The Curious Case of Carl Cornejo – Equestria Daily's Enduring Eccentric · 3:10am February 21st
Equestria Daily – you've been there before but never commented. You feel like joining in. Onto Disqus you go; you make an account. Then you find a discussion, pop in and say, 'Hi, pony people! I'm new! How is everyone?' The denizens, kind and keen, make you feel welcome. Just as you start to smile, a late reply appears:
Hello, as well, perhaps to glide with the recipes in inspiration as others entail.
Puzzled, you check the user's profile. You scroll through the comments and frown. Eventually, you stop, shrug and get on with your day.
Years later you are an EqD stalwart with many happy memories. A user says, 'What's the deal with Carl Cornejo?' You (though you aren't SNES Chalmers) reply:
Cracking the Cornejo Code… I don't think it's gonna happen in our lifetime[.]
Carl Cornejo's comments speak for themselves. A potpourri of abstract nouns and choice verbs, each is a gem of obscurity. You can't read one without double-taking. The natural response is to dismiss them as some strange spammer's tosh, but here's the thing: he's been posting them relentlessly for ages, and nothing's been done about it, and perhaps nothing should be. I suggest you see the strangeness for yourself if you haven't already. After half-an-hour of looking at his latest, I came up with this:
NOUNS
recipes, mysticism, rhythms, inspiration, puns, rounds, notes, spirals, curiosity, bemusement, imagery, textures, preparations
ADVERBS
neatly, perhaps, only, impressively
ADJECTIVES
apt, newer, impressive, current
PREPOSITIONS
through, among, with, in
DETERMINERS
those, my, more, these, the
VERBS
look, glide, entail, reflect, beckon, need, might, match
Already we have the power to construct a patented reply: 'The curiosity might glide neatly through these apt notes in bemusement.' Scrolling through his comments will show you how repetitive he's been lately.
I know. 'Bot! Bot!'
Hold your horses because I knew Carl Cornejo – that is, I interacted with him before he became whatever he is today. I'm only doing this because I was certain there was a time when the man made sense. When I spotted his Disqus tag, @Angelocobro167, it clicked. I remember this guy from IntenseDebate.
Sure enough, I brought up his old account. Straight away you'll see these comments are different, albeit they've an odd flavour. For the time being, however, let's keep Disqus Carl and IntenseDebate Angelocobro separate.
The next thing I wanted to find out was how long he'd been at it. The problem with a Disqus profile is you can't reach old comments without an ungodly amount of scrolling (and praying your browser can take it). Instead, I dipped into the EqD archives. Carl's used certain words (like 'recipes') for years – since 2018 or earlier. He's formulaic. 'Hello, as well' is a go-to comment-starter. I found comments that suggest he's been spewing this stuff for yonks, but then I stumbled upon the discussion I needed, and it turns out I needed only one (two).
The discussion that cracked Carl.
Mr Cornejo
- knows how long it's been since the MLP movie
- knows it's a user's birthday and asks about it
- acknowledges having roleplayed with a user (Bookblock the Aliblock)
- remarks on the origin of a user's surname
- references the hijinks of the notorious Mares Fillies
- cites a conversation with a user
- references Applebuck Season and bids a user goodnight
- comments on Scootaloo's voice
- comments on art with what will become one of his recurring words
- states that Flurry Heart could make him laugh
Then came the other discussion. Lo and behold!
Hello, as well, with some extra delight as we await tomorrow's brainy session.
Well, well, well! It's his favourite formula, and in the same discussion he references brony memes.
Combine this with further ordinary comments (which I can't be bothered to include), and it's safe to say there's a human there somewhere.
The final step is linking him to Angelocobro, and you can do that yourself. IntenseDebate profiles are easy to navigate. You'll see the patterns. For instance, Carl attaches political links to certain words, and Angelocobro did the same. Angelocobro showed signs of humanity, so, if you accept that he and Carl are one, I guess you accept that Carl's no bot and is, in fact, committed to plastering Sethisto's digital canvas with mad musings.
Speaking of Seth, I like what Mike said. Maybe he's in the know and welcomes the site-aiding traffic that's perplexing his patrons (non-paying). Maybe he's the man behind the mystery, which would explain why EqD hasn't booted Carl for spam. If Seth and his staff are clean, perhaps we'll take it as another indication that Carl's flesh and blood. After all, bots used to visit and were spotted and stopped. Carl could be an eccentric, conscientious pro-EqD third-party. Perhaps only he knows. What astonishes me is he's still doing it. Such sustained commitment deserves immunity and a strange respect.
Ultimately, this would have been no big deal if Disqus allowed swift navigation through thousands of comments (like IntenseDebate). But writing it up has been good fun, and the largest mystery remains:
Why, oh, why do you do it, Carl?
well, I'm not sure how many answers this ultimately provides, but it's certainly a fascinating case study of a person! :O
Well, what PP said, really. I knew Carl wasn't created as a bot, since I'd seen the odd one of his non-weird posts in the past myself. That said, I must admit I think Carl has moved from "interesting curiosity" all the way to "really, really tedious" for me now, partly because I'm tired of the number of times I've spotted a new comment on EqD and clicked only to find this guy again. My own view is that (in a very small way, admittedly) he's actively harming the site's appeal now. I've got him blocked there now, and I don't intend to change that unless he starts posting real stuff again.
One other out-there thought, though: is it possible that Carl Cornejo is an alt... for Seth himself?
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Thanks for having a look.
Yeah, it's captured me. Generally, I've been half-asleep about it, but the other day I thought, 'Right, no one's biting, so it's going to have to be me.'
Is it nonsense? Is it code? Does he subject a pool of words to the I Ching? Will he ever break character? Is he laughing to himself as we flounder?
Can we solve him? I'd like to think we can. I'm going to keep more of an eye on him, at any rate. It's utterly bewildering.
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Seth's maniacal laughter rings through these newer textures.
I am aware of this phenomenon for whooping 10 minutes now, and I already see that it is a mystery not worth pursuing, and appeal of the question would be more interesting than the reveal.
But then again, it's a solid one. Yay for weirdos! The day when he will stop commenting would be indeed the one that beckoning to be among the sad ones with the inspiration as the stars match!
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You ask for answers; I give you answers.