- Member Since 6th Mar, 2014
- offline last seen Aug 19th, 2016
Petitprincess
I moved here from Fanfiction just to see how well my stories will do here. Of course, I'm not looking for popularity, I would just love some feedback, just to see if I'm going in the right direction.
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Looks interesting... I'm going to track it to see where it goes.
Yay! More Shining/Sombra!
I'm anxious to see how this turns out. Have my upvote and favorite.
mmm,
lets see where this goes, out of curiosuty
it's a tad corny but aw well, it's not exaclty the most believeable couple in the first place so we can slide that past
Not enough of shining/sombra
Please do go on.
I need more
more! shinning need to be filled by sombra
replycandy.com/wp-content/uploads/Al-Bundy-Well-Here-We-Go-Again.jpg
There should be more Sombrashine, love this fic so far :D
goodness!!!!
5712987 Is that a bad goodness or a good goodness?
5712996
it was awesome i love it so far can't what for Sombra to deflower Shining
Well, yeah... little short, which is sad because it's quite good, but it ends before I get in the mood
i love your art!!!
5793838 So my art is, apparently, making porn fan fiction...I am so proud of myself, you just can't possibly understand *total sarcasm*
i.imgur.com/m8hRBN4.jpg
5793922 "I just don't know what went wrong!"
That was pretty good... and surprisingly cuddly
Moarrrrrrrr
Awww so CUTE!
Also at the end i think you meant "why don't we go to sleep" not "why do we go to sleep"
I love it and want more faster
love it update soon k.
Well lets see here.
You got the fluff direction down. they said words in the loving tones.
I will say try to still make the plot somewhat relevant to your fluff. Fluff is made to add onto some sort of activity or tender moment between normal everyday moments. So it's those scenes were you just dropped by to say Hi to someone when they weren't expecting it. Ya know, stuff that makes stuff sweet. Your not using it incorrectly per say, it was more just "oh hey we woke up after sleeping for some time, lets just tell each other we sorta love each other and then fall asleep again and ignore everything that's happened cause everything's gonna work out"
Only thing would really suggest is just to try and string the events that happen a little more nicely. Alot of stuff kinda 'just happens' for no reason outside of coincidental suggestive moments.
Other than that, keep up the good work and keep getting better. =)
5840481 Yeah, like I said this was first time writing fluff
, so I wasn't really sure what all I should put into it. Also, I was going to address all the events that happened prior, but not everything happened the way I expected it to (I'm still happy with the way it ended up though). I actually wanted this to have a bit of smut in it, but I felt that it was best to give the reader a break (or at least TheVClaw 
). Other than that, I'm glad that I got your criticism on my story and I'll make sure to keep it in mind. Thank you so much for reviewing
5841042
Good luck in the future.
5841042 need update badly must find out.... *twitches from romantic scene* need more.... Must have more.... Please... Need fluff..... *passes out from awesome Sombra X Shining fix*
5837933 That's what he said.
6185368 I know
Tracking... :P
Excuse me while i look at some fluff
6595146 The next chapter is fluff, plus if you didn't like it, it is rated M for a reason. Sorry that this didn't appeal to you
a pony in the crowd somewhere >you're a douche!
lol oh lawl , now if only we could reverse the sexes for the situation and not have it be a cultural problem too :l .....
of course you're not in love shining you fool you're just horny lol...
lol wait why was sombra suddenly made to stutter awkwardly sometimes too?....