Applejack really wished Twilight was awake right now, because she was the smart one and she would have really liked her input.
As soon as she saw that unicorn levitate that magically suppressing horn ring up to her head, she had tried to leap to her friend's defense, only to be ambushed by two other ponies from behind, and she wasn't the only one.
So now, what Twilight had hoped would be nothing more than an investigation had ended with the four of them tied by their back hooves, hanging upside-down from the thickest tree branch they could find.
The cowpony struggled, trying to make the ropes come loose, but such actions proved fruitless. Clyde and Pinkie were having no better luck, their own struggles only serving to tire themselves out. Twilight hung limply, unconscious from the beating she had taken.
"We might as well save our strength," Clyde said finally, allowing himself to limp. "We'll still need to fight our way out of here if we do get free."
The ponies guarding them apparently weren't bothered by their discussion of escape. The unicorn that had taken down Twilight was talking to one of his subordinates, a pegasus with a lightning bolt cutie mark.
"Make sure Olive Branch gets this quickly. He's about to go into negotiations with Celestia, and this will tip the scales in his favor."
The pegasus nodded in approval, and like a shot he was in the air, heading toward Canterlot.
Nodding in approval, he turned to a group of ponies that he had apparently collected when his captives weren't paying attention. They were all large, nearly as big as Big Macintosh, three earth ponies and two unicorns.
"Just keep them in place. That horn ring should block the lapdog's powers, and our files on the other two say they're too stupid to be much of a threat." Applejack shouted at this insult, but she was ignored. "The time is right. Four of the six Bearers are our prisoners, and the remaining are the prissy ones. We can finally go after our target, and I will lead you there."
"But Olive Branch said..."
"He didn't know what would happen! We have a chance! That beast will die!"
"No!" two simultaneous voices yelled as Applejack and Pinkie Pie both began thrashing anew. It was Applejack who managed to get the first words out. "If you lay a hoof on that boy, I'm gunna..."
She was hit by a blast of magic from one of the unicorns. It didn't burn or hurt her seriously, but the force still knocked the wind out of her, ending her sentence with a strange groan. Turning back to the assembled ponies, he spoke again. "Fillies and gentlecolts, we're about to do a great service for Equestria. Onward!"
Soarin groggily returned to consciousness only to remember why he had been knocked out. He attempted to open his eyes and focus, but his vision was greatly blurred. His wings were unresponsive, he realized, they had been bound to the sides. He was hogtied too... not a good sight to wake up to.
"Rainbow?" he tried to call, but it came out as "Ruhnbow?"
A scratchy moan answered him. He turned and saw Rainbow Dash, hogtied and wingbound like he was, still teetering on the edge of consciousness.
"Well, this is great... I thought seeing you tied up would be a little more enjoyable than this."
He could hear Spitfire scold him for not taking a situation seriously as he looked around. He was still in the Delivery family's home, he would guess. It looked like a basement, at any rate, with a water heater and a few boxes of Hearth's Warming decorations. What was an unusual attribute was the cage.
It wasn't professionally made, that was for sure. It looked rather makeshift, but he knew it would hold. That much was clear.
"Ugh... Soarin? What happened? Wait... the dinner..."
"Looks like you were right, something was up," he noted. Rainbow Dash began struggling against his binds. "No, save your strength."
"'Save my strength'? Scoots is in trouble, we need to get..."
"I know, but tiring yourself out won't help," he said bluntly. "You want to be a Wonderbolt? Rule one, you need to keep cool under fire. Now, we need to assess the situation."
"How?"
“We let this simmer for a moment," he said, dropping his voice to a whisper. "Eventually, a guard will walk in, and believe me, they're suckers if you play them right."
As if on cue, a door opened, bathing light into the room. Immediately Rainbow Dash took this as a sign to start yelling. "You... I'm going to...”
“P-please don’t be mad,” a little voice whimpered.
All of Rainbow Dash’s anger melted away when she realized who it was, replaced by fear. “Scootaloo? Are you okay? Did he do anything to you?”
“He... he stepped on my wing... when I told him what you said. Please, I didn’t know he was going to do this...”
“Scoots, listen, you need to get us out. Open the cage and untie us.”
“...I... I can’t. He’s going to be really mad if I...”
“Scoots, listen: I can help you, I can protect you from him.”
Soarin’ spoke up. “What your dad is doing is wrong, it’s illegal. If you let us go, I guarantee he won’t get to you.”
“...But, he’s my dad...”
“He hurt you, Scoots!” Rainbow Dash’s voice was enough to shatter glass at that moment, and despite Soarin’s attempts to shush her, she went on. “Why would you want that?”
“He just did it because... I disobeyed him...”
“That’s not a good dad! Scoots, listen, you need to...”
“Scootaloo? What the Tartarus are you doing down there?”
Scootaloo froze and began shaking as her father descended the basement stairs. “I told you to stay out here. Honestly, can’t you do anything right?”
“Don’t you talk to her like...”
“Shut it,” the father growled, walking down the stairs. “You little lapdogs trying to tell me how to raise my foal. I swear, that’ll be over soon.”
“You’re working for Olive Branch,” Soarin stated. There was no question, just the tone asking for confirmation.
“Yeah,” he said. “I am. He was happy when he found out I could get you here, and he was even happier when he found out that Celestia’s attack dog ended up caught.”
“You...” Rainbow Dash’s anger increased. “If you hurt her, I’m...”
Speedy Delivery reached through the bars and struck the mare in the muzzle. It was hard, and it drew blood.
“Daddy,” Scootaloo said, starting to tear up, “please don’t...”
“Would you rather I hit you instead?”
“...N-no...”
“Then get upstairs. Now.”
Crying, Scootaloo sprinted up the steps, tripping twice in her haste, before she was out the door.
“Look what you’ve done to her. She used to be a good kid before you got a hold of her.”
“She’s better than you deserve,” Rainbow Dash spat, but at the same time she was doing her best to wiggle away from her captor.
“Another example of Celestia trying to control our lives. You damn dogs coming in here trying to tell me how to raise my foal...”
“Listen,” Soarin said, hoping he would speak over his marefriend’s insults, “if you really have a problem with the way Celestia’s running things...”
“Don’t even try telling me trying to talk her into stepping down would work. She’s been ruler for over a thousand years. But she’ll step down. Olive Branch is on his way to make sure of that.”
Olive Branch entered the castle to a thunderous applause. The crowd being held outside the gates were all too happy that their efforts had paid off. They were pushing forward, doing everything outside attacking the guards to see their leader one more time.
“Olive Branch? Please stay still.”
The guards who spoke it received only a customary nod as they searched his assistants’ saddlebags. Finding nothing offensive, they instructed, “Come this way.”
The unicorn nodded, motioning to the two earth ponies with him to follow the guard. It was a quiet walk to Celestia’s throne room.
The escort entered first. “Presenting Olive Branch,” he announced, stepping aside and allowing the three guests to enter.
“Thank you,” the unicorn said, levitating two bits toward the guard. He looked at them with a mix of surprise at the generosity and outright revulsion at having the protesters’ coins. Eventually, he pocketed them, vowing to spend them as soon as possible.
The throne room was empty besides Celestia and Luna. In its center was a table, surrounded by five chairs. Two of them were occupied by Celestia and Luna, the former looking calm and serene, while the later was barely hiding her contempt.
“Olive Branch, I’m glad you could make it. Please sit down.”
Even through everything he had preached, Olive Branch admired how calm the Princess of the Sun was being. He took his seat, his assistants sitting on either side of them.
“Care for tea?”
“Two sugars, please,” he said politely, and his assistants followed suit.
“Well then, now that we’ve had the customary greetings, let’s get down to it. I would very much like to hear your list of grievances. I trust you narrowed it down to the most extreme?”
“I asked the citizens what they wanted,” he nodded, levitating the list out of his assistant’s pack and sliding it toward the Princesses. They scanned the list, finding the expected demands, that Shining Armor be replaced, that security be tightened, that more power be taken out of their hooves.
“And what matter would thou wish be focused on first?”
“The list isn’t anything I care about. You may do what you wish.”
That was not an answer either sister had expected. They both stared at the supposed revolutionary until finally Luna said, in a blunt tone, “What?”
“I really don’t care how you run Equestria. It doesn’t matter to me in the end.”
There was another silence.
“Do you mean to tell me that this whole movement... was a lie?” Celestia said, anger entering her voice.
“No... only my part. I’ve been wanting an audience with you for awhile, but a common pony like myself has a hard time getting an audience with royalty, and even a noble couldn’t meet with you in private like I wanted. They served a purpose I needed, but I’m finished with them. Still, they won’t be done with you, so I suggest keeping a hold of that list. You’ll need it.”
“You foal!” Luna cried, slamming her hoof on the table. “You caused all this trouble for a selfish motive?”
“Cause it? Hardly. Your incompetence did that, I merely took advantage of it. By the way,” he levitated another slip of paper out of his assistant’s pack and slid it to them. “This is the address of one of my followers. He’s abusing his foal. I’d put a stop to that.”
The two Princesses gaped at this. Olive Branch shrugged. “What? I’m not heartless. Now I suggest you listen to my request.”
“Insolent cur! This one good deed does not make up for all your trouble! We will not negotiate with the likes of...”
A raised wing silenced her. But it wasn’t done because Celestia was being kind. She glared a glare usually reserved for Discord or Chrysalis and said, in a growl, “What is it that you want?”
“I want something you have been keeping to yourselves ever since you took the throne. I want immortality.”
Twilight awoke with a groan. She looked around through blurred and was hit with vertigo, though she didn’t know why. She tried to piece together what had happened. She tried lighting up her horn. She couldn’t feel her magic.
She remembered her brain feeling like it had been split apart. She realized what must have happened: a horn ring. It was suppressing her magic now, and having it be placed so unexpectedly had caused her magic to be pushed back into her.
Through all this thinking, she hardly noticed she was hanging upside down until she heard Applejack’s call. “Twi? Twi?”
“Huh... whoa!” she suddenly was awake enough to notice her surrounding. “What happened?”
“They got us, Twi,” the earth pony moaned. “I’ve been trying to break free, but it’s no good.”
“Ooh! Now that Twilight’s awake, I’ll bet she can do something fun! Oh! Break the ropes and do some super cool magic stuff...”
“Pinkie,” Clyde said patiently, “horn ring.”
“Oh... right.”
“Still, I trust a pony of your caliber knows how to remove it?”
“Don’t bet on it,” one of the guards said, though he hardly looked at them. “That ring’s as high a caliber as you can get without being able to suppress an alicorn.”
“Cute,” Twilight thought, as she began concentrating.
“Ya gotta figure a way out of here quick, Twi,” Applejack said. “Most of them varmints went after Spike.”
Twilight froze. Or she would have, hanging by a single rope meant all four ponies were swaying. “What?”
“It’s true,” the guard said, looking at her with a malicious smile. “By now, that beast is likely a dragon skin rug.”
“What?”
A silence hung in the throne room.
A very angry silence.
“Immortality?” Celestia repeated, not quite believing it.
“I know you figured out how to make yourselves immortal through the Source. I’m all set to head there myself, I simply need the key you know and...”
“Foal!” Luna shouted, using her Royal Canterlot voice once more. “You’ve wasted our time for a curse?”
“Believe me,” Celestia said coldly, “I would give you immortality if I knew how and I didn’t shudder to think what a pony like you would do with such power.”
“Oh don’t give me that ‘immortality is a curse’ nonsense,” the unicorn waved a hoof dismissively. “It’s allowed you to reign for a millenium. I want that kind of power... oh don’t worry, fighting the two of you would be too much work. I’ll find my own kingdom to rule. I think I could whip the griffons into shape...”
Celestia stood. “We’re done here. My guards will escort you out.”
“Are you sure you want that, Your Highness? I think you might want to reconsider when you learn who I have.”
“What?”
Luna’s roar was accompanied by Celestia whirling around glaring at him. “Hostages? Honestly? That’s your plan?”
“Indeed. Ponies will die...”
“I cannot risk the thousands of lives you will ruin to save any hostages. What makes you think I would?”
“Please. The reason the invasion happened is you considered the comfort of your niece more important than the lives of your citizens.”
Two pairs of eyes went wide as the Princesses gaped at their opponent’s knowledge.
“Oh yes, I know Twilight tried to warn you. I was saving that as a trump card to tell the public if you refused to see me, but it proves my point. Now then, I merely have to use my magic to send the signal, and Twilight Sparkle will die. And before you get any ideas on trying to stop me, if I don't send the all clear signal every thirty minutes, my associates have orders to kill them anyway.”
“You beast! Release Twilight Sparkle at once or I shall...”
Luna was cut off. But not by Olive Branch. By her sister. It hadn’t been a gesture to be silent, even that wouldn’t have quieted her rage now.
It was laughter.
Not a simple chuckle, or a sarcastic laugh. No, it was full, deep belly laughter. The Princess of the Sun lost her composure as she fell bottom down on the table, laughing like Olive Branch had told the most hilarious joke she had heard in her incredibly long lifetime. Her hoof pounded the table in rhythm to her roars as tears rolled down her her cheeks. Her laughs became labored pants as the other four ponies looked on feeling a bit disturbed.
“Wh-what’s so funny?” Olive Branch demanded, trying and failing to sound intimidating.
“I’m... I’m... okay, I think I’m okay now,” Celestia said, righting herself. “It’s simply this: in the centuries I’ve ruled, have seen some truly foalish... no, that’s too kind... idiotic attempts at my throne, or equally half backed assassination attempts. Your base plan is full of holes as it is. Suppose I gave you what you wanted. Then what’s to stop me from hunting you down after you released your hostages? Especially since you told me where you were going. I could have a squad on you long before you ever reached the Source. And since you were dropping your group, nopony would likely know of your disappearance.”
“I... I had plans!” Olive Branch said, in the single most transparent lie Celestia had ever heard.
“But picking Twilight Sparkle... my student, as your hostage, takes the proverbial cake. It pushed your scheme far past a mere annoyance and made it amusing. I shall treasure this memory.”
“I don’t think you understand,” Olive Branch shouted. “It only takes one message from me and your lapdog is dead. Twilight Sparkle is safely restrained!”
“Let me guess, you had some Royal Guards working from the inside lend it to you? You must have had inside assistance to know of what exactly happened the eve of the wedding. I’ll be conducting an investigation to find and punish them soon, thank you for telling me. I take it they gave you a standard issue? You didn’t try for the true military grade I keep locked away?”
“Y-yes... it will hold her!”
“No it won’t. I trained and mentored Twilight myself, and she came to my attention through her raw power. Now tell me, what makes you think standard issue will be enough to hold her?”
A blast of magic hit the guard, sending him flying. The remnants of a horn ring landed somewhere in the grass, while Twilight and her fellow hostages fell to the ground, being stopped by Twilight’s magic for a soft landing.
They readied themselves for resistance and found none. The lead unicorn had only left four guards, and the three remaining conscious ones had wisely decided to run.
Twilight had no clever quip, nothing to say. She simply began racing towards Ponyville, and the others quietly followed.
Next chapter soon!
Yay! Updated! Are there smarter ponies in the organization?
Rabble Rouser? Appropriate name.
Still, Olive Branch just showed how out of his league is. Celestia has ruled for 1000 years. No pony is going to be able to take it from her. I mean, thinking they would just him get to the Source, that they'll be able to keep Twilight restrained (through I do wonder why she doesn't teleport ASAP) and that hey 'considered the comfort of your niece more important than the lives of your citizens' just shows all the mistakes he made where.
This totally has the wrong story tag. Nothing about being drugged, massive conspiracies in Equestria or attempts to dethrone a reigning monarch is "Slice Of Life". It's an Adventure through and through.
Oh dear sweet lord, Celestia's reaction was the best thing ever.
In my opinion, it was a good move. Having Celestia genuinely laugh out loud at his stupidity felt good. Too much stories around that have Celestia being outwitted or outsmarted, as if she hasn't been doing this for a thousand years. Very good. Seeing Olive Branch lose his composure as Celestia broke down roaring with laughter was priceless. On the other hoof, I'm not really surprised that it turns out the bastard was just in it for selfish gains, and using the dumb populace to mask his true goals, it fits his personality. I do hope Celestia has more humiliation for him in store. And of course, Scootaloo's dad has to die, that much is obvious.
Heh heh, let them at least go out with a bang Twi but make them suffer. Olive branch is an utter twit, why the fuck does he think the source will find him worthy of ascension Well I hope his end is suitably Ironic
Did not see that coming. Like, seriously. And, wow, really Olive Branch? Immortality?
It calls to mind the old Star Fox comics, wherein Fox early on accepts as a "lavish reward" a collection of 4 tickets to a first class cabin. When later scolded by Falco, and told that he could have "asked for a moon," Fox retorts happily, "Moons aren't nearly this comfortable."
Remember this, kids: When negotiating over hostages, don't go for broke. Go for awesome.
... Yay. Continue.
For the dumb ones that are going to get spike
memecrunch.com/meme/UUA/run-you-fools/image.png
Immortality, you say? Perhaps you should've gone after the Dragon Balls instead. Oh, wait...
Also, I enjoyed how you handled the horn ring. Highest power, you say? Sorry, but this one's only rated to 9,000 and my power's over that. /shameless pun
YAY! We finally got to this moment in the story hehe. MOAR!
"Just keep them in place. That horn ring should block the lapdog's powers, and our files on the other two say they're too stupid to be much of a threat."
Can these guys not count to four?
Fun stuff! Loving this story, and the next chapter needs to come out sooner than later!
Twilight Sparkle isn't one that can be locked up! Ha!
If anyone tries to hurt Spike, they get to deal with the roaring rampage of revenge. Should be fun to see. From a safe distance!
Immortality... I honestly don't know if I should be disappointed for this being the true motive of Olive Branch, or impressed by the fact that you managed to hid it from us for so long. Either way, I can't wait to see how the negotiations go now. That scene with Celestia was bound to put him a bit off (and made us all happy)
Okay, I apologize if this comes out wrong but I feel like I need to tell you this. The last few chapters of this story have left me literally shaking and seething with anger, I don't think I've ever felt such burning hatred for anything in fiction than what I felt towards your antagonists. And that...is really pretty awesome. The fact that you could get such an emotional reaction is really telling of you skill. I know you've probably heard something like this several times but, seriously, amazing work.
And after going through all rage, this chapter made it all worth it! Seeing such a smug character's plans fall to pieces the instant he tries to make his big move was just so sweet and satisfying. Sincerely sorry for doubting you and eagerly looking forward to more.
With all the stuff happening in the story recently, I'm not sure if Slice of Life is the appropriate tag for this anymore.
I'm glad that a basic power suppressor didn't work on Twilight.
All of this for immortality... huh, I didn't expect that. Did this guys seriously think he was going to win over ponies who had been going through this kind of shit for 1000 years. What a moron.
Anyway, we get some more angry twilight and I approve! NEXT CHAPTER NOW
Wow. That's it? That was Olive Branch's big plan? What an idiot.
Ha ha! Olive Branch you FAIL! Goldarn I love seeing a would-be megalomaniac finding out that they're not as a clever as they like to think they are. I sense epic pwnage coming down and I Cannot wait! After all the crap Twi and Spike and RD and Scoots have been put through....time to bring down the thunder!!!!
Considering how poorly it went for the dragons earlier in the story, the ponies going after Spike are going to be lucky if they get out of this without permanent maiming.
Celestia's reaction: priceless.
Well it was unexpected that Olive Branch was not the mastermind but just in it for some foolish gain. Celestia laughing at Olive's attempt to restrain Twilight was good and I'm waiting to see the rampage that ensures.
Well, that was an unexpected twist. However, I like it.
Given what we've seen of Twilight when she rages - especially when Spike is in danger - Applejack, Pinkie, and Clyde's jobs are no longer wrecking havoc on the bad guys. Their job is to keep Twilight from killing them.
Oh, and after saving Spike, when Twilight's mind goes to what they said about Rainbow...I don't think anypony could honestly bring themselves to keep her off Speedy Delivery...but I'm betting Rainbow does.
Rainbow? Why would you stop me? You know what he's done! You know what he deserves!
No arguments there, Twi. But Scootaloo doesn't!
Huh?
Scootaloo's been hurt enough. I'm not going to let you compound that by letting her see him killed right before her eyes!
...alright, take her outside. THEN I'll-
No! We have more than enough evidence now. We're taking this before Celestia, and Scoot can see her father face justice, not vengeance.
To Olive Branch and his followers.
All in all, I like this.
It makes sense that Olive Branch wouldn't be so prepared that he could outsmart two immortals who have been living for well over a thousand years. Quite simply put, he doesn't have enough info. He has no idea what it's like to be immortal and thus, can't plan for that, oh sure he can make a very general goal, found his own kingdom, but such and idea is so basic and so riddled with ways it could go wrong that it is very likely to go wrong.
He is very competent, but what most people seem to forget is that, as a whole, many people are competent. Olive Branch is not a master chessmaster like Moriarty or some of the Batman Villains. He is very intelligent, but he cannot and has not made a foolproof plan by any means. A villain like him who is a normal person, not some God of Chaos or Evil, is much more prone to making mistakes and will make many mistakes. That's another thing that sometimes gets forgotten is that villains aren't incapable of messing up, and, just like a hero's mistakes tends to be far more damaging (because so much is riding on the hero most of the time), the villains mistakes are pretty likely to completely undo and destroy all their plans, or at least damage them severely.
Also, I have no trouble believing two things, that Olive Branch is really using all the other ponies. The other is how he reports Scootaloo's parents. This is what is known as a "Pet the Dog" moment (from tv tropes). This is where the villain (or some dark character), who has been portrayed in a very negative or grim light, does something kind or is at least decent for once. This however, is oftentimes not enough to redeem them but can be very deceiving to some people. Just because someone is nice once will never mean (all by itself) that they are a good person. While they might have one good trait or a moment of goodness, it never makes them good overall. Olive Branch is still a villain, in spite of the fact that he doesn't approve of child abuse.
To quote Doctor Who (the Ninth Doctor played by Christopher Ecclston) when addressing a villain who had a "Pet the Dog" moment in which she spared the life of someone who could (and most likely would've) pulled her scheme apart by the seams.
Blon: I spared her life.
Doctor: You let one of them go, but that's nothing new. Every now and then, a little victim's spared... because she smiled, cos he's got freckles, cos they begged. And that's how you live with yourself, that's how you slaughter millions, because once in a while, on a whim, if the wind's in the right direction, you happen to be kind.
I think this sums up the concept and why it doesn't make Olive Branch a good person quite nicely.
So, to put it plainly, good job. I also like both the subtle, and the not so subtle ways that Scootaloo's parents are abusive. At first, it's mostly that they just treat her like a baby with no real care for what she thinks about it. But when she stands up for herself, that's when things get blatant. Scootaloo is often made either an orphan, or has abusive parents due to the simple fact that her parents (if she has any) have never appeared in the show to date. And personally, I like how you've done the situation. Thought I do wonder what Scootaloo's mother is doing right now?
I did like the part where Celestia pretty much loses it to a laughing fit. It's in keeping with her that she (as an immortal) and Twilight (as the most powerful Unicorn shown on the show) can think of so many ways to get out of a magic dampener which was designed for normal unicorns. Twilight is like the Dumbledore of Unicorns, she's far more powerful than pretty much everyone except Celestia, Luna, and arguably Cadence because her special talent is magic, plain and simple.
Sorry if I've ranted, but you said you were interested in the fans response so I gave a long response.
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Good to know that I'm not the only one with such thoughts. I can see it now...
What's the scouter say of her power level?!
It's OVER NINE-THOUSAAAAAAND!
WHAT?! Pinkie... we're bucked. It was nice knowing you.
Nice knowing you too, Dashie!
One, and only one problem.
"immortality is a curse...?"
Bullcrap. To say that is to say that life is a curse. Which is just fine if you're selling t-shirts to whiny disaffected teenagers at Hot Topic, but it's not a rational worldview anywhere else.
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I doubt Twilight even had to think up a way to get out of the magic suppressor. Given how confident Celestia is that the standard-issue suppressor won't hold her, I'll bet Celestia taught Twilight how to break one.
As for Olive Branch, I say give the bastard what he wants and grant him immortality -- the kind of immortality Borusa got at the end of the classic-era Doctor Who episode, "The Five Doctors." Immortality as a statue inside a tomb filled with booby traps, in the middle of The Death Zone.
This was totally the best way to get that climax rolling! Celestia's last line was pure gold as it led me to know that my belief of what was going to happen after they boasted to Twi that Spike would be a dragon skin rug was completely accurate. Magic suppression horn ring obliviated and Mama Bear Twilight charging to the rescue.
Also, YAY! More Scootaloo!
May the Grace of the Valar Protect You
Shire Folk
Twilight almost killed a dragon! They really thought she couldn't handle some ponies.
They are so bucked!
Didn't see the immortality bit coming, but Celestia laughing in Olive Branch's face? Totally called it.
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Really? Luna's own words in chapter 4 of your own story, The Great Alicorn Hunt, say otherwise. She has clearly regarded it as a curse, because up until the beginning of your own story (when you ascended all of the Mane Six), no one else can share it with her, save Celestia, so the both of them have spent thousands of years watching friends and loved ones die, knowing they can't do anything to save them and that they will never see them again.
Now, in your literary universe, they have the potential opportunity to do something about it, so the curse is lessened. Your literary universe, however -- enjoyable as it is -- is not an established canon which everyone is obliged to follow if they feel their stories would be better served another way. Please respect that.
Okay, here we go.
1)
the second comma should have been a colon
2) why does Soarin know who Olive Branch is?
3) Olive's goal is IMMORTALITY??? are you kidding me? that is honestly the biggest and most disappointing motive reveal I've read in a long time. Like at least a few months...hush, I read alot
Welp, guess we'll see who gets fragged once Twi gets back to town...assuming Rarity hasn't given them a titanic smackdown, or that they haven't been Stared into a coma...
Oh man, that was amazing! I really needed that. Awesome chapter!
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I suppose you would find your friends dying, your wife/husband dying, and every single person you will ever meet die ok, right?
I mean, think about this: He demanded inmortality, but that wont make him an alicorn. What makes you think he will have the power to rule? He will be able to try as many times as he pleases, but he will eventually give up.
So that was your master plan Olive Branch? To gain immortality by stepping on a few innocent ponies? And all because you assume Celestia and Luna are unfit to rule? Wow you are the most pathetic being on the planet if you think that you're better then them.
To recap your numerous mistakes you've scared a sweet and innocent filly for what could possibly be life, made life miserable for a select few ponies, harassed countless more, tried to recruit innocent bystanders into your vendetta, destroyed a family by forever driving a wedge between Scootaloo and Speedy Delivery, abducted a Wonderbolt and an Element of Harmony bearer, tied up three more and an innocent pony, threatened the life of a baby dragon, nearly allowed for a bunch of dragons to burn Ponyville to the ground, provoked an angry mother, caused innocent ponies to suffer, angered an immortal, threatened to plunge Equestria into chaos, and that's just the offenses I can name off the top of my head.
You know it'd be funny if it weren't so pathetic. But:
So Olive turns out to be just another plothole after the Princesses power, and roped in a bunch of other plotholes as dupes in his plans. Figures. At least we get to sit back and laugh as Twilight turns the dupes inside out.
Olive branch: still as useful to a story as an anus on an elbow.
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Under the effects of stress, fury or sheer panic, people tend to forego rational thought.
-Mis
Olive Branch is clever, I'll give him that, but he's an idiot to think he could beat Twilight.
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Are you kidding me, I'm calling it now: Princess Celestia is broadcasting the entire damn thing in real time.
She already said she wanted to have a public discussion to show that the protesters were mislead.
static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/evil_standards_crop_1_2518.jpg
I think that makes my point.
That lynch mob that went after Spike is gonna get STOMPED. This Mama Bear shoots FREAKING LASER BEAMS!
Now, let's see what Rainbow does to Speedy.
"So yeah, to convince you to give me immortality I recruited a foal abuser and a bunch of racists who are likely to skin your student's dragon alive. Can I live forever now?"
Go kick some flank, Twilight! MoFo's have it coming. And I can't wait to see what RD does to Speedy. I hope it's violent.
The futile quest for immortality. I always believe that their no such thing as true immortality. Every beginning has an end and if it can live it can die. Luna and Celestia are no different. And I was just starting to respect Olive Branch but he really blew it big time. I hope the puppeteer of that mindless dummy can do better. And it looks like Twilight is on the march and lets hope Rarity and Spike will be able to hold their ground until she gets there. Though this is a good chance for Spike's dragon instincts to kick in to defend himself and Rarity.