'I looked at the reflection, and the beast looked back.'
Viktoria had never seen the mirror before, now she wishes she had never examined it. With her body twisted into a strange and unsettling new shape she must become accustomed to her new equine form before finding a way home, and along the way also return her body to normal. Her body betrays her with each movement, muscle memory working against her. Will the newly encountered Flitter and Cloudchaser be able to help her?
Even with the new addition of wings to grant her flight and escape, Viktoria has never felt more confined.
'Others see me for what I am. I only wish for them to see me for who I am.'
( Thanks go to AkuOreo for such a lovely cover art! )
( Also, seems to have a Tv tropes page in the making! )
Wow that was fast, now I have two stories to read.
Bwha? A second story, by the author of 'A Voice Among the Strangers'?
YES PLEASE!
twilight.ponychan.net/chan/arch/src/130929375736.png
Hells yeah! So wonderfully descriptive with her confusing new body, and knowing how well you do pacing I can't wait to see her slowly learn how to use it. I also can't wait to see how she'll integrate with Equestrian society~
Oh am I going to love this, great first chapter!
*insert joke about Victoria's Secret here*
That's exactly what I want to read when I look into an Human turned pony in Equestria story.
Hmm this is a really interesting first chapter. I'm torn between which of the releases I prefer.
Also it nice to see Flitter and Cloudchaser in a story that isn't clop. They have some of the coolest designs in the show, I kinda wish they were used more often.
Will be interesting to see how this continues. Also I love the stories name, its really unique, nothing quite like it.
This weekend cant get better
Oh, it's by Tystarr? Guess I should read it.
3128644 that was my exact reaction.
Finished reading A Stranger Among the Voices, time for Solitary Pinion!
Actually, I already finished. Very interesting, rarely seen start for that kind of story.
And coming from you, it's only going to get places!
Keep up the good work!
i love realistic in stories changing species is traumatic and trying experience it nice how she doesn't have to learn a langue or have trouble understanding other ponies but i so can see speaking with a new tough can be hard and flying is out of the question that kind of stuff is practice as a little child, the history and lessons of pony society, the legal system and ponies also don't write in English letter and death height city with no safety nets to save you from a fall. o boy so much is gonna go wrong for her since she a no one in this land without a bit to her name no matter how nice ponies are bad things happen there are some bad ponies.
i bet her friends/annoying family as frantic scared for her by now and is searching for her in that house.
Two stories? By one of the best authors I've ever read?
Hay yeah!
To be honest I was a bit worried I would not be as interested in this story as I was with A voice among the strangers.
I am very happy to say that my fears have been put to rest. THIS IS EPIC!
I think you'll have better luck with this adjustment issue vs. the language barrier of the previous story, because while people can pick up a new language pretty quickly if they really have to, who knows how long it takes to learn a completely new body. And after she gets the basics of walking across a room, there's still plenty of awkwardness of movement to improve. And I'm sure running will be a new challenge after walking, not to mention flying!
PONYS SPRECHEN DEUTSCH! ICH KANN MIT PONYS SPRECHEN! *ToTZ stirbt der Glucklichkeit*
Anyhow, this looks very good, and knowing the author, it probably will be. I look forward to more!
Tystarr does not disappoint.
Do you really have to put much effort in writing, or do you just sit in front of the computer and let it flow?
If it's the former, you're doing a really good job of making look like the latter.
Also, just for future reference, the hair covering an equines body is referred to as hair, not fur. The difference between hair and fur is that fur has multiple layers, whereas hair has only a single layer.
3128417
Victoria's secret is is that she's a winged horse.
Snrrk?!
I wake up and have almost 500 notifications? O.o
Silly stories getting approved when I am sleeping. z.z
3128375
Huzzah! ^-^
3128408
I hope I do it justice!
3128410
I am glad you like so far. I am trying to go on a slightly different spin with this and keep the 'adventure' in it. Outside of course the initial getting used to her body and all.
3128417
Viktoria's Secret.
...
Would she look good in fishnets?
3128463
I am glad you enjoy. ^-^
3128523
I just had to use them, I was looking up background ponies and both jumped out at me, especially Flitter. Cloudchaser has some lines/screen time but her poor sister(?) doesn't really. All I know is that they both foalsit occasionally.
3128572
o.o
Pressssure. x.x
3128644>>3128693
Don't do it, it's a trap!
Oh wait.
3129337
Yay!
Wait, who is the other one? o.o
Is it me? Do I have split personalities? I blame Ebony!
3128807
Thank you for your time to read them, I am glad you enjoy. ^-^
3128970
Poor Viktoria will have a bit of a journey ahead of her. Let's just hope for her sake she's not in Equestria long!
3129412
Hee, thanks. ^-^;
3129493
I think there is a looooong road ahead before she attempts flying, or maybe she will do so early. Who can say! I certainly am not telling. :3
3129506
Yes, just how are the silly ponies speaking te germanz? Or are they?
-Shifty eyes.-
3129685
I am aware of the fur/hair thing, but Viktoria probably isn't overly concerned at the moment. Don't worry, she will be corrected in due time! Maybe... ^-^
As for how I write? I sit and write... I guess. I do a little bit of brainstorming, writing ideas on paper but that's more a vague idea of the beginning, middle and an end. I might get a really good idea (For example what happened to Tala in AVAtS with a unicorn - no spoilers here!) and just have to write it in.
Otherwise it's just blarghing everything out! I wrote the first chapter of 'A Stranger Among the Voices' almost in one sitting over about 5 - 6 hours. Not sure if that is good or not, but my wrists were really sore afterwards. x.x
Thank you all for the comments, sorry took me so long to respond!
3129974 Too late. You are a really good writer by the way. Normally i would say that mindlessly following someone or like buying every Mario game just because it is Mario is really shallow thinking but in the case i will go with "Damn good heuristic". Yeah, that feels right.
3129974
So yes, the words just flow straight out of your brain, through your fingertips, and into the computer. A lot of people would sacrifice a great deal to have that kind of natural talent. Just don't over-exert yourself trying to do to well, and you will continue to make masterpieces.
You intended the fur/hair mix up?
i1.ytimg.com/vi/7pSmhZFbCy0/mqdefault.jpg
Gersp! You tricky bugger!
Mirror Mirror, on the wall
turn to pony and take a fall.
Oh, would you look at that. She's good... really really good.
Putting thought into stories is important and this is nicely done
man this is certainly a great start as well. mabey with enough practice she can stand on her hind legs, in "the magic duel" zecora was able to stand upright with ONE hind leg.
That was more intense than I expected. But good. The title is reminiscent of another "in a strange body" fic I like, but I imagine this will be far less dark than that one.
It's funny, as I was reading this, I knew from the description that this was going to be HiE, but I was hoping she would be turned into a pony and stay on Earth, but in the same situation as she faces in Equestria.
Or maybe the mirror being a switch, turning her and her friends into ponies and back at will.
But this will be just as good IMO.
It is nice to have a fic with Flitter and Cloudchaser where they aren't having sex with Thunderlane. Or Rumble. Or both. Or each other. Yeah we need more authors like you who don't treat our background ponies like cheap playthings.
One note, you say early on when she cuts herself that she swears in German. This is very awkward since she is only speaking German to begin with. You could leave out mentioning the language entirely until she meets the sisters.
3131167
Earth may or may not play a part in this HIE. I did say there is a reason I wasn't going to do a separate pony on earth story!
But is that the sequel to AVATS, this or both! Will have to see. I will look at removing the German curse mentioning. I also hope I end up doing Flitter and Cloudchaser justice, they seem such lovely sisters and wish to reflect that.
Both this and A Stranger amoung the voices are featured on the home page.
Awesome
as a born german i have to say that i kinda liked that cursing part... maybe it's because i can i imagine what she may have said? than again it's strange when you say that the ponies are talking in german and then they don't
anyway i loved A Voice Among the Strangers and i think i will love this one too. thanks for all your hard work
Holy moley! Two new stories, two great starts, I wish your muse, your hands, and your sanity the best of luck.
Wow, looks promising, wish the chapter was longer however.
Of course! If only Jessica had spoken German, everything would have been fine.
3132786
I don't doubt our good friend Tystarr will find a way to fix that
This is good so far, but the mention of German seems odd and unnecessary given that everything is in English. I feel like it would make more sense to switch it to an English speaking background because there are plenty of places to pick from besides the US if you want to spice things up. England, Australia, India, the deep south...you get the idea.
3129844
Not really, if anything her secret (if she does choose to keep it a secret once she manages to communicate with Flitter and Cloudchaser), is that until recently, she wasn't a winged horse.
3131650
I saw! Was more than a little humbling. ^-^;
3132527
Thank you for reading!
3132767
My sanity had its chance, my muse on the other hand is being elusive. >.<
3132786
Gah! I purposely made this one have smaller chapters to accomedate those that prefer it while keeping 'A Stranger Among the Voices' over 10k per chapter to match the original. I can't win. o.o
3133793
Maaaybe not. Things shall be revealed. ^-^
3134693
Don't tempt me!
3137137
I guess it's the same as equestrian being portrayed as english. For the benefit of the reader it is in english, but what they are saying is in another language. If I wrote it all in german would you be able to read it? ^-^
3147276 I know, it just seems like a strange and unnecessary thing to do unless you have a strong reason to have it set in Germany (e.g. many WWII movies are set on the German side but everyone speaks English), but I really cannot see anything to that effect in this story so I feel like it would have made more sense to use an English speaking location.
3147372
Diversity really, and I was asked to do Viktoria from such a place, and I felt it could be fun. I will throw references in but ulimately where she came from doesn't matter. There will be german in the story though, but only small bits.
Ultimately it was more for fun than anything else. Oh... but, yes... there will be a reason later on for it. Let's just say the mirror had to be made by someone and, well... not saying it's related, but something happened in Denmark in 1999. -Shifty eyes.-
3147404 Well, there are generally plenty of "somethings" you can use from all over the world if you want to, and as I mentioned before there are plenty of other more diverse areas of the world that speak English. Frankly, Germany is a lot closer to the US culturally than India which has English as its official language, and there are other more moderate options like England or Australia so it is hard to cite diversity as a compelling reason for picking Germany.
3147429
As I said, initially it was because I was asked too and I thought it would be fun. Given Jessica in the other story was culturally diversitive, with at least three to her name I also wanted something simpler. So the person who initially dared me to write AVAtS I asked where the girl for this one should be from.
It's also a bit of a leftover from the cutting room floor, Viktoria was meant to be tied into AVAtS, but that has since been canned and is now a seperate story entirely. Ultimately it wont play a huge part into this story where she came from, although, it may... I might just be throwing things around here. ^-^
3147276
Well, while your sanity is out galavanting with lil'cthullu about rhy'leh, hopefully that will send your muse screaming back in panic. But heh! I wish you the best of luck in finding it, but know will you do great.
Why does no other HiE turned into a pony fic start like this!?
Are... you an angel?
No seriously, all the words that flow from your hands through the keyboard and into the screen are pure poetry.
OK so, I have this in my read later list... I'll read it once I see another chapter or two released
Interesting so far.
I look forward to the next chapter.
This... I want more of this.
Wow, OK while I'm here is there any more stories you want me to fave i wont even bother reading them, its quicker to just put them there.
The character is an interesting contrast to Jessica from A Voice Among the Strangers. One of Jessica's defining character traits was the loss of her family and friends. Viktoria, on the other hand, is an orphan. She does mention that the other residents of the orphanage are like a family to her, but it still seems to represent a significant shift. Very good.
Ooh...I like this. It's a completely different look at the idea of "human in Equestria turned pony". I must say, this is the first I've seen anyone address the fact that a human in a ponified body would not be used to it at all. I like it. Is there more?
-C.Storm
3181726 If Her track record is anything to go by then yes there will definitely be more coming in the future. She somehow finds the time to write even with work and Physio treatment for her shoulder.
3129974Not in Equestria long? Silly author, that wouldn't make for a very good story if she managed to get Celestia/Twilight to send her home.
Don't know why I didn't read this when you first submitted it. Probably got lost on me somewhere and I thought it was a non HiE or side story to AVAtS. Either way, it was good and I look forward to more.
And finally chapter two is done.
I am really sorry about the wait and hope to get these out far more rapidly now. I wont make any promises though after what happened in the last month. ^-^
Anyhow, hope you enjoy.