Princess, Professor, friend. What more could a pony ask for?
Ten years have gone since she met her first true friends, and Twilight Sparkle has begun to find the past weighing upon her. She always knew that her friends would begin to drift apart with time; she understood that those endless Ponyville summers must end one day. Still, even though Twilight has accomplished her dreams, something is keeping her rooted in the past.
But the bustling, decadent nights in Canterlot are made for sharing secrets, and tonight, an old friend is waiting for her among the crowds. Could a familiar face and a guiding hoof be enough to lighten the young princess's burden?
Enormous thanks to the amazing Shadowsreached for proofreading and editing. The epic cover painting was created by CosmicUnicorn.
Damn. Talk about a hell of a return!
~Skeeter The Lurker
It's a well-written piece of work, but certainly depressing. Spike really got a shit deal in it. Seems none of his six closest friends ever felt the same way about him. He literally grew up with no friends.
Nice... But... how is it an Alternate Universe? o.O
Just seems more like "possible future" to me.
This is a sweet, beautiful story, and beautifully written! I hadn't intended to read it all tonight, but honestly I couldn't stop after getting just a short way into it.
I feel like you found an excellent balance with this story in length and in the elegance of emotional expression. I enjoyed this a great deal.
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What do you mean? I have high hopes in reading this fic. But if Spike is just pushed aside when mentioned... well it plays a factor. Can you please elaborate?
This was the best line, for me. By far. Ahahahaha.
First time reading a RariLight ship and I've gotta say it was amazing.
Wow, that was really really beautiful. I love Rarilight, and this might just be my new favorite.
Another great work!
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Oh don't worry about Spike, he's just not living with Twi anymore, as some years have elapsed since S3.
This is so good, so so good! Somewhere between bittersweet and outright sad but in the best possible way! I can't wait to click over to part two!
Real quick, one little typo: here in the following paragraph of part one, I think you'll want look to be took.
Huge thanks for the encouragement and positiveness, everyone! You guys are awesome.
3239445 I'm honestly on the fence about the AU tag; I'm going to check out a couple of other time-skip fics like 'A Fine Wine' and 'It Takes a Village' to see if they're AU or not. I always assumed speculative-future fics should be, but I'm not 100% sure! (EDIT: Yep, time-skips don't need it, I've scrapped the tag.)
3238911 I really can't see how Spike gets let down by his friends in this. I mean, look at it this way; Spike always had two options. Either he'd grow up, get too big to live in the library, become a 'proper' dragon and leave his friends. Or, he'd grow up, get too big to live in the library, but remain essentially (in his personality) a pony and want to stay with his friends, which is what happens in this story. Point is, no matter what, things are going to change for Spike, and things will be difficult for him. But he's always had his friends; he chose to go and live under the mountain in Canterlot to be near Twilight, who asked Celestia for help, and used all of her influence to get the mines hollowed out so that he could live where he wanted and be near to her. Twilight's stated to have helped him through the change and discomfort of growing up (not to mention stood by him when the ponies in Canterlot opposed him), when they sit down and get a chance to chat, practically the first thing Rarity does is be concerned about his welfare, and I don't doubt for a second that he flies down to Ponyville regularly to visit AJ and Pinkie. The only reason the thought of him makes Twilight feel guilty in this story is because, over the last month or so, she's not been seeing him (or, indeed, any of her old friends) as much as she should, because he reminds her of a past which causes her pain. That does not mean he's been neglected by his friends throughout his entire adolescence. Bottom line is, Spike's been through some tough times (growing up, dealing with his nature and being opposed by Canterlot ponies) but he's always had his friends firmly at his side, and I don't think the story implies at any point that he hasn't.
To tell the truth, I was loathe to include Spike in this at all, because he's in no way relevant to the storyline itself, and any brief explanation of what happened will inevitably miss out details from what's likely a very rich and complex story (as It Takes a Village shows, you can write novel-length fics about Spike growing up). But he's too significant a factor in any time-skip fic to ignore, so I chose to address him in the way I did.
Bleh, sorry for the essay. Hope that clears things up a bit!
3240802 Blerp, thanks for flagging that up, I'll fix that!
3240856 Just finished up part two, it certainly delivered!
Romances like this often feel so Brechtian; you have no doubt of where they're going to end up and you just hope the author doesn't get too bogged down in cliches along the way. Fanfiction as a genre is filled with the exact same romance story done up with any number of different combinations of characters and settings. It is not often anymore that I find myself wanting to read every single word of a story like this, even less that I find myself rereading passages because they're just so well staged and executed that I need to experience them again! More than the sensational writing, you set this whole thing up in a frame of really quite deeply felt and genuine melancholy. The first third of this is really something special, it elevates everything that follows.
This story is superb, your writing is superb, you are superb! Don't ever stop!
This was a wonderful bit of writing. Emotional and compelling.
Good story, but it can be hard to tell who's talking at times when there at the club.
Very nicely written!
Best alicorn and best unicorn? Who could ask for anything more?
I like how the girls' lives have developed. Twilight a teacher, Rarity a renown Canterlot designer, Dash a hotshot Wonderbolt, it's exactly the future lives I'd imagine for those three.
Woah, that was really good.
Is Princess Consort a real title? Seems like that could be a candidate for what Rares might end up as.
And yet another heart-warming and touching romance - and I really missed your style, your pace and vivid and close-to-life descriptions. And yes, this is my first RariLight fic to meet - and I'm so glad it was YOU to bring it to me and other bronies out there! Thanks a lot!
PS: a Princess and her Secret - what a line! A real wonder - a whole world of two loving hearts just in several words! That's real masterpiece!
A true gem. A magnificient piece of writing, a moving tale. Such a rarity: rich, deep, overwhelming, subtle and sad in the most elegant way imaginable. I shall not read a story equals to this one before long. I'm at a loss for words, really. Congratulations
... and thank you. A tale like this one is worth any of the literature I studied
. Offering such masterpiece to your readers is of the highest generosity. I could lavish praise on your style, your story, but it would seem so mundane compared to the beauty you delivered. So…thanks. Just, thanks.
Oh, and please keep on writing. Really, please do.
(Do forget my clumsy English, my reading skills were well enough sufficient to enjoy the depth of your story, but my writing…Is another story…
)
Well I do say this merits a lot more views, alas I cannot help in this aspect, but I can offer congrats on a job well done. Their is so much back history that I feel I should know but the way the story flows you just get the vibe. a+
... Fuck...
I have to compete against this in the Rare/Twi contest?
... God Damn it Ardensfax...
This was really fantastic. That set up was just so melancholy and downbeat, it's the exact sort of future we all worry about, moving away from friends, and just never finding anything that can take the place of what they were in our lives, it made what's really a bit of a stereotypical date into something much more special. I was disappointed with the reveal that they'd kissed, and more so that it was all simply a result of repressed feelings, though. This seemed like the kind of fic that didn't need to manufacture a new back story to tell its story or make us care, but that's exactly the sort of route you took. It works, certainly. It more than works, and it the emotions still felt real. It just seemed like this could have been so much more than just another 'they were always in love' kind of deal. Even so, it's more of lost potential than anything actually wrong with the fic, and it's still great at what it does do.
Good lord, this is beautiful. You build the atmosphere so well; Canterlot feels like a real, living city in this, and all of the scenes had such vibrant detail to them. I could clearly picture the crowded night club with its floating sculpture, and the peaceful garden out away from the noise... even just the transitional setting of the streets crowded with ponies was perfectly realized, with just the right descriptive cues to evoke the setting.
I am of course a sucker for the melancholy feels that come with an "and they eventually drifted apart" future story, which you knocked way out of the park in the first half, but then you moved into the romance, and it blew my socks off. Again, your knack for description made this stuff first-rate, as I could really feel Twilight's tide of emotions as they talked through the night and ended up spilling their hearts out to one another.
Usually, I wouldn't put a story with more than a hundred likes into my Criminally Underrated Stories section on my user page, but in this case, I think this story definitely deserves far more attention than it has gotten. This is one of the best things I've read in a while. You have my respect.
Two more weeks, tops. Then I will have reliable internet service. I will rip this story apart and put it back together, and it shall shine on EqD as a featured fic.
Fuck yeah.
Sorry to everyone for the stupidly slow responding time to these comments, learning to drive has eaten most of my time these last couple of weeks.
3427505 Awesome, thanks! Looking forward to your return.
I've also finally gotten the next chapter of In Her Blood done if you'd still be up for looking over it!
3381864 Thank you so much for the ridiculously nice comment and the signal-boosting!
I'm really glad you feel the city atmosphere worked; trying to get the ambiance right was the main reason I wrote this in the first place, because in the past I've always focused strongly on characters and always left the backdrops a little peripheral. So it's really encouraging that you feel it came off well. 
3328806 Thanks a lot for the critique and encouragement! Honestly, I can see what you mean about the scope being a bit limited by the simplistic backstory. My only defence is that I'd always planned this story to be more about the emotional and ambient 'feel' than the actual narrative; a sort of concept-piece, I guess. It was never really a 'big idea' story, I just wanted to write something shortish and fun, essentially taking a fairly basic romantic plotline and padding it out with the atmosphere and time-skip, etc. But I'm really glad that you felt it generally worked, thanks again for your thoughts on it!
It is writing like this that I crave day in and day out. There are so many average authors on this website that it is incredibly difficult to find those with talent such as yourself.
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Couldn't have said it better myself.
Truly a wonderful piece of work. My only regret is that I didn't get to it sooner.
With what you where trying to do with this story, it worked. A nicely done short romance to boot. Before reading any comments on it. I was far from lost, on that you spent a grate deal of effort into describing the back ground surroundings, and what was going on around them. And without overly saturating the story with them. You kept up a nice flow without offering to many distractions in any given moment. I will have to keep in mind some of your work when it comes time when I get around to finishing any of my stories I have started in the past, and are currently in the back burner, replaced by other projects.
I also need to greatly polish my stile of writing. I am more of a programer, writing in more of a script of events form of structure, rather then the fluid flow of words that make your stories pleasant to read.
I have way too many of "this made that happen and then that after, then this happened next." I really need to get out of the habit of writing that way. It is annoying to read, even to me. 0.o
It is Ok to use in order to get an idea of events down quickly, but it makes a horrible story to behold. In time it can make ones eyes bleed, and your brain go numb.
I just love the way you put it all together. The depictions of emotions you give is what make me keep coming back for more as well. I hope in time I can lean to do half as well for my own stories.
Your imagination on the use of words is hard to touch. I feel I need to update my own vocabulary.
A good variety of words greatly helps to enrich the experience of reading a story. A talent you are far from lacking. I will have to remember that.
Something I wished to touch on. Without giving out too much of the story away. The subject Twilight was dwelling on in the beginning during her teachings. The fear she had that picking apart, and narrowing down the workings of said subject mater into a describable formula representation of it. Had made her feel it some how degraded the profound, personal, meaning it has to an individual. The one she had talked to about it later was more then rite about her opinion on it. Knowing how it works dose not take a way from how one can feel about it. It dose not make it feel any less good in the face of experiencing it first hand. It is one thing to know of it, it is quite another to be a part of it. It is like the difference of driving a car. Knowing how one works dose not make it less enjoyable to drive. In fact it can help one to enjoy it even more. I found this to be true of most things one can enjoy in life. The more one knows of it, the more one can appreciate it. It is like one that sees a 3D CG cartoon. I would say, one that knows how a cartoon is made, or even has made one him or her self can better enjoy seeing another in action. To me, knowing how something works enhances the the experience of partaking in it. It is like writing and reading. The more one knows of the use of words and knows many of them, can better enjoy both reading and writing stories. In light of the worry you had depicted Twilight had on the matter, I thought was a grate plot point, and seemed so much like her to worry about such things. In the end however it was not what was really bothering her. It was just another distraction she was giving herself to help push away what she was trying so hard to not think about, and was what had really been bothering her. I love how you intricately weave such things together to help bring out the diverse range of thoughts someone in your stories may have, to show there personality. You bring each out as one might think one of them would likely be quite well. It makes your stories so much more believable and and enjoyable to a fan of the cartoon, like my self. ^.^
What is better is you tend to add to it, in a way that makes it better. I would love to see a well made animation of any of your stories. Mostly one of A bluebird's Song. Seeing it would be best after a reading of it.
Errrrr. Again, this post was way too long. -.- oh well. ^.^
One little critique. I was a little disappointed you did not give in detail her attempt at dancing at the club. No big deal. It was just one thing that stood out for me I wish you had put in. I was looking forward to see how you where going to describe that one. Then to see it was skipped over and only mentioned in an after thought of how it went on as a small personal note to each to them. It really did not detract from the full story however. ^.^
So I was browsing the new stories of the day when one of them listed a whole bunch of pre-readers in its description. With some time on hand, I decided to check out each one's stories list.
3 months. ~620 views.
This exquisitely crafted work of art is criminally underappreciated. You do a fantastic job of painting a scene so vividly and realistically that I could actually see myself following them around on their date. The leitmotif of melancholy and regret, the tension between self and other...
Authors and words are a penny a dozen here; true gems like this, well... they are a rarity to be treasured indeed.
Great read, great atmosphere. You really did take your time drawing out their dialogue, you could almost label the story 'suspense'. Great work! Greenthumbed!
Wow. Just, wow. I can honestly say I've never read a story quite like this before. I almost expected it to get even heavier with the vivid details. Very well done, I thoroughly enjoyed it.
The romance portrayed in this story is pretty realistic, as can be seen here.
I think that Billy Joel's song "The Night is Still Young" fits this perfectly. No way I could write this well. Awesome job.
VERY well done. Dat atmosphere. Enjoyed reading this one very much, thank you!
This story was simply brilliant: wonderfully romantic, and it conjured atmosphere and emotion in a way I've rarely seen done before. I'm not exaggerating when I say that this was one of the most beautiful pony stories I've ever read, if not THE most beautiful. You're a gifted writer, and I can scarcely thank you enough for sharing this story.
Beyond this, I've got some feedback, too. Here's a typo I noticed, near the end of Part 2:
There's an extra "a" in there before "still".
Also, if you don't mind a bit of stylistic feedback, a little earlier in Part 2, there's this paragraph:
You're using the same construction with an "although" clause there twice in a row; I tripped over that while reading the story, and thought that I'd suggest replacing the second one with a "but".
Again, thank you for a wonderful story.
This was a delightful read. The intimacy in this was well crafted and pleasing.
Fantastic story, you really captured the feeling of a long lost love that began to claw its way to the surface, its still no RariPie but I think it might have knocked RariJack down a notch for me.
Also your descriptions are fantastic, although you almost have too much of them at times, it feels like a few of them were repeating points and actions from just a paragraph ahead, though done in such a way as to not be obviously repeating, no nested blushing is what I'm saying.
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I wish I knew what you where talking about.
Truly, I wish I did! Did I miss something?
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I like those suggestions.
I find myself making way to many of those types of mistakes too often.
Very bad habit.
I found myself way to engrossed in these story's by Ardensfax to look for any possible written blemishes. I am sure such help is preheated. Nice to know a few are looking out and giving some good critique with some alternate suggestions.
As some say, "every little bit helps."
Daww!
I *squee'd* so much as the progression of there hidden love interest began to reveal itself and become more and more obvious with every little subtle hint.
I knew there was a reason I made a group for rarilight stories!
As always you never cease to un-impress me with all your vivid build up and exquisite detail at all angles of the stories progression.
I have always regarded your works as nothing less than inspiring and otherwise perfect in most aspects of what I look for in really well written stories.
Hence why your story, "A Bluebird's Song" is in my top 5 best stories I have read thus far.
Always a pleasure to read your stories,
Stay awesome,
Djponpheonix
/)
I like the story, but to me the style of writing borders on purple prose here and there. Still an interesting story though.
Know that I don't say this lightly. This is a beautiful and delightful story, and I keep coming back to read it. I may have switched to the Twilestia camp for best ship, but I'll be damned I can't help but still love this. You have done a marvelous job. It would be nice to see more of this from you.
Your writing style is thoroughly enjoyable. There are so many great quotes in this story. "It was strange to realise how a pair of wings could leave her feeling so tethered."
How on earth did I never find this before? It says it's in the RariLight group, but... Ah! It's not in the shipping folder. Fixed.
It seems such a shame that I did not find this before today.
A truly marvelous story.
Where has this been all my life?!?!? This was amazing! Thanks for sharing with us...
This story stole my heart, it's so Good I just can't. Twi's worries are so real and the way Rarity and Twi interact is just so natural and pure and good and oh boy this is just really well written
Holy. Carp.
Honestly, I'm going to come back when I've had time to process this epic thing. Mono's been bugging me forever to read it and I'm a blasted idiot for taking so long. This is AMAZING. The dialogue is PITCH PERFECT. I can hear the lines in Tara and Tabitha's voices! The body language is simply amazing, to the point where I want to take it apart and see how it all works. Environmental design, from the pillar of the club to the stunning garden. Let's not forget just how freaking epic Twi's overthinking of everything is, especially the kiss... to the point where she didn't know what to do... only for Rarity to remind her exactly how it went.
I love "near future" fics, showing how the Mane 6 have moved forward past Ponyville. But even then, it shows the characters of both Rarity and Twilight so perfectly. Twilight's gotten friendship down to a science (and Rarity telling her that it doesn't devalue it one bit), while Rarity's become the confident mare we've all known is under there.
But the sheer intensity of the emotion in this story is what makes me stutter. I simply don't have words for just how amazing it is. How well you captured the years of repression. The years of regret. The sense of missing part of life... only to have it all come spilling out like a cracked dam... the tiny movements, the fears being conquered. Twi closing her eyes because she can't bear the thought of Rarity's rejection...
...seriously, I'm still squeeing. Freaking EPIC. EPIC EPIC EPIC EPIC.
Instantly puts the story onto his Legends shelf!