A good start, nice music choice, and it's always nice to see Octavia. I've always liked human Octavia.
Now, a few corrections. "Ditsy Doo" should be "Ditzy Doo", "Doctor Hooves" should be "Doctor Whooves", and "starred" should be "stared". How does one star at a wall, anyway?
*Slow building clap* And so, the first stone falls into place. *End dramatic comment* Nice job bro, and it gave me a few ideas for my Fic. Can't wait to see the rest.
Your "self-insert" might be a pre-med student, but you as an author obviously aren't. To wit:
CPR is done on people who aren't breathing and don't have a pulse, not on people who are napping.
CPR isn't gentle. If you're not leaving bruises, you're doing it wrong. If you're doing it really well, you're probably breaking a few of her ribs along the way.
CPR is not romantic. You don't segue from mouth-to-mouth into a French kiss. More likely you segue from mouth-to-mouth into her vomiting.
Right now? You're not trying to save her life. You're just taking an excuse to sexually assault an unconscious woman. Nice job, self-insert.
412260 Oh, I would have DIED of laughter if she did that in his mouth. Emoticons can't express how ridiculously funny it would be if that happened.
It wouldn't be so bad though.(from the self-inserts perspective) I mean, she's by far the prettiest pony in Equestria despite her lack of green eyes and freckles(I have a thing). And I'm sure it wouldn't taste too bad either. Maybe like tea and something classy people eat. Yeah
not really going to read this
i do nothing
Nice start man! defiantly tracking this ^^
We definitely needed more Octavia
Yay another warehouse 13 fan
LIKE AND TRACK
Wow, I hardly expected it to get so many views so fast. Thanks a lot. I am so going to keep it comming.
Yay another warehouse 13 fan
328329 you should expect everything brother/sister/whatever it is that you are
and I dont see why it would get many views this is friggin funny
A good start, nice music choice, and it's always nice to see Octavia. I've always liked human Octavia.
Now, a few corrections. "Ditsy Doo" should be "Ditzy Doo", "Doctor Hooves" should be "Doctor Whooves", and "starred" should be "stared". How does one star at a wall, anyway?
So far so good Sexy Frog
(Your the first one done with posting your collab fic)
-Silverness
(Also its Ditzy Doo and Doctor Whooves, also you forgot to add the date *Draequine told me to tell you*)
*Slow building clap* And so, the first stone falls into place. *End dramatic comment* Nice job bro, and it gave me a few ideas for my Fic. Can't wait to see the rest.
before: well why not read it
after:.....i'm tracking it
328481 What do you mean I forgot to add the date?
328682 he said that the date is April 13, 2012
328688 Okay? What do I do with that date?
328699 I guess add it to the top in the beginning, "April 13, 2012" and then your story starts
Octavia on Earth? That's new.
O.o I didn't even leave that big a cliffhanger-esque ending. Well played.
THIS is the perfect definition of the ending of this chapter
3.bp.blogspot.com/-uRm3z5RAeUE/TzsXEKfgDII/AAAAAAAAAdc/6fiQLyiahds/s1600/cliffhanger.jpg
There is one thing that is contradictory still
the 13th of April is a Friday, not a Saturday.
I should know, I have my day off then from work due to my birthday two days prior.
Other than that, congrats of getting the first chapter of this mess out. Tracking and seeing where this is going.
NJ ALL DAY!
So you're (it's from the self-insert group) going to be a doc and you start reviving somebody without checking on the pulse?
You can break some rips doing that.
Dude, what the fuck? He's pre-med and he doesn't know how to perform CPR?
369739 I was always told in boy scouts that if you're not breaking ribs, you're not pushing hard enough.
That was... short. The writing seemed a bit patchy in spots, but it's not too bad.
Your "self-insert" might be a pre-med student, but you as an author obviously aren't. To wit:
CPR is done on people who aren't breathing and don't have a pulse, not on people who are napping.
CPR isn't gentle. If you're not leaving bruises, you're doing it wrong. If you're doing it really well, you're probably breaking a few of her ribs along the way.
CPR is not romantic. You don't segue from mouth-to-mouth into a French kiss. More likely you segue from mouth-to-mouth into her vomiting.
Right now? You're not trying to save her life. You're just taking an excuse to sexually assault an unconscious woman. Nice job, self-insert.
So can someone enlighten me? Exactly what is PonyFall?
412260 Oh, I would have DIED of laughter if she did that in his mouth.
Emoticons can't express how ridiculously funny it would be if that happened.
It wouldn't be so bad though.(from the self-inserts perspective) I mean, she's by far the prettiest pony in Equestria despite her lack of green eyes and freckles(I have a thing). And I'm sure it wouldn't taste too bad either. Maybe like tea and something classy people eat. Yeah