Work hard. Learn. And use your skills to better Equestria. That's a worthy goal for anypony!
As the Ursa Minor problem is drawn to bitter conclusion, Trixie finds herself torn by choices - should she carry on down the harsh and lonely road of her life, now with nothing to her name, or rein in her pride and return to Ponyville to ask somepony for help? At that, will she even learn anything?
[Featured on EqD or something October '11]
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I remember reading this on EQD quiet some time ago, Glad you posted it here
Edit: First!
Loved it, and the ending made me laugh.
Yeah, I read this over on EqD when it was posted. It was a nice change of pace to the "Trixie gets revenge" or "Trixie is down on her luck" stories that where popular at the time. I think writers tend to forget that these characters are willing to help each other out, even if they get on each others' nerves at times.
The language used throughout is certainly avant-garde and gets kinda "purple prose" at times, but it works when you have two characters as snobby as Trixie and Rarity.
This was a delight!
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Having writ this the better half of a year ago...yeah, i cringe and grin a bit when I look through this. I've learned a lot since then, and have really got the purpliness better in hand.
Random tidbit of trivia - this started as a challange fic, when I asked someone to give me two random ponies off the top of their head to see if I could ship 'em. The story immediately smacked me upside the head, said 'No, son, like this' and thus this came to be as is.
One of the most lovely, charming, and delightful fanfics I have read. If its prose is purple, then it is the most delicious purple prose I have perused in recent memory. Many of your little turns of phrase were positively chewy, they were so decadent and dense. Thank you for writing such a scrumptious morsel of a story.
Enjoyed it then, enjoyed it again now. Nice re-reading an old story now and then, hehe. Still wish there was a sequel, too. =P
I remember reading this ages ago! It's a fantastic story, one of the only Trixie ones I really enjoyed
While sometimes a problem, purple prose is something Trixie's narration naturally requires. This is mostly from her point of view and she not only speaks in third person but gives herself a two part title after all.
Nice story, I smiled at how Opal works Trixie and Rarity. She's a cat with a plan!
God that was long. Congratulations.
Halfway through, Rarity says she's "bound by generosity".
That ain't how the Elements work. She's Generosity 'cause she's generous. That's just who she is, what she does, how she lives. She ain't bein' forced ta be generous, she jus' does it on her own; if she had ta be pushed inta doin' it, she wouldn't BE generous.
2189418 Overthinking it.
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Am not. It's a substantial difference.
2454123 It's a turn of phrase. Like "I'm too nice for my own good," or "you'll be the death of me."
Oh, the sweet nostalgia! I remember when I first read this story two years ago when I was but a wee lad with nary a word to his name and saying "Yeah, that was good. That was really good." Now, here I am, two years later, able to explain, in either too much detail or not enough, why I think this is good!
Oh, and by the way, I'm your personal WRITE reviewer. Right! Let's dive in.
First off, I think the concept alone deserves a bit of a mention. This is coming from a man who’s seen nothing but ‘Trixie revenge’ or ‘Trixie redemption’ stories for the past year or so. I know that this was around the time when ‘Boast Busters’ was still relatively new, but it is such a breath of fresh air to see a story with Trixie beginning the story as the jealous, egotistical, and internally conflicted pony that made her one of my favorite minor characters.
That being said, you’ve pretty much gotten her character down to a T, same with Rarity’s character. It made their little back and forths pretty entertaining to read, and did a great job in showing their similarities and differences without cramming them down the reader’s throat.
I especially enjoyed Trixie’s character near the beginning. Seeing her coping with life kicking her while she was down was a joy to see, and that was largely thanks to the narration. There were even times when I legitimately thought that Trixie was the one narrating the story, especially with her refusal to use the word ‘Sparkle’, which was both a nice touch, and a bit jarring when the narration jumped to Rarity’s perspective.
Now, onto the writing itself. Put simply, it’s superb. Definitely one of the better written stories I’ve read in a while. Descriptions were able to paint a clear picture in my head, and time spent in a character’s head gave me enough emotional context for me to really put myself in their (horse)shoes.
However, during the interactions between Trixie and Rarity, I noticed a couple of occasions where you glanced over an entire section of conversation in one paragraph. A nicely written paragraph, mind you, but I couldn’t help but think that it would’ve aided in developing their growing friendship if you wrote the actual conversation rather than summarize it. I counted two times where this happened. Once during their tea time, and again during their time in the bath. Again, not deal-breakers, but still bothersome to people who obsess over character interaction [read: me].
Now, I did see a few complaints about purple prose in earlier comments, and I can see that. However, it doesn’t really bother me, specifically. Might be because I read a good number of books, but some purple is nice as long as it doesn’t drown the story in pompous, pretentious prose. Granted, there are a few moments in this story where the prose is more purple than Barney the Dinosaur pimping Twilight Sparkle, but those moments are few and far between enough for it to avoid being a deal breaker.
As far as spelling errors go, there was only one typo that I was able to find throughout the entire thing:
And that was it. Nothing else that I was able to find.
At the end of the day, this was a fun read, and I’m sure I’d still say that even if I wasn’t a Trixie fan. Excellently written, spot-on characterization, a bit purply at times, and absolutely fun to read. I know I already said that, but I’ll be damned if it isn’t true.
~FoughtDragon01 – WRITE’s Pet Grammar Nazi
Glad I stumbled upon a reference to this somewhere, it was lovely.
This was a good read.
The characterization is exquisite. Why? Rarity. This is Rarity, the heroine who earned the right to call herself the Element of Generosity by showing that she is, indeed, generous. Not the kind of 'generosity' when she gives stuff to her best friends, but the kind of generosity where she's willing to expend hours of her own time (especially considering that this is in the middle of the night) to heal, console and care for somepony who she has every reason to dislike. As another commenter said, these ponies tend to care for one another, and the Elements are supposed to embody their virtues especially. Rarity isn't Generosity because she sometimes act generous, anymore than Applejack gets to be Honesty because she's sometimes honest and upstanding when it suits her needs.
And it works. A bit of kindness in her time of need and Trixie is turned all around. One of my dislikes about Boast Busters is that Trixie is painted as a villain, but at no point does anyone even try being nice to Trixie (other than Snips and Snails, but it's clear that they just want to see something flashy and don't care for the actual pony, and they give up on her immediately when she can't deliver); the 'heroes' harass her right from the start, so why would anyone be surprised when she's nasty back at them? Here, Rarity extends the olive branch that she should have given at the end of the episode (instead of yammering about being 'unladylike') and it makes all the difference.
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I'm glad you liked it so! This fic comes from ages back, when I basically had two ponies picked at random and was challenged to ship them. I opted for friendshipping, of course.
I've toyed with the idea of continuing the story, with Trixie encountering each of the mane six at various points along her journey, but I've always felt it works perfectly well as a complete, self-contained oneshot as well. Trixie needs more love