i would like to see a story with this theme

WAIT A MINUTE!! WHY ARNT YOU WORKING ON SENT 2 (dont get me wrong i liked this) IV BEEN WAITING TO SEE AN UPDATE IN THAT STORY

I like to have more plz!

If it's a one shot how come you have it marked as incomplete?

4490310 Because i'm an idiot!

4490310
4490340

Its because he secretly wishes for this to be a full blown story

Oh I can't wait for the next chapter, this mean that he is officially the new prince right? I don't know it works on Equestria but in royalty, if you date a princess and then impregnated her, you can ask to had the crown, and its only logical, since they are dating.

Also I wonder what could appear, human, pony, alicorn, or centaurous, the possibilities are endless!

This needs a serious syntax fix to really work, the writing is so disjointed that I didn't even get to the clop part. For the most part it's decent, but some parts are just godawful.

4490748
This deserve to had a continuation or at the very least a sequel, I really wish what happen next, also do you think Luna would wear that kind of attire as well?

4490918 I believe that this Luna would wear something similar but of a more enticing variety.

4491148
enticing?

there is no good reason to not make a sequel to this

4491525
enticing.
To attract by arousing hope or desire

i wonder what she would wear..

This is, pretty good. Not bad, not bad at all. I shall give a mustache!

4491718
Well she clearly is the type that enjoys spankings and be dominated so...I will imagine either catholic student, maid outfit or a collar, I aim more toward the maid outfit

awww that was cute

Damn, so much Princess shipping, so little time. Was hot.

"Sister, it is next to impossible for a stallion to impregnate us, what made you think our friend here could?"

Why does this sound like he can?

>continues reading

Lol

well that was rather entertaining this should totally be continued.

CONTINUE THIS!!!!!!!!!

so please lower standards

are you fucking kidding
the fact that you are not good at english because you are foreign does not make your fic better than other people's who simply have bad english due to negligence
why should you receive special treatment

4492464 Because English is not my first language? Because you have to take into account that I have learnt a language that is not my first and let me ask you would you want people to be more forgiving if you were learning Hebrew, French, German or Japanese?

Because at the end of the day you make allowances for people who are struggling but want to get better. When I said lower standards I meant do not expect great punctuation and or sentence structure so stop being so aggressive! I make it clear that I don't want sympathy or likes because English is not my first language I want the hard core critics to take into account that I am not being lazy with my work I am generally just struggling. How about this learn a language any language then try and write fanficition for that and see how you respond when people of that language say that your poor grammar is no excuse and have a go at you for asking them to not have high standards. I personally think my English is okay but wished for people to know that I am still inexperienced with several of the methods used in the English language.

4492464 In fact here in the author box

" If this is not to your tastes, give it a try anyway if you don't like it you can thumb it down or leave feed back. "

So I asked people even who might thumb this down if they read it to read it anyway and to thumb it down if it is not to their liking! So in what way am I trying to get Sympathy or special treatment?

4492548 >assumptions
english is not my first language either and i have written some fanfiction, now what?
simply do not ask us to "lower our standards". do you see other people do it? i do not. write more instead
that is all

4492464 Dude. Chill. The dude just doesn't want people to be disappointed. Let him care for his readers.

449258 Then you realise how hard it is leaning English! This was never about sympathy but I am allowed to make it apparent that the writing skills are not done to laziness that is all I want to stress. If you thought I was trying to then I am sorry (Tha mi duilich)

Once again, you have caused me to vomit due to your terrible linguistic skills and hardly-palpable... whatever this is.

Keep up the good work.

4492633 You always know how to cheer me up!

B-but your Scottish... HOW?!?

4492635

I know.

4492637 Gaelic! I know everyone assumes that English is the only language I was brought up in the highlands, as savage as that sounds and was taught Gaelic like many others were taught. It is a dying language maybe a bit strong but is not pracitsed as much as English is seen as, better and more clear. (If that makes any sense) but I never thought I would be moving to Dundee. Same with the Irish, Parts still speak Gaelic as well. I am maybe streching the truth slightly. It was more of a duel learning. I learnt both English and Gaelic though I learnt English later on about when I turned 13 due to having autism I found it very hard to multitask which is not good for learning two languages. The problem is though that I have always found English to be far harder and even now I still forget words. Living in Dundee has greatly improved my verbal but due to my writing skills lacking in both languages it makes it all the harder. So maybe in a way it is an excuse using it but I am at the moment getting lessons so hopefully I will be able to redo all my stories

4492671
That sucks man. Hopefully if you work hard you can get up to scratch with people who were taught it from birth.

4492691 Hey man here is hoping. I admit that in some cases I think my work could have been better if I had spent more time on it but all in all I hope to improve my work for future readers. Not that the stories will be any better.

4492590 It is fine I understand where s/he is coming from, Gaelic along with Polish hebrew hindi and so on are some of the hardest languages to learn in the world whilst English is repeatedly stated to be the easiest I belief her ire is that if I have learnt Gaelic then English should be easy.

Though my friend who is a "filthy" Jew is teaching me Hebrew. I can say fuck off and son of whore as well as bless you in hebrew so far I am so happy

4492580 Everyone is different. You may be some body builder while Flare is an average guy, or vice versa. No one knows. So snack on some ice, run a cold bath, and chill, k?

Black Commentary!

Though she had tearfully apologized later, she had still shattered my rib cage and nearly killed me.

Dayum, that's one way to start a friendship, attempted murder is always a good icebreaker...

In more ways then one.

Uhm... I was just— Oh fuck this is actually happening.

The hell you expect, son? A tea party?

Uh, we don't have to do this if you dont want to.

Well obviously she does, boi. I wouldn't put on a latex suit and let one a them ride me if I wasn't slightly interested...

Not that I am...at all...

My sister has been infatuated with you for quite a while Anon

img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120930201320/fairytail/images/3/30/You_don't_say.png

Cus' sniffing at his dong is a greeting of two strangers...

In fact, you are the first being to interest her in nearly two thousand years

Dayum! She musta got some cobwebs up in that business. She's almost as barren as Hilary Clinton!...

...

Oh, you guys are no fun.

“PREGNANT!” I cried out, wildly pointing back and forth between the alicorns, Luna scowling at me whilst Celestia held a bright smile.

U dun goofed ma boi.

And Tirek was born!

Your English is pretty good, for it being a second language. I was paying more attention to the story, so the only problem that really caught my eye were some grammatical errors (misplaced or unnecessary commas, etc).
I did enjoy the fic, though. I'll be thumbing up and favoriting.

4493213 Thanks now if you could do that for all my work. and swear undying loyalty to me that would just be grand

4492940 the ugliest ass child that was ever spawned

4493227 you mean discord?

i remember seeing one similar by no-ink, or sunibee, funny stuff.

Nice.

4492464
Bump. You have my sword, and axe, and other assorted tools.
lizapalmer.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/10/aragorn.jpg

4493586

4490748 I am mulling it over I wanted to make it a one shot because it would be nice to have an actual finished story. Honestly I am not going to write more chapters just to milk reviews I would only really do it if the fans were willing to be strict with my writing and point out any mistakes.

I am a mediocre writer who enjoys fimficition because the I like the bronies here and I like to feel like I give others joy. If you guys want me to continue this then I am more than happy to!

May I just say, no matter how "gifted" that guy is, NO LIVING MAN NATURALLY GROWS A DICK THAT'S BIGGER THAN A PONY'S! That just doesn't happen, man! It ain't natural, so you better have a damn good reason why this guy is so "gifted", and better involve pills if it's going to make any sense!

Other than that, good story. Can't help but notice you got a thing for feminine creatures larger and stronger than average human men getting funky with said men.

4494007 female mares can control every muscle in their vagina meaning that they could get off to even a guy with a two inch dick. Also we can just assume if needed that Luna or what ever made him bigger with the biggest fuck your logic factor, "Magic"

4494007 Taller women and mares are awesome.