Ok, guys, so I've seen plenty of people joining this group, and am extremely happy about it. But there remain a couple problems. This group is designed for me (and the other two admins) to help you, and that can't happen if we don't know who you are or what drove you to need such help. So this here thread is for every member of the group, new and old, to introduce themselves (you don't have to say your real name if you don't want to) and share the reason that you joined this community.
If you don't want a lot of people knowing certain issues, please just tell me through a PM. Thanks!

1792141
I'll start us off then? Lovely.

Whelp, my name is Grant and I'm an alcoholic. I joined this group because I've been told I'm a good listener and in case anything happens in the near future which requires me to vent frustration/sorrow. A fair exchange in my eyes.

So yeah. Who's next?

1792227Hellooo~
I'm Nick!

1792462
Hiho friendo /)

That is one funky as mane you have there

Well I go by the name Squall Lockheart, but people call me either Squall or Lockheart for short. Some of my 'issues' come from my parents divorce years ago. Other then that, in high school I was diagnosed with a behavioral disorder. After high school I tried to join the US military only to get turned down for being a 'hot potato'.

At one point I was thought to have split personality issues due to me being able to role play up to 3 charterers while playing Dungeons and Dragons (I miss those days). I can't do it like I used to (mostly due to not having anyone to game with) but I think I could still do it (I could explain it but that would require some background information and several pages of dialog between a idiot and a very unlucky healer).

As for what brings me here, I never had anyone to turn to. So being in a place where I can get some help and offer to help others is ideal to me. Other then that, it's better then trying to help people on my own. I don't know how many people I've been the last one to talk to them before they...
That's enough right there. If you sink back into depression over that I'll have to tell Celestia, and she'll come down here and deal with you personally, again.

I'll be good, I was just explaining things here. Can I at least finish that?

Fine just hurry up, you've got a lot left to do tonight.

Yes I know. Anyway it's nice to be here, I hope I can help if not just be entertaining. When I'm not being told what to do by bookworm ponies and their over-sized lists.

I heard that!

Well I gotta run, I hope everyone has a better night then me.

In my 50 years of life, I've lived through a mom's depression and her suicide, my bipolar depressions, my suicidal overtures, ADD (diagnosed finally when I was 48), an almost-marriage-destroying porn addiction, and two psych hospitalizations, one of which I am proud to say was voluntary. I endured the heartbreak of learning my adopted son is autistic, and the crushing realization that I had inherited my father's violent temper as well as mom's fruit-basket of mental illnesses.

But, somewhere along the way I also found a wife who wouldn't quit on me, a boss who cared enough to order me to get help, and a God who loved me, warts and all.

But nothing prepared me for The Ponies. After my mother's suicide I had gone numb; all I had felt was pain and anger and sadness and never been able to deal with the mess inside my head. With the help of my therapist, I began to realize that trapped inside my wounded psyche were two splintered halves, fighting and hating and longing for each other.

But now I could name them: I called one half Fluttershy, and the other half Rainbow Dash, and I spent a month vomiting a thirty page clopfic full of kind, loving, mixed-up ponies who did violent, cruel, abusive things to each other. But at the end, the two halves finally understood that they had done those awful things to each other they were sick and scared, but they had never stopped loving each other.

And so finally, after 30 years, I began to forgive my mother, and myself, and start to knit a wounded psyche back together.

All because of a bunch of cartoon ponies. Go figure.

You really want to know my story? Read Yellow & Blue: A Tragic Tale of Friendship. The author's epilogue "I am Fluttershy" tells my story.

============
InkTapper, I think you were right in a previous post about similar groups out there, like "Thinking of Suicide? Talk With Us." You're right that it's hard to get people to share in a group this small, and this kind of desperately needed support requires a "critical mass" of people to share their hurts and hopes.

Maybe the best way to honor Daemon67 isn't to start a new group, but add your voice to a larger group of people on Fimfiction preaching the same message we are here:
You may be hurting, but you are not alone. We can't lead you out of the darkness, but we can shine a light to let you know there is a way out. You don't have to bleed on the outside just to let someone know you're bleeding on the inside.

I know this is probably not what you were expecting to hear, but of all the support groups I've been in (and trust me, at 50 that's a lot) the bigger the support system the better.

Hi, I am Annie, DeamoN67's (Matthew) Mother. I live in Australia, and am so grateful that a group like this is now available for anyone who is having a hard time.

I am 49 years old, and have a daughter who is 12, (Matthews half sister, whom he adored.) I am currently unemployed, having lost my business in 2011, and then my job back in May this year. Everything happens for a reason, and if I had been working, I wouldn't have had the 2 weeks of the school holidays with Matthew, and his sister. I don't stress as much as I used to, because nothing seems quite so important any more.

To be able to pour your heart and soul out anonymously, and get such awesome, understanding advise, from a whole range of different people, of different ages and experiences, is such a comfort to me. Maybe if Matthew had access to a site like this, then maybe he would still be around now. If you spoke to him before he died, do not feel you let him down, he had decided I believe, now looking back, that he was going to take his life, regardless of what anyone said. As his Mother, I had no idea, that he felt this way.

Matthew had Aspergers, which meant that he viewed the world differently. He lived with his Dad, who I believe also has Aspergers, but hasn't been diagnosed. His Dad constantly nagged him about his grades and told him that he was going to be a deadbeat on welfare. Asperger kids need to be told what and how to do things, not just told to "do better at school".

His Dad also didn't believe or understand the Asperger diagnosis, and continually told Matthew that he was the way he is because of my poor parenting, and that I had made him that way. Matthew began to believe his Dad, despite specialists reports, his Dad knew best. And it was my fault.

I now watch this site, hoping that I might see a troubled person that might benefit from some kind words and encouragement that they are not alone.

I don't think you need large numbers of people to support one another, it is not our story that is important, when we reach out with love and support to someone who feels alone, sad, deserted, helpless and hopeless.

I thank Ink Tapper, and the other moderators for having the compassion to start a group in Matthews memory. And if just one person no longer feels desperate, then it is a precious site, and so very important that it is here.

1792683

1797380
Alas, my mane is not frizzy. It is completely flat

But on the plus side, it goes from brunette to red tinged during summer

You did not reveal much of yourself, any reason? I'm also aware that your OC was drawn by a talented young artist by the username "theviciouskiller". Can you share the pic please?

1797819My hair is actually a lot like yours

Here's the pic she drew;

Here is me irl, from like a month ago, so my hair is a wee bit longer now (I never had curly hair):

1804283
I feel obligated to reference one of Sweetie Belle's lines here:

I really like her mane! ~Sweetie Belle

You know, minus the gender-worded part

Seriously though, that's nice hair. I'd post a pic of mine, but my laptop is demolished and my phone is only 380p or so
I will reveal my name though. It's Grant. My father named me that because he "couldn't think of anything better"

Personally, I think he's just an egotist

I like the OCAny hints as to his story?

1794484
@Annie, thanks for sharing that. It took me 30 years to realize that there was nothing I could of done to prevent my mom's suicide. I hope you are able to find that truth in yourself much sooner than I did.

My son is also an Aspie, and we do everything we can to let him know how special and unique his talents are. I don't believe it was any accident that God placed him in the care of me, recovering mental patient, and my wife, a pastoral counselor, two people who could both understand and be there as he struggles toward the amazing man he will be some day.

Mental illness is, in my opinion, the shittiest kind of evil there is. I'm not sure it can be vanquished, but I'm pretty pleased that I've been able to give it a kick in the crotch a few times!

1808611
Thank you, I know that this was his decision. Perhaps if he had shared more with me, I could have made him feel more special, however, his Dad was always so negative, and critical of me, that I could not win that battle. We baked, played board games and went on outings together, as I tried to teach him life skills.

I am far from perfect, and always acted in what I have thought was in both kids best interest. I have no regrets, just disappointed that he felt that he had already wasted his life at 17! He had so much yet to experience.

He hid a lot of what his Dad was saying from me, because he wanted me to believe that his decision to live at his Dads house was the right one. He wouldn't have wanted to admit that living with me gave him better opportunities. I had more rules, his Dad had none, other than withdrawing the Internet as punishment, not working out how to schedule time for everything, he was left unable to cope.

I miss him so much. I know that I am not to blame.

1807630Thanks My name is Nicholas.

No idea. It's what she drew. What do you think of his story?

1812519
Analysis time:
Well first off, he looks like a gentleman (gentlecolt?) with his attire and style, the Cutie Mark only further emphasises tthis. Speaking of which, I cannot tell if that is an apple or a rose in the right side. If it's an apple, he might have earned it out in Apploosa, helping the orchids grow in such harsh conditions by caring for them. If it's a rose, coupling that with the heart, he might be a poet. Lonely nights on 'the trail', you have to keep occupied

His style definately tells me he is comparable to Braeburn in both mannerisms and his place in the world. Maybe a deputy or something?

And the Stetson. I'd be willing to wager he's related to Applejack.

Apart from that, I got nothing. Have you done anything with him?

1814577No I have not. This is great!

And... that's a pretty good idea of what I'd probably make myself as an OC I ain't southern (lives in southern California), but I do love the country and "the trail"... and AJ

1815089
<---Totally didn't blush at the compliment

Applejack is definately awesomeAnd the silence of a lonely walk is often very nice too. I used to live on a farm when I was about six or so. If only I could have appreciated it then

I don't trust myself enough to make an OC. It would be the ultimate John Doe

Southern California? I live in AustraliaHow is it up there around this time?

1815158*hugs*

I live in San Marcos, California, specifically. Right now it's nearing on 10:30pm. It's somewhat cold out, but not very--cold enough for a sweater if you wanted, I guess. The sky is clear, but there are so few stars for some reason.

I know someone who lives in Australia on here! You know Stiggerzz?

My first OC is Cherry Garden

1815176
*returns hug*
Know Stiggerzz? I let him watch me roleplay

He lives in Western Aus though. I live in New South Wales. Else I'd hit him up for a turn of GTA V

Sounds nice up there. I like taking walks out at night. So relaxing
"Cherry Garden"? I have never heard of her. Willing to share?

1815613

Know Stiggerzz? I let him watch me roleplay

Can you hit him up online?

Depends on the weather, but it is nice, generally. Really wanting it to rain and autumn to come: it's been so dry of late

How's it over there? Do you live near the coast?

EDIT: Cherry Garden

1817790
Only through here. I'm sure if I tried hard enough, I could find his X-Box gamertag or Steam account

Over here is reasonable. The weather is going to be real hot in Summer, but that's just incentive to visit the beach
And yeah, I live a half hours drive from Newcastle. Not exactly the coast, but it's still a good enough area.

Also, it seems there are neighsayers over at her group

1818570Oh? Cool! Summer coming for you, and winter for me

Yeah. Some brony's, at least then, has been going around disliking me a bunch with no comment

1823225
It's probably that you're relating her to Van Gough. He... isn't the best recieved artist
Other than that, it's either them being arsehats and/or trying to troll

And I freakin love Winter

What kind of music do you listen to?

1823770...Maybe...

Winter ain't really "winter" here, but it can get cold sometimes, and if we are lucky: rain!!!! (it's a warm day today, tho. Clear blue skies)

Mozart, Vivialdi, Pony and Brony, some Pink Floyd, and various songs of folk (various cultures, like Chinese and Native American...), rock, etc I like.

Yourself?

1824953
Here's hoping you get some downfall then

I listen to pretty much anything, but lately I'm fixed on EDM

Of course, I listen to other stuff too. Frank Sinatra, ACDC, some of Claire Corlette's (Sweetie Belle's voice actor I think) covers, anything that I can tap my hoof hand to really. And anything with actual deep emotional meaning.

I love how we've taken over this thread

But yeah, that's my musical prefferences. You have any pass times? Aside from writing and Brony related things, naturally

1826568Sweet!

We haven't yet. Oh, and sorry for the late reply

We have, haven't we?

Well.... Reading, walking, some art, looking up stuff I like, little parkour.... that encompasses more that it lists.

Yourself, my friend?

1847016
No problems friendo

Well I'll occasionally get an idea and try to write it down, draw a little. Apart from that, reading, culinary arts etcetera... I also enjoy excercise in general. I have no real fixed hobbies, but I do different things when I feel like them. Research mostly

I'm so sorry I have to ask this, but who is best pony?

1847537 I have a whole bunch of ponies I like (most of them being Earth ponies, for whatever reason)

But when it comes to "best" I'd say it's a tie between Fiddles and Peachbottom (both are on my page, on the left, above my bio)

Best pony questions never starts arguments with meI always find them interesting and fun

So, I'll one up ya:who is best pony and why?

1851334
I'm at a crossroads between Trixie, Octavia and Fluttershy

But minus that, all pony is best pony

1855395"All pony IS best pony"

1858590>>1855395 Sorry, just felt like breaking up the chat alittle and show that there are more then just two people here .

1858615Hi~~!!
How are you?

1858625 Not too bad, I should be sleeping but I've got some stories to read and writing to do.
How are you this fine morning/afternoon/evening/night/day?

1858645
A little after 4pm here.
I'm alright. Just ate nigh but an hour near two ago my late lunch. Been mostly answering and commenting (chiefly commenting) on a sudden unusual massive influx of things on FiMFic. Should be writing or reading, but it's far too loud and distracting on my end

1858674 I know how it feels. I've been trying to balance between helping people and getting my unread chapters down (I'm down to 69 1/2 atm). I'd like to work on my own stuff and my read latter list which is over 300 but too little time, too much to do.

1858759>>1858674
*Inkie Hug!*

1859901
*Ty-Lee hugs*

1858615
Fair enough
How's things?
1858590
I'm trying to figure out why Twilight Velvet isn't as popular as Twilight Sparkle
She's adorable.

1860947She is!!! Needs more love

Should I make a group for her? Like I do for so many great ponies without a group?

1860947
Made the group, but I don't know about pics or descriptions. So if you join, you'll be an admin and canmake changegs

Click this link

1859901

1860947 Not too bad, got started on a new writing idea. I never knew how hard it really is to read yellow on white or light gray on white.

Hi there. I guess you can call me by either Allen, my real name, or UnparchedButter, my FiMFiction handle. I frequent another group, Anti-Depression ponies, and it was brought to my attention that I could do some good here, too. So, uh.... here goes

A bit about me:

I'm 28, male, gay, an atheist, and I live in central Arkansas. I attempted a degree at music education, but around my second semester my then-undiagnosed mental disorder began to manifest itself. The details are not pretty, and I'll spare you them unless you ask. Let's just say that growing up in a small town, shy and sheltered, with only the vaguest idea of who you are, and then running off to college and having to figure out all of that in a hurry, plus a mental illness? Woof.

Anyway, I eventually wised up, realized that something else was going on, saw a doctor, and got diagnosed with bipolar disorder. It's taken me a few years to come to grips with it, and my college career hasn't recovered, but just having the diagnosis and learning my own private warning signs has been a tremendous help.

Some more random facts:
- My favorite pie is rhubarb.
- If I reach out to my bookcase, without looking, the very first book I grab is....Walter Lord's "A Night to Remember". Other books in that particular pile include the first two Harry Potter books, Jay Anson's "The Amityville Horror", H.G. Wells's "The War of the Worlds", a couple of Oscar Wilde plays, a James Bond book, and some Discworld. Directly in front of the pile is a small plastic kangaroo figurine.
- My go-to episode when I want to watch some ponies is "Lesson Zero".
- I need to restring my bassoon's tenons and I'm not sure what color to go with.

So, uh. Yeah

Anyway, my main goal in joining this group is to listen. I'm pretty busy during the week, so weekends are the best time to actually catch me on the site, but PM's are always, always, always welcome, regardless of what you need to talk about

I joined this group to possibly help others, i personally do not count my self with having any major problems psychologically, and while i would say it's fair to call me a social reject i would not say that is an issue that i need help with.

It appears most need someone to talk to and to share there problems, therefore i joined this group in the hope providing that kind of assistance.

1793304 Also i have been wanting to play Dungeons and dragons for quite some time now but can find no one who even remotely enjoys it if you need extra players look me up some time i would love to play.

3161305 Right now, I have no clue how to setup anything online. Also anything I do run will likely be more silly and messed up then anything else.

Hello. I am <insert name here>. I am 14 years old, I am socially rejected and teased a lot by people at school. I've recently been getting a lot of crap on this site ever since one of my stories go on here and everyone hated it and all. I don't have any friends of my own gender and I get bullied quite often. I was molested when I was in 6th grade and I am finally starting to forget about it. I joined this group hoping I could help some people out and get some help as well.
I attempted suicide on Febuary 24, 2015 and was hospitalized for 6 days. It was the worst six days of my life.

Hi I'm Aaron I'm blind a bit

I don't want to share my name but I am a 14 year old in middle school and all things considered I should be perfectly happy with my cause of good grades, loving family, and good school. But when I was in around fourth grade I got a concussion and it really hurt so after school round 1 AM my head felt super horrible and I had to go to the E.R. and get a cat scan. My skull was okay but I had a concussion and after that I had a harder time remembering things and started to feel depressed. I believe in sixth grade I had another concussion from falling out of a tree. I blacked out from that and my depression got worse and I started getting easily stressed. One day during gym I said duck you to someone with dual middle fingers and like three days after that I got so depressed I wanted to kill myself. I told my mom and she brought me to a hospital to do an outpatient program. Before I continue I should say depression runs in my family. After that outpatient in about three months I felt like that again and had to go back and for the rest of the year I was okay. In seventh grade I felt like that AGAIN and went back to the hospital. Then after a couple months I started feeling homicidal and I went to a different hospital. Then in eighth grade, which I am currently am in, I went to the hospital for suicidal thoughts. Currently I am fine to a point that I'm not in the hospital but I'm still feeling depressed.

Call me Sabata, the who no one cares about.

1792141
Oh, it seems I never introduced my self when I joined..
Hi, I am Keam. I joined this group when I was struggling a lot on the inside. I wish I could say i'm doing much better but I'm really not...I've just gained more control, more knowledge of what it is that make me struggle...

My list of troubles are long, and i doubt any want to read it, but here we go:

I've been bullied for a long while, escaping it completely about one and a half year ago

I over - dramatise

I over think most of my thoughts and emotions, sometimes to the point when I can't tell if they're real or made up or if I'm over-dramatising.

I'm overlt sensetive emotionally
My emotions go on crazy trip at night. I get sad happy confused bittersweet all at once and I don't know how or why. I usually get it out of me through either sleeping or writing poetry blogs.

I always seek personal and emotional connections to everything around me
I got social phobia for the strangest things, and it sometimes creat conflicts in my life.

Well, that’s me. Nice to meet you, I guess.