Everfree Northwest 2014 contest entry. Theme: Villains...Rivals....Friends?
Twilight Sparkle contends with an old menace in Ponyville.
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- Member Since 17th Feb, 2014
- offline last seen Jul 11th, 2019
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How was this supposed to make anyone look sympathetic?
4044247
The theme was to give a positive look upon a former antagonist from the series. They don't have to look sympathetic unless I read the prompt incorrectly and if that is the case then I do apologize. I know my writing isn't any good but at had at leas thought that I did the prompt correctly.
4045928
Well, you have Flim and Flam (and Iron Will and Gilda) show up and take over Ponyville, which is generally worse than what any of them, Iron Will especially, did in the show.
I think what you were getting at was having the brothers learn a lesson about leadership, yes? Unfortunately, fixing or learning from a problem they themselves created isn't quite enough, in my opinion, to really make them appear positive. You first take them down from where they were, which is being antagonists, and then bring them up by the end back to that level.
4046895
Flim and Flam brought a lot of ponies into Ponyville to disrupt things. The others he brought were like Snips and Snails. They were willing to follow orders of those that wanted to force a change in leadership in town because they were enticed by promises of gain. They were not the main problem. What was meant for the brothers to appear positive was at the very end when they promised to spread what they learned beyond Ponyville. Twilight realized that they were not bad ponies after all but were misguided by the errant way. The true 'way' is the foundation of a superior leadership which was spoken of early in the story with Twilight promoting mutual ties and friendship between the leaders and the ponies. This was meant as an inspiring attitude towards Twilight beginning to rule as a princess.
Yes, with 3000 word limit, I had a difficult time trying to make this work and this was one of many variants that I had created. I had hoped to have the brothers use the other characters to bully the inhabitants but I had to have their problems be reduced to a smaller narrative. It couldn't work out as I originally envisioned. Fluttershy also had a part which has to be cut but was replaced with Zecora, which is also a voice of wisdom for Twilight in particular. I didn't think that the brothers had to be put in a bad situation necessarily. That would be quite typical and uninspired unless I had more words to work with. But things were looking bad beyond their narrow view. Recall that the brothers gained great riches but the town was being bled. Because the way doesn't allow for governments to do this and without following the way, they often fail and by force. Whether the brothers were able to realize this without Twilight's intervention or not, perhaps things would have turned out badly in the end for them. Also, they aren't emotional by nature. Neither is Discord. They see things in a technical way. It isn't the nature of rulers to be anything but legitimate representatives of the wishes of the ponies. They had to learn more and to go on a journey of fulfillment if they must lead lives greater than those that sell things.
In other words, people would actually have to think to get to the bottom of this and thinking isn't that popular around here from the looks of it. They would rather see a remake of "Keep Calm and Flutter On". Fluttershy and Discord and other normal pairings = super popularity. Anything different? Probably not. If the judges are the same way then I shouldn't have bothered to enter a story at all.
4047449
Sounds like your idea was bigger than the word limit. That's kind of a thing that happens with contest, though, don't feel put out. Consider expanding this after the contest's done!