Damn it!

Hello people,

I don't really know what to say; so I just try to write straight from my heart. I feel like I'm currently going through a depressive episode once again, but this one keeps effecting me pretty hard. I lost my mood to continue writing, I'm lonely, scared of the future and so on. I'm lost in nothingness (is that even a word? ). I just don't know what to do now. It's not like I'm thinking to do something worse to myself, because I know that this is wrong.

But to be honest ... there is just something missing. It's like I lost the spark of life itself and I'm more like a shell, wandering around on the surface of this world.

And I just want to say that I'm thinking about deleting my Thandor fanfic. I don't have any feedbacks yet, so I don't know if its good or bad. I maybe have to rewrite it and post it later. No master has fallen from the sky yet, or? About the other fiction I've started ... the first 3 chapters are finished, but unedited and (very) short. 500-1000 words. I'm not good or great at writing big chapters yet. My 'special talent' in my teenage years was to write short storys and small poems. Maybe its because of that or because I'm just thinking small and just write episode for episode as long some ideas are on my mind before they get lost.

I hope you all are a bit happier than I am.
Please don't worry to much about me: everything will be alright, right?

Cheers and stay awesome out there!!
PB Metal
\m/