Chapter 10: The Proposal
They stood there a moment, the human still kneeling before them, head down and arms at his sides.
Applejack spoke up first, "Darlin', ya've worked and lived at mah farm fer almost four weeks now and Ah've seen nuthin' but a hard workin' stallion."
"Yes, and ever so generous, working there for next to nothing while even helping everyone who asks for your help. Nothing short of a gentlecolt if you ask me," Rarity added.
"And so kind, going out of your way to save three fillies from those vicious timber wolves." Fluttershy had maneuvered behind him to inspect his wound.
"Yeah, and you're one of the most awesome humans I know! Even if you're the only one I know...." said Rainbow Dash.
"Not to mention you're super duper fun at parties!"
"And you've helped me learn about stuff I could have never thought existed."
Both Pinkie and Twilight added.
James looked at his hands, still shaking and covered in blood. The coppery smell was almost too much for him.
"There's something you should know about me." James said to the group before him. "I was never just a 'guard'. I did pull some guard duty, but in reality, I'm a killer. I was trained to carry out specialized missions that conventional forces just couldn't. I have so much blood on my hands, it's a wonder that they aren't permanently stained red."
He continued, not really caring about their opinions of him any more. James felt he had betrayed their trust and he didn't deserve friends like them.
"The wounds that you found me with? They were a result of a fight between myself and my own kind. It was in defense of others, but I'm a monster, I've killed so many."
Fluttershy was in the middle of bandaging up James' calf when he stood up and limped towards the exit. The six mares watched him for a minute, in a stunned silence.
"But--" Rainbow Dash began to say, but James sharply cut her off.
"NO. I don't belong here." His words echoed off the vaulted ceiling. As he limped away James shouldered his pack. He was half way down the main passageway when he heard the clop of hooves on stone behind him. James looked over his shoulder to see a sky blue pegasus mare with a look of deep concern on her face. Still, it didn't cover the fear he could see in her rose colored eyes.
"Don't follow me."
"James, you're hurt. You need to let us help you!"
"No. I can't risk hurting you. All of you. I'm too dangerous. Just leave me be."
"If you go back out into that forest alone and injured you could die!" She was almost pleading now.
"I've already died once before, it can't be that bad a second time around! Just Leave. Me. Be!" He snapped at her.
James continued on his way out without looking back. It pained him to do this, he had actually come to like those quirky little ponies, but he wouldn't been able to live with himself if they came to harm because of something he did. He didn't even know how they had found him. James exited the old castle and entered the forest. It was starting to get late and the sun was going down. His calf started to bleed again, the bandages were wrapped loosely because he had left while Fluttershy was in the middle of applying them. Clenching his teeth, James knelt down, gripped the ends of the dressing and pulled tight, putting pressure on the wound. It hurt like hell, but he wouldn't bleed out and he would be able to walk a little better.
James trudged on until he came to a small space that was cleared of under brush, but was still covered by the forest canopy. It would have to do. The sky was darkening to the point where he wouldn't be able to continue. He gathered some wood for a small fire. James plopped himself down in front of his small conflagration to keep warm and dug around in his pack for the small bottle of ibuprofen he carried with him. Pulling out the bottle, he shook two out and popped them into his mouth, taking a swig from his canteen to wash them down. James sat there a moment, wishing he could see the stars and unsheathed his knife. This next part was gonna suck. He stuck the blade into the flames. He hadn't thought to bring his first aid kit and as such, lacked any anti-septic. Rookie mistake.
While he waited for the metal heat, James took out his iPod and put on his headphones. He scrolled through the albums and started playing Darkside of the Moon. James unwrapped the bandages from his leg to assess the damage. Both the entry and exit wounds were approximately the same size. Blood began to trickle from both openings. Carefully, he ripped off the bloody sections of bandage. By now, the blade should be hot enough. Cautiously James extracted the hot steel from the fire. He picked up a nearby stick and bit down on it. Then, taking a deep breath, he pressed the searing metal to his flesh. His cry of anguish was muffled by the stick in his teeth as he bit down hard. He repeated the act a second time, cauterizing both sides, the smell of burnt flesh making him a bit nautious.
James re-wrapped the now closed wounds with the clean bandage scraps he had salvaged. He popped another two pills and took a long draw from his canteen to help calm himself. James rolled his pants back down his leg, retrieved his rain gear from his rucksack and laid back. The painkillers started to kick in as the throbbing went down, although it still burned a little. He put his iPod on shuffle, and after adding wood to the fire, closed his eyes in attempt to sleep. It didn't come willingly, but after an hour, the exhaustion from the days events finally caught up with him.
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Panting, running, sprinting for his life as bullets impacted the dirt around him, kicking it up into his face. The bundle he carried was weighing him down, but he had to reach the building where the marines were pinned at all costs. They had wounded and could not wait for casevac to bring more medical supplies. He launched a stream of rounds back towards the source of hostile fire, not really aiming, just trying to get their heads down.
"RPG!" Someone bellowed a warning
A streak of propellant burned by in front of him, detonating on a wall to his left and sending chunks of concrete shrapnel at him. It stung horrible, but he kept running. He saw a side door burst open on his target building, two infantry men gesturing wildly for him to get inside. Picking up the pace, he vaulted over a pile of rubble and through the doorway.
"Man, are we glad to see one of you guys! The triage is right through there," the marine said pointing while the other closed the door.
He could hear the moans of pain before he even walked in. There were four men, three stretched out on rickety wooden tables, one laid out on the floor. There were also two body bags in the corner, and they were occupied. There was blood smeared everywhere. A corpsman and two other marines grabbed the supplies off his shoulders and quickly broke them out, going to work on the injured. Another marine walked up and pulled him into the front room.
"Good to see ya soldier, I'm Sergeant Maddox. We're really grateful for the med supplies, but where's the rest of your team?"
"They're on their way. The street was too blocked up with burnt out cars and they had to find another route. Give 'em about five more minutes."
"That's about all we have left, another wave of insurgents were spotted a block away by our roof team. We gotta--"
*BOOM*
The room exploded inwards, shrapnel flying every where. He picked himself up off the ground from where the detonation had thrown him. Everything ached and he had a ringing in his ears. His training kicked in immediately. Running up to an intact section of the wall he brought his rifle's optics up to his eyes and went to work, aiming at a building on the other side of an intersection opposite him. Three marines joined in repelling the attack, 7.62 mm rounds striking the area around them.
"We gotta fall back further into the building!" One of them yelled.
"Go go go! I got you guys covered!"
The two to his right retreated to an adjacent room as he switched to full auto and sprayed lead at the muzzle flashes across the intersection, but the one on his left stayed put, not paying attention. He had the tunnel vision.
"Marine! We have to get going!"
A round struck the soldier in the chest, winding him and sending a spray of ceramic shards from the ballistic plate into his face when the top seam of his vest ruptured.
"AAHHHH! MY EYES!"
He grabbed the back of the marine's vest and dragged the injured roughneck backwards to the door way. The hostile soldiers renewed their assault, bullets whizzed and snapped through the air. Three rounds impacted his chest, but his dragon scale armor stopped them, dissipating the energy across the vest. He pulled the marine through the door and looked down to check on the fighter.
"Hey buddy, are you al--"
There was blood and brain matter covering his front. The marine's head was bowed down. He could see a large hole in the back of the leatherneck's helmet which was ringed red with blood. He continued to drag the body around the wall, gently placing it in a corner of the room. The other two marines ran forward to see their friend when a grenade rolled through the entry way.
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James sat up in a cold sweat, his heart thumping wildly in his chest, he clutched his head in his hands, willing the images out of his mind. They were getting worse. His leg was throbbing again. The clandestine warrior noticed it wasn't as cold as it should have been. In fact, the fire was still going strong as if someone had added more wood. It had been at least a couple of hours, it should just be smoldering. James snatched up his knife from where he had left it, the metal now cooled, and looked around. There was a large winged unicorn -- larger even than Big Mac -- with a flowing multi colored mane. She had a golden chest piece featuring a purple gem set in the middle, her head was topped by a crown. She lay across the fire from him, legs tucked comfortably beneath her. She looked at him with kind eyes that matched the gem.
"Bad dream?" Her voice was warm and motherly.
"Who are you?"
"A little blunt I see. Didn't Twilight and her friends tell you about me?" She asked, smiling.
"That depends, who are you?"
"Well, it's not all that important."
"The hell it's not. You're wearing enough gold and jewelry to pay my rent for five years."
"A blunt in your questions, yet you have a sharp mind. Just as Twilight described you in her letters."
"Letters. So, you're one of the Princesses then. I'd expect the one named Luna to be sporting a moon, but since you've got a sun on your flank, I'm guessing you are Celestia."
"You certainly don't disappoint."
"Forgive me for not getting up and bowing ma'am, but at the moment I might have some trouble standing."
"Ah yes, the injury you sustained."
"How did you know? Did the girls tell you? They got out ok, right?"
"Yes, they're all fine, but very worried about you James. Why did you leave them?"
"To protect them."
"How would you be able to do that if you are not there for them?"
"Because I'm protecting them from me. I'm dangerous. I kill. I killed all those... things back there. What were those even? I come from a race addicted to violence." His head hung low.
"James. You are not a bad person. No matter what atrocities humans have committed, YOU have done nothing but give and think of others."
"Atrocities? What the hell do you know about my races 'atrocities'? If you knew the kinds of things my people have been responsible for, you'd have me put down!"
"You mean like the world wars or the genocides?"
James sat there at an absolute loss for words
"How... how could you possibly know about that? Can you get there? Can you send me back?"
Celestia had a slight hint of sadness on her face. "Unfortunately, no."
"Then how did I get here? How did THIS get here?" He asked angrily while producing his Lieutenant's revolver.
"The magic that brought you here occurs naturally in this forest, especially near those ruins. It permeates the air, water and even the ground beneath you. Apparently it can sometimes shift objects from your world to ours. I have been collecting and studying any of those objects my scouts happen to come across, locking up the more dangerous ones. You are actually the only organic specimen to cross over. This magic is very powerful and can not be replicated to the same degree, even by ones as powerful as myself."
"So this is it, huh? I can't get back."
"I'm afraid not. James, I must ask you a favor. Those creatures you fought in the old palace are unlike any I've seen in my lands. All we know is they came out of the mountains to the east and have been pillaging villages of the griffon colonies, breaking their nests and slaughtering their subjects. Reports from survivors say the monsters are skilled warriors. Griffons are warriors in their own right, so to hear this from them is disturbing. And yet, you defeated four of them in open combat."
"Let me guess, you want me to fight and kill these things on your behalf." James said, sounding annoyed. "I'm done killing. I already killed for one country, I don't want to kill anymore."
"I don't necessary need you to kill, nor do I want you to. But I would deeply appreciate it if you saw fit to train my royal guard. They are skilled in small matters, but in large conflicts, they have no experience. I fear this threat may grow to that."
James considered it. "Have they killed before?" The Princess was a bit taken aback by the question.
"Excuse me?"
"Have they killed before?"
"Well... no, but...."
"Because that is what you're asking me. You are asking me to turn the ponies of your royal guard into trained killers like me. If you want them to effectively combat this, they can give no quarter. Those creatures are blood thirsty and absolutely without mercy. The first thing they did when meeting me was challenge me to a death match. I don't want to do this to them."
"James, think of the friends you made back in Ponyville. Think of the innocents that live there and the suffering you could spare them from."
"Wow, that was... that's low." *sigh* "Fine, I'll do it."
"Thank you James. You don't know how much this means to me. You can have access to everything you need at our Canterlot facilities."
"No, I will conduct their training near Ponyville. I'll need wide open spaces and a nearby body of water to do this. We will also be spending a lot of time in the forest. The training will include survival and small unit tactics. Now I can't train everyone at once so I need you to send five of your most intelligent and physically fit guards. Once they've been trained, they can pass it on to other units."
"Well I'm certainly not used to one of my subjects giving ME orders." She giggled.
"I'm not one of your subjects."
The Princess of the Sun stopped laughing, surprised by the comment.
"We might have to consider making you a citizen here. The guards might take it better getting bossed around by somepony of their own country."
"I wouldn't mind that. It's not like I have anywhere else to be." They both laughed a little at that.
"I'm sorry, but I must be getting back to Canterlot. Would you like a ride into town?" She asked, yawning wide.
"Thank you for the offer, but I'd like to make my own way back. Give me some time to think."
"If you insist, but before I go..." she rose to her hooves and walked around the fire to James. She knelt down and placed the tip of her horn on his leg as her horn began glow. The pain in his calf receded before vanishing altogether. The Princess leaned away and James unwrapped and inspected the wound, miraculously finding nothing but smooth skin.
"Thank you," he murmured, still astounded by the whole magic thing.
Princess Celestia just smiled, her horn starting to glow again. Then she vanished in a flash of light. James sighed again before laying back down to sleep. He had a long walk in the morning.
Your story is neat, have a first comment, thumb up and favourite.
This is very excellent. Not many HiE fics catch my interest these days, but yours sure has. I will definitely favorite this and await further chapters. Keep up the great work!
OK, I chugged the whole 10 chapters. Must say, I'm impressed. I especially liked Celestia's part, you portrayed her in a rather unique way that you don't really see too often.
:3 MOAR
I really like it, aside from a few spelling errors I can't see anything wrong. One thing you shouldn't do, though, is chapter dump; space them out a bit more and release them at set intervals (say, 1 chapter every 2-3 days).
And i am done. This was very good, but seeing a person breaking down like this, especially a strong character like James, destroyed that.
I could understand if someone died while he is trying to protect them....but this seems like a cop out to me. I'm sorry, but can't read anymore because the character was weaken severely because of this.
I liked the turn it took but i'm still pretty pissed that james turned out to be a bleeding heart. Just not as big of one as i first thought. Though his freakout last chapter, going off with next to no supplies while injured not to mention leaving most of his weapons and other gear back at town...... that does not fit at all with the character you portrayed him as before all this. It feels as if you changed him just so this part would fit in which is not a good thing to do. =/
Would have fit more if he had just closed down barely responding to what they where saying to him before allowing them to lead him back to town. Afer he gets back he would wait til he's alone (pretending to get over it if needed) then slip away leaving a note or something. Thats what someone trained would do not just romp off injured leaving most of his stuff like a child.
this guy is a pussy for being a soldier. I know soldiers don't like killing but they know why they have to do it. This guy sounds like a militant more than an actual soldier so he is really out of character and I can see this throughout the entire story so far.
1105669 Not every soldier is the same.
Can't say I like the drastic personality shift on a dime. I'd understand some PTSD, but he's just freaking out out of nowhere as if he had never killed anything before. What bugs me most of all is the cliche and nonsensical "I have to protect them from me" whining. How the hell is he a danger to them? Yeah he's really good at fighting and killing things, and so far that has been a good thing that has helped protect them. Does he expect himself to suddenly go on a rampage through town and murder everypony? The idea that he is in any way a danger to the others, not to mention charging off into the forest bleeding profusely from a leg wound is just unforgivably idiotic. After that, the interaction with Celestia just felt stiff and didn't feel believable at all. It's like a completely different story by a different author was suddenly mashed onto the end of this one.
I really liked the story so far, and I really want to keep liking it, but it's getting difficult.
I... think I see what you tried to do with James and his little breakdown last chapter-- you needed a reason for James to have a one-on-one conversation with Celestia that wouldn't have looked suspicious to the Mane 6. Of course, knowing what you were trying to do doesn't change the fact that you you went about it in a... let's just say you could have done a lot better, for all the reasons 1192355 mentioned. Seriously, with how unshaken James has been about landing in Equestria, he should have been fairly calm, maybe even a little tongue in cheek ("Err... any chance we could call what I did 'human guard magic' and leave it at that?"), even considering his PTSD. The breakdown should have come much later, maybe after he's settled down to the peaceful life in Equestria, but is suddenly and violently thrown back into the life of a killer and soldier, or something along those lines.
Also, DamselInDistress!Rainbow Dash? ...Actually, I could kinda see that particular situation from two chapters before happening. Yeah, RD probably wouldn't have taken Lightning's shit, but James doesn't know that-- he stepped in before Lightning could hit her. Besides, sometimes the rough-and-tumble girls need to be put in a softer light, am I right?
Overall, an interesting HiE fic so far. I can't wait to see how the next 27 chapters go...
Well seals are trained to take high stress levels, and i dont think going to equestria is more stressful than any OP.
so why is james still being a pussy?
well thankyou stealer for breaking it down,
Doesn't James have a family back home? Wife and an unborn child?
I haven't noticed him reminiscing about them once.
1262106
No, his friend did.
This is the Celestia we all love and cherish.
That was a heart warming bit.
Yeah, no. Everything was either in my last comment, or the others in this chapter. I hope you've learned and grown while writing this fic, but I'm not going to slog through another 50 chapters just to see if the characterization gets more believable, and if you managed to get an editor or three.
Fuck its that spongebob again ._. its so creepy thats what i imagine those things looked like!!!!
I come from a race addicted to violence.
Well take a collective shit on humanity, why don't you
2714653 he right a lot of us are
dam
2714653
Yeah, we kinda love the whole violence thing. Just look at the bestselling video games and movies. There is a reason those things sell.
3352380 Don't forget about the Pyromaniacs like me and my dad... and his dad... and his dad... and his dad..... Ya... the male side of my family is abit crazy when it comes to fires...
1239850 If you don't feel bad about killing other people, making orphans, widows, and widowers, then you are no longer human. They are trained to take high stress levels, but that doesn't mean they don't get tired of killing, of war, of watching people die.
1239850 a SEAL is also trained to think of all life as sacred and to protect all who they can. If you injure a civilian when you could have easy avoided it you can get court martial. If you kill one, you are out of the SEALs.
Well, omitting the part where I want to shout: "Oh my god, this is one of the most chiche-filled HiE soldier fics and why the hell does he pussy so much, he's a professional soldier ffs" I want to ask: wtf with every US gun shooting 7,62? Afaik M4/M16 use 5,56. M240 using 7,62 I can get, it's a machine gun after all, but I haven't seen anything about Ms using it. Correct me if i'm wrong, I don't have actual guns after all.
Too generic and predictable. Can't read anymore.
I know it's a bit late. But I find it a tad unbelievable James would just give up his citizenship the the United States. For god's sake he's a Seal, who's emblem is an eagle carrying a flintlock and trident, which is also tattooed on his chest. And he would renounce his country(which is essentially treason) without a second thought? Just seems odd to me.
4553626
Speaking from experience:
Killing is no more unnatural to a human that it is to a shark. When attacked, you will respond. Violently. For one man to kill another is as old as the human race itself. You will only feel bad about causing death if you let yourself feel bad. There is no regret, nor remorse, when there is neither thought nor mercy.
In my own military career I killed boys barely out of puberty simply because they had fallen in with the wrong people. I killed men who had families and friends and I don't feel any guilt over it.
My point is: you don't always have to feel bad.
Though I guess karma is a bitch. My time in the army came to a painful end when some religion-crazed bugger shot out my eye and a grenade took my leg as a trophy.
Lots of little errors but my biggest complaint (not that it'll be fixed at this point) is that the passage of time is not emphasized in the least. Roughly four or five days have been described, maybe six, but thus far a supposed four weeks passed. Time skips are acceptable in stories but they must be announced in some way.
6324293 I have a friend of the family who is a Vietnam vet and came back with severe PTSD. The things James is going through and suffering are very realistically portrayed here. From what I've seen of what can happen it can drive a being to insanity. I find this book admirable because of it's realistic portrayal.
6688895 I am an Iraq and Afghanistan war vet, and after coming home, I can see the realism here. It doesn't get easier, and it never goes away. Honestly, This is similar to how I felt.
This guy is a fucking idiot I mean what the fuck he has been killing for years and he has a fucking mental breakdown NOW just what the fuck author I hate this part of the story it is a stupid way for the truth to get out.
8172663
Its called PTSD
8172663
Your not truly seeing it through the m.c. eyes.
Maybe some of you don't understand or believe this but A Warrior's true goal is to lay down their swords. Take a minute to understand what I'm trying to say that's even if you give a damn.
8726366
wise words sir, wise words
4778747
Ever heard of PTSD?
4778747
The references to 7.62 rounds is from the insurgents ak47s not from American rifles. Also not everyone can kill a bunch of people and be okay afterward. War leaves scars that run deep. Soldiers never come back the same. My grandfather didn't and neither did my cousins. So unless you have served kindly put a cork in it.
Now we know that all those missing socks go to the everfree.
9164394 Agreed. If you want to go kill someone, Nathaniel, have at it. When you do, try and tell us you don't feel some regret.
Uh huh.. where did the grenade come from
10069676
It got tossed in, I assume.