• Member Since 4th Mar, 2013
  • offline last seen Jul 18th, 2023

superpony55


Comments ( 8 )

Nice one shot. :rainbowdetermined2:

This was exceptionally nice. I actually read it out loud to myself to practice my narration or storytelling voice, and this story just flows off the tongue. It's nice, short, cute, and written incredibly well. Have my like, cause this definitely earned it.

Is it wrong that I really want to see that paining?

Wow, this is something else, in a good way. Now I want to see the painting she made!

She sounds like an impressionist painter like Van Gogh.

Well, how about that? Two years go by and suddenly you write another story! It's a nice one, too, and the dialogue-free, one-character focus works well. I think the last line is unnecessary, and I have seen Rainbow as painter somewhere before, but it's an interesting insight into a side of Rainbow's character we don't often see. Have a like.

This is a Twilight's review review.

I must say, I loved the way this one-shot was written out. The words you used to describe the story gave very detailed imagery. I haven't seen any grammar or spelling mistakes so far, either. Although a suggestion would be to make your story more lengthy. The idea of it is good and all, but it seems a bit too short. Maybe extending it more would give a better ending that was wrapped up nicely. A suggestion could to write about Rainbow's friends finding out her secret and how they would react to it. But overall, this is a pretty nice one-shot. Good job.

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