"The Secret to Avoiding Revolution": A Meditation · 1:07am Mar 26th, 2018
So this is just a silly little thing, half-meditation, half-political theory about Equestria. I'm sure nobody but me will find this interesting, but... yeah. :P
The human had long since accommodated themselves in Equestria. They'd met the mane 6, gone on an adventure, traveled the world, all that jazz. Now, they found themselves in Canterlot, face to face with the Princess of the Sun herself, with a single question on their mind.
"How?"
"How what?" she asked, smoothly.
"How have you been able to stay Princess for one thousand years?" they asked. "In my world, governments rarely make it past a century or two before getting overturned, and yet you've been able to keep Equestria together for a millennium!"
"Multiple millennia, actually," she replied. "And the answer is quite simple." She stood up from her throne and gestured for them to follow. Confused, they walked behind her as she walked over to one of the nearby windows.
Looking out, the human gasped at the beauty of it. The sun was just beginning to set over Equestria, and in the orange and pink light, you could see every last corner of the world: Ponyville down below, Appleloosa far to the south, Manehattan to the east, and even a little bit of Las Pegasus, peeking over a distant forest. "That's your whole kingdom," they said.
"That's right," she said. "And I have absolutely no power over any of it."
"Ah, I see--wait, what?!" They considered briefly that this might be a prank of hers, but... "You're telling me you don't do anything? That you're just a figurehead?"
"That's part of my role." She inclined her head, pointing towards her throne. "Put forward a good face, be the representative of Equestria abroad. Ponies like to see me, like to know I'm listening. That doesn't require me to govern."
"Okay, then... but then who's governing? Do you have a Parliament or something?"
It took Celestia a moment to parse the foreign word, but then she smiled. "Ah! We do have the Conclave. That's when all the major leaders--Mayor Mare, Fancy Pants, Sheriff Silverstar, and so on--all get together and discuss the future of Equestria."
"And they make all of Equestria's laws? Govern for all?"
"Nope! The Conclave has absolutely no political power, also." Celestia gave a huge grin as the human facepalmed. "To answer your original question, there is no national-level government that makes any laws or dictates for Equestria as a whole. Each individual city-state--Canterlot City, Manehattan, Ponyville, Mustangia, what have you--makes their own decisions. Whether their leaders are as hooves-off as I am is entirely up to them."
"Okay, but you're the one in the big castle. What are you doing all day up here?" the human asked again.
"For one, I'm the face of Equestria, as I said. So most of my time I spend organizing conferences or visits. I'm also a wise and powerful alicorn with millennia of experience, so I'm often called out to manage issues of my scale. But I suppose you wouldn't consider that being a princess, though of course I'd disagree."
"No, I get that, it's just... ponies talk about you with such reverence, as though you were the pony at the top of the foodchain."
"Oh, I am," Celestia replied simply.
The human gave her a confused look. "...You just said you don't have any power."
"I don't, and that's exactly why I sit in that throne!" She pointed to it again, then looked back at the human with a crazed look in her eye. "I sit there so that nopony else can."
"W-wha?!"
"That's my entire purpose!" Celestia said. "I'm the ruler of Equestria! Being that, I've intentionally relinquished all of my power. If I wanted to, I could convert the Royal Guard into an army, take over, and make all the decisions. I'm not going to do that, because I don't want to. But by doing that, it also prevents anypony else from getting the same opportunity as me, and wanting to."
Celestia sighed and magicked up a copy of a history textbook. She flipped through the pages as she said, "Our history is full of horrible leaders, the kind who were either facing wars from within or wars from afar. The unicorn kings, the pegasus generals, the earth pony chancellors... far many more corrupt than good. So when I took over, I swore... enough." She threw the book into the air and destroyed it with a blast of magic. "You have your human saying, 'Absolute power corrupts absolutely.' Our saying is closely related: 'Dark magic has already corrupted you the moment you open the book.' So I swore I would never open that book. I would be a good leader without an army, without a bureaucracy, without tax, and without fear.
"That leads me to my last duty as Princess of Equestria." She smiled and gestured to her marvelous throne room. "I can be a powerful force for good simply by sitting here and advising, never commanding, but advising my ponies what to do and how to be. I can be a model to them of good morality, and they can follow me." She paused for a moment, then laughed. "I lied a bit, before. I know how the leaders of the Equestrian city-states manage their territories: they do nothing, just like me. They've seen how well Equestria has stood with my guiding presence, and they do the same. Ponyville's Mayor Mare and her siblings--you've met them, right?--have no police, no tax collectors, no enforcers. They know everything runs smoothly on its own. The streets are safe, the market is fair, and the citizens are happy and healthy. Everypony in Ponyville works together to make that a reality, because they want Ponyville to be great."
"I don't think we humans could do that," the human replied. "There's too much variation. Too many races, too many religions, too many competing ideas."
"Don't you think we ponies have the same thing?" She gestured back out to the window, where all of Equestria lay. "There are ponies from all walks of life out there, and they don't all agree with one another. This isn't paradise, human, but we make it work. I imagine there are even ponies out there that think my method of rule is ineffective, that want to bring back the rule of kings, generals, and chancellors. But my system is designed specifically to prevent these uprisings, and the reason why is simple."
"Enlighten me."
Celestia raised a hoof. "In the old governments, revolutions were bolstered by the current power structures. The army would be swayed, or the senate would be infiltrated, and the whole thing was destroyed from the inside. But under my rule, there is nothing for them to latch onto. Every governmental position is, effectively, symbolic. And of course, if they wanted control of Equestria, they'd have to unseat me, an immortal, powerful alicorn." She laughed once. "Good luck with that!"
"Right, but we humans don't have any immortal demigods running around--at least as far as I'm aware," the human said. "We don't have anyone like you that the whole world can rally behind."
"Then don't make your system like ours," Celestia said with a shrug. "Ponies are different from humans--physically, mentally, sociologically. We have a stampede reflex, magical attunement, the cutie mark, weather control--but you have an omnivorous diet, the narrative bias, thrill-seeking, and higher education. It's neither good nor bad, just... different. However, if you had traveled back in time, back to the days with three governments butting heads with each other, they also would have said there was no hope for unification. Earth ponies, pegasi, and unicorns are just too different." Celestia gave a soft smile. "I hope I've proven that isn't the case."
"But how?" the human asked. "How did you go from division to unity?"
Celestia paused. "...I couldn't tell you. When Equestria was made, many things happened at once. All of ponykind united under one name--they were all Equestrians. My sister and I arrived, symbolic creatures of the unity of all three kinds of pony. We introduced the virtues of Harmony--Honesty, Kindness, Laughter, Generosity, Loyalty, and of course, the Magic of Friendship. We made our entrance by defeating a foe that threatened all of ponykind. All three races congregated into a single area. I could go on. Perhaps one of them would be enough; perhaps all of them are necessary. Or maybe ponykind's herd instinct is so strong that it makes our society possible." She shook her head. "I don't know. I wonder, same as you, whether our model would work for other cultures. Would dragon society work without the Dragon Lord ruling over them? They don't live together like ponies do. Can the yaks live under the virtues of Harmony? But their society is obsessed with perfection, leading to constant squabbling over the tiniest error. Are you humans so self-obsessed that you will always go to war over trivial disagreements? Are you so xenophobic that you can never accept foreign cultures as equal members of the human race? Are you so power-hungry that you will always try to rule over others, rather than letting them pave their own way?"
"I don't think so. All of that, it's ingrained into our lizard brains."
Celestia smiled. "Ah, but I just described my little ponies again. The earth ponies constantly started wars over the tiniest disagreements, the unicorns saw the other pony kinds as lesser, and the pegasi were always trying to conquer their neighbors. And if they could overcome that, maybe you can, too."
"...Maybe."
Celestia saw how sad the human was, and she picked their head up with a hoof. "There's another secret to avoiding revolution, you know."
"What's that?" the human asked.
"All revolutions are led by those suffering or in need. I don't believe revolutionaries like killing and bloodshed, but when they're desperate, backed into a corner, they'll do what they see as necessary. Bad governments, like the ones before Equestria, create want and strife, but good ones create prosperity and happiness. And the spirit of togetherness under those governments means its citizens help one another, lift each other out of poverty." Here Celestia smiled again, in an effort to get the human to smile as well. "You humans have a deep sense of caring for others, possibly even stronger than our virtues of Kindness and Generosity. If you could channel that, create societies where that care was encouraged, you'd have your own version of Equestria. But encouraged, never demanded. You humans, for all your differences, are like ponies in this respect: you are utterly truculent against an authority telling you what to do. Required to be generous, you immediately become stingy; required to be kind, you become self-oriented. In the old world, the ponies saw their interdependence as a bitter necessity; in Equestria, they see it as a beautiful opportunity for Generosity. They aid one another, and by doing so, hold each other aloft."
The human thought on that for a moment. "...But isn't that the exact same reason from before?"
"What makes you say that?" Celestia replied, ever cryptic.
"Well, you have no power as Princess, and the leaders of the city-states don't have any power, either. They have nothing to give, so the citizens have to provide everything themselves. They need to support each other, or they'll die."
"You're right." Celestia nodded. "So the true secret to avoiding revolution is the one you've heard about more than anything else: the Magic of Friendship. When all the creatures of an entire country care for and support one another, there's no need for a government, and thus no reason to revolt."
"You're asking for a lot, Princess. You're asking to overcome all of the evils in our world with... with what? A handshake and a fruit basket?"
"You say that as though it's ridiculous," Celestia said with a laugh. "But I'm not saying you should offer a hoofshake and a fruit basket. I'm saying you should offer one million hoofshakes and one million fruit baskets. A force of kindness like as unto a hurricane, a fire roaring full of friendship!" Celestia's mane had gone askew, as much as her fluttering hair could, and she'd gotten that mad gleam in her eyes again.
The human stepped back. "You're crazy," they said.
"Perhaps. But it worked, didn't it?"
"Here in Equestria, maybe. But back home..."
"'Back home,' goodness works just the same as everywhere else. It takes many forms, it comes in many different flavors, but at the end of the day, goodness is what makes the world better. And if your people don't know that, can't learn that... well, then maybe it is hopeless. Government or no government, a world without goodness will never reach unity."
"So that's your recommendation for me? Make enough people good, put them in the forefront, and hope everything works out okay?"
"It's the worst possible idea," Celestia said, "except for all the other ones."
The human drew in a breath to counter her, paused, thought through it, and then shrugged. "Yeah, pretty much."
"The only consolation I have for you," Celestia added, "is that you don't need everypony to be good. Just enough to hold the core together. The rest will fall in line eventually."
"Hopefully."
"...Yes, hopefully."
Yeah, but all it takes is one murdering bastard to upset the whole apple cart.
The strong prey upon the weak, unless enough weak get together to be strong. Of course, then you go back to the weak preying on the...
Hmm, this is a realluy interesting take here.
I can buy Celestia sitting at the top to prevent less scrupulous characters from doing so, but anarcho-capitalism inevitably leads to the rich and powerful and corporations taking over.
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I agree with that second part. That's kinda what the "million hoofshakes and a million fruit baskets" line is about. Ultimately, the only thing to prevent that cycle is, at some point, to find a center point that doesn't lead to oppression and violence. "An it harm none, do what thou wilt" is a pretty good starting point, in my opinion. "We are the filialhood* of mankind" is another building block to it. And of course, "Be prepared" (and its close cousin, "Have a low time preference"). One way or another, all members of society must work to protect and assist one another, without ever falling trap to sacrificing themselves or each other to that nebulous concept, "the common good."
As to the first part... I don't know if any system has a good answer to that. But whenever a governing power exists with sole rights to strength, you'll eventually run into the issue of A) that power abusing that strength, or B) that power neglecting to use that strength when needed, whether due to negligence, malice, etc.** At that point, you'll need a counter-force, either to revolt against A or supplement/replace B. But the danger, then, is in letting the counter-force replace the original, rather than challenging the idea of a single, central seat of power.
Again, I'm not really a political scientist or anything. All of this is parroted from other, much wiser thinkers than I. My only novelty is in connecting this to Celestia's management of Equestria.
*What's a good gender-neutral term for "brotherhood/sisterhood?" "Siblinghood?"
** I wish at this point to stress that I've had this idea for a while; it has no intentional connection to current events.
Heh! Nice analogy.
Btw, the whole idea reminds me of the Appleseed saga. There, when mankind faced self-extinction through its violent impulses, it created the bioroids. Unable to feel emotions and thus free of aggression, hate, or greed, these engineered clones were produced in such numbers that they'd work as a permanent buffer among our society.
Athena herself (one of the first bioroids, who's also the Prime Minister of Olympus) reminds me a bit of Celestia, too. She's more decisive and strong-willed, but in the end, her goals and intentions are very similar. Peace, union, security and prosperity for everyone.
Such examples really make it seem as if mankind is simply unable to follow a course of harmony and friendship by itself, and in the need of outside guidance from an emotionally superior species.
Well, I, for one, welcome our new pony overlords
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...Huh. I'm not sure if I've ever heard of Appleseed. Thanks for the recommendation!
But yeah, I can't pretend to have the answer. I did leave an out for those who find right-libertarian/anarcho-capitalist/anarcho-monarchist theories distasteful. Another answer, very different from the one I propose, is a hierarchical structure, like the Boy Scouts or the military. Maybe it's just the color pie-White in me speaking, but that kind of society really resonates with me. So that's another possibility. Ultimately, though, the most important concept for world peace is best summarized by a famous excerpt from the Principia Discordia:
It's a silly story from a silly book, but I'm always reminded of it whenever there's evil in the world. It's because someone, somewhere, wants it--or rather, they want something more than they want peace.