- Member Since 14th Apr, 2015
- offline last seen 3 hours ago
CapNTilfy
A lovable goofball who delights in spreading positive vibes and writing stories. =3 (AKA Orangie1984 of Derpibooru!)
CapNTilfy
Joined 14th Apr, 2015 ·
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This was a lot steamier than I expected it to be. But that was a pleasant surprise.
Premise is cute, but the LUS made me lose patience with this about halfway through. "The animal caretaker" is one of the more obnoxious instances of it I've seen in a while
No time to read right now, but that cover image is to good to pass up. Plus there needs to be more SunShyne in the world
9958568
I'm sorry you didn't enjoy this. I'll use this input to improve my writing. Thanks for the feedback at least!
9958583
Here's a good guide specifically on how not to write that. There's examples to help you work through things.
9958643
Sweet. Thanks!
Huh, that's ironic. I was writing LUS because I thought name repetition was frowned upon. I do keep that as moderate as I can.
Sweet! Keep up the good work.
If you had toned down just a little on the repetition of 'the animal caretaker', this story would be perfect.
Good job!
9958872
Yeah, I know. =) I'll keep the whole repetition thing in mind for future stories.
It was at this moment they knew they f-d up.
Oh my gosh! Sunset Shimmer and Fluttershy getting it on in the shower! Talk about a steamy sex scene. Nice.
Gratuitous, sexy, adorable SunShyne. Perfect. X3
Refreshing. 👍
Some tantalising whispers and few descriptions to keep the best results. Nearly perfect (save the repetitions 😉).
I love this ship. The coverart hooked me in.
10701573
If there isn't any evident love or passion in the cover art, I don't see the point of using it for a shipfic.
Awwww