Dear Princess Celestia,
Today I learned that the value of true friends has the potential to become infinite, no matter how....noble the search for information may be.
Chapters (1)
Apocalypse Pony
Joined 24th Sep, 2011 ·
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Another Writer's Training Ground fic.
SCIENCE!
Critique welcome as always
I thoroughly enjoyed it. Just remember to break into a new paragraph each time a new character speaks.
Even Vinyl Scratch was standing not too far away from the grounded machine, her grin punctuating the one sided humor in Rainbow Dash’s predicament.
I thought that line was particularly hilarious xD
The only critique that jumped out at me was the wording of this sentence near the start "It wasn’t the nylon and aluminum umbrella she was holding properly opened and pointing toward the clouds, which were dangerously likely to belch bolts of lighting." especially towards the end. "Which were likely to belch dangerous bolts of lightning" or something similar would probably flow better.
It was a fun read nonetheless.
14743
Yeah, I knew that one was rickety. Wasn't sure how to word that sentence, I just wanted to point out that she's a makeshift lightning rod for the sake of SCIENCE
1 pony. Sufficient data?!
NO! SCIENCE IS RUINED!
About the story itself: Very nicely written.