A New Beginning
“Positioning—checked. Corporal integrity—confirmed.” Twilight Sparkle smiled and shook from enthusiasm. “I finally did it. Everything is precise.” She looked at her static friends and took a deep breath. “Let there be time.”
Applejack cringed then looked around. “Everypony all right?”
“Oh, Applejack.” Twilight’s pupils dilated. “Worrying about others instead of yourself, like you’ve always done. I really love that about you.” She stood up on her hind legs and embraced her.
The six of her friends looked at one another in disarray.
She looked at them with love and adoration that masked a heavy weight of guilt. She had gotten them killed. No, almost killed, because here they were, standing before her very eyes. She had found a solution.
“Twilight, wait, we may not be out of the danger yet.” Applejack wiggled out of the hug and looked up at the rocky slope above the path they were standing on. Everything was still.
“Everypony panic. The rocks are trying to kill me again! The end is near!” screamed Pinkie Pie as she ran in circles among her friends on the calm hillside clearing under the stable overhang.
Twilight shook her head. “Not an end, Pinkie Pie. It’s a beginning! We’re all together, safe and sound. This is a happy time. It is!”
“Relax, Pinkie. It passed, somehow,” Spike said and looked to Twilight, narrowing his eyelids. “I told you we shouldn’t take this shortcut. What just happened is exactly what I was warning you about.”
Fluttershy stopped biting on her lower lip. “What did just happen, exactly? How come it’s over?”
“Yeah, where did all the rocks go?” Rainbow Dash flew up and looked around. “I swear, there was a boulder here about to crush us all.”
“I know a rock slide when I see one” Pinkie Pie said. “And I’m sure I saw one. This one was a doozy, tearing off from the cliff—thrhh”—she imitated the sounds as her hoof trembled in the air—“just as we were passing under it and gushing on the hillside toward us with tremendous force—phooh, the rumblings echoing from every direction—bwam-wam, ground shaking—trr-tr, stones flying everywhere—”
“We all saw it, Pinkie.” Applejack raised one eyebrow as she looked at her.
“Oh, goody, because I must have blinked and missed it. Where did it go?”
“I reckon that rocks stopped—in an instant?” Applejack closed her eyes and shook her head. “No, rolling stones don’t just stop. I honestly don’t know what happened.” She shrugged her shoulders.
“Twilight, dear, did you stop the rock slide with your magic?” Rarity asked, raising a hoof and pointing to her horn.
There was no reply.
Everypony looked at Twilight.
She swayed on her legs. With her jerking gaze, she switched from one friend to another. Her smile almost extended to her ears.
“Twilight?” Applejack tapped her on the shoulder. “Do ya know what happened?”
She bowed down her head, slipped it under Applejack’s neck, and brushed her mane against it. “It’s okay, my friends. You’re all alive!”
Applejack looked down at her with eyelids wide open.
“Twilight!” Spike stepped to her and gently tugged on her mane. “I saw you teleport just before that rock fell where you were.” He pointed to the big rock imbedded in the ground. “The moment you appeared in front of Applejack, all the rumbling ceased. What did you do with the debris?”
She hooked one forehoof over Applejack’s neck and dragged Spike in a hug with the other. “Forget the rocks. We have one another. Our friendship is the only thing that matters.”
“Twilight, what’s wrong? Why are you acting this way?” Fluttershy asked in a soft voice, as though she were afraid of the response.
“There’s no impending boulder here! Why are you assuming something is wrong?” Clenching her teeth together, Twilight put her forelegs on the ground and took a step back. “Nothing is wrong! Everything is certainly fine. Nopony is getting hurt by the boulder here.”
They don’t need to know, whispered her own voice, echoing in her mind. This is a happy moment!
“I love you all!” A tear slid down her cheek. She had saved her friends. She had saved them all!
Fluttershy stepped closer and bowed her head to the same level with Twilight’s. “I can see that something is bothering you. Talk to us. We’re your friends. We’re here for you. You know that.”
Twilight’s tears broke forth, and she sobbed. “I’m sorry I suggested the shortcut. I should have acknowledged that it was dangerous.” She lifted her head with a forced smile plastered on it. “But it’s okay now. Everything is fine. Nopony died!”
“I didn’t mean to upset you like that, Twilight.” Spike reached out with his claw and touched her on the cheek. “I just think you should have at least listened to me before rushing forward, that’s all.”
“Yes, I should have! Your advice has always been grounded. If only I’d listen to you. I should have talked to you more. You know I love you, Spike, don’t you?” I’ve always acted like I took you for granted, but deep inside, you meant the world to me.
He took a step back as if her gaze was pushing on him. His jaw dropped ever lower.
She raised her head. “I love you all. I should have spent more time with each and every one of you!” I’ve missed you all so much!
Applejack leaned her head as she looked at Twilight. “We love ya too, hun’—”
Twilight gasped and smiled. She sat on her flank and clapped with her hooves.
“—but what ain’t you tellin’ us?”
“Nothing is wrong!”
“I didn’t say anythin’ was wrong, but now I know somethin’ is amiss. What’re you hidin’ from us?”
“I—” Twilight looked away from her friends as she sobbed again.
Rarity approached her. “Tell us, dear.” With her dainty hoof, she gently moved Twilight’s head so she could face her. She looked into her eyes. “We need to know.”
“I—didn’t stop the rock slide.” Twilight bit her lower lip.
Pinkie Pie kicked at the rock imbedded in the ground that Spike had pointed to before. The rock didn’t budge; only her tail twitched. “But it has stopped, right?”
“There’s not enough time. I’ve been over it again and again. Nothing I do can stop the boulder above you in time. Not even replicating Shining Armor’s shield spell would work. It takes too long.”
“Sweetie, are you saying we’re still in danger, somehow?” Rarity looked up the cliff and across the clear sky.
“You’re all here. We’re together again. I want to hug each and every one of you!” She embraced Rarity.
Rainbow Dash plunged down. As her hooves connected with the overgrown path, dust scattered in all directions around her. “Enough of your rambling. You need to tell us what happened, and you need to tell us now!”
With a smile on her face, Twilight approached her.
Rainbow Dash half closed her eyelids.
Twilight stood on her hind legs and extended her forelegs toward her.
Putting a hoof on Twilight’s chest, Rainbow Dash leaned her body forward and stopped her approach. “Talk now! Hug later!”
Dropping on all four legs, Twilight sniffled. “Your proximity to the boulder means you’ll be the first one to—” She looked away. “Then, the rest.”
“The first one to what?” Rainbow asked, the tone in her voice a little shaky as her confidence faded upon hearing the ominous words.
Twilight bowed her head, and whispered, “To die.”
Her friends gathered in a circle around her, silently looking at each other in disbelief.
“Are you saying I’m going to die?” She spread her wings, jerkily looking around.
Twilight clenched her teeth and said nothing. They deserved to know the truth, but it gripped her heart in pain just thinking about it.
“Are you saying that?” Spike put his claw on her neck.
“Yes.” She stomped a foreleg to the ground and raised her head. A smile forced itself on her lips again. “But you don’t have to worry about that. You’re safe from the dreaded boulder here!”
“Where is here, Twilight?” Pinkie Pie waved all around her, then drew her pointing foreleg to her face and observed it.
Twilight turned to her. “Don’t worry about a thing; the place isn’t important. Don’t let anything get in the way of who you are. Enjoy the moment. You’ve always been good at that. I love you, Pinkie Pie!” She hugged her.
“Ugh! I can’t take this anymore.” Rainbow Dash fell on her back, extending her legs and wings outward. “Twilight, let me know when you decide to stop being so confusing.”
“What am I?” Pinkie Pie’s mane flattened slightly.
“Oh, darn it! Now Pinkie’s lost her marbles, also.” Applejack facehoofed.
Pinkie Pie turned to her “Don’t you get it?”
“Get what?” Applejack sighed.
“None of this is real. Even we aren’t real.” Pinkie Pie looked at the ground.
“I feel real,” Fluttershy whispered.
“You’re all really precise! I made sure of it!” Twilight said.
“You—made sure of it? How exactly did you do that?” Rarity asked, her voice laced with a tinge of distaste.
“I didn’t know what else to do.” She looked down at Rainbow Dash, who lay at her side, staring blankly at the sky.
“I wanted to talk to you again…” She stepped over Rainbow’s wing spread out on the ground then carefully moved her other foreleg forward, gently brushing against the feathers with her hoof.
Her wing twitched, but she kept gazing up, ignoring Twilight.
She stepped sideways over the lying pony.
Rainbow Dash’s ears pinned back as she lifted her head from the ground and looked at the silhouette towering above her.
“I wanted to touch you again…” Twilight crouched down and locked her forelegs around Rainbow’s neck.
“What the—” Rainbow Dash jerked and shoved her legs at Twilight’s sides.
“I love you, Rainbow Dash!”
She kicked, but couldn’t get an anchor point on Twilight’s barrel. “Help! I’m being assaulted!”
Applejack jumped at their side and tackled Twilight off Rainbow Dash. The pegasus immediately took flight.
As Twilight lay on her back, she smiled at Applejack, slowly extending a hoof toward her.
“Talk!” exclaimed Applejack as she slapped the approaching hoof away.
“We’ll have a group hug after you tell us, Twilight, if that is what you want,” said Fluttershy.
Pinkie Pie clenched her teeth together as her whole body twitched.
Twilight looked straight up to the sky. “Oh, no! It’s already happening.”
Everyone looked up.
A black spot in the sky covered the zenith.
“What is that?” Spike held his claw on Twilight’s foreleg.
“I’ll go check it out!” Rainbow Dash flapped her wings and flew up.
“No!” Twilight pulled out of Spike’s hold and rolled onto her hooves. “Get down here now!” Her horn charged and illuminated the surroundings.
Enveloped in a magical field, the pegasus crashed on the ground.
“Rainbow Dash, are you okay?” Twilight stepped over her and looked up to the black spot in the sky. It was bigger than before.
“I’d be better off if you hadn’t slammed me down! What was that all about?” she hissed as she wiggled out from between Twilight’s legs.
“Don’t go up there again. It’s dangerous to you!”
“Twilight,” Applejack raised her voice. “What in courses is that black spot in the sky?”
Pinkie Pie crumbled to the ground. “The end,” she whispered. Her mane and tail were completely flattened, ears floppy.
“I’ll tell you. But I will want that group hug after!” Twilight smiled at Fluttershy, who seemed to be the only one who knew what the right priorities in this situation were.
Rarity sighed. “You’ll receive it; just get on with your explaining.”
Twilight approached the big rock imbedded in the ground. “This was my entry point.”
It dissipated as she touched the hard surface with her horn. A glowing blue sphere hovered in its place.
“What in tarnation is that?” Applejack asked.
“It’s a portal to my nether-realm. The place where my magic comes from.”
“I’ve heard about those inner dimensions before,” Rarity said. “Every living creature owns one. Most can’t access it directly, though. Twilight, do you think yours is encroaching on reality somehow? Is it another Tantabus?” She pointed to a black spot that was now spread across a quarter of the sky. The sun was near the edge of it.
“No.” Twilight shook her head.
Pinkie Pie bent her hind legs, laid her forelegs on them, and leaned her head on top.
Twilight looked up. “It is the reality that is corrosive to all the matter I’ve conjured in my empty subspace. Just as magic scatters in reality, so does formed substance dissipate here.
“That’s what’s happening to the edges of my conjuration right now. The abruption will continue to dispel projected matter as long as time-flow difference and a connection between my inner dimension and the real world exists.” She looked at the hovering bright portal in front of her.
“So, we’re not in reality, and we’re all going to die?” Rainbow Dash thumped both forelegs on the ground. “Is that what you’re saying?”
“We’re not even alive!” mumbled Pinkie Pie from within her forelegs.
“No!” Twilight pointed her leg at her. “You’re wrong! All of you are still alive, both here and there.”
“There?” Spike asked.
“Yes, in reality. You can see yourselves through the portal. Just don’t touch it.”
“What would happen if I did?”
“On contact, It would destabilise your cohesion. It’s very dangerous to you.”
Spike slowly approached the bright translucent orb and focused his eyes on it. He gasped and took a step back, pointing his claw at it. “There is a boulder above us in the world on the other side. It’s standing still, though. They—we all are.”
“The inner time is separate from the one in reality. Since this subspace is bound to me, I’m also connected to its time-flow. I can speed up the time in my inner-space as a whole or slow it down just by willing it. I can even disconnect myself from the fourth dimension and stop time completely. It’s the time-flow difference between subspace and reality that is causing the friction.
“After the conjuring, I initiated the inner-dimensional time to flow. That’s when the corrosion of formed matter started as it rubbed against the static time in reality.”
“Are you saying that you can stop the time whenever you choose to?” Fluttershy asked, raising her eyebrows.
Twilight closed her eyes, and the time in the subspace stopped. Even the soft breeze ceased ruffling her mane. The silence, she was all too familiar with, engulfed her inner world. She raised her eyelids and walked among her motionless friends, positioning herself right-angled to Fluttershy. Willing the time to flow again, she whispered in her ear, “Yes.”
Fluttershy cringed.
“I love you!” Twilight embraced her.
Fluttershy clenched her teeth and pressed her wings close to her body.
Applejack approached the glowing portal.
Rainbow Dash stomped a hoof at the ground. "No more hugs! Just tell us what's going on."
The hole in the sky ate at the sun. The land was darkening.
“How can we be here if we’re there?” Applejack asked.
“I wasn’t ready to face it all.”
“Twilight, what did you do?” Rarity half closed her eyes as she looked at her.
“I didn’t get a chance to tell you how much I love you.”
“Tell me you didn’t…” Rarity leaned her head to the side.
“I couldn’t even say my goodbyes.”
“Have you...” Rarity gasped as she moved her head back. “Did you conjure us up?” She pressed her eyebrows together “Is there nothing sacred to you, Twilight?”
“I didn’t conjure you. I copied you. Reaching into reality with my magic stream alone doesn’t affect its time-flow. I can spread my channels to the other side and touch the matter in real world, feeling its essence without affecting it. You see, no effect can be produced without time, and I can’t use the natural time-flow if I’m separated from the whole reality dimension.
“In this subspace, however, I have full control. I can recreate every structure, using conjured building blocks. Every single particle that you consist of is precisely placed in its exact mirroring position. I made sure of it. You’re all exactly the same as in reality, functionality-wise.”
“That’s appalling. Creating us just so you can watch us all get annihilated by the rift.” Rarity pointed to the starless black sky. The only remaining source of light emanated from the portal. “You had no right to do that to us.”
“I’m sorry. I spent so much time looking through that portal, calculating every contingency. The result is always the same. You die, no matter what I do. There just isn’t enough real-world time available. I cannot save any of you.” If only there was an extra moment for me to charge my horn. I could do so much. It’d be easy.
“But we are safe here, right? As long as we don’t touch the big black thing up above or this small shiny thingy.” Rainbow Dash flew just above the ground as she pointed to the floating orb. “What would happen if we did, though?”
“Despite consciously being yourself, your physical building blocks are still conjuration based. With no real matter to sustain your form, you would disintegrate on contact with reality. Only I, being from the material world, am immune to its effects.”
“Couldn’t you have stopped the boulder with your magic or teleported us all here when you were still in the real world?” Spike asked.
“There are exactly forty-two different spells I could have used to save you—if I only had the time to cast any of them. Look from below the sphere, Spike.”
He bowed down and looked through the hovering window to reality from the bottom. “There’s a rock on the other side, hovering just above this position.”
“The entry portal stands on the spot of my teleportation from the real world. I was lucky to get myself here in time. Self-transferring is the only spell I can do in an instant, and that was all the time I had.”
“Are you stuck here just as we are, sweetie?” Rarity approached her. “It’s your portal, so touching it wouldn’t end you, but the rock on the other side would.”
“No, that’s not a problem. From my subspace, I can form an exit point to a different location and avoid that rock. This is actually how my teleportation spell works. I don’t transcend space in reality, I traverse the coordinates through this inner dimension.“
“What’s the problem then?” Rarity asked.
“If I leave this place and step into reality, the time will continue to flow. I would witness the unavoidable future moment when all of you die. I’d be the one ordaining it!”
“Is that supposed to happen here or there?” Rainbow Dash pressed her forehooves against her head. “Ugh, this is so confusing!”
“Both, actually. Everything I create here is an anomaly. When I leave, the subspace assumes its natural state, which is nothingness. While in reality, there’s not enough time to save you from the boulder.”
“So, you’ve created another world without the boulder.” Spike leaned his chin on his claw. “You didn’t teleport in front of Applejack as I previously thought. You’ve only completed the first part of teleportation then formed a copy of reality, with us included, in your inner-space.” Spike looked at her with wide opened eyes. “That’s a lot of conjuring. How long have you been in this place, Twilight?”
“It must have been over a year for me since I entered my subspace. I had to get every particle right in its place or it wouldn’t be the same. It had to be precise, minus the boulder and the rest of the debris. I’ve worked tirelessly, surviving only on conjured nourishments.
“I want you all to know that I love you very much.” She raised her head and shifted her teary eyes among her friends. “I’m sorry I killed you all.”
The sky was black. Only the light emanating from the portal illuminated the surroundings.
“So, we’re all doomed?” Rainbow Dash tensed her body.
“I can only save myself.”
“But I’m too awesome to die!” exclaimed Rainbow Dash pointing her forelegs at Twilight.
She smiled at her. “I know, right?” She bowed her head. “I’m sorry.”
“Everyone!” Fluttershy raised her voice and blushed right after. “I think we owe Twilight a group hug now!”
Spike leaned both claws on Twilight’s leg. “It wasn’t your fault! You know that, right?” He looked up to her.
“You’re wrong. I’ve been over this a million times already. The only reason we took this route is because I insisted on it. It is my fault.”
“I would just like to make it clear that I don’t approve of any of this.” Rarity sighed as she wrapped a foreleg around Twilight’s neck. “You know very well that we would forgive you even if it was your fault. It’s what you did after that I find disturbing. You need to let go, dear. Don’t seal your heart within this void.”
“Can’t you do something, Twilight?” Rainbow Dash wrapped both forelegs around Twilight’s withers and brushed her mane against hers. “What if you stopped time, would that make the darkness stop?”
“Um, it would also make us stop,” whispered Fluttershy. “If there was any way to make it all better, don’t you think Twi would have tried it?” She embraced Rainbow Dash with one foreleg and Twilight with the other.
“Stop being sad!” Pinkie Pie stood up on her hind legs and leaned both forehooves on Twilight’s flank. “You’re the one who gets to live. You need to be happy for our sakes as well!”
“Twilight!” Spike clenched on tighter on her leg.
Applejack stepped to Rarity’s side, sliding a hoof on Twilight’s loin. “So, this is it then?” The hooves brushed among each other on Twilight’s coat.
“I love you all so much!” Twilight cried out.
There was no reply. There were no friends touching her anymore. She was alone with the portal in the stillness of eternity.
Wiping her teary face with a foreleg, she raised her head. Twilight, it’s time!
She floated in the vacuum some distance away from the entry point.
Her horn charged up. Spiraling fields of magic channels sprung the second portal from the nothingness in front of her.
She floated around it, looking through it into reality. The viewpoint was beyond the turn of the path. It was a safe spot. She couldn’t see her friends from this angle. Their fates were set in stone, but not Twilight’s. She could go on.
You can’t hide from reality forever! She lifted a hoof toward the portal, almost touching it. You can save yourself! There’s no reason not to.
Her body tensed. “Some Princess of Friendship I am…” Teeth clenched together.
She retracted her hoof, bowed her head and fired a blast from her horn.
Magic force shattered the exit portal. Pieces of it dissipated into the oblivion. “I am the Princess of Friendship!”
“But that is more than just a crown.” She turned and floated back toward the first portal. “It's a promise to bring ponies together.” Her horn shone ever brighter. “And never let anypony down.” Eyes glowed white.
Spouting channels connected, forming two magical streams. She extended them in opposite directions. One through the source of light and the other into the darkness.
Facing the portal, she focused on the tree in reality jutting from the slope beside her motionless friends.
As her stream of magic touched one of the branches in the shadow of the impending boulder, a leaf started to form in the void behind her.
“I’ll make it last longer this time around!”
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Comment section minigames for the second chapter of the story Princess of Friendship (anypony can play it in the comment section of this story)
GAME 1 - Comment section minigame for Chapter 2 (anypony can play it in the comment section of this story):
Does this story remind you of a song that you know? If yes, post it in the comments in the following format:
- A link or embedded youtube video of it.
- Percentage of correlation (0% being an unrelated song, 100% being a song written exactly for this story).
- Reason why this song reminded you of this story or the excerpt of the lyrics that is similar to a scene in the fic.
Music for reading:
Electric Light Orchestra - Twilight — Correlation:85% (Lyrics)
You disappeared without a trace — You brought me here, but can you take me back?
Beyond The Black - Lost In Forever
— Correlation:85% (Lyrics)
Lost in the vast of eternity — Nowhere to go, no one to be — Trapped in the silent infinity —Forever yearning, never free
Asrai - Lost — Correlation: 80% (Lyrics)
Death tempted her away - Gave meaning to her days
Lahannya - Cocoon — Correlation: 80% (Lyrics)
“No need to embrace — The truth you don't want to face — I've made my escape”
Metallica - Fade to Black — Correlation: 80% (Lyrics)
No one but me can save myself but it's too late — Now I can't think, think why I should even try
Lacuna Coil - Trip The Darkness — Correlation: 80% (Lyrics)
Seconds, minutes and hours spill over — There's no time here in space
Iris - Sorrow expert — Correlation: 80% (Lyrics)
I'm just a sorrow expert now — The more I love the more I drown — And the saddest part is I love what's ours — And that's when I give more
Amorphis - Sky Is Mine — Correlation: 80% (Lyrics)
From my world the sun faded—And the moon from my sky was gone with stars—I came home to a bleak room of sorrow—Forsaken house, place of grief, in solitude
4everfreebrony - Chant of Immortality — Correlation: 80% (Lyrics)
Num'rous regrets, the art of passing time — No one forgets, spent nights of chasing days — Eternal rest, to witness being erased
Epica - Blank Infinity — Correlation: 80% (Lyrics)
Do you cry to the heaven's high — When you're confined in here? — Do you not ever wonder why — These leaden tears will never dry? — They'll leave behind so many shadows — Living in me, living in all the memories in my life
Bella Morte - Stygian Shores — Correlation: 75%
(Instrumental)
Lacuna Coil - Not Enough — Correlation: 75% (Lyrics)
I don't want to be saved, — I want to go down with you
The Birthday Massacre - Down — Correlation: 75% (Lyrics)
I wish that I could fake it but I don't know how — I know we'll never make it but I can't stop now — We're only just beginning and it's over — Too late — No time, it's over and now — Can't wait
Evig Natt - In My Darkest Hour — Correlation: 75% (Lyrics)
Oh, I wonder what lies beyond this world — Eternal darkness, must be better than this — Living in hope, aching for your last touch
Lake of Tears - Come night I reign — Correlation: 70% (Lyrics)
Come night comes healing of my scars — Come night so comes my time to be
SAY Y - Refil — Correlation: 70% (Lyrics)
Dreams die in the past — I can't remove what I have done — There is no return to innocence
Satyrian - The Dark Gift — Correlation: 70% (Lyrics)
Darkness pressed the shimmering veil — To the black it starts to rend. — I am not called upon to be — The dark gift.
Within Temptation — It's the Fear — Correlation: 70% (Lyrics)
Save my beloved — There is no escaping — Because my fate is horror and doom
HolyHell - Resurrection — Correlation: 70% (Lyrics)
I ran too far — fought too hard and lived too fast. — It brought me down, tore me up — So I buried myself, — Deep down in the blackest hole
Within Temptation - Frozen — Correlation: 70% ([url= ]Lyrics)
Tell me I'm frozen but what can I do? — Can't tell the reasons I did it for you — When lies turn into truth I sacrificed for you
Everything will slip away — Shattered pieces will remain — When memories fade into emptiness
Ghost Dance - I will wait — Correlation: 70% (Lyrics)
Until the last of all my days — And the stars no longer shine — If you ask then I will wait — Till the very end of time
Evanescence - Taking Over Me — Correlation: 60% (Lyrics)
I believe in you — I'll give up everything just to find you — I have to be with you to live, to breathe — You're taking over me
Evanescence - Going Under lyrics — Correlation: 60% (lyrics)
I'm going under — Drowning in you — I'm falling forever (falling forever) — I've got to break through
The Birthday Massacre - Calling — Correlation: 60% (lyrics)
You’re all by yourself — There is no one else
Carnival Star - Black Rain Down — Correlation: 60% (Lyrics)
[Darkness descends, just like black rain.]
You Shriek - Daggers (press play on the page) — Correlation: 60%
[They all vanish into the shadow. Only Twilight can counter the darkness.]
Lahannya - Never Enough — Correlation: 60% (Lyrics)
“To regain what I have lost — I have to lose my way”
Lahannya - Out Of Time — Correlation: 60% (Lyrics)
“I'm running out of time — I’ve tempted fate for far too long — Across the last divide — I’m begging you for another dawn”
Beseech - Everytime I Die — Correlation: 60% (Lyrics)
another day in solitude — this isn't how I want my life to be
Zombie Girl - Creature of Night — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
“I am alone here in darkness”
Valved lies - Broken Alchemy — Corelation: 50% (Lyrics)
"These memories are incased in ashes"
Drowning Pool - Nothingness — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
“The emptiness is building from — The nothingness that we've all become”
James D. Stark - Run (click on play) — Correlation: 50%
“Run with me, escape reality”
Inkubus Sukkubus - We belong with the dead — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
Don't you try to change my mind - To sense and reason I am blind - We belong with the Dead
Type O Negative - Everyone I Love Is Dead — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
Someone drops dead - Whom I adore - You love someone - There will be grief
Grooving in Green - Even the Light — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
On one thing you can depend — Like the coming of night — All things surely must end — Even the light.
The Last Dance - Silently She — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
Falling between worlds — Through her painted sky — In her silence — Behind the shadow no one sees
Bullet for My Valentine - Tears Don't Fall — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
The moments die, I hear no screaming — The visions left inside me are slowly fading — Would she hear me if I called her name? — Would she hold me if she knew my shame?
London after Midnight - Sacrifice — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
Here we go again — We've taken it to the end, — With every waking moment — We face this silent torment. — I'd sacrifice, — Sacrifice myself to you
Darkness is all I want to see — I could never put in to words, — What it is you mean to me...
Liquid Sky - Echo — Correlation: 50%
When I'm all alone — I become lost in your endless echo
Liquid Grey - Part Of Everything — Correlation: 50%
Sometimes everything you know — is not there, anymore — You get this feeling down your spine — Like you've seen all this before.
Rhombus - What You Wanted — Correlation: 50%
Now you're haunted by what you wanted — Now you're hunted, rest alone
Wolfsheim - Once in a Lifetime — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
no rain can wash away my tears — no wind can soothe my pain — you made me doubt, you made me fear — but now I´m not the same
The Music - Come What May — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
I've been holding you in my mind — Scared, of facing you — And now I'm working my life away — Lonely for you
Suggested by: Cerulean Voice
Kataklysm - As The Wall Collapses — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
I will survive all the demons you throw at me — I will deny all the weakness inside — I will remember this day until the end of time — I will stand tall as the walls collapse on me
Suggested by: FamousLastWords
Slipknot - Wait and Bleed — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
I can't control my shakes, how the hell did I get here? — Something about this, so very wrong — I have to laugh out loud, I wish I didn't like this
Amorphis - Sky Is Mine — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
Something moving in the emptiness — Something drew me near — Someone told me of my future deeds — Whispered them in my ear
Tapping The Vein - Damage — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
You don't feel what I do — You don't live in this awful place — You don't know the darkness like I do
Trivium - Through Blood And Dirt And Bone — Correlation: 50% (Lyrics)
I'm alone when the ending comes — Take control of the nightmare — This fate has become my own — Choking on my soul — Misery has gained control
The Dreamside - Open Your Eyes — Correlation: 45% (Lyrics)
In the temple of her mind — She has driven it away — This dark and mortal day
Apoptygma Berzerk - Fade To Black — Correlation: 45% (Lyrics)
Life it seems will fade away — Drifting further every day — Getting lost within myself — Nothing matters, no one else
No one but me can save myself but it's too late — Now I can't think, think why I should even try
Edguy - Heart of Twilight — Correlation: 45% (Lyrics)
An old illusion of understanding — Is fading day by day — The apparition of a future vision is black — Everytime I dive in depressions — The colors of life are grey
— Correlation: 45% (Lyrics)
Washed away — Like your face drawn in the sand — At the edge of the sea is how we end — Painful is the memory — We did it to ourselves!
Leaves Eyes - Velvet Heart — Correlation: 45% (Lyrics)
The ashes of love buried in the past — A masquerade of the lonely torn apart souls — Like marble halls in winter's sphere — I'm breathing you, wanting me — Within these never ending walls — These souls will never disappear
Blind Guardian - Prophecy
— Correlation:40% (Lyrics)
Walls, I'll tear them down — And guilt will break the silence — But there is no return
Inkubus Sukkubus - Love Spell — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
Your life you have offered freely to me — And mine I give to thee
Within Temptation - Paradise — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
No we're not in paradise — This is who we are — This is what we've got
The Birthday Massacre - In The Dark — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
Why can't I just trade a dream for a way —To peel back the shade behind the gray
Sirenia - The Path to Decay — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
Seems like I'm falling deeper, deeper inside myself — Feels like I'm growing weaker, much weaker each day — Along the path to decay — The lights are fading day by day — No cure for the lost, there's no ascending
Amaranthe - Digital World — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
You will never have to cry — Cause the future is sold — You can never die — And you'll never grow old — But everything — Surrounding you is digital
You respawn and mistakes will repeal — But you will always be searching for an answer
E.L.O. - Twilight — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
You brought me here, but can you take me back? — Inside the image of your light — That now is day and once was night
Krypteria - Turn the World around — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
come and resurrect what might have been — Turn the world around — Come on, bring it down and break it, turn it inside out
The Love Crave - Can You Hear Me — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
No you can't tell you don't know how it feels — You don't know how it's breaking me
Road to Consciousness - The Middle Path — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
I took the middle path — From this moment And forever — I'm not the one I used to be — I fell asleep In eternal dream
In Strict Confidence - Seven Lives — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
Forever seek my dream — Days and nights and endless stream — Come with me — My march goes on
The Birthday Massacre - Pins and Needles — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
It's been so long — Feels like pins and needles in my heart — So long — I can feel it tearing me apart
The Birthday Massacre - Sideways — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
How can you criticize — When you're not here to compromise? — Words fade as time goes by — Without you, without you
∆AIMON - Flatliner — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
when our hearts were strong — we could know no wrong — even in our fall — we won’t be broken
Beseech - Sunset 28 — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
Ease her pain and her guilts — Tell her that no one really knows — Help her find new solutions
Black Sabbath - A National Acrobat — Correlation: 40% (Lyrics)
Don't believe the life you have — Will be the only one — You have to let your body sleep — To let your soul live on
GAME 2 - Help Twilight
There is a way for Twilight to permanently reunite with her friends. I’ve hinted to this option in the story. Can you figure out the solution for Twilight?
Extra Hint 1: Four solutions in this story are hinted. One's just silly, one impractical and one's been used. It's the permanent and practical one that happily ever after can create.
Extra Hint 2: Try thinking inside a chimney.
Extra Hint 3: There’s a reason why Twilight keeps the entry portal around.
Extra Hint 4: If you read the story like a programmer, you have a greater chance of finding the solution.
Winners (there can be more than one):
InversionZone
5649580
vasa555
GAME 3 - Cry
To win this game you have to shed at least one tear, as a result of reading this story, then admit it in the comments.
Winners of Game 3:
deli73
Dragor
Drowned Owl
5352309
GAME 4
Record yourself reading this story aloud. Upload your mp3 to MLP: Audiobooks, for instance, and paste the link to your audio or video in the comments.
Reward: Link to your audio reading in the long description.
Winners of Game 4:
Charzoid (Chapter 1, Chapter 2)
disturbing and confusing, lots and lots of confusing.
didn't really like it all that much.
i really dont understand the backround of the story
but otherwise good job
made no sense at all.
Oh! They all died in the ABBA-lanche and Twilight's brain broke. Rockin'.
Wish you went through this and fixed your tenses.
“Yes, I should have! Your advices had always been grounded. I should had listened to you more. I should had talked to you more. You know I love you, Spike, don’t you?”
Your advice has always been grounded. I should HAVE listened to you more. I should HAVE talked to you more.
It's hard to read with it's structure and grammatical errors.
I love the new title. Also, this is much better than the earlier gdoc version I read and commented on before.
A few errors still slipped in, though. I'll leave comments on the doc later.
Awesome story. Kudos, my friend.
4368770 4368774 4368814 4369007 As for tenses, I intentionally used Past Perfect Progressive tense as the things she is saying came before the event (which was more than a year ago). My editors never had a problem with this. But, as the reason for these tenses becomes evident only later in the story, I can see how this can be jarring to read.
I've upvoted your comments and will do so for any future criticism that I receive, because:
iambrony.steeph.tp-radio.de/mlp/gif/459205__safe_rarity_animated_sweetie%2Bbelle_image%2Bmacro_reaction%2Bimage_that%2Bis%2Bmy%2Bfetish_semi-dash-vulgar.gif
Thank you for your feedback.
4368894 No 'real' pony died yet. They are all still alive and frozen in time, until Twilight decides to return to reality.
4369036 You, my friend (and anypony else) can access my Google Doc here if you wish to grace me with detailed comments.
This story has been through around 4 title changes already, but I feel this one might stick as it describes the essence of the story most thoroughly.
Thank you again for all the edits and comments. I found them very valuable.
4369214
is there a reason that she couldn't pull them through the hole in reality she made?
4369295 It was the reality that was corrosive to the subspace. It's what erased them. Had they touched the darkness or the orb sooner they would get erased sooner. Twilight had warned them that it was dangerous for them to touch it. She herself was of reality and was therefore immune to the effects of it.
If Twilight can't find a way to save her friends, she'll make a way. And that works out about as well as one would think.
A sad piece, all the more so because it's somewhat believable. With no other options to preserve her friends, the princess of friendship retreats into her own navel (or her personal Calabi-Yau manifold) to spend as much time with them as she can.
Especially brilliant was Pinkie's line, "The rocks are trying to kill me again! The end is near!" At first, it seemed like a reference to her childhood. (We knew it was troubled; we just never understood the source of the trouble.) In time, it becomes clear that Twilight did too good a job of reconstructing her; she can perceive her own artificiality. And, perhaps, that this is not the first cycle of conjuration and decay Twilight has gone through here.
Thinking about it, that's yet another tragedy. Twilight may finally be able to understand Pinkie, but at what cost?
Thank you for a morbid but highly enjoyable story.
4369760 Some readers complained, that this story is hard to understand and I agree with them. It's not just the usual reality that this story refers to. It's a different concept that many haven't been introduced to before, so I can imagine how foreign this may seem to some. I tried to explain the physics of it all, but there are quite some pieces that the reader has to connect in order to understand the situation Twilight finds herself in.
I'm glad you had no problems with comprehension. I also like your headcanon about Pinkie Pie. The original reference I was going for was from Maud Pie episode (where rocks almost killed Pinkie Pie), but your interpretation works just as well.
I had to tag this story Teen for morbidity, even though no real pony dies (yet) in this story.
Confused.
I am very, very confused.
Maybe I shouldn't be reading this at night?
Well, I agree with everyone else.
It was kind of confusing. But also really sad. Rarity's scolding and Rainbow Dash's realization doubly so. There were also some punctuation errors, but you appear to have a guy for that.
4370164 4370175 This story is packed with hints and puzzle pieces. Everything is explained and evident, however, if you miss a sentence or two, you won't be able to understand it. It's an out of this world concept (literally) and not some slice of life that can be skimmed over.
Even though the concept isn't easy to understand, I would like to make the story clearer if there is still any room for that. It would help me tremendously if you told me what you are confused about.
I sadly don't have any dedicated editor, but anypony is welcome to point out any mistake in the public Google Doc of this story.
4370200
It's my night brain... I can't think correctly.
I'm sure I'll be able to understand in the morning.
Otherwise, great!
I hope Twilight can let go... eventually. Did they already or is it just that they will. Not sure why she couldn't just vaporize/atomize the rock or block it with a shield spell. Sometimes Twilight really stupid.
4370628
If you look at the spells she does in the show, you can see that most of them aren't instant casts. Self blink (teleportation), however, can be done in a blink of an eye. Had she attempted what you suggested, they would all die there and then. The way she solved their predicament saved everypony from certain death.
Nopony is getting hurt, as long as she doesn't step into reality. As soon as she does, the time will start flowing again (from her perspective).
In my personal headcanon, she does step into reality eventually, but not on the safe spot. She joins her friends in the end. She is the Princess of Friendship, after all.
I’ve also given a hint for yet another solution in the story. I wonder if anypony will be able to figure it out.
The entire series is just a figment of Twilight imagination
4371048 That's not exactly my headcanon, but I can see, how the story could be interpreted the way you described it.
4371051
Yeah it is a bit of a stretch, but I'm still trying to figure out why someone would put this in the evil twilight group
4371067 Necromancy = evil. What Twilight does is essentially raising the dead. If that isn't evil, then I'm not sure if anything is. That's just my line of thought, though. Do you want me to remove this story from said folder anyway?
4371071 Nah it's fine, but from the story you made it out as if twilight cloned them, not necromancy.
If anything it shows insanity
4371098 The point is, she made life out of non-life. And that life was bound to get destroyed and she knew that beforehand. She had killed her friends, then decided to kill them again, and again,...
I do understand your point of view, though. She didn't have many alternatives to what she did. Not sure if that makes it morally okay, but it does justify her actions to some extent.
The issue of the morality of her actions is one of the cornerstones of this fic, so it's kind of hard to define whether she was evil or good, because the fic tries to raise that question, not answer it (I intended for the reader to decide if it was moral or not).
I will support any decision you make regarding the folder this story was placed into. Your points are very valid.
4371114
I guess if you look at that way it could be somewhat evil in a selfish kind of way. Anyways I guess I'll classify this as one of those morally grey areas
It's not my group , so I won't do anything to it.
Now it's sleep time for this one
4370675
Heh. Well I probably would have been really cruel if it were me writing and decided that as an alicorn she can't die or at least that this didn't kill her. Of course, my writing's not great and how much of crumpled, broken alicorn can anyone put up with? Sure, she'd heal eventually, but laying crushed under a rock with the remains of your friends for company until someone comes out, either to check on them, or just to find out about the noise, etc can't be fun at all.
A double clone would be pretty interesting just stick your horn out the hole and resynthesize your friends further away using the bit inside the subspace as a model... Of course, we'd all be wondering if they could ever really be the ponies they were before, but still...
4375735 I really like the ideas you are having. You should totally be a writer.
The scene of immortal alicorn being stuck with her friends under the boulder is very powerful. My headcanon says that that's where she ends up, but you really put another dimension to it.
I do actually have a sequel for this story in my mind, but I decided not to write it just because it would be to cruel and ironic. It's about her healing herself mentally, but not in a good way.
I've gotten some responses, that this story, is more tragic than they can put up with, so writing more of it would also get me more hate.
I imagine she'd be stucked under that boulder for quite some time. The path they are on is dusty and overgrown, pointing to it pretty much being abandoned.
That idea of double cloning is interesting, but in my opinion it isn't possible because:
- You can't build a copy while the time is running, and she can't stop the real world time.
- this:
The default state of subspace is it being empty. When Twilight messes with it it's an anomaly. When she exits it, the subspace assumes its default state.
SPOILER WARNING. I think
So basically, The main six are about to get killed by a rockslide. Twilight only has the ability to save herself, but rather than do that she instead locks the others in a subspace time loop so she can power hug them over and over for the rest of eternity..
Did I get that right?
------——----—--
Almost no setup, and just a solid block of Twilight freaking out will no resolution other than a 'return to story start' line. Sorry but I have to down vote this.
4378951 I value all constructive feedback (I upvoted your comment to show my appreciation for criticism) and I commend you on your honesty, sir. Of all the downvotes I received, yours was my favorite. Thank you. I’ll try to learn from it.
I'll ponder on what you said and will try to find a solution to the (lack of) setup problem.
4379013
It's a personal rule of mine to always try to explain why I dislike something.. I guess anonymous down thumbs just seem rude.
------
On the setup issue perhaps a paragraph showing Twilight setting up the subspace. The way it currently reads, the lack of information leads me to be more irritated a twilights refusal to explain than empathetic.
4379071 I tried to give readers a rollercoaster ride by giving them bits of information to the puzzle that they can then piece together. I wanted readers to have that epiphany moment, by giving the setup at the end of the story.
By doing this at the end instead of the beginning, I only managed to confuse readers.
With Twilight, withholding the information, I tried to show, that she is still in denial even after so much time. She's still incapable of coming to terms with it all.
With this, I only managed to frustrate readers.
I think I see it now. I was being to ambitious. I wanted to make something new and epic. In the process I broke the main pillars of storytelling. You gave me a lot to ponder on. Thank you.
This is quite a good story! Granted it has flaws but I really enjoyed it. Its a really creative idea so well done!
4379186 I really enjoyed this, contrary to what others have said i think the way you wrote this is amazing. I loved the mystery side where the reader has to actually think and can come up with different ideas as more information is presented. I think if you showed her creating the subspace in the opening paragraph it would have ruined it. What is the point in a mystery story if the biggest most crucial facts are just handed to you in the beginning? It just makes it boring. As if we knew what happened from the beginning it ruins the plot of "why is Twilight acting weird and clingy".
4383762 Your comment just made my day. What you said was exactly what I was going for. I wanted to hook the reader at the start and present the information about the inner workings when reader would crave for it.
I didn't want to start the story with: Here's how subspace works. Here's how the timeflow varies. Nopony would care.
However, I do still agree with 4378951. Perhaps, if there was more plot to this story, the concept of it would be easier to grasp. Initially I thought that it would take away readers focus from the concept that this fic is meant to be about, but now I think I was wrong. A concrete story could perhaps give a reader the platform on which he/she could apprehend the overreaching concept making it shine even brighter.
Also, stories usually start with a solid setup. That method was proven to work time and again. Despite my initial cutting out of the things that I deemed as ‘not needed’, I'm considering adding chapter 1 to this story, making the current state of it chapter 2. The reader would then be able to experience past events instead of them just being referred to. I could also make it obvious that self-teleportation was the only way to go.
Of course, I'll have to think about this some more, before I decide to rewrite this fic. There are pros and cons on both sides.
I liked this. It's a bit rough around the edges, but altogether good.
mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw6278-3883-fuck-this-shit.jpg
Loved it!
Three words: I loved it. There's nothing else needed to be said that hasn't been already. I've been waiting for another great story of yours, and this is it! Keep up the good work!
4369760 4382627, 4402335, 4390471
The negative comments (positive in my eyes) that I've received thus far can be summarized in 4 lines:
4368770, 4368814, 4369295, 4370164, 4370175, 4370628, 4371048
* Confusing — Fixed. At first I tried to make the story into a mystery, so that the readers would slowly uncover what's going on and then at the end have an epiphany moment. I changed the story so that It's no longer a mystery fic (I’m sorry, 4383762). All the confusing parts are now clearly expressed instead. The reader gets the relevant information early on and not just at the end, as was the case before.
4368894
* What's with Twilight? — Fixed. More thoughts and reactions from Twilight on all relevant points. The reader now knows what Twilight is going through.
4368774 4378951
* No setup — Fixed with addition of a new chapter, setting up the story. With Chapter 1 now in place, this fic is now concluded.
4369007, 4369036, 4384599
, and I’ve also had multiple editors have a look at it.
* Other minor errors — Fixed. I must have self-edited this story more than 50 times
I thank you all for your feedback. Without it I could not have raised the quality of this story to the current level. An outside perspective can really help out an author. What you see now before you is essentially a rewrite.
Honestly? I feel the story is weaker now. There's no mystery, no impetus to piece together what happened, no creeping realization of unreality. In short, no reason to keep reading after the first chapter. All there is is a pony collapsing in on herself in a fit of guilt and madness. I'm not claiming that true art has to be incomprehensible, but the original definitely felt like a better story. Most of the complaints you listed completely miss the point of what you were going for.
4506287 You're right. I did sacrifice the mystery part of it. There was no way around it. Readers were getting confused by the mystery, despite the full reveal at the end.
I really wanted readers to fully understand the situation that Twilight finds herself in. Cutting out the mystery was the only way to make way for clarity. I'm sorry, I didn't know what else to do.
Edit: I've saved the one-shot version that you liked better. Anypony can access it here: Princess of Friendship as it was on 13th May 2014 (Google Doc).
I just read the new prologue, and I sorta agree with 4506287.
I haven't read the new chapter 2 yet, so my context here might be wrong now, but personally I think chapter 1 could've ended here:
EDIT: I stopped reading chapter 2 after 5 paragraphs. Sorry, friend, but now I'm just sad because I felt the parts that I loved about the original oneshot is gone now. Oh well, can't please everypony...
4506211
You've fixed the major issue I had with this story. Down thumb retracted.
4506211 thanks for the extra chap makes the story much better to understand
4506287 4369036
There's still some mystery in this fic for those that seek it. So far, nopony has figured out a solution to the Game 2 yet.
4506841 4506852
I wrote Chapter 1 with you guys in mind. I'm glad you found it to your satisfaction.
4506907 i'm guessing the answer to game 2 is for twilight to give up her immortality and princess hood and then die
4506827 the original one shot was chapter two. Chap 1 was added because mystery was overpowering understanding and infuriating most of the readers. There are still flaws, but it's not a train wreck like it was before.
4507032 Good try, have an upvote; but no, that is not the correct answer.
If she does this right, she can be reunited with her friends and they can live happily ever after. Your answer does not meet that scenario and is therefore false. You can try again.
4507052 back to the drawing board
4507072 That is what most readers assume, yes. However, repeating what she's been through in Chapter 2 does not meet the 'live happily ever after' criteria. You can guess again if you want.
Nice!