An Inconvenient Truth · 3:15am May 8th, 2022
Hi,
I was debating putting this off until June, when it would be seemingly more appropriate, but almost ninteen years is too long, anyway.
Some users on here might already know this (looking at you, Fillyfoolish!), but most of you, if not all of you don't.
Wondering what it is? Well, wait no longer. I'm bi.
Yeah. I know, very anticlimactic for most secular people. However, this is a big deal for me to finally accept. Some of you might know about my suicide attempt at 14. It wasn't just about my ASD, it was also about this.
Coming from and still living in an Orthodox Jewish community, these kinds of conversations aren't really had; and when they are, it's in a negative light. After the fic "Seeking" was published this week, and seeing how receptive people were to the reconciliation of faith and identity, I thought I'd vent for a bit.
In a way, bisexuality is more difficult to deal with than being homosexual. There is this feeling of not belonging in either the gay community or the community at large. You "aren't enough" of either.
There's also the problem of having autism and wanting a romantic partner. Most people assume autistics are asexual, almost childlike beings. That's not true. We want love like anyone else.
Nobody irl knows that I am bisexual; not even my family. I trust that this loving, accepting community will be understanding of this, and respect my wishes only to be "out" online.
Just because I am dealing with this issue doesn't mean I don't want to be Jewish. I do want to be Jewish. It's a huge aspect of my identity. Heck, I still want to be Orthodox Jewish. I've been struggling with these ideas since my early teen years, and I am still working on finding my own path.
I love you all, and thank you for accepting all of me: the biness, the autism, and the Judaism.
Take care, and be kind.
Oy vei
Very interesting situations in store for your future.
Wife: So you're want to have a threesome with you, me, and a man?
You: Yep, already got a guy picked out. Also I'm hope you mind sharing Steve with me.
Wife: *Takes a moment to process* Oh jeez. *Shakes head in hand while cracking up*
P. S. Better to be bi than gay in that life.
5656045
lmfao.
Nah, I have a lot of trust issues. If I ever was to fall in love, I'd stick with one person.
Ah, the age old problem of trying to be who you are when friends, family or other important people in your life "don't approve." Relatable.
Personally, as long as you don't hurt yourself or others, then really you can do what you want with your life. Live where you want to live, follow your dream career path, fall in love with who you want to fall in love with, be a member of whichever religion you support, just generally make decisions for yourself. But hey, supposedly I know nothing about how the world works. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
As for the whole "acceptance" thing, I'm someone who doesn't like to make a big deal out of anything. If you're autistic, you're autistic. If you're Jewish, you're Jewish. If you're bi, then you're bi. Simple as. Makes no difference to me or to our friendship.
I'm glad you're accepting yourself, as all three. There are autistic Jews and bi Jews and autistic bisexuals and yes, bi autistic Jews ... I might even know one or two myself
Even if you can't safely do so IRL, I'm glad at least here you can embrace all of who you are.
I feel like this blog post might be my fault
Congrats on coming out! And good luck!
5656203
ayyy!
5656204
Bisexual Buddies Forever! Yay!
I can't really relate, as I am not homosexual, but know that I support you.
Be who you wanna be, bro.
I realize this is late, but congrats on the self-actualization.