( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) How do I fly as demonstration man? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
I get sent to Equestria. Yay, very original. Well, I'm not exactly a pony. Am I at least something else that's cool? No. Am I at least something that's worthy of a story being made? No. Am I at least something alive? No. I'm a GOD DAMN ROCK.
Not only is this a parody of every HiE fic, it also explains my crazy theory of the same recurring rock. I also have a kind of grimdark ending that my screw-up mind came up with.
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Oh god, what have I released into this wold?
Moar.....
static.prtst.net/asset-proxy/0f646dbd214789c9052e78d1174913bec000f2ed/687474703a2f2f693330342e70686f746f6275636b65742e636f6d2f616c62756d732f6e6e3137312f4e69636b506f74726f736b692f596f752f4252494c4c49414e542e6a7067/http://i304.photobucket.com/albums/nn171/NickPotroski/You/BRILLIANT.jpg
Huh.
Interesting...
Oh my god! A giant rock!
NEEDS A SEQUEL
We Rock - Dio
I rock, you rock, he she it rocks. Y'know, first grade stuff.
Well that was really unique.
This deserves both a sequel *2 minute break while writing this 'cause of Writer's Block* and a feature on the main page.
After that, I will make another unique story and get FEATURED! Then I will become moderator and overthrow all the other ones. THEN I will own this pathetic site and make it my own! My biggest change will be moar emotes and color changes and more features and formatting.
(These last four sentences were a result of writer's go and writer's crazy, both of which I also have. :)
Writer, I have a tip for you. Start swimming down into the earth and sit there for about a hundred years or so. Your body will be compressed into diamond, the hardest material ever known.
You'll be TRULY invincible then.
As for the story, wow, I've never been so happy about reading about a ROCK :V. Good work!
That... that was... beautiful.
Best HiE Fic EVER.
This is my shot at originality
MOAR
So, this fic got approved at around 8:45 p.m. Pacific time last night. That was around the time I shut down my computer. I got FiMFiction this morning... and I had 32 notifications.
th04.deviantart.net/fs70/PRE/f/2011/285/2/6/cereal_guy_spitting_by_rober_raik-d4clu6f.png
DUMB ROCK!
images.wikia.com/mlp/images/7/72/Rarityrock.png
921619
Nice. I thought he had them all covered... Wait! What about the boulder that trapped Rainbow Dash in Ghastly Gorge?
921907
images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20120626143817/mlp/images/4/40/S2E07_Rainbow_Dash_comes_out_from_behind_boulder.png
Many seem to want more...
...Challenge accepted...
Edit: No one will see this, but lolnope
Uh-huh.
Actually, me and RatherHomely already beat you to this: Rock
Sorry bro.
923441 WELL, DOES YOUR DAMN STORY HAPPEN TO ALSO FEATURE YOUR DAMN ROCK BEING THE ROCK THAT FOUNDED EQUESTRIA AND WAS ROCKY, AND IS GETTING A SECOND CHAPTER WHERE THEY DESTROY EQUESTRIA?! I DON'T THINK SO!
What's funny is that this was the second fic I ever thought up, though I didn't type it until just a couple days ago.
(And P.S. I DON'T GIVE A BUCK THAT I WASN'T THE FIRST TO MAKE IT!)
AHHHHHHHHHHHH
OLD SPICE BODY SPRAY!
923559
No, but it features a guy becoming Tom from season 2 episode 1 and 2.
And cool.
923813 You do realize that I, in fact, DID become Tom?
926023
Huh. Welp, gonna have to go and say you copied us.
926079 LIES, LIES I SAY! I SHALL CONTACT THE MODS TO GET YOU BANNED, BLOCK YOU, CALL THE PRESIDENT TO KICK YOU OUT OF YOUR COUNTRY, CALL THE POLICE TO ARREST YOU, SEND A MESSAGE TO PRINCESS CELESTIA TO SEND YOU TO THE MOON, AND CALL NIGHTMARE MOON TO KILL YOU WHILE YOU'RE THERE!
(You can obviously tell I'm lying.)
926107
What if I already live on the moon? Plus, I have Woona. Better than you have.
Okay, here's what I think:
This is the worst thing I have ever seen. This video pretty much sums it up:
This fiction is the very description of evil. Burn it. Eat it. Shit it. Burn it. Feed it to your cat. Kill your cat. Burn it. Dissect it. Take out the shit. Burn it again. Strap a timed bomb to it. Fart on it. Throw it into a volcano. Jump in with it. Land at the bottom because the bomb-shit was so horribly disgusting that it dissolved every ounce of magma in it. Stomp on it. Fart on it again. Wipe it all over your nipples. Ejaculate on top of it. Roll all over it. Menstruate Maple Syrup onto it. Fart onto it yet again. Bake it in an oven. Send it to Hell. Boil it in armpit sweat. Cry orphan tears all over it. Squeeze buttered shit onto it. Fart onto it. Throw it into the deepest pit in the world and nuke it...
EPIC INHALE...
Fuck it. Shit on it. Bake it. Fart on it. Have a stampede of raging bulls trample it. Pour Rhino semen on it. Cover it in plastic explosives. Let it explode. Urinate all over the remains. Rub lemon juice, salt, and battery acid all over it. Lactate Sour Cream onto it.
Give it nipples. Hook up an industrial battery to the nipples. Electrocute it. Pour a full bucket of Whale sperm all over it. Smear cow excrement all over the remains. Flush it into the Ocean.
Aftermath: The entire water supply of nearly all over the planet is tainted by your Story and you kill of all life.
EPIC INHALE...
People broadcast it in the news. And then a bus full of hot models crashes into a small van of special needs children. Then a tanker carrying a truckload of plastic explosives goes off, detonating nearly half of Alaska. And then a piece of debris falls down from the sky and kills a bunch of Orphans. And then Africa is nuked. And then Australia gets plagued by famine and disease. And then China gets flooded by Political stand offs and bad people. And then America is completely wiped off of the map by a huge asteroid.
And after all of this, the Author is somehow still alive and is plagued by his mind for the rest of eternity as the last person on Earth.
Finally, as an extra precaution to get rid of this volatile piece of shit, God sends the entire Milky Way collapsing in on itself.
AND THAT'S JUST HOW BAD THIS FICTION IS!!!
images.wikia.com/headhuntershorrorhouse/images/3/3d/Exploding_head.gif
I think I made my point.
How was that?! Do I earn a GOLD STAR?! GIMME MY GOLD STAR!!!
I feel like I accomplished something! I am now complete. I will now go and cleanse my brain with bleach.
I'm popular! YAY!
EDIT: Do you see the fucking comment above? You made me type badly! I hate you. I mean, after rereading that comment, I feel bad for myself. My grammar and spelling was tainted by this horrid excuse for a story.
Good day, ass-wipe! Now go and feed your testicles into a sawmill.
Sincerely,
Bacon[Hazard]
P.S. This also gave me cancer. I think I'm also sterile right now. And why wouldn't I be after reading such a horrifying piece of shit?
P.P.S. And if this is hurting your feelings, I'm not sorry, nor will I ever be. But please, just lay off of the Mushroom for a while before writing again, as if I ever wanted you to.
P.P.P.S. Go and die.
P.P.P.P.S. Cure my cancer or I will kill off your blood line.
P.P.P.P.P.S. Did I scare you? Because I in fact liked it very much and you should be commended for it.
am I the only one who skipped the entire thing and only read the ending?
I actually did do that.
Tjats tje tiniest image ive ever seen!!