TLove In Bloom

• Equestria Girls
• Romance
• Drama
• Slice of Life

A fateful meeting at the park draws an introverted artist and a popular schoolgirl together under an unexpected turn of events.

• Alt. Universe
• Sunset Shimmer
• Wallflower Blush

SunTwi06 · 6.7k words  ·  36  2 · 845 views

Review: Love in Bloom

Tags: [Romance] 70%, [Drama] 90%, [Slice of Life] 100%, [Alt. Universe] 100%

Summary: A love interest between Sunset Shimmer and Wallflower. A power of love and a power of friendship relationship.  Not only that but, gosh dang they both go through hardships. This is highly emotional.

Detail analysis:  Like I said earlier this is a deep highly emotional relationship.  If you grew a tear under your eye then you're saying to yourself it’s 100% satisfying.  Bonding is what this fiction did so great.  I can’t say any more words than that.  {waaah it’s too beautiful} This is much better than clop for sure.  (most clops do miss this intentional emotional bond.)

This needs a sad tag. If crying for something beautiful I don’t know what is.  (no i’m just having an enthusiasm moment when i’m writing this.)  This is good but however this still needs a few more things to polish like the punctuation for example.

Grammar score is at least an 8/10 Gosh this big and it’s almost perfect.  It needs the love polishing.

Flow score is clearly a 9/10… I clearly love the flow in this fiction.

Idea score is clearly a 8.5/10 it’s no 8 but it’s not a 9… here is why there are other fictions of sunset shimmer and wallflower.  It depends on the user how to make them bond that include the scenes, what they say, and other etc such as emotional problems like they did in mlp tv shows and even equestria girls.  Everyone will have bad moments of themselves. That’s what this fiction is about.

Dialogue is good and has its moments. I give this at least a 9/10.  Here is why. Brining the characters to life is a hard thing to write these days and this. This made it very good.  

Total score  

34.5/40

8.63/10

7467793 Sorry for the late reply and thank you. It would've been better had I gotten an editor but unfortunately, I could find out.

7467884
I highly recommend the tutor online grammar it's free the use is an A.I for past tense grammar... and Microsoft Word as well.. free... I use word for punctuations.

7467986 Is there a link for the former?

7468103
for word and the A.I grammar tutor? i'll send you a link in dms

7468104 Oh that reminds me- I did want a certain story I worked on over a year ago to be reviewed as to know what is good/bad/in-between but never got a chance to get said review from anyone. I just summited it into this group. Any advice would be lovely

7469272
i'll take a look at it. however i'm doing the UnFetish Business. which is your work.