Good Afternoon.
Yearning to have your story reviewed honestly and thoroughly by a professional, paid editor who is actually, professionally paid for his editorial labor?
Don't want to pay him?
Keep yearning.
Wait... no! That's what this group is for!
I have the fortunate position of paying my bills through literary editing, writing about editing, and generally manning the gates between published, marketable words and everything else. If you would like your story roughed up by such a ruffian, drop it in the inbox.
I will no longer critique stories unless they are submitted to this group.
Disclaimer follows:
1) My opinion will be stated in concise and athletic diction. It will be honest, but it will not be nice. If you prefer a velvet delivery, there are other groups available.
2) I will give an opinion along the lines of what one would get from most professional literary editors.
3) I rate your piece as a work of fiction. Not fan-fiction or pony-fiction. Fiction.
4) I don’t point out grammatical errors unless they reoccur prodigiously and damage the whole of the work.
5) I will get to the story when I can. I’m married. I have kids. I have a job (editing!). Patience.
6) Did I mention I’m not nice? Not when it comes to words, anyway. If you’re very sensitive to criticism, don’t submit. To clarify, I will not "bash" or "tear down" your work, but I will also not gloss over poor writing or pay complements where they are not due.
7) No clop. I've never written or edited erotica and I'm not starting now. Sorry.
8) Submission to this group means I will review, point out continuity errors, logical occlusions and fallacies, pacing issues, and just plain bad diction. It doesn't mean I will become your personal editor. I'm already the personal editor to over a dozen published authors, and they pay me. I do edit pony-fics (for free) though. It's a labor of love. PM me for that.
If I really like your story I’ll tell you about the time I called Frank Steinert a schmuck and didn’t get fired.
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Sincerely,
Hierophant
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Addendum: If a user submits another author's story, I will affirm consent with the creator prior to review.
Yeah! By the looks of it, I get both the criticism of a professional critic and certain harsh expectations. Just what I need
I'm not here to see the continuity errors, but at least I know something about my writing and sentence structure that I didn't know before so I can fix or make better decisions in the future. I'm also mostly focusing on two chapters in particular about Vinyl's backstory. So... I'll guess I post it then
This kind of group is what the site needs, not groups like "Shit Stories" and "The Trash Bin". Groups that encourage critique, not crappiling.
376836
Well, let's see if my next one passes muster... if you're even still around. It took a long time to get ready.
376836
A bit intimidating, I'm sure.
If you can tear a story that good to shreds, I'd
hatelove to see what you'd do to most of the drek on fimfic!375426
I wish you the best in your aspirations.
The best part was, after I posted your review, about four people yanked their stories.
362014
Now that I've seen one of your reviews, I have a new Fimfic goal.
I want a green stamp from you.
I may start attempting to write commercial fiction before then, but if I can get that, I'll know I'm ready.
371153
At least I can go to my grave with the cozy fact I insulted a billionaire to his face.
But that's a victor's spoil.
I'd love to hear about that
Hi.
I like to see choices, and since there was only 1 story in the in-box, I supplied a few new and hopefully fresh stories to go over.
Most of them are short, and I guess some would call even my losgest stories short.
Oh well, if you choose to read any of my stories, I hope you will enjoy them along with anything else you read.
Thanks.
364948
Move it back to the inbox. I'm a nice guy (contrary to the banner). I'm here to help.
364947
Also what is your policy on re-submission if the author tries to fix the problems you point out?
364767
As long as the sentences are complete, the story doesn't need to be.
Do you prefer stories to be completed before looking them over or is an incomplete one okay?
363304
Good catch. Addendum added.
363242 Aha, found it. I didn't consider that, because mature is inextricably linked to erotica in my mind.
Should I smile that you put your own story in the red-stamp folder?
Okay, I've thought about this a bit, and I'm going to drop the short story I've worked hardest on in your suggestions box. Nothing ventured, nothing gained! Please tear it to shreds so later attempts may be improved... if you have the time, of course.
Oh, and one note. People who are not the author adding stories to groups is a thing. I have no idea if it tells who submits, or not... just thought I'd mention. I didn't see anything on it in your disclaimer.
363192
I've edited every literary genre except erotica.
The story is rated mature, so if you're filtering for mature content you won't see it.
This... is really cool. I sort of want to try, but I'm a little scared.
Out of curiosity, is there a specific genere you edit for? (I have no idea how that works.)
Also, the group claims it has one story. But upon searching your folders, it's not apparent. Any idea why?
362014
Will do...
When I have a big story almost ready.
I've only just begun on several big projects at the moment, so that will be a while.
362010
PM me the link.