“I understand you had a part in stopping this so called 'Changeling Invasion?” Karal Ironbeak, the Griffon Ambassador to Equestria said as he peered at me over his beak.
He was a older Griffon with brown feathers that grayed towards the edges of his wings. He was of the Eagle/Lion combo. Apparently Griffons have more subspecies than ponies. Tons of them actually. Okay, it seemed to be less subspecies and more physical characteristics, about the equivalent of hair color, but still.
Griffons are fairly mysterious to Ponies. The Griffon Empire is small and located to the east across a narrow sea. Despite the proximity, they don't actually have a lot of contact with Equestria. Something about sea serpents. Most of the trade went the long way around up to the north, almost to the pole, moving around the sea via rail.
I was initially nervous being in a room with what counted as large predators, but I got over it quickly as they were quite friendly.
I shifted slightly and tilted my head, “Only the smallest part. I simply provided a small distraction, Ambassador.” I replied with a nod at Celestia, “Princess Celestia is the one that won the battle.”
“Ah, but your distraction was instrumental, was it not?”
The dinner was a rather informal affair. Luna, me, Princess Celestia, the Ambassador, his wife and their daughter. It wasn't even held in the large dining hall in the Embassy.
“I am certain Princess Celestia would have prevailed without my interference.” I answered, “But perhaps I made it a bit easier.”
Luna eyed me and looked like she was about to say something when she was interrupted by the Ambassador.
“Ah! Finally!” he said as a pair of Griffons entered the dining hall, carrying trays, “Our guests are starving!”
We had already finished the Appetizers and had been waiting for the main course. I admit I was somewhat curious about what we might be served.
The plate was put before me and the silver dome that covered it was removed at the same time as everyone else to reveal...
A pair of fish fillet's that looked like they had been fried over open fire. They were laying on a bed of fried greens and rice, some kind of red sauce had been drizzled over it.
My eyes widened in surprise and I couldn't suppress a happy smile. It smelled heavenly! Two years! Two years since I last had any kind of meat!
It was even something I could eat! Yes, yes, yes! I happily picked my fork up and tried a piece of the fish. At least that was something Luna taught me about Griffons. They didn't have anything silly about table manners like waiting until the highest rank started eating. Something about showing that you trusted the host not to poison you.
Heaven.
Heaven on a fork. Absolutely fucking fantastic. Where do they get their fish and can the castle chefs be bribed to make some? If not, I'm defecting! Wait, I'm not military. I'm moving to the Griffon Empire. Surely Luna can be convinced to move? They have a moon there too, right?
“What is this!?” Ambassador Ironbeak thundered, “Get the chef up here! Our guests were meant to be served Equestrian meals!”
I blinked and looked up to see Celestia and Luna looking at their plates. Celestia looked as composed as ever, but I knew Luna better and could see that she was somewhat disturbed by the fish.
Oh yeah...
That's why there were so hard finding fish to buy. Ponies in general were strictly vegetarian even if we could eat small amounts of meat with no problem. I wouldn't be able to have something like this every meal, but once a week would be okay.
Using my fork, I had another small piece of the delicious, delicious murder. Luna might ban kisses for a while, but this would be so, so, worth it.
And she better not ever find out I thought that.
“Oh. I'm sure it's not that big of a problem, Father.” his daughter said as she looked at me across the table. I am awful at judging ages accurately in ponies, yet alone griffons, but she seemed to be in her late teens, “Lord Page seems to enjoy it.”
That caused everyone to look at me.
...Oh great.
They all seemed surprised, even Luna, before she rolled her eyes slightly.
I finished chewing before I smiled, “I for one, enjoy fish, whenever I am able to find it. It is a rare thing for me. It's been years since I last had some. It is not the easiest commodity to find in a city such as Canterlot. The meal is expertly made, my compliments to the chef.”
I had honestly thought about going fishing myself to get my hooves on some fish before.
Luna looked somewhat... uncomfortable about the idea, but the Ambassador spread his head feathers, looking quite pleased.
“I am sure he will be pleased to hear that, Lord Page.” He said with a nod, “Even so, it is rare for a pony to enjoy some of the finer things in life. Such a mistake like this should not have happened.”
Couldn't really argue with that.
There was some commotion as Luna and Princess Celestia's meals were taken away and replaced with much more Equestrian meals. Well, basically the same but with the fish replaced with filled bell peppers.
Honestly, that looked pretty tasty as well. When the servants returned my meal was replaced as well with fresh hot plate of the same kind of fish I had just been eating.
Bloody glorious! I love griffons!
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I relaxed against the pillow of the couch in the carriage, bringing us back towards the castle, Luna was on the couch across from mine. Celestia had her own ride.
She raised a eyebrow at me and I tilted my head.
“What?”
“Did you have to eat the fish?”
I smiled and happily nodded, “Yes. It was delicious.”
She sighed and stuck her tongue out at the idea before she shrugged, “In any case, you nicely disarmed his ploy.”
“Huh?”
“It is a trick almost as old as I am. Serve a dish from your culture that your opponents would find repulsive and then 'protect them' from it by sending it back, having a more suitable one served in it's place. A tiny bit of psychological warfare, however it works better with a larger audience.” Luna explained, “Likely it was a show for his daughter more than anything else, he should know by now that such things do not work on my sister and me.”
She then grinned, “And I think you might have gotten an admirer from it too.” she teased playfully.
...Huh. I just wanted some fish.
How cruel.
Too bad this chapter was so short I'd would have liked some more interactions with the griffins but it was a awesome chapter anway
6781353 In the life of a man truly in love (or whipped) that is one of the cruelest punishments there are.
6781369 Amen brother
It's funny, fish is one of the things my parents don't share a love of. My dad actually waits till a day/night that she works before frying up some fish, otherwise she spends several hours complaining about the smell.
Wonder if that was Gilda or not...
Nice work, keep it up.
... I hope it was salmon. I love salmon!
Loved this particular chapter. Page needs more fish and griffons in his life.
This reminds me of my own story, what with a brown furred unicorn with a writing-related cutie mark who was once a human and seems on good terms with Luna. Is yours also a self-admitted self-insert?
Give the poor ex-human more fish!
Give the poor human the magic to turn back human but to retain his magic, it will be AWESOME and I can be he will be more than happy if Luna give him that as a present, a very complex and difficult spell that only she could had perform but in the end could bring him back to his original form.
I know, I know you might want to keep him like that, and maybe had being stories with this same plot but I just keep thinking, if he return to human, but keep his magic, he can be more versatile at magic combat, you know he is human throw and throw, adapting magic power to human combat will be like pour water on the ground as oppose to oil on the ground like it is kind of happening now. Just…think about it.
Also 2 things clever, I see what you mean there, black page doesn't mean 'author' black page its another representation of his human nature right? humans can be whatever they like and so can he, when you put that mark it means that he can be whatever he wants, because that is what a blank page stand for, something that hasn't b writer yet, something that it can be whatever he wants, he is not inferior to Twilight he can in fact be superior and the reason his magic is so low is because he is mentally blocking himself right? Je clever guy.
And yes, I think Celestia feeling not be corresponded could make for an interest story, don't get me wrong Celestia and Twilight shipping can be good if place correctly but there are so MANY of them than finding one where Twilight actually say 'no' is close to cero, so what do you say dude? would you dare to make something new?
Ah! Glorious fish!
This was funny. It's nice that Page was able to have meat of some kind for once.
Heh, this made me grin. Well done Page.
*Page takes a pose like my avatar* "Uh...want some?"
Interesting that you have Luna being Out Of (Fandom) Character by not having her like meat, which was entertaining.
However, from this paragraph, she's OOC even for your own story. The "trick" certainly DID seem to work here on both Celestia & Luna since their meals were returned. If the alicorns had both dug in as Page did--even if they showed their distaste--THEN Luna's comments here would've make sense.
ABSOLUTELY LOVED IT CAN'T WAIT FOR MORE
To which Page grabs the plate to himself in his arms, back arched, hackles raised and letting out a warning *HISS* like a cat.
He should really blow their minds by trying a nice juicy steak. Even if it won't do his new pony body much good (no worse than junk food) the taste will still be glorious for that omnivorous human mind that refuses to be ponified into some vegetarian prey. Hah!
Kinda reminds me of another human-turned-pony story where the mare (formerly male human) would eat meat with the gryphons. Gave her "gastric distress" (like Taco Bell) something fierce but the annoyance was worth it. Also fed a nasty rumor she was a demon in pony-form, something about a old tale about a meat eating boogie-mare that would come out of the closet and eat your face at night...
6786470 where can I find this? Sounds hilarious
6789868
I agree, what is this story?
6786470 tell me this story
6786470 tag-post so I can find out as well.
6782491 Or maybe she saw Page chowing down, decided that as long as Page is eating it the ploy has been foiled, and rolled with the bell peppers because she didn't want the gastric nightmare the next day.
6900451 One does not give the Princesses gas. Luna is one thing, but Celestia rules the sun.
Solar flares are a distinct possibility.
Why do writers assume ponies are going to be upset at the sight of meat?
Horses, on rare occasions have been observed eating meat.
Just one of those moronic tropes that drive me up the wall because of "they eat grass and veggies and simply must be driven sick at the site of cooked meat!".
Once...just once I would like to see an author who writes ponies who don't go pale when there's meat on the table.
unwritten rule of working around horses. "Never, Ever leave your hamburger on the fence rail." The odds are that you will never see it again.
Um. Horses will eat their own placenta. Flesh and meat aren't strictly excluded from their diet.
7019665 no duh I've seen a horse eat a bird. Just walked up to it and ate it.
6909169
I've run across quite a few fics where it's merely a cultural thing and some group (typically pegasi but sometimes just plain anyone in costal towns) has fish as a normal part of their diet.
6786470 yes can you please please please please give me the link to that story.
6786470 Same here.
6786470 comment the name of the story it sounds brilliant..
6909169
Here you go.
6786470 WHY DOES EVERYONE SAY THAT TACO BELL GIVES YOU INDIGESTION OR SOMETHING?!?
Seriously, the worst experiences from Taco Bell I have is when some lettuce gets into the no-lettuce tacos I order.
Also, please link us the story!
6781353 burp in her general direction
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6789868
I think it is The Alchemist's Heart by Seven Fates. The meat chapter is Chapter 5.
here's another story where a pony eats meat:
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/246414/a-different-perspective
6909169
Well Page just ate meat, so... there you go, I guess?
bet he was singing this as he was walking out the door.
Uh... How long did it take him to eat the first plate of fish and rice, before they served him seconds? Did they remove the first meal of fish, or leave it on the table along with the second? I mean, I can't really see him eating an entire plate in just a couple of minutes during that conversation.... Also, what about the appetizers? Wouldn't Karal Ironbeak have tried the ploy at the beginning, like with Bacon wrapped shrimp kebabs or something? Oh, great, now I'm hungry... Still good chapter, though....
6909169
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Keep in mind, horses are herbivores. That means that their teeth and digestive systems are specialized towards such. In fact, their systems have gut flora that is specifically there to break down cellulose. They're not ruminants (such as cows and goats) or pseudo-ruminants (like camels), and as such have only a single chambered stomach, but their small intestines are proportionally longer than an omnivore's. Yes, horses can, and sometimes do, eat meat, but that doesn't mean that they should.
https://www.thesprucepets.com/things-a-horse-shouldnt-eat-1886470
Ponies in MLP:FiM are vegetarians in the show to avoid the trope of carnivore confusion. Given that they do consume milk and that eggs are in their recipes, they aren't purely herbivores.
7127772
So have I, with Pegasi being more likely to do so due to the energy requirements they have for flying. Unicorns might also do so, especially if intensive magical casting has been done so they can make up the energy. Ironically, Fluttershy would probably be the one least squicked out by the thought of hunting or consuming meat due to the fact that she takes care of animals, some of which are carnivores and omnivores.
6781903
I'm more of the opinion that Luna and Page are intentionally going in that direction specifically to troll Celestia when they do mention it, rather than any intent on her having amorous designs on Twilight.
9075666
And not only are horses in our world and their world herbivores, but the ‘meat,’ as you say, that would be on the plate? More often than not may make them think of sapient creatures. Since we humans on earth are the only ones who are sapient, we dont have this problem. As much. Have you ever eaten meat in front of a vegetarian when they’ve not been around meat in a while? Some of them glow positively green. It’s mostly a factor of their culture, not what they can eat. You dont eat people, right? Well some did and do. It’s just the culture.
I very much enjoy the savory taste of umami within the flesh of nonsentient, lesser animals.
(Can horses even taste that? I heard that being unable to taste umami is part of the reason why pandas eat bamboo despite their own gut microflora being suited for omnivores)
Eh, every vegetarian i have ever met is fine with being around meat. Nice people those vegetarians. They really know how to get the most out of grilled vegetables. Its makes my meal so much better. One chick i knew could make tofu hotdogs that were just amazing.
Now vegans, those are the ones you have to watch out for. Maybe its just my luck but every vegan ive ever met was an asshole.
9487231
It's most of them, honestly. My brother is a vegan, and for over three years, he made sure to tell me, every time there was meat in the house, how horrible a person I was.
Heh
9716921
I don't mean to offend, but your brother is an dick, and if I were you I get an big juicy steak and eat it in front of him
Fish! images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/ddc4a67f-dbff-4672-9bed-c7c3c220b5c5/dcynvz1-c1181179-4b50-4933-96db-07444c2469a7.jpg/v1/fill/w_747,h_1070,q_70,strp/a_face_only_a_mother_could_love__by_kittyrinnaiko_dcynvz1-pre.jpg?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.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.cfIWXzxJHSd7Rc2lgAdZnLXM7WH9NXEt7-7LDTizDvY
I could go for some fish right now.
6781710
👋. Ohai!
9819213
That is some uncanny valley right there.