“You give me heart palpitations.”
“Oh. Sorry.”
“No no. It’s a good thing.”
“It is?”
“Mhm.”
“I’m glad!”
“…”
“Pinkie, do you think you could stop squirming around like that?”
“Sorry.”
“Don’t apologize. It’s alright.”
“I just get so wiggly and tingly when I’m around you.”
“Is that right?”
“It feels like I’m full of butterflies.”
“…”
“What’re you thinking, Twilight?”
“Hmm?”
“Your eyebrows are all scrunched together.”
“Oh. I was just thinking… That was really beautiful.”
“You think so?”
“I do.”
“Well, I think you’re beautiful!”
“Pinkie.”
“And you’re super cute when you’re all blushy.”
“Pinkie!”
“What? It’s true.”
“You have no idea how amazing you are, do you?”
“…”
“Come here. Come cuddle with me.”
“I love how soft you are, Twilight.”
“You’re softer, Candy Mare.”
“Maybe I should give the cupcakes a break.”
“No. You’re perfect.”
“Eep! You really like doing that, don’t you?”
“I can’t help it. Maybe if you didn’t make such adorable faces then I could leave your ears alone.”
“Meanie.”
“Don’t tempt me with that tongue of yours.”
“Hmhm! I know you like it.”
“You little minx.”
“Little what?”
“Come here.”
“…”
“Hee hee! You always get all melty, Twilight.”
“It’s because you’re just… astounding.”
“You helped. What? What’s the face for?”
“You don’t give yourself enough credit.”
“For what?”
“For anything.”
“I’m just me.”
“Like I’m just me?”
“No! You’re amazing!”
“So are you.”
“Twilight…”
“Just listen, okay? Let me talk for a little bit.”
“Okay.”
“I’m not a poet, Pinkie. I can’t paint beautiful pictures with words like you can.”
“I-”
“Shh. What I can do is speak plainly and let you know how I feel. You are something completely different; you break so many rules and standards that I just don’t know what to do with you sometimes. Don’t make that face. It’s a good thing.”
“Oh.”
“We’re incredibly dissimilar. We have very little in common, and I often wonder just how in the world we ended up together. Don’t cry, Pinkie. Let me finish, silly filly.”
“O-okay.”
“What I’m really trying to say is that I’m glad we did. You’ve been a positive force in my life, and I can’t thank you enough for it.”
“You’re just saying that.”
“No. I’m being honest. I’ve compiled a list of examples if you’d like to hear them. Don’t laugh at me!”
“Sorry. It’s just that… Never mind.”
“Hmph. Okay then. Answer me this: what Element of Harmony are you?”
“Did you forget?”
“Just answer the question.”
“Laughter, silly!”
“Do you think you’re a good Element of Laughter?”
“… I… I think so. I like making ponies laugh.”
“You’re a great Element of Laughter, Pinkie. I’ve got to admit that I didn’t understand why Laughter was an element at all in the beginning. It seemed pretty superfluous… Um… Extraneous? Unnecessary? Please, Pinkie, just sit still and listen. Stop jumping to conclusions and let me finish.”
“You’re really hurting my feelings!”
“Will you let me finish? Please?”
“… Okay.”
“That was my problem, Pinkie.”
“Jumping to conclusions?”
“No! I didn’t see the point of laughter; that was my problem. I was lonely back in Canterlot, you know? But I didn’t realize that it was my fault or that I couldn’t fix it by getting even further into my studies. Guess who had to teach me the importance of laughter, despite my attempts to thwart her?”
“Me?”
“That’s right. Guess who helped this stuck-up unicorn learn to let loose and have fun?”
“Me.”
“Mhm. Now tell me who keeps me from burying myself under a pile of books and becoming a lonely old miser pony.”
“Me.”
“You see, Pinkie, you are so good for me. You balance me.”
“…”
“Are your feelings still hurt? I didn’t mean to…”
“No.”
“Why are you being so quiet? What are you thinking about?”
“I was just thinking about what you said.”
“And?”
“And I guess that means you balance me too.”
“How do you mean?”
“It’s your turn to listen to me.”
“That’s fair.”
“I was a lonely pony too, Twilight.”
“But-”
“Shoosh. Don’t frown like that! Your face will get stuck and we’ll have to change your name to Twilight Grumple.”
“Fine.”
“I like to throw parties! Parties make ponies happy and I love love love to make ponies happy! But sometimes when other ponies are happy they forget.”
“Forget what?”
“They forget Pinkie Pie. She throws great parties, but she’s not the kind of pony you’d go out to lunch with. Nope. Let me finish. I know why, it’s because I’m out of control. I can’t help it, I just get so excited and I try so hard to get a smile that I go too far.”
“Pinkie…”
“It’s okay! You calm me down. I don’t know how, but you make me slow down and think. I don’t understand a lot of things, but that’s okay because you’ll always explain it to me. You never forget Pinkie Pie, and that is why I think you’re the best pony in Equestria.”
“That’s not accurate.”
“It isn't?”
“No. Because you’re the best pony in Equestria.”
“I think we may just have to agree to disagree here, Twilight Sparkle.
“I think you’re right, Pinkamena Diane Pie.”
“Now who’s tempting who with their tongue?”
“Who’s tempting whom is th…”
“…”
“I’m sorry, Twilight. What was that?”
“I forget. Who cares?”
“Something about tempting somepony…?”
“Get back here, you incredible tease!”
“I can’t hear you over your heart palpitations!”
“You don’t even know what that means!”
“Would you like to teach me?”
“Oh, I'm going to! Don't you worry a bit.”
---Author's Note---
"I'll bet you can't write Twinkie using just dialog."
"There is nothing I won't attempt for the mighty name of Twinkie!"
"Prove it."
So, love it or hate it? If you don't mind mentioning whether or not you got lost as to who is speaking as well that would be phenomenal!
I guess it's also Pinkie's birthday? Happy Birthday, Pinkie!
Adorable and awesome. Full approval, keep 'em coming. :3
You basicly did the opposite of device heratic with this story :P
Anywat this was very cute and there should be more Twinkie
*SQUEEEEEEEE!* I LOVE what you did with this story! Your changing it was TOTALLY worth it!
Yesss.
“Now who’s tempting who with their tongue?”
“Who’s tempting whom is th…”
“…”
“I’m sorry, Twilight. What was that?”
“I forget. Who cares?”
My favorite part.
It is beautiful
I love this; this is so adorable
A-mazing, astounding, incredible. More please.
Twinkie, the sweetest thing known to man.
Sorry Hostess.
Love it! Short but so enjoyable.
first off, minor bit of grammar correction
"not the kind of ponies you'd go out to lunch with"
probably should be "pony" instead
second,
You're awesome. Sheesh, I hope people keep daring you to do stuff!
Great portrayal of poth ponies, as usual. And major bonus for using the balancing, as it's one of the things I like the most about them Oh, and Pinkie cutting Twilight off? Genius. Simply and purely, genius.
A thousand word chapter named Dialog did make me hesitate to read it, but i'm glad i read it anyway because that was fantastic. I had little trouble keeping track of who was speaking through most of it, you had them use each other's names and such often enough that it always remained fairly obvious who was who. Interesting way to write something, very well done.
Stop making me feel so insecure about my writing, damn you!
But in all reality, I do think quite highly of this... Keep up the good work.
Ok, now do one and don't use any dialogue at all!
540504
I'm sorry but I don't know who that is.
540533
That was the most frustrating part. I wanted to take a moment to breathe but I couldn't do anything more than ellipses which I'm still not sold on.
540606
Mine too.
540732
No apologies!
540989
Fixed. Thanks for pointing that out.
541051
You're making me blush. It's always fun to try and make things work! There's nothing more satisfying than hearing it worked.
541200
I was incredibly surprised when it got this long, but I'm glad that it worked for the most part.
541296
I'm sorry! I'm glad you enjoyed.
541449
Alrighty. I'm going to try, but it might be disastrous since dialog is my favorite. Challenge accepted!
541518
RainLight refers to the challenge story that device heretic wrote, Thunderstruck, which is currently in the featured or whatever it is. Part of the challenge was no speaking.
541867
Oh. I didn't even look in the featured box today. Thanks for explaining.
EEEE! Absolutely adorable, love it! >w<
"I can't hear you over your heart palpitations!"
I...I can't stop laughing. Just awesome.
Dear Celestia, it's…
Beautiful.
An all-dialogue story. You're tempting me to very, very bad things. Especially given the wondrous majesty that is English Renaissance Luna. Of course, I also wonder what a clopfic would look like written entirely in dialogue. Something like "Royal Hospitality" would probably still be pretty steamy. Something more akin to the average clopfic would be… not.
543674
To be honest, I have no real experience with clopfics on either side of the fence (reading or writing) but I imagine that it would be difficult to write one purely in dialog. Not impossible, but it would take someone with a heap of skill to pull it off, especially to have it be tasteful as well. I think that if someone managed to pull it off it'd have potential to be incredibly emotionally impactful.
I got a challenge to try the reverse of this and of course I thought that the easiest type of story to write without dialog would be a clopfic, but that's a no go. I'll bet a clopfic by me would be incredibly awkward to read and just make even more people uncomfortable than when I write saucy...
Aaaanyway, being tempted to do things is good. Go, Gabriel. Go and do things in the name of Twinkie.
This is lovely.
540474 I keep seeing your comments on the stories I'm reading. This would be all fine if it didn't remind me of your story, thereby adding extra suspense.
546188
There was a chapter update today on my fic, now that you mention it. Go forth and enjoy!
543823
>"Write a clopfic using only dialogue."
CHALLENGE (maybe) ACCEPTED
546194
I'm very intrigued. You're going to have to let me know how that goes.
I had a tough time following who was saying what, but after a few reads, i finally got it
Well done!
Choice
I've never seen a story done entirely in dialog before. Most excellent work Oh Burrito'd One.
This is excellent! Know you have to do one where there's no dialogue, even if they say things.
This is adorable and even got pretty serious about halfway through. I love this
547932
Sorry for the confusion. Thanks for letting me know, though, because it's hard to know when things aren't clear when you're reading over your own things because you know what's supposed to be going on.
548383
It was an interesting decision certainly. Probably won't do it again, but I'm glad that it worked for the most part.
548544
I'm brainstorming a "silent-story" as we speak. It'll be an experience for sure.
555486
... I really want to. I feel like a horrible person, but I absolutely love drunk!Twilight.
I guess we shall see what comes of it.
For what it's worth, I didn't have a difficult time following which speaker was which.
Fave parts:
“You give me heart palpitations.”
“Oh. Sorry.”
“No no. It’s a good thing.”
Hee! You like this dynamic, I can tell--you've put something like this in a number of these stories, now. (“Is that a good thing?” “It’s the best thing.”)
“I’m not a poet, Pinkie. I can’t paint beautiful pictures with words like you can.”
I love that Twilight appreciates this about Pinkie. This feels like an older Twilight to me, one who's lived and learned a bit--especially the lesson of not judging a book by its cover.
“I was a lonely pony too, Twilight.”
This is close to being my head canon if not ACTUALLY my head canon. I love this interpretation of Pinkie and of what Twilight meant to the other five in the Mane Six.
“I think we may just have to agree to disagree here, Twilight Sparkle."
“I think you’re right, Pinkamena Diane Pie.”
ADORBS. This feels like the way of interacting a well-established couple has, full of little in-jokes and such, and it's lovely.
“I can’t hear you over your heart palpitations!”
“You don’t even know what that means!”
Hee, hee, hee! I love this, and I can just HEAR the tones of voice both of them are using. Might be my favorite part of this entire little scene. I also really dig how the story starts light 'n fluffy, dips into the serious, and then comes back to light 'n fluffy again. I can't help but imagine that most of Twi and Pinkie's Serious Discussions go like this.
you know what would make this story super awesome? coloring the text based on the speaker. I know I know, I should be able to infer the speaker, but if you can unobtrusively make a piece of writing more clear, then you should do it.
I love this series, btw
You know how amazing a writer you are? You are so good that you do not leave any empty room for the imagination. You are so awesome that I can no longer write how awesome you are. So for that I chose to express my praise in the form of emoticons:
That was beautiful
Wow.. this was crazy good. I kept up with who was who. Their discussion kind of encapsulates why this pairing is actually really good and makes alot of sense in the right hands.
It was awesome.
:
Pinkie Pie is best pony. And since she is the automatic winner of all best pony debates, all best pony debates are really just deciding who is second best.
This was great! And so cute. I loved it.