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For the past year, or so, Rainbow Dash has not been living comfortably in her own home. Her father walked out on her, and her mother has become a heavy drinker. All of that alcohol intake has caused Rainbow Dash's mother to be physically and verbally violent towards her daughter. The athletic Canterlot Highschool student has yet to tell a soul on what is going on at home. This is her struggle.
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10/7/16
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Before I read this story, tell me now somebody - the BIG secret isn't a penis, is it?
Because if it is I'm not going further.
EDIT - (looks at description)
Oh right...I apologize and shall now follow the author.
This is good a few typos but that's expected, the thing I don't understand is why is there a tragedy tag?
I found this story less than an hour after leaving a college seminar about domestic abuse. I think fate can very interesting at times no? This was very well done, and at times I actually was afraid for Rainbow's life. Well done, very well done
Beautiful story. Ohoho God, I luff dis story
I felt in terms of story, this feels quite complete and lovely paced. I thought Rainbow's emotions throughout this was nicely portrayed, and how you connected Granny Smith's "tax" paperwork to what it truly meant was a very, very nice touch.
Poor Rainbow
I read this story after watching Deepwater Horizon and now I'm just so sad and happy. I'm confused. I'm depressed and glad. Both were sad, exciting, made my day, and ruined it.
7625095 Now Dust in the wind just started to play after We will rock you. I'm more confused now!
This was very emotive, and full of feelings. I was afraid for her.
This had a nice, dark to light tone. It really hit me deep. A few spelling and grammar errors, but nobody's perfect. Other than that, great story! Hope to see more! Possibly a sequel of Rainbow's exploits on the farm???
Huh, present tense hurt >.< but a tragic tag wih a happy ending, oh well ^^
7624591 honestly wasn't expecting anyone to pick up on that. Good attention to detail
I was hoping for more, but a damn good story
That seemed a bit personal. And are you from Jersey? I ask because CPS is a jersey thing.
If so 908, 732, or 609?
7627742 actually, yes, I am from NJ. This isn't personal, i can assure you I live with good and decent people. and, that last part, 856
7627751 oof, that is south. I'm right on the hook.
I got family down that way.
And the award for worst mother of the year goes to...
Anyway, good fanfic, glad Rainbow Dash got a happy ending.
7627742 We have CPS in Oregon, too.
7633382 Ironically neither state pumps its own gas.
7633395 HAH
I really enjoyed the abused part..............What's wrong with me........The End had me like "Nooooooooooooooooooooooo" O.o
I imagined that it was Bill Cipher that was taking over Polychrome's body, using alcohol abuse as an excuse. The only problem with Bill's plan though was that he was trapped in there for quite a while. That would've been a weird twist!
7648417
What if I told you that I can make your desire happen?
7656761 then I'd be more than happy
7658874
Very well...I shall soon come up with something of your interest...very soon
Love the ending. Nice story. Though, normally, I feel sorry for her through most of the story.
Sequel please
A Fantastic Story!
Sequel plz
Your review is ready over at the PCaRG.
Awesome story! Why did her mother really hurt her?! that was a bad child abuse!!!
And by the way.. great job, dude!! I really love this, and also.. i feel bad for dash
and, also... applejack do the right thing and she was right!!
I LUV IT
A very moving story. Desperately needs a sequel
There is no sequel​...That needs to be fixed.
Damn. That got me.
Man. Just man. It's over..
Wow thst was ,,I don't have words but but was well written.
MY FEELS! THEY'RE KILLING ME!!!!
I truly connected with this story, I loved it! Please make a sequel!!!
just like me
Really connected with this story rainbow's mother was like my father , drunk and threatening. I really loved this story.
... why was this featured?
9134841
Because I know how to write decent stories
9138747
Pfffft.
9134841
Because it is one of the best takes on the problem of child abuse I've ever seen.
9326267
PFFFFFT.
Also nice necro, nerd.
9326336
Nice necro? What the Gresley are you talking about?
9138747
That you do, sir.
9138747
I agree with EM2. Thanks for the inspiration and for the wonderful story, my man! 💛
9138747
Ya mind if I do a sequel to this from an OC's perspective?
I'll start with the good news. You paced this story really well, and your characterization was pretty strong. It did so many things well.
Unfortunately, the mechanics left a lot to be desired. Your tenses were inconsistent, there were some scattered basic mistakes and typos, and it just generally felt sloppy. They really held the story back, which is super unfortunate because this looks like it could be pretty great otherwise. I think you would have been better served with sticking to past tense.
I want to like this story a lot, but the mechanics just weren't there.