Friendship is Card Games: Feats of Friendship #3 and EqG: March Radness · 12:32pm Apr 26th, 2020
This week, I catch up with the comics. Well, the IDW comics, anyway. Manga from both sides of the Pacific are in the hopper, but for now, it’s time to close out a storyline and revisit a universe.
Feats of Friendship #3
Um, spoilers? Not that I expected this side arc to end in world war or anything, but they could at least try to preserve what little tension they’d established. And looking at the alternate cover, now I’m disappointed that the Student Six were never sent to ask Bramble to join the School of Friendship.
Ah. Still the Hippodrome, as it was last issue, though not the one before it.
Interesting to get a good look at Swift Foot’s bedroom at home. Sure, there’s the weapons over the bed, but also some plush unicorns I wasn’t expecting from such a hard-bitten culture of original-tribe-do-not-steals. (Heck, where’d they get the material? Not exactly the climate for textiles. Or much of anything. What are Mordor's major exports?)
Not a lot of chromatic diversity in the royal family, is there? After more than a millennium of isolation, Thrace must not have the most diverse gene pool. And on that note, why name a mare “Blonn Di” when she’s as grey-green as everypony else? At least Shining Light works. Terri Belle is just… well, it’s right there in the name, isn’t it? Even if it does lead to some amusing possibilties about Rarity's family having ties to Thrace.
I do have to wonder how Terri came about the information on the recent political history of the world and the students in particular. Thracian spies infiltrating Equestria and reporting back? I can’t imagine she infiltrated personally. Not unless Equestria has a growing population of wandering Tempest Shadow cosplayers.
So, let’s review: The plan is to sabotage a demonstration of the merits of friendship, thus collapsing the very concept and causing Equestria to spiral into a dark age as its very national identity is torn asunder, leaving it ripe for the conquering.
It’s a terrible plan, but it’s not like anyone on Thrace actually understands what friendship is beyond something to revile.
As Herald of Opera pointed out last week, Diomedes wasn’t just king of Thrace, he also owned a notorious herd of flesh-eating mares. Here, they’re represented by his daughters, which is honestly quite clever. It may also explain why King Thrace was shunned by the other tribes. Given the desperation of the windigo winter, well...
Again, how did the Thracians gather all of the intel on the Student Six? It really says something when a group of ponies does a better job of infiltrating than changelings… though that may be more condemning Chrysalis’s incompetence than praising Diomedes and Terri’s espionage corps.
Oh, Twilight. So easily charmed by proper bureaucracy. Hopefully she takes the opportunity to brush up on her geography after this.
And seriously, Swift Foot and Cozy Glow shouldn’t be able to coexist. One would definitely teach lessons about dealing with the other. If nothing else, learning to watch for ominous glares and muttered threats in prospective students.
Swift. Sweetie. Just because you can destroy something doesn’t mean it never existed. You sabotaged them, yes, but that doesn’t mean friendship is a lie. If you grind a statue to powder, someone still sculpted it.
Oh hey, convenient secret Yak lessons are convenient… and once again raise the question of whether any of the other students have non-Ponish native tongues. Two of them have beaks. (Granted, at least one of those beaks is saxophone-compatible, but still.)
Mark your calendars, everyone. Sandbar lost his mellow. And that mellow is not easily harshed.
“But if I change, people get scared.” Informed attribute if there ever was one. Yes, lingering anxiety around changelings is sadly understandable… but we’ve never actually seen it from anyone other than Neighsay.
Vengeful, defensive Yona is a good Yona… from this side of the fourth wall, anyway. The way Smolder’s gripping the edge of the panel has me nervous. Pinkie Pie in a teaching position is even more dangerous than I realized.
Oh, poor Swift. Defeat pulled from the jaws of victory by a single sentence of broken Yak.
Hippogriffs molt. Interesting to note. I wonder if it coincides with their rear halves shedding. And how it may effect their seapony forms.
“Oh no! We’re learning!” Just think of it as adding more knowledge to your hoard, Smolder. And there’s a beautiful irony in attempted friendship sabotage only making it stronger. There are several villains who can empathize with Swift there.
Ah yes, reaching out to the member of the Evil Empire with no redeeming features to its culture. A dramatic classic.
I can appreciate posing as a team because crap has gotten real, but that last panel seems almost sinister. I think it’s the combination of Dreamworks faces and Gallus clutching the drama orbs.
“Our students have done an excellent job of showing us the strengths of their friendships, and what happens when we let that strength lapse.” Excellent spin control on Twilight’s part.
Doubling up on the gladiatorial combat portion of friendship. Not sure how to feel about that. I have to wonder if learning how to function in society through becoming an adventurer had some unfortunate consequences for Twilight’s understanding of the concept.
“That one on the left looks like my uncle.” And now I’m wondering how dragons and hyrdas are related taxonomically.
The hydra may be an illusion, but it’s apparently still capable of fear. And Ocellus chose to keep her own face. I have to wonder if all of those heads are fully functional.
Also, the group fighting a hydra? I can’t help but think of this classic.
Huh. Going by the multiple view angles and expressions on the next page, yes, each of Ocellus's heads is functioning independently. This must be a fascinating experience for her. Also, the illusion is tangible enough for the others to cling to it like they’re trying to revive Mono.
And at the risk of being that guy, why exactly are Gallus and Silverstream ramping off of Ocellus when they can, you know, fly?
Dang. Silverstream’s stronger than she looks if she and Yona are the only ones who held down a hydra head unassisted.
“Is that all? Send Yona another!” I have to appreciate Yona treating hydras like Thor treats coffee cups.
Nice touch with the team only getting silver. They didn’t exactly have the best showing in some earlier events, and not every competition can end in Dumbledore awarding a hundred points for having the bravery to get hit by a Body-Bind Curse.
No one ever realizing Swift Foot was trying to sabotage them does admittedly resolve her continuity conflict with Cozy Glow. If they never knew they were duped, they can’t plan for the next one.
And odds are Swift died when she returned to her home planet nation. She was already the runt of the figurative litter, and coming back preaching the gospel of friendship? Sure, that’s a success on a personal level for the School, but Diomedes will have little to no patience for such talk, and a proud warrior race isn’t likely to suffer culture-traitors for any longer than it takes to swing the headsman’s axe. After all, it’s not like we ever hear of Thrace again... though, to be fair, the comic only came out five months ago.
Alternatively, trained as she is, Swift escaped and became a fugitive fighting a shadow war Equestria may never know about. Also possible, and far more narratively intriguing. Either way, this left a lot of world building questions in the air. On the one hand, this means we can answer them. On the other, what’s there doesn’t offer a lot of incentive to do so.
Equestria Girls: March Radness!
And so we come to the last unreviewed IDW comic I’m aware of, and the comics’ first foray in the human world since Anon-a-Miss. Technically, the full title of the issue is “My Little Pony Equestria Girls: Canterlot High: March Radness,” but I’m opting out of that level of colon cancer. In any case, it’s sort of the comic equivalent of “Holidays Unwrapped,” consisting of three spiritually similar small stories. Let’s take them one by one.
Detention is Magic
Interesting to note that the girls are in their first outfits for this one, putting it only a bit after Friendship Games.
I’m not sure what I appreciate more, Ms. Harshwhinny devoid of context, Twilight asking why she didn’t clean off any of the pie, or Cranky’s “You’re not here to discuss Mrs. (sic?) Harshwhinny’s hygiene.”
“I hope she isn’t too peeved at me.” 
Fluttershy! Language!
Ah, the Rashomon. Though presented far more efficiently than “P.P.O.V.”
There’s something wonderful in seeing Fluttershy go full “Fly, my pretties!” To say nothing of how each of the girls paints their memories.
I honestly didn’t notice until now that the sound effect of Dash’s soccer ball hitting Fluttershy’s locker is “GOL.” Magnificent. Though Dash’s face in that last panel is… less so. Seriously, Dash, what the crap?
Of course Rarity has an Outfit of the Day livestream.
Of course Twilight made Applejack a pie-making android.
Panel 4 here is art, pure and simple. Meanwhile, the sheer quantity of streamers Applejack wades through looks like Pinkie assumed her full eldritch form in the hallway. Which is awfully inconsiderate.
Applejack didn’t even ask for Lattice-Bot. Twilight just created electronic life unprompted, before Ro-Barb was even a thing.
Ah, good, video evidence. This should help.
… Wait, the blue liquid was supposed to be pie filling? I thought it was either water or lubricant. What kind of pie is that? Even blueberry tends to come out more purple.
“There goes Rainbow Dash’s football…” No matter the universe, Rarity knows precisely one sport.
We get it, AJ, you’re a country stereotype. You don’t have to call clearing your name “forming a posse.”
Heh. Again, not sure what I like more, Trixie and Snips silently watching this whole debacle unfold or Cranky sleeping through the whole thing.
“I still feel embarrassed, but I’m sure something bigger and even more embarrassing will happen on the Internet to make everyone forget about me.” A good attitude to take, really.
Dashin’ Around
A lot to take in with Dash’s room. from the doll to what may be a Vinyl Scratch poster to the enigma that is “Sports Combined” to her tortoise alarm clock. Also teddy bear pajamas, which I had not expected.
And a giant stuffed tortoise as well. I have to wonder what endeared this Dash to the animal. I can’t imagine one saved her life after she got stranded in a canyon by her own actions.
Ah, the burden of Loyalty. Dash said she’d be there for Applejack, and she can’t leave a friend hanging.
Heh. B3EPX2 license plate. Beep beep, I'm a cloud it's a car. Cute little Easter egg.
As if duty and Daring Do weren’t dividing Dash’s loyalties enough, now the Apples have gone and added cider to the mix.
“I admit we’re behind on collecting eggs from the coup.” Ah, yes. The revolution must pay its due.
“Daring Do in Stairs Atelier”? Either I’m misreading that, there’s more to the title getting covered up by Applejack’s word balloon, or I’m just not getting it.
So… did Applejack just physically drag Rainbow Dash from the form to Bewk’s Books?
Nice touch with Applejack’s motivation. How much time do these girls have to just hang out together? (Also, when “mysterious equine magic” becomes a common phrase for you, you know you’ve lost control of your life.)
And human A. K. Yearling raises a lot of questions, doesn’t she? The whole “cloak concealing khaki” look doesn’t work quite as well when you’re bipedal.. and the cloak is more of a shawl. Given her elusiveness, this leave the question of how this Yearling gets her ideas very ambiguous indeed.
Lovely resolution, combining lessons on both communication and quality time. Though Rarity may have words for Applejack, depending on how your shipping goggles are set.
Getting Seconds
Ah yes, the sports festival/Field Day. Putting aside the question of the timeline, I can definitely see CHS doing this on years when they don’t hold the Friendship Games.
This is honestly a great characterization shot. Dash is confident, Applejack and Rarity are eager to compete, Fluttershy’s nervous, Sunset is going full unicorn, Twilight’s showing how she internalized some degree of Crystal Prep’s competitive spirit, and Pinkie’s just happy to be there.
Ballet is an unconventional addition to an athletic competition, but I can’t dispute it. Poise, grace, balance, it’s all there. It’s really just cutting out the middleman of floor gymnastics.
“The stuff I did was on four legs or with magic.” Again, going full unicorn. Sunset has never seen a reason to get along with human sports. Even her participation in the Friendship Games was through motorsports.
Fluttershy using a game of fetch to train for the discus event is honestly ingenious.
There were some Filo products in the previous story as well. Going by the inverted swoosh, it appears to be the local analogue of Nike. (N->O, K->L, E->F, then anagramize. I gets a pass since Floj makes for an awkward name for either athletic wear or a goddess of victory. And Jolf is just eighteen holes on denim.)
Very interesting to see the personalized gym shorts. And before anyone says anything, I mean the personalizations. 
The human cutie mark phenomenon really gets curious when they put the symbols right over where they’d be on their equine counterparts. I have to wonder how Sunset feels about this.
The names are interesting as well. Fluttershy’s last name appears to be Shy going by her number, whereas Rarity is a one-name person. And Pinkie is #314, because of course she is.
Best Human. Best long jump. And Pencils called her Ditzy Doo, which is obviously worth a lot of points from me. (Of course, you can’t exactly call her Derpy Feet, but still.)
Ouch. Getting beaten by a Twilight Sparkle at anything must sting for Dash. No doubt she still remembers the princess’s attempt to play soccer.
Also, I want to see Dash’s second-place ballet routine.
And on the later leaderboard, Fluttershy is presented as a single name. Pony naming conventions don’t make sense in any universe.
Also, it appears there were eight bronze medals awarded in seven events. Presumably there was a tie somewhere.
And once more, we have cutie marked shorts, even on soccer uniforms. Which are supposed to be, you know, uniform.
Ah, there’s Dash’s anxiety kicking in. If she’s not leading the pack, she can’t help but feel like she holding others back.
And Twilight’s #42, carrying on the tradition.
… And Pinkie can apparently track Dash by scent. Okay, then.
“I still can’t wrap my head around all the soccer strategy and field positions, it’s just too much!” Huh. I’d have thought Sunset would have a better sense of tactics than that, but thinking about it, her strengths do lean more into the strategic side of things. Even in the first movie, it all started falling apart for her once she had to go from orchestrating her grand plan to matching Twilight move for move. Really, all of Celestia’s students have some issues with improvisation. (”We just need to build a perfect replica of Ponyville! We have ten minutes.”)
Subtle touch: As in “Rainbow Falls,” Ditzy is Dash’s replacement when the latter is unwilling to take the field.
… I’m just going to assume that the scoreboard’s always like that. “Home/Visitors” doesn’t make much sense when it’s meant to be an intramural game.
Poor Fluttershy. Stuck in the spotlight for the medal ceremony.
In all, this one was a delight. Feats of Friendship may have bunted on its attempt to establish a grim, mysterious enclave of ponies looking to overthrow Equestria—I’d love to hear what Star Swirl has to say about King Thrace—but March Radness was a welcome, show-tone return to the human world. Lower stakes, but it did more with them rather than puffing up some distant menace that never really came to anything.
Now onto the last chance I’ll get to make humans for a while:
Starstruck Silence 2W
Enchantment
As long it’s your turn and you control your commander, your opponents can’t cast spells or activate abilities that aren’t mana abilities.
Cycling 1W (1W, Discard this card: Draw a card.)
Students’ Solidarity 2W
Instant
Creatures you control get +1/+2 until end of turn. If there are five or more creature types among those creatures, they get +2/+2 until end of turn instead.
Ocellus’s friends rallied around her, offering more love than she had ever dreamed of.
Vengeful Disciplinarian 4W
Creature — Human Advisor
Flash
When Vengeful Disciplinarian enters the battlefield, exile target creature that dealt damage to you this turn.
Breaking the rules is bad enough. Breaking her poise is unforgivable.
2/2
Climactic Projection 2UU
Creature — Hydra Illusion
Climactic Projection enters the battlefield with four +1/+1 counters on it.
Whenever you cast a noncreature spell, put a +1/+1 counter on Climactic Projection.
Whenever an opponent casts a creature spell, remove a +1/+1 counter from Climactic Projection.
0/0
Skilled Generalist 2UU
Creature — Human Warrior
U: Skilled Generalist gains all abilities of target creature you control until end of turn.
Anything you can do, she can do about as well.
3/3
Fashion Streamer 3U
Creature — Human Artificer
Whenever a player on your team casts an artifact or enchantment spell, each player on your team draws a card.
A hundred thousand followers mean that every outfit will yield some helpful insight.
0/1
Innocuous Silencer B
Creature — Pony Assassin
Flash
Deathtouch
“Turn around and close your eyes and you will get a big surprise.”
1/1
Memetic Mockery B
Sorcery
Target player discards a card.
Escape—2B, Exile three other cards from your graveyard. (You may cast this card from your graveyard for its escape cost.)
The Internet never forgets; it just finds fresh victims.
Squish into Jelly 1B
Instant
Destroy target creature. Its controller creates a Food token. (It’s an artifact with “2, T, Sacrifice this artifact: You gain 3 life.”)
If a yak merely crushes your bones, they were being merciful.
Thracian Spy 2B
Creature — Pony Rogue
Exploit (When this creature enters the battlefield, you may sacrifice a creature.)
When Thracian Spy exploits a creature, look at the top three cards of target player’s library. Exile any number of those cards, then put the rest back in any order.
2/3
Twin Tormentors 4B
Creature — Pony Soldier
When Twin Tormentors enters the battlefield or dies, target opponent loses 3 life unless they sacrifice a nonland permanent or discard a card.
Thrace is a merciless land, the palace doubly so.
4/2
Review the Footage 1R
Instant
Exile from an opponent’s graveyard target instant or sorcery card that was put there from anywhere this turn. You may cast that card from exile without paying its mana cost. If it would be put into a graveyard this turn, exile it instead.
Recurring Disaster 2RR
Sorcery
Target player sacrifices a permanent at random. Exile Recurring Disaster with three time counters on it.
Suspend 3—R (Rather than cast this card from your hand, you may pay R and exile it with three time counters on it. At the beginning of your upkeep, remove a time counter. When the last is removed, cast it without paying its mana cost.)
Horizon Chaser 3R
Creature — Human Warrior
Haste
“Just because I have magic super speed doesn’t mean I’ll stop pushing my body to its peak.”
—Rainbow Dash
5/2
Cross-Training 2G
Enchantment
Whenever you cast a spell, put a +1/+1 counter on target creature you control that doesn’t share a color with that spell.
You can’t grow your comfort zone without leaving it.
Farm Chores 2G
Enchantment
Creatures you control have “T: Untap target land.”
No matter the month, no matter the world, there’s always work to be done on Sweet Apple Acres.
Rallying Swarmbonder 4G
Creature — Human Druid
Hexproof
3G: Populate. Each creature you control that has the same name as the token gains hexproof until end of turn. (To populate, create a token that’s a copy of a creature token you control.)
3/3
Hivemind Hydra XGG
Creature — Insect Pony Hydra
Trample
Hivemind Hydra enters the battlefield with X +1/+1 counters on it.
When Hivemind Hydra dies, draw a card for each +1/+1 counter on it.
Reformed changelings appreciate diverse perspectives.
0/0
Baking Automaton 3
Artifact Creature — Construct
2W: You gain 3 life.
“A recipe is a program: Do this, set this value, wait this long. Automatization just a matter of designing hardware and software that can efficiently and robustly execute that program.”
—Twilight Sparkle
2/2
Tome of Tedium 3
Artifact
2, T, Put the top two cards of your library into your graveyard: Draw a card.
Every page feels heavier than the last, weighed by the reader’s boredom.
Tendrils of Eternal Fun 9
Creature — Eldrazi Jellyfish
Emerge 6UU (You may cast this spell by sacrificing a creature and paying the emerge cost reduced by that creature’s converted mana cost.)
When you cast this spell, return all creatures to their owners’ hands.
6/6
Diomedes, King of Thrace 2WUB
Legendary Creature — Pony Noble Soldier
Hexproof
Other creatures you control have exploit. (If a creature has multiple instances of exploit, each triggers seperately.)
Whenever a creature you control exploits a creature, put a +1/+1 counter on each creature you control.
4/4
Daughter of Diomedes 3WB
Creature — Pony Soldier
Exploit
When Daughter of Diomedes exploits a creature, return another target creature card from your graveyard to the battlefield.
2/3
Volcanic ash is a very good fertilizer. Just saying, Mordor makes more sense as a functional country than the temperature-reversed situation you're actually talking about.
Or she just read ahead in the comic but wants to make it sound like she has a skill instead of a mental illness.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: The ability "changeling" gives you all the creature types, which is five or more. They're making their own love now, so this scans better than it's probably supposed to.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Recurring Disaster is worse than you think it is, because in the situations where forced sacrifice is good it's probably hitting a land. Oh, and suspended spells aren't optional, so under certain circumstances you may be forced to hit your own land.
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Tendrils of Eternal Fun doesn't need an "other creatures" wording because she's still on the stack when her triggered ability resolves.
Play Design Warning: Farm Chores is additional copies of Cryptolith Rite for most of the things that that's used for, with some additional wrinkles that may actually make it even more broken (think Itlimoc, and much like with Halqifibrax I apparently have a way easier time spelling that on the first try than most people do).
Much fun.
Stickler note though, I don’t know about Mordor’s major exports but I do know it’s only ashen wasteland near the dark tower and mount doom. Further to the south and west they’ve got massive slave plantations around an inland sea. So I’d guess their major exports are a mix of crops and tools, since most of the devastation is due to rampant unchecked industry with no safety or environmental standards.
Wow some of the panels you linked are very...
When did Rob Liefield get a job at IDW?
Also, FILA is a sportswear brand as well.
First off, Swift's sisters are a couple of [insert very rude word here]
Second, I'd enjoy a story that fleshed out the story of Thrace some more. Hey! Maybe that was when the Student 6 fully realizes their Elements of Harmony v2 status
It sounds like a corny attempt to make horse puns like the rest of the franchise does, because it is! But then some rando tells you that they also hold surprise meanings behind the names.
5250602
Oh COOL! Thanks for that.
Cross Training is interesting, but Baking Automaton takes all the fun out of it by lacking an etb and sac proc.
5250555
I see feet and no pouches. What do you mean?
5250625
Hold on a minute...
Stupid Complicated Game Alert: Colorless is not a color, so casting a colorless spell with Cross Training lets you put the counter on anything and casting any spell lets you put a counter on a colorless creature. Also, mono-green Eldrazi is already a deck that exists.
5250506
Definitely one way to maintain the illusion of a fourth wall for her friends.
Also, after taking Earthcraft's "basics only" clause into consideration, I've bumped Farm Chores up by one mana. Admittedly, it's not much when considering the likes of Itlimoc, but at least it makes the curve a bit more awkward... even if Growing Rites curves into it.
Hmm. It's times like this where I wish I had the time and people to actually playtest these before posting the blogs.
5250509
I should've known better than ask questions of the deep lore of Middle-Earth. Of course Mordor's exports are catalogued somewhere.
5250555
Excellent point on FILA. Completely forgot about them.
That said, I'm not seeing anything Liefeldian in the linked panels. What did you mean specifically?
5250594
Would that be before or after the giant magma rhino?
5250602
You'd think after last week I'd have thought to check the source material in greater detail. Still, thanks for pointing out a very cool Easter egg. Even if that's still a terrible way to convert Xanthos to pony naming conventions.
5251246
"Liefeld" is just my go to when comic anatomy/etc is just... strange...
5250555
Some time after changing his name to Jay Fosgitt, I assume. At the very least, there are definitely artists for the official comic who are as bad at drawing ponies as Liefeld is at drawing humans.
As an aside, somewhere in my head there are notes for a Yugioh archetype meant as main deck monsters for the Lovecraft stuff, and the art direction for one of them is "imagine Conan the Barbarian as drawn by Rob Liefeld, except the colorist realized he'd been handed an abomination and decided to play it up instead of down" (they're cultists based loosely on Lovecraft's inner social circle, and it should be obvious which one that's supposed to be)
It is amusing because it is accurate.
Ah. I see that the comics are continuing the show's late season trend of clumsily inserted racism allegories.
So, having not read this myself, I'm curious... what was the point of Thrace, in the end? Did they really retcon the founding story of Equestria to insert their original fourth tribe do not steal only to give a backstory to a single individual antagonist, not set the story there, and not have the other characters learn about it or even learn about that particular antagonist's motivations? Because if so, that sounds even more pointless than I dared imagine.
5251800
That's not exclusive to the later seasons; they had an African equine who spoke entirely in rap practically right from the start.
Mostly just an excuse to throw in yet more references to classical mythology, like the ophiotaurus in the last season of the show.
5253624
Hasbro owns Wizards of the Coast. DHX was just getting their money's worth out of the copyrights/trademarks in the Monster Manual.
5251246
Could also be FILO, it would be funny to have athletic wear named after a pastry dough.
Also raises the question of whether Pinkie was talking about athleticwear or just wanted to make the bar rhyme when she says "and you'll never get your (FILA/fill-ah)" in the Cupcake Song