Friendship is Card Games: What About Discord? · 12:28pm Nov 8th, 2015
Well, I can definitely say that I wasn't expecting a Discord episode to be like this. Though given that this was written by the guy who did "Princess Spike," maybe I should have.
A book sortcation. Twilight really is bored if she’s coming up with three-day-long activities for herself. And seriously, Twilight. Cost-benefit analysis. Spending 72 hours for a 0.75 second per-book reduction time (at best!) means that ponies will have to look for 345,600 books before this method's greater efficiency starts paying for itself, not counting reshelving time. Odds are Twilight will have tried a dozen different sorting methods before then.
Among all of the obvious references in this episode, it’s nice to see a subtle one. Namely, Discord going to plaid. A shame I already made Ludicrous Speed in FiCG: Maud Pie.
Shades of “Too Many Pinkie Pies” here, only from an introvert’s perspective: Twilight wants to have private fun, but has to balance that with public fun. Also the orange transformations later on.
And Discord is clearly trying to teach Twilight something. That never ends well.
I have to ask, would horns normally be that flexible, or is Discord making Twilight’s extra flickable?
Analyzing fun kills it, Twilight. You’d think she’d know this by now.
It appears we have another Starlight Glimmer sighting. Right after Pinkie McFly asked about time travel, no less. This may be the most interesting thing about this episode.
Any change could invalidate the experiment? Well, how about the time variable? Yes, physical phenomena need to be reproducible, but that doesn’t work for social interactions. Again, you’d think Twilight would know this by now.
That being said, kudos to the script for indirectly addressing a fundamental aspect of quantum physics. The observer inevitably affects the observed.
And now Twilight’s crafting a narrative to better fit her view of the situation. Spike? You wanna step in and stop this before she enchants Smarty Pants again? Being Twilight’s backup sanity is kind of one of your most essential jobs.
Huh. When did Zecora last have a speaking role? She showed up in “Slice of Life,” but she didn’t get any lines…
Holy crap, I don’t think we’ve heard from her since “Filli Vanilli.” Well, it’s very good to know she hasn’t been eaten or anything. And I have to admit, that potion really does tie the room together.
You know, there’s an interesting read here with Twilight as the one friend who hasn’t gotten into a fandom. I’ve had to deal with some friends going on nonstop about Payday 2 for months, with me only able to echo what I’ve picked up through osmosis. I can certainly sympathize when it comes to friends spouting jokes I’m not going to get nonstop.
Zebra magic appears to increase the capacity of containers to ludicrous degrees. That, or lazy animation.
There’s definitely a story behind Discord’s Smooze necklace. I’m sure there will be several variations of it by this coming Saturday.
Well, Discord finally got his throne in the Palace-Tree. Had to make it himself, but he got one.
Hmm. You’d think Discord could be there, but I guess he can only perform flashbacks to events he personally experienced. Makes sense; it probably isn’t time travel as much as it is a fully immersive illusion.
In all, this episode was just concentrated meh. Its biggest failing was the complete lack of surprise. After establishing the situation, everything was literally announced ahead of time, up to and including Twilight directly telling her friends about the anti-brainwashing potion. The only true surprise was Zecora’s involvement, and the only real twist, that Discord intentionally kept Twilight’s friends from inviting her to help hammer in the lesson, wasn’t much of one. I suspected he was going for his trickster mentor routine from his first sinister glance. Combine that with the incessantly repeated gags that alienated the audience just as much as they did Twilight, and Discord is reduced to something he never should be, dull and predictable. (And really, if anyone should appreciate a little variety in his humor, it’s the spirit of chaos!)
Almost as bad was the way Twilight’s character had to be forcibly regressed to make this happen. This kind of condescending, obsessive, paranoid behavior just doesn’t feel right coming from a pony who understood friendship so fundamentally that she ascended to godhood. Yes, she feels that she needs to project a certain image to match her title, but she has very clearly been jealous before twice this season. Two words: Map episodes.
For all my grousing, there was at least plenty of card fodder to work with. Let’s take a look. Eh? Get it? No?
Exactly. 
Overplayed Gag U
Instant
Counter target spell if it has the same name as a permanent or a card in a graveyard.
Cycling 2 (2, Discard this card: Draw a card.)
“Nothing’s as funny the tenth time around.”
—Pinkie Pie, Bearer of Laughter
Twisted Justification U
Instant
Kicker 2R (You may pay an additional 2R as you cast this spell.)
Target creature becomes an artifact in addition to its other types until end of turn. If Twisted Justification was kicked, destroy target permanent if it’s an artifact.
Spell Solvent UU
Instant
As an additional cost to cast Spell Solvent, remove a counter from a permanent you control.
Counter target spell.
”I’ve many things that I can do, but first I need something to brew.”
—Zecora, zebra shaman
Book Sortcation 1U
Enchantment
At the beginning of your upkeep, you may skip your combat phase this turn. If you do, scry 2.
She may be the Princess of Friendship, but Twilight Sparkle still needs the occasional moment of “me time.”
Observer Effect 2U
Enchantment
Whenever a creature becomes the target of a spell or ability, switch that creature’s power and toughness until end of turn.
”Perception distorts reality, but it’s usually just in the mind of the observer.”
—Ditzy Doo
Shed Form 3UU
Sorcery
Exile target creature. Its controller reveals cards from the top of his or her library until a creature card is revealed. The player puts that card onto the battlefield, then shuffles the rest into his or her library.
Chaotic 2U (You may cast this card for its chaotic cost. If you do, choose its targets at random.)
Sinister Self 3UU
Sorcery
Each player other than target creature’s controller puts a token that’s a copy of that creature onto the battlefield.
Chaotic UU
Emergent Pattern 4UU
Instant
Copy target instant or sorcery card in a graveyard. You may cast the copy without paying its mana cost.
Chaotic 1UU
Given enough time, even pure chaos repeats itself.
Discord’s Glee 3B
Enchantment
At the beginning of each end step, if an opponent lost life this turn, you draw a card and lose 1 life.
”Isn’t he cute when he’s happy?”
—Pinkie Pie, Bearer of Laughter
Twilight’s Guilt 4BB
Sorcery
For each creature target player controls, that player loses 2 life unless he or she discards a card or sacrifices a permanent.
”Ponies have put me on a high pedestal, myself included. That just means I have farther to fall.”
—Princess Twilight Sparkle
Haphazard Analysis 1R
Sorcery
Discard a card, then draw a card. If you discarded a card this way, you may pay R. If you do, repeat this process.
”Science. Noun. Repeating yourself over and over until you’ve ruined the surprise.”
—Discord’s Dictionary
Hotheaded Hoverboarder 3RR
Creature — Pony Warrior
Flying
Hotheaded Hoverboarder attacks each turn if able.
Suspend 3—R (Rather than cast this card from your hand, you may pay R and exile it with three time counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a time counter. When the last is removed, cast it without paying its mana cost. It has haste.)
3/3
Nutty Antics 1GG
Instant
Put two +1/+1 counters on target creature.
Chaotic G
Expecting Discord’s magic to follow a logical chain of cause and effect is almost as ridiculous as the magic itself.
Happy Little Trees 2G
Sorcery
Reveal cards from the bottom of your library until you reveal a land card. Put that card onto the battlefield tapped and shuffle the rest into your library.
Flashback 3GG (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its flashback cost. Then exile it.)
Curse of Citrus 4G
Enchantment — Aura Curse
Enchant player
Nonbasic lands enchanted player controls are Forests.
Chaotic 2G
Mixed Recollection XG
Sorcery
Choose up to X cards in your graveyard. Return a card not chosen this way at random from your graveyard to your hand.
”Well, it definitely wasn’t a rake… I think.”
Periapt of Smooze 1
Artifact — Equipment
Equipped creature has “2, Sacrifice an artifact: Put two +1/+1 counters on this creature.”
Equip 2
Some amulets ward against malign influences. Others call upon their power.
Bottomless Flask 4
Artifact
At the beginning of your upkeep, put a charge counter on each artifact you control with a charge counter on it.
”The bounty of the Everfree is never given readily. An endless batch I must produce from every plant that has a use.”
—Zecora, zebra shaman
Paradox Throne 4
Artifact
As Paradox Throne enters the battlefield, choose creature or noncreature.
Whenever you cast a spell of the chosen kind, put a charge counter on Paradox Throne.
Spells you cast not of the chosen kind cost 1 less to cast for each charge counter on Paradox Throne.
Cosmetic Effect WU
Instant
Change the text of target instant or sorcery spell to “You gain 5 life.” (The spell’s controller gains the life.)
“I am reclusive, but I know the worth of putting on a show.”
—Zecora, zebra shaman
Draconequine Tutor BR
Sorcery
As an additional cost to cast Draconequine Tutor, discard a card.
Search your library for a card and put that card into your hand. Then shuffle your library.
Every lesson Discord teaches is paid for in sanity.
Mystic Sidewinder GUU
Creature — Snake
Flash
When Mystic Sidewinder enters the battlefield, you may choose new targets for target spell.
Anything that so closely resembles Discord in form will be twisted in every sense of the word.
2/2
Pampered Dragon 1RW
Creature — Dragon
Pampered Dragon gets +2/+2 for each Aura attached to it.
2R: Attach target Aura you don’t control to Pampered Dragon. If you do, at the beginning of the next end step, attach that Aura to a permanent of its controller’s choice. (Auras can’t be attached to objects they can’t enchant.)
2/2
Inside Joke
Conspiracy
Hidden agenda (Start the game with this conspiracy face down in the command zone and secretly name a card. You may turn this conspiracy face up any time and reveal the chosen name.)
Spells you cast with the chosen name can’t be countered by spells or abilities.
So, Starlight Glimmer has been stalking Princess twilight and friends in Ponyville, as well as in Amending Fences, when Twilight, Pinkie, and Spike go to the café with Twinkleshine, Lemon Hearts, Minuette, and Moondancer. She overhears something about Time Travel from Pinkie, who is impersonating Marty McFly from Back to the Future. Hmmmm...there are time travel spells in the Star Swirl the Bearded wing at Canterlot Library.
3529312
I also think she may have been messing around in Apple Bloom's dream in "Bloom and Gloom." Though that might just be a shared voice actress for Starlight Glimmer and Bloomie's dream-projection.
3529312
It does all seem to be coming together, doesn't it?
3529323
I suspect that that was just a personification of Apple Bloom's own insecurities. And given her talent, perhaps just a bit of Nightmarishness. It's probably a very good thing that Luna showed up when she did.
3529323 I'm with you on that one.
I look forward to the Sideboard thing that has ETSAB ask Starlight "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!"
3529712
Please translate ETSAB?
3529824
The Equestrian Time-Space Administration Bureau, an agency in some of my stories.
3529712
All I'll say is that A Mad Glimmer was always meant to have a sequel.
Yeah, not really the seasons best, is it. But at least not so horrible as to never want to watch again.
No straight white? At all?
Was Twisted Justification meant to destroy the same thing it first turns into an artifact? I'd guess so, I just want to be sure.
I think Book Sortcation should skip right to the end step, repeatable scry 2 is rather powerful. Or maybe it should skip both first main phase AND the combat phase. Having a main phase and then skipping a combat phase feels a bit disjointed for something that is supposed to represent you doing one thing at the cost of another.
Curse of Citrus; A Chaotic curse? Really?
Also, what is with you and turning nonbasic's into Forests? This is the second one, which is demonstrative of a pattern.
I'm pretty sure it's the latter.
I was rather impressed by that myself. Too bad it was such a weak episode overall.
Her admission that the glowing gunk was "just for show" was the best part of the episode, I think.
I'm pretty sure it was meant to be nigh-infinite on purpose. Of course, there's no telling if that's an effect of zebra magic or Pinkie Pie's influence.
Yeah.
3529849 Great. Best Pony and friends get to sing "Sandvich and me coming to beat your ass."
First time I've ever not liked a Discord episode. I knew this day would come eventually, but I'm still sad it's here. For as rarely used as Discord is, I expect his few appearances to really make use of him in a way that no other episodes could. Make New Friends earlier this season was great, but in this one, you could've replaced Discord with basically any other character. And it's really not well-suited to him anyway. The Gala pretty clearly showed that Discord isn't funny when he's not acting natural, and that telling jokes and actively trying to impress ponies doesn't work for him, yet here he is, however many months later, and he's essentially telling a constant stream of dad jokes. He was less funny in this episode than in the stand-up comedy show that was intentionally presented as being unfunny. Fluttershy has clearly been a terrible influence on him.
I'm with Twilight here. Even with context, I don't get why the rest of the main five found him so funny, when they usually don't even crack a smile at his antics. I almost wonder if there really was a spell, and it'd just ran its course by the end.
Aha. Ahaha. Ahhhhhhh...
God fucking damn it.
I kind of wanted Happy Little Trees to say "put the rest on top of your library in a random order," just for extra silliness.
Mixed Recollection is... weird. I understand what it does, but I keep needing to reread it to make sure. It also strikes me as kind of bad.
To be honest, I despise Discord most of the time and have a hard time understanding why he's popular. For me this episode was exactly what I expected of him
Well, this is long overdue.
3530186
Twisted Justification: The kicker effect can destroy the creature, but it doesn't have to. It's effectively "destroy target artifact" phrased in such a way that you can target nonartifact creatures that still die. However, you have the option of targeting a completely different artifact instead.
Curse of Citrus: Flavorwise, the Blood Moon effect feels more appropriate in green, using growth as a weapon to cover your opponent's holdings in trees. Same principle as Song of the Dryads.
And Auras are targeted spells.
3530302
Something the matter?
3531341
I enjoy Discord largely because of the potential he presents. He's not a nice person, but he's a very intriguing storytelling device. Also, John de Lancie sells the role fantastically.
3537536
I also disagree that he is an intriguing storytelling device with lots of potential. No offense to John De Lancie, but I find Discord tedious, predictable and repetitive. I think his main effect is to make a story arbitrary and unsatisfying, and am of the opinion that most of his episodes would be improved if he were not in them. I am aware that I am in the minority on this.
3537536
I misread Twisted Justification; for some reason my brain parsed the second ability as "destroy the targeted permanent" instead of "destroy target permanent".
I could see that being a U base cost with a 1R kicker rider ability, right now a 2R rider ability for Shatter is still pretty nice since it can be creature kill.
My main thing about a Chaotic Curse is you could very well wind up cursing yourself. But then again that is what you get for playing with power beyond your understanding, and by definition True Chaos is undefined and can't be understood.
3537536
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The works of Ted Anderson will always haunt me.
3537999
Well, how about that?
3538026
Life is suffering.