Some meandering stream of consciousness on Twisting Between the Sheets

HoofBitingActionOverload's Twisting Between the Sheets is an unexceptional shipping story in terms of structure, but due to its powerful hook and intense focus it's stuck in my mind in the couple of days since I read it. It is centered around the discovery that Rarity has been employing an escort, who impersonates Applejack during their sessions, and the aftermath as Rarity tries to salvage her romantic life and friendships. If that sounds interesting to you, I'd encourage checking it out for a well-paced story built around a strong implementation of Rarity and a sample of an OC which left me hungry for more, some shipping that was a hell of a lot more than mashing some ponies together while insisting, "KISS!"
Spoilers below.

I believe that where this excelled was in choosing and maintaining one thing to occupy center stage, and letting everything else support it. The star of this show is Rarity's mental, emotional, and social state as some of the walls she's built to support an immediately workable life collapse. And it's something that is entirely believable for Rarity, playing up the internal tensions of the character. A love of seeing others smile when she gives them a gift she's made runs throughout the story, appearing at least three times, which stands as a contrast to Rarity fabricating the romantic love she desires from Applejack—by hiring the services of the other major character, the OC Sugar Sweet—and later trying to "nice guy" her into giving a relationship a chance.

In some respects, though, Rarity is a very reactive character here. After being definitively rejected by Applejack, she rebounds on Sugar Sweet herself, which is pointed out as such by Twilight. But the infatuation with Applejack was itself a reaction to the puncturing of Rarity's fantasy with Prince Blueblood, as highlighted by the focus on Applejack's simple rustic beauty, meaning that the story picked up closer to the end that is apparent from the start, as Rarity's substitution of the imaginary for anything concrete to fill her loneliness has been going on longer than just the few months she's been hiring Sugar, something the story gestures at from the first scene, when Twilight suggests to Sugar, who was looking for romance novels at the library, that she could offer suggestions based on what Rarity had recently checked out. This aspect of Rarity's character is supplemented by a dogged determination to maintain her fictions long past the point of reason or healthiness in the hope that things will get better if only she keeps trying, if only she gives them the chance, another piece with parallels to the Blueblood affair at the Grand Galloping Gala.

Although the intense focus on Rarity was in my opinion Twisting's greatest point of strength, I believe it had repercussions where other aspects of the story were concerned. Chiefly this is that other characters seem impoverished, and built less organically than with the needs of the plot in mind. Twilight is the most extreme example of this, for while she exhibits some agency she serves mostly as an information source or plot springboard for Sugar Sweet, Applejack, and Rarity. In her case, this isn't actually a problem, as her voicing is fine and her role is a reasonable extension of that in the show. She does what she needs to do and doesn't get in the way. The bigger issue here is Applejack. Her profound antagonism towards prostitutes is what sets off the entire plot, as she hears that Sugar—widely known in Ponyville as an escort—knew Rarity, and Rarity had backed out of an invitation to go to the spa that night with Fluttershy and her. So she followed Sugar (bringing along Twilight and later meeting up with Pinkie and Rainbow), and found she was going to Carousel Boutique. She insists on Rarity opening up, and after confronting her, Sugar makes her appearance, still transformed to look like Applejack, which is where the walls really start coming down for Rarity.

Now, this is a tricky point for me. On the one hand, it's probably one of the least complicated or contrived ways to get to the point where the story can take off. That's certainly a desirable goal, and helped with the early pacing, setting up the characters, and so forth, without pushing too hard on simple coincidence and convenience. The problem is that by putting Applejack's feelings about escorts and sex workers up front, frankly giving the impression that if Rarity employed their services it could mean the end of their friendship—independent of the later discovery that she was hiring one to pretend to be her—raises questions about whether we should be invested in Rarity's and Applejack's relationship, either as romantic partners or friends. Simply put, by establishing the possibility that Applejack left Rarity sobbing in the cold rain for hours on the doorstep of her farmhouse not because of the admittedly somewhat creepy nature of Rarity's arrangement with Sugar, but because she employed her at all, which Applejack only learned by actively invading Rarity's privacy, I'm left thinking Rarity may be better off without the abusive asshole entirely. (Also, shouldn't Applejack calling someone "filth" and "not a pony" have raised some kind of objection from Rainbow or Twilight?) (Nor does it help that Applejack's later explanation for her hatred of prostitutes doesn't really work here; the family of one of her uncles broke up because he was cheating with a prostitute. But Rarity is single; there's no husband, no wife, no kids, no family for her action to disrupt. And in any case, it seems like the blame there lies more with the uncle than the person he hired. Applejack's clannishness makes an interesting clash with itself in that case.) True, Applejack does in the end take a more mild stance, not forcing Rarity out entirely, and even agrees to have a friendly dinner soon after. But she still insists that Rarity shouldn't ever see Sugar again, not even outside the bounds of a customer-escort relationship. What saves this aspect is, ironically, the focus on Rarity's thoughts and feelings. Because that remains so in the forefront, it's possible to ignore those concerns and instead empathize with Rarity's desires. That Rarity's mind, emotions, and life are in such disorder provides ample cover for the fact that she's been horribly mistreated, and seeking approval and love from someone who's been bad to her is easy to understand and consistent with her evening with Blueblood.

I suppose considering the counterpoint, Rarity's actions, is in order. At the start, it all seems more or less fine to me, if kind of shortsighted (but then, this is Rarity, so that's to be expected to some extent). As of the beginning of the story, she's very aware that Applejack is not and will not be interested in her as a romantic partner. Hence Sugar Sweet and the transformation. It's on the creepy side of things, but there's not much indication that it's negatively impacting Rarity's friendship with Applejack. I suppose it depends on how much you want to impart into Rarity's memory of a day at the spa with Applejack, during which she gave Applejack a poor massage. Yes, that was an instance where Rarity seemed to want it to be a bonding moment that would lead to a greater romantic or physical intimacy at some point. But there's nothing indicating that she was making unwanted or inappropriate contact, and she stopped when Applejack said Rarity clearly didn't know what she was doing, and both left happy. As for her sessions with Sugar, were they actually harming anyone? It's arguably unhealthy for Rarity to indulge in a manifestation of a fantasy rather than seeking out a real-world relationship, but it seems that the most that could be drawn from that is that she was taking it too far, to too great an exclusion of the real side. And clearly, it was leading to a parallel unrequited infatuation or love directed from Sugar to Rarity, but the root problem there was Sugar's not coming forward about any dissatisfaction with the status quo. The inability to maintain complete discretion in a small town like Ponyville meant that at least parts of the secret were likely to come out in the long run, but apart from Sugar breaking the guidelines set for her by her employer (Velvet), that's more a matter of logistics than anything else.

However, there's a later point where Rarity does seem definitely in the wrong. That's when she invites Applejack for a "friendly" one on one dinner—after being told in no uncertain terms by Applejack that she didn't want a romantic relationship with her, and with a full explanation of why—and tried to turn it into a launching point for a romance. It's the blatant manipulation and refusal to take no for an answer the first time that to me really separate this event from the massage in the spa. To the extent that Rarity had had a few pretty traumatic days leading up to it, supplemented by the fact that by appearances Applejack's discovery was a defining point which broke the separation between fantasy and reality, and with it the distinction between the imagined Applejack who did want her and the one she always knew didn't, I find the entitled "I deserve a chance" attitude somewhat mitigated.

And the idea that you should give things a chance carries a lot of weight throughout the second half of the story, thankfully primarily not directed in a resentful manner at Applejack. Rather, it's applied in each direction between Rarity and Sugar Sweet, with Rarity guilty over having unknowingly at first, then directly and intentionally, done what Applejack had to her, to Sugar. Sugar, in turn, in the end decides she does want to take a chance with Rarity, despite all she's seen and heard to indicate that Rarity may just end up using her as someone, anyone, to be with rather than alone in her grieving over the fantasy that had been crushed.

But in that respect, Rarity isn't necessarily alone, as becomes clear towards the end of the fifth chapter when we really get to know Sugar Sweet better. She started out as seeming basically just nice but dumb, with a valley-girl accent, and defensive. Later, we see she's not just dust defensive regarding herself and her status, but of Rarity as well, standing up for her when Rarity herself was almost catatonic as everything was washing over her when Applejack came to the Boutique for the first time in the story. And there's some justification for finding Sugar a bit dim, since she was so poor at maintaining distance/confidentiality with respect to her clientele in the opening scene, which was something she was explicitly supposed to do per her employer, Velvet. Leaving that aside, though, there's some depth there as we learn along with Rarity that she's new to Ponyville as of a few months back, and she's alone in her own way. Her apartment, very nice, expensive for Ponyville, is largely bare of furnishings and decoration, and she doesn't know many people very well because she's supposed to keep some distance between herself and her clients' families, friends, and associates, which is difficult in the small town that Ponyville is. She knows Rarity about as well as she knows anyone, and they actually have some in common; Sugar was planning to go to Las Pegasus to be a model, but only had the money to get to Ponyville and went to work to make the rest of the way there, but ended up staying. She's very interested in fashion, hence the original career plan, and loves hearing Rarity talk about the creative side and the people behind it. Interestingly, Sugar declines Rarity's offer to try setting her up as a model with someone; she wants it to be her own accomplishment, not something she got because she knew someone who knew someone. But probably my favorite trait of hers was what she saw in Rarity: someone who was able to find the beautiful in anything and anyone, an optimism and generosity that makes for a strong complement to some of what was missing in Sugar's own life, and her experiences with the likes of Applejack ("There are tons of ponies who never see anything beautiful in anything. It’s, like, they just walk around and only ever see the ugly, and maybe there’s a lot of ugly to see."). Although their ending together is ambiguous due to their doubts and especially Rarity's motivations and general situation, there's some decent chemistry there and the seeds for a good friendship or romance, because they're willing to take the risks entailed and see where it goes in pursuit of what they both want.

A last point, though, is that when you have a shipping story with Rarity as the main character and pursuing one or more relationships (here Applejack and Sugar), in which themes like unrequited love, friendship as a potential starting point for love, and giving people a chance to see if a relationship could go somewhere all play important roles, you really shouldn't bring up that someone's told Spike about what's going on, and then drop him a few lines later. I think it's a situation that either needs to be addressed at some level, even if it's just Rarity thinking about the parallels there as well as in the main ships and maybe deciding to talk to him about it later, or should be overlooked entirely so as not to draw attention to the issue.

In the end, this was a story I found very enjoyable, if flawed in some respects. But the good very much outweighed the bad for me, and even those aspects which I took issue with were generally thought-provoking, and often understandable within the context of the characters and the situations woven together to make the story.

Comments

[HoofBitingActionOverload]

Wow, thank you! I really loved reading your analysis. Seriously, this is awesome.

I think I agree with everything you've written here. The weakest part of the story is Applejack, followed by TwiDashPie. Applejack's feelings are justified within the context of the story, and by the nature of the kind of things that are said and done in the heat of an argument. But the justification is admittedly weak. Applejack might not like escorts, but what would really bother her is Rarity's very unhealthy and uncomfortable fabricated relationship. She'd feel used and lied to, and for a pony who values honesty as much as Applejack, those would be grounds for harsh words to be said. But when shots were fired, it was Sugar Sweet who fired back and not Rarity, and Applejack ended up turning all her negative attention on Sugar instead. But none of this is very clear or well-developed in the story.

Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Pinkie Pie were window dressing. Their roles in the story existed entirely for the sake of plot-convenience. I don't think any of them did anything especially out of character, but their characterizations were all one-note and weak here.

I didn't even remember the Spike stuff. I guess I felt a minimal mention would be better than no mention at all. But there was just no room in this story for Spike.

I also think that Rarity and Sugar Sweet's relationship is the strongest aspect of the story, and I'm glad you were drawn to that, too. Sugar Sweet is one of my favorite and proudest creations, and it's always exciting for me when other people discover her.

Anyway, thanks for reading!

[Titanium Dragon]

I dunno what to say in response to this analysis other than "I agree with your thoughts on this story". Well done.