Umami Bomber will be able to devour anything it directly killed when it showed up. Note that the death trigger lingers for the rest of the turn though, so anything it softened up that then get killed in combat will give you Food tokens for any other payoffs you might have. You could even eat it yourself if you feel the need to offset Suicide Black things and/or red's symmetrical burn. (You don't need to offset Suicide Black things. You just need to kill your opponent faster than you're killing yourself.
)
I want to say I'm shocked and horrified, but at the same time, I've heard people argue that Wakanda is a real place, so… yea.
Moderation clearly isn't in the author's vocabulary.
Nice to see Hitch getting treated with respect. Zipp acknowledging him as a competent law enforcement officer is actually really nice.
Hiding in a bomb shelter until the madness dies down?
These were a couple of really good issues! Tho even as a dad with corresponding levels of dad joke pun tolerance "horsephenage" about did me in. Also I feel like a ninny for only now realizing that "reinit" is supposed to be read as "rein-it" and not "re-init". I was very confused by that one!
I wonder if Zipp's problems with Pipp's social media presence is she see's it as a waste. Basically Pipp is using it frivolously and she thinks it should be used more practically, e.g. solving crimes. Hence why she embraces their podcast while having no interest in Pipp's more pure entertainment / influencer approach.
And I was wondering too just exactly how Pansy stayed disguised all this time right next to he best friend. That's some Clark Kent level disguising apparently! Since she seems to normally wear glasses maybe she took them off to stay hidden.
5728172
Yeah, the comics are... uneven, but at least we get good ones from time to time. It's really nice when a good story also has a great artist, like the combo in this issue. I gave up entirely on the Horsetown Fart-Fetish Show.
We've known about that since All That Jazz in TYT. Pretty sure Pipp has even said it, but I can't remember where.
Once you said "bake-off," I had to do an image search to be sure, but those are Mary Berry and Paul Hollywood from The Great British Bake Off/The Great British Baking Show.
You know, as much as I hate this franchise's trend of ponifying real names by just shoving it into a random horsepun and calling it a day, at least you could make the argument that, as a franchise aimed at kids, such references need to be fairly explicit. Don't personally think that works given the examples we have, but at least there's some kind of logic to it. Plus, as someone who recently spent far too much time trying to think of good ponification of the name Hercule Poirot, I can understand the appeal of the easy way out.
On the other hand... “Horsephanage”...
Oh, for heck's sake!
Also, “Foal Horsephanage”? As opposed to what, exactly? Like, is this a reference I'm not getting cause... huh?