Friendship is Card Games: Applejack's "Day" Off · 10:43am May 29th, 2016
Okay, who ordered the oil tanker full of shipping fuel? Seriously, if this thing had capsized en route, the oceans would burn orange and white.
Hmm. We’ve seen Applejack enjoying the spa before, but it’s still surprising to see it be her primary form of spending time with Rarity… though it’s not like they have terribly much in common beyond trying to keep their sisters from killing themselves. With the Crusaders exercising far less reckless abandon, the spa being the primary point of commonality does make some sense. Still, when did Fluttershy stop being Rarity’s go-to spa buddy?
Oh, who am I kidding? She probably has arrangements for both of them.
I really don’t know what to make of Rarity’s pruny horn. Seriously, what are those things made of and what’s in that steam? (Also, I suppose this shoots down my “horn full of brain” headcanon, but I’m hewing to it until we get an explanation for this madness beyond a visual gag.)
It is nice to see Rarity and Applejack’s relationship develop. Just look at them now as compared to, say, “Look Before You Sleep.”
Sorry, Spike, but Starlight is phased out for this episode. Twilight knows who ate the pies.
Heh. Shades of “Somepony to Watch Over Me” in Applejack’s nervousness over Twilight slopping the hogs. Though I also have to think of Goosed! and AJ’s thoughts there on how each of the Bearers channels the others on occasion. Leave going full Twilight to the professionals, folks.
The return of the Tank slippers! 
Though I have to wonder how Dash thinks her usual treatment is a secret when half of the town is in the spa. I suppose she just doesn’t want Rarity and Applejack to know, and really, I can’t blame her.
Also, it seems Dash got over her discomfort with having her hooves touched since “Ponyville Confidential.” I wonder how long that took.
Again with the “Dashie” from Rarity. When did that become a thing?
There’s some foreshadowing with Applejack’s insistence on starting with a steam bath. That same inflexibility has snared her in gross inefficiency. Still, I appreciate her taking the practical approach to the problem, not least because doing so paints her in a far more respectful light than the third act, even if the pacing left something to be desired. We don’t need to see every literal step in the investigation process.
I have to wonder; how is the spa’s water heater powered? Also, if this problem has been developing for a while, does this mean that Rarity hasn’t visited the spa at all since the extra-pruny incident? That doesn’t seem like her. I suppose she might have just given the sauna a miss with the bad memories and all, but it still feels like a stretch.
Ah, lists. Twilight’s greatest weakness. She will follow them, come Tartarus or tidal surges. I’m not surprised it took her so long to go through a routine Applejack managed quickly. It’s not like Twilight has much experience with wire-fu, while AJ can go through the whole thing without even thinking about it through sheer repetition… though that does raise the question of how getting Twilight to do it would free up an hour.
At first, I thought the hog feeding ritual was part of some tradition akin to zap apple jam preparation, but it’s just a lump of obsolete work-arounds. Not sure how I feel about this. On the one hand, Applejack’s stubborn streak could certainly lead to bad habits getting ingrained quickly. On the other, you’d think she’d try to do something when she found herself with no time to spend with her friends. At the very least, another member of her family could’ve said something upon seeing a pig feeding method less efficient than a Rube Goldberg device. (After all, the device doesn’t require constant user input.) Heck, given how hard it was for her to do her job, it might qualify as a cutie mark problem.
One thing’s for sure: They really could’ve eased back on explaining the moral. It felt like the entire second half of the episode was dedicated to it in one form or another.
Okay, the chickens I can understand, but the bit with the irrigation valves is just ridiculous. There may be some logical chain of events that would lead to opening the valves like that, but it's a lot harder to justify the system's existence in the first place when it's in a world with manually controlled weather.
That last bit definitely swung the pendulum too far in the other direction with Rainbow Dash. It just feels cruel to the character at that point.
In all, this episode took some very odd turns, and not for the better. Neither the characters nor the setting feel right, and there are multiple stretches of not very much. Yes, force of habit and being too close to a problem can be issues, but I feel like there were better ways to portray them.
Still, that doesn’t mean there wasn’t anything to work with:
Steam Bath 1W
Instant
If an opponent cast three or more spells this turn, you may cast Steam Bath without paying its mana cost.
You gain life equal to the number of instant and sorcery cards in all graveyards.
Magical boilers supply much of Equestria’s hot water needs.
Thorough Pampering 2W
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant creature
When Thorough Pampering enters the battlefield, you gain life equal to enchanted creature’s power.
Enchanted creature can’t attack or block.
”No comment.”
—Rainbow Dash, Bearer of Loyalty
Towel Warmer 2W
Creature — Unicorn Artificer
When Towel Warmer enters the battlefield, you gain life equal to the number of artifacts you control.
Power over terrycloth may not seem impressive, but it definitely has its uses.
2/2
Sanitize 2WW
Sorcery
Destroy all enchantments your opponents control.
”The Purifying Full-Body Cleanse will remove all toxic elements from your system, restoring coat sheen and invigorating the muscles.”
—Lotus Luxury Spa brochure
Handymare 3W
Creature — Pony Spellshaper
W, T, Discard a card: Return target artifact card from your graveyard to your hand. Activate this ability only any time you could cast a sorcery.
Sometimes the best magical reagent is elbow grease.
1/2
Æther Bottleneck 3WW
Enchantment
If a creature would enter the battlefield from anywhere but exile, if Æther Bottleneck is on the battlefield, exile that creature instead.
At the beginning of each player’s upkeep, that player puts a card he or she owns exiled with Æther Bottleneck onto the battlefield.
When Æther Bottleneck leaves the battlefield, return all cards exiled with it to the battlefield under their owners' control.
Find the Problem U
Sorcery
Investigate, then scry X, where X is the number of Clues you control. (To investigate, put a colorless Clue artifact token onto the battlefield with “2, Sacrifice this artifact: Draw a card.”)
The first step of any solution is determining what needs to be solved.
Impossible Infiltration 1U
Instant
Target creature gains hexproof until end of turn and can’t be blocked this turn.
”This corncob will now self-destruct.”
—Pinkie Pie, Bearer of Laughter
Full Schedule 2U
Sorcery
Detain target creature an opponent controls. At the beginning of your next upkeep, detain that creature again. (When a creature is detained, until your next turn, it can’t attack or block and its activated abilities can’t be activated.)
Habitual Force 5UUU
Creature — Elemental
At the beginning of each player’s first upkeep each turn, that player gets an additional upkeep step after this step.
”It is every predictable repetition, every rote action, every stultifying routine. It is the enemy.”
—Discord
7/7
Condescending Snob 2B
Creature — Pony Citizen
Condescending Snob can’t be blocked by creature tokens.
”Your net worth isn’t high enough to make me care what you think.”
2/2
Vicious Cycle 5BB
Enchantment
At the beginning of each opponent’s upkeep, if that player has one or fewer cards in hand, he or she sacrifices a creature.
Whenever a creature an opponent controls dies, that player discards a card.
A pony in a bad situation will often do her utmost to make it worse.
Circuitous Ritual 1R
Instant
Add RR to your mana pool.
Draw a card.
”I have yet to discern any mystical purpose to the chicken dance.”
—Princess Twilight Sparkle
Steam Leak 1R
Enchantment — Aura
Enchant artifact
Whenever enchanted artifact becomes tapped, Steam Leak deals 2 damage to that artifact’s controller.
1U: Tap enchanted artifact.
Softhearted Ruffian 3R
Creature — Pegasus Warrior
Flying
Whenever Softhearted Ruffian becomes the target of a white spell, it gains indestructible and lifelink until end of turn.
”What? The coat trimming makes me more aerodynamic.”
2/2
Outside Perspective 4R
Sorcery
Gain control of target creature until end of turn. Untap that creature. It gains haste until until end of turn.
Draw a card.
”Have you tried hitting something?”
Lazing Hogs 4G
Creature — Boar
W, T: You gain 3 life.
”Oh, they may not seem like they’re doing much, but trust me, they’re a good investment.”
—Applejack, Bearer of Honesty
3/4
Prune Up 1(wu)
Instant
If W was spent to cast Prune Up, target creature gets +0/+3 until end of turn. If U was spent to cast Prune Up, target creature gets -3/-0 until end of turn. (Do both if WU was spent.)
”It’s by no means a good look, but it has its uses.”
—Rarity, Bearer of Generosity
Gorging Dragon 1RG
Creature — Dragon
Trample
As Gorging Dragon enters the battlefield, you may sacrifice any number of noncreature permanents. Gorging Dragon enters the battlefield with a +1/+1 counter on it for each permanent sacrificed this way.
Draconic appetites can be constrained, but not controlled.
2/2
Pain 1R//Pleasure 2W
Instant//Instant
Pain: Pain deals 4 damage to target creature that was dealt damage this turn.
Pleasure: Prevent all damage that would be dealt to target creature this turn. You gain life equal to the damage prevented this way.
This episode felt padded all to hell
Every part of it was dragged out far beyond what was necessary, and the overall impression is that the writers just didn't have a strong enough idea to fill an episode and got desperate. The steam room line scene, from the moment Rarity walks into Caramel's flank until the repair/pamper montage, is literally five straight minutes of basically dead air, with no real jokes and nothing happening.
It was a good half episode, but where was the other half?
I agree. I think there was a good lesson in there somewhere but the slow pacing killed it. Plus, the attempts at comedy fell flat. I chuckled maybe twice and it had more to do with the talented VA's delivery than the writing. They didn't have much to work with at all.
Not the worst episode ever, but it was very "meh" slice-of-life.
I already wrote a detailed comment elsewhere, so I'll just link it here.
Obviously after their offscreen hook-up between seasons.
A mediocre episode at best. The first half was okay, and poor Twilight getting literally tied in knots in her efforts to follow Applejack's incomprehensible list was fun, but a huge chunk of the episode relied on characters holding idiot balls.
Particularly Applejack, who, we are lead to believe, has been juggling the things for an indeterminate amount of time.
I'm really not a fan of idiot balls, and as such, I'm not a great fan of this episode.
Ah, well. They can't all be gems. It's just sort of too bad that they keep striking AJ with the Mighty Fist Of Dumb, though. Anyway, next week...worldbuilding as we actually see Pegasus family dynamics in action. (You'll notice I don't screw up like Lynn Johnston and say 'family politics.')
I play Hearthstone and have never touched Magic, granted, but that looks like a lot of healing spells. Is that normal?
Though thinking about it, Steam Bath especially feels like a nicely balanced tool. 1 health per burn spell in the graveyard is not crippling to the aggresor, but enough for the player to feel like they're plugging the leak.
Enormously padded episode with a few good opportunities for shipping screenshots, but the latter can be said of every episode through the right lens. Best part was Towel Pony, whose face perfectly encapsulates the sentiment of "I hate my job and I will stab all of my customers in exactly 5.7 seconds".
This card would be good against a mono-White deck a friend of mine has. Tokens for days.
I didn't dislike the episode; it felt just alright to me. Just a question, how does Æther Bottleneck fit in with the episode? All the other cards I see where the sync up but that one. And was that snobby mare Spoiled Rich? Did anyone catch Mr. and Mrs Cake in the massage rooms? And Lotus gets a lot of speaking lines all of a sudden.
I did provide an answer to that in Rock Farms and Nuclear Reactors, which I'm sure someone could develop into a theory to explain Rarity's pruny horn.
Floppy horns have been shown in the show before.
And then there was Twilight under the influence of poison joke.
So horns aren't as solid as they might first appear. Also, flicking a unicorn horn kills their magic and it hurts.
3980775
You do make a persuasive counterpoint, but I'm going to have to maintain my current stance. Still, I'm glad you enjoyed it.
3980804
The episode informs the cards, and one set largely in the spa is going to yield a lot of cards that make you feel good.
3980840
It's even better if you imagine him saying that in his ambiguously foreign accent.
3981029
The incredibly long line to the steam room. It went through several iterations during the design process, but the idea remained the same: replace "the steam room" with "existence."
3981038
Pinkie told them not to use the coolant in the steam room. Good thing there are magical treatments for this sort of thing.
3981047
That's not floppy, that's pliable. You can do the same thing with a wooden ruler, and those don't go limp when steamed. And poison joke is almost certainly a form of chaos magic, which throws all established rules out the window. This is as disturbing as it is illogical. I think I'm going to go with the radioactive theory. Pony tech levels seem to be at a point where a Radithor steam bath seems like a good idea.
3981112
Pliable things can become floppy if they become oversaturated, if they can absorb water.
Look at certain sponges. When dry, they're hard and stiff as a brick. There's no way you'd want to rub that against your skin. But after a soak in some hot water, they soften quite a bit and become quite floppy.
Rhinoceros horns can be softened with steam and reshaped. I saw that on the Discovery Channel a long time ago on a show about taxidermy.
3981112
Maintain away; I find your side equally convincing.
You did a much better job designing these cards than the writers did on the episode. AEther Bottleneck is a way less stupid version of Portcullis.
I actually liked the moral of this episode. Once a device, object, or process has been gathering minor modifications and patches over a significant period of time, it can be downright reinvigorating to have the thing get analyzed as a whole. If you can get someone else's perspective on it, so much the better. It's especially applicable to EDH decks and fanfic chapters.
Do you think Pain//Pleasure should have a fuse cost, like the RtR double cards? Or should they remain one-or-the-other, like the older double cards?
Kinda like power over bugs! What a useless power THAT is! ... OHGAWDNOTTHEBEES!
I don't think the wording on Æther Bottleneck works like you think it does. The "instead exile it until Æther Bottleneck leaves the battlefield" wording isn't actually putting them onto the battlefield, and simple reminder test on it won't work since because the creatures are exiled before they enter the battlefield they are still technically "spells" and so you can't "return" them to the battlefield, because they were never there to start with. The cards with this wording on them that you may have based Æther Bottleneck on all remove stuff already on the battlefield so they can "return" them back to the battlefield, but Æther Bottleneck can't do that.
It should probably read as follows.
That is if you want the Creatures to actually show up after it's gone. If not then just cut the last line.
Not sure how I feel about Thorough Pampering. It's like a super powered Recumbent Bliss but that only ever gave you one life. Even Pillory of the Sleepless only takes away one life every turn so worst-to-worst you have twenty turns to deal with it.
Pacifism effects are meant to be a stop gap measure and minorly annoying, but as it is now Thorough Pampering could very well put you into an unreachable life total if you drop it on their biggest beater and they have no means of getting rid of said beater or the Enchantment itself so their only recourse is to concede and hope you don't get it next game. (Which is their own fault for not having an answer in constructed but in sealed they might not even have an answer and this is not the sort of card you want to be potentially unbeatable in sealed, that sort of card need to be "flasher" (maybe even with Flash) and Thorough Pampering isn't that flashy, it's an Uncommon at best.)
Maybe make it so the Creature's controller, instead of the Enchantment's controller, gains the life? That way if you're wanting to gain life yourself you have to lock down your own creature to do so and the sorts of decks that want Pacifism effects could probably win without the extra life the opponent would gain being that big of a problem. You could probably drop the cost down to 3W as well if you made that change.
I read "stultifying" as something else at first... . <_< >_> <_< >_>
But, hey, new word!
Circuitous Ritual might not look like much for thoses who don't really play M:tG but it's actually a rather nice card, I'd put it around Uncommon in rarity, depending on the set. But it color fixes and cantrips at Instant speed. That's very powerful, not quite Rare powerful but still powerful. Though it doesn't really do much in mono-Red. Other than being a filler card draw spell in your All-In Red deck so you're basically running 56 cards instead of 60 and can get to all your real cards faster... .
I find it funny that Steam Leak is an "Izzet" card and makes the most sense storywise being used against the Izzet.
The reminder text for Prune Up should be "(Do both if WU was spent.)", "spent" over "cast".
As written, Æther Bottleneck stops tokens from entering the battlefield. Intentional? Pleasant side-effect?
Hmm... now I'm getting an idea for a second cycle of Forces that do something for each player on their upkeep. Green could give them mana, red could let them rummage, white might give them a small token... not sure what black would do
With Towel Warmer you will always be a hoopy frood.
3981195
Most fuse cards have a synergistic effect when combined. I suppose Pain//Pleasure might work in the spirit of Profit//Loss, but it doesn't feel sufficiently unified for me to justify it.
3981730
Feature, not a bug.
And black's second Force would probably do something unpleasant to all players. Black's kind of a jerk like that.
3981333
Æther Bottleneck: That was the original wording, actually. I tried to make it more efficient and neglected to consider the consequences. Correcting.
Thorough Pampering: Another valid point. This is what playtesting is for. I'll make some alternate adjustments... though I do have to disagree with your characterization of Pacifism effects. Those are removal cards, plain and simple. It's just that white's answers have answers of their own.
Circuitous Ritual: I feel I should note that for all of the impressive work this card does, it's still strictly worse than Manamorphose, which says a lot about that card.
Prune Up: Adjustment made. Thanks again.
3983769
Manamorphose is a great card, there is a reason it was bumped up to Uncommon for the reprint.
Circuitous Ritual is also a good card for the reason you can use it as filler in a hyper aggressive mono-Red deck and it serves as color-filter in your more mid-range Red-Green decks. The majority of the time I don't really care about "any color".
Though my Reaper King decks (one block and one Commander) certainly like the ability of tuning UBRRG into WUBRG.
I also totally dropped the ball on Æther Bottleneck still needed to be on the battlefield for ability resolution, so good catch there.
As for the view of Pacifism effects... . I'm the sort of guy that always runs Enchantment removal if it is in-color, maybe not a full play-set but at least two of, depending on the sorts of Enchantments that are available in the current Standard. So I don't really see Pacifism effects as "removal that can be removed". I do know that is the role they fill in set design, but I view them as temporary measures used to buy their caster time, which, when one thinks about it, is how one could look at removal effects as well; most removal effects don't put you one up.
But, well, everyone thinks of things slightly differently than one another.
3981730
Verdant Force, at least, already exists, and gives its controller all the tokens.
3983915
Commander products have provided Celestial, Tidal, Baleful, and Magmatic counterparts to Verdant Force
Well, in Rarity's case, obviously her horn is made of marshmallow, like the rest of her.
For me personally, this episode is simple, low-key fun, and that helps make it my favorite AJ episode...
That and the scenes with RD, which were both cute and hilarious.
However, at the same time, the fact that this episode is so simple also makes it the weakest episode of the season, though that's not really saying much given how good this season has been.
3986346
It was a fun episode for me, and one absurdly relevant to my interests.
I just realized. From a distance, AJ's pig feeding ritual does look suspiciously similar Granny Smith's jam making ritual. However, upon closer inspection, there are some key differences, well, besides the fact that each step in the jam making ritual actually serves a purpose. Granny is significantly older than AJ is. Granny's probably had decades, maybe even centuries (if she's really as old as some fans think she is), of trial and error to figure out how to make jam properly. It's like my mom says, "I've been doing this longer than you have."
3986515
It looks that way to applejack too, which is where the inclination for normalizing ritualisms likely came from.
It's the in universe explanation for applejack being particularly dumb this episode; it honed in on a specific childhood perspective of imitating adult life that applejack had environmental impetus to preserve.
3986455 Really? I enjoyed this episode because AJ kind of reminded me of my wonderful mom.
"Power over Terry cloth." *had Nobilis flashbacks* First rule of Nobilis, don't mess with the Lord of Blankets.
Um, why are you crying?
Second rule of Nobilis...!