I Love You. I Hate You. I Want To Be You.
Chrysalis stared up at her phone. She didn't feel anything. That was the norm for her. She'd wake up, go about her job from home, stare at her phone and then sleep. A daily ritual with no emotion. Her dark apartment matched her mood as she thumbed through her feed. Dozens of ponies with wide smiles, sunlit backdrops and lives better than any day she'd ever had.
Well... to say she felt absolutely no emotion was perhaps a lie. There was one thing that made her feel. There was one that had caught her eyes a long time ago. Before she was getting thousands of likes a post. A beautiful mare by the screen name of "Candenza". Every photo was filled with the most pure version of what everyone else pretended. A genuine smile, always out doing something. The park, the beach, a restaurant.
It all felt so far away to her. Even just going out, ponies knew exactly what she was. What she was capable of. She was required to wear a ring to prove she wasn't turning into anyone. She was avoided, her family, as was the way of changelings, tossed her aside as soon as they could. Romance was so far out of mind that she didn't even begin to know what that might feel like.
What would it be like to be out looking like anyone else? Not worrying that she'd run into the original or that she'd find someone who knew them. To just go out and get smiles in return. To not worry about the police following her around, making sure she didn't steal anything. To have her own friends?
A part of her knew it was pathetic but some part of her mind considered Cadenza her friend. Even though she never once interacted with any of her posts. Never once interacted with her. But looking at her posts, new and old had become a sort of daily habit. She knew each small detail of every post by heart. Her first post years ago, her budding relationship with a Police Officer, her love of his family. Even tutoring his little sister. Though her posts had made it clear that the young girl had little scholastic that Cadenza could teach her.
She felt her phone buzz. A notification. She only had three things she had them turned on for. Texts, her bank app and when Cadenza posts. A quick glance showed that it was the latter. A quick few skilled movements of her fingers and Cadenza's page was reloaded. She looked at the most recent one. She was engaged. Chrysalis didn't usually feel anything but... now she did. Now she felt... something. She was... angry. Why was she angry? She should be happy for her. She was happy. You're happy for friends right?
Her finger hovered for a moment before tapping the formerly white heart, now turned red. She didn't feel any different. She was still angry. Was it really anger? Why was she even angry? Why did she feel anything while looking at her pictures? Friendship with someone who didn't know you existed. Did she even really feel that? Or did she just convince herself she did so that she didn't feel so lonely?
She sluggishly got up from her bed and walked into the bathroom, phone in hand. She stared at herself in the mirror. The bags under her eyes, her naturally drooping ears, tattered wings and long greasy hair. She looked like shit, even for a changeling and that was saying a lot. No wonder ponies thought she was a criminal or something.
She looked through the pictures again. She stopped on one with the caption "New day, new me!" and stared at it for longer than she cared to keep track of before she raised her hand in the peace pose.
In the next moment a ring of green flames wrapped around her head and traveled down to her feet. She looked at herself. Perky ears, bright, wide eyes, wide beautiful wings and soft bouncy hair.
But there was no light in her eyes. She was a changeling. She could copy the forms of ponies she knew with nigh perfection but she couldn't copy things that weren't physical. The lack of life in her own eyes was reflected in that of her current form. It didn't look natural at all for her.
Chrysalis didn't have any of the things that Cadenza did. The family, friends or lover. The things that gave other ponies lives meaning. What did Chrysalis have? A dark, dank apartment and a job that paid barely enough?
The ring of flames returned as once again the black skinned changeling was standing. She dropped her hand and set her phone down. She could feel... something from deep inside. It was bubbling up and finally she spoke her first words all day.
Well it wasn't really words. She screamed and grabbed at whatever she could reach. Tearing down her shower curtain, stomping through her toilet seat. She breathed heavily and stared at her reflection before another scream escaped her throat as she slammed her forehead into it.
She hated this. She hated everything. Life wasn't supposed to be this. Why was she cast aside, hated for what she was. She growled to herself as she stared at her phone once again, picking it up and ignoring the blood that was falling from her face. She tossed the phone towards, somewhere. She heard it crack and fall against the ground but it didn't matter.
She wasn't going to keep living this way. To Tartarus with everyone and what they thought. Who were they to decide where she was allowed to be at what hours. She was going to live. As free and open as everyone else! To feel something other than anger and hate. To finally enjoy life. Even if it was someone else's.
She grabbed her jacket and threw it on as she stomped her way out of her apartment, not even bothering to close the door. It didn't matter. If this failed then there was no future anyway. None that she wanted to live to see at least.
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Chrysi as phone stalker. Least it doesn’t go to Bjork levels.
10081045
She's uhh. Kinda going out to steal her life. At least that's the implication.
10081048
The Bjork guy was convinced that it was true love and sent a mailbomb intending to drink poison so that they would have a lovers suicide.
10081054
Ah. True enough. You win.
10081054
He sounds like a Bjerk; who would do that?
I can.........actually sympathize with Chrysalis on this. (Sort of.)
Good story. Get's a like from me.
I absolutely love this. Are there any plans for a sequel or are you going to keep this as a one-shot?
I hope there is a squeal
10081689
I mean. I'm sure Cady will squeal when she finds Chrysalis in her bedroom.
10081665
In all seriousness I've been thinking about it.
10081608
Yeah. It's a more human sort of situation.
As someone who hasn't posted in social media in years and accepted the human conditions I gotta say, I can actually sympathize this
10081740
Pretty much.
Ngl I'd love a sequel to this lol
10081843
Honestly I've been thinking of it but not sure how much I can do.
10081846
Maybe have her make a fake account? And cadence discovers it? Or have a clone of the royal wedding but it's just with her daily life?
10081847
Nah. I didn't want to do step two sorta sequel. If I was to do one I'd rather do one after she fails from Cadence's perspective
This thing you have wrought.
Well done, well done.
10081873
X3 ty, ty
10081884
You are most welcome
10081872
Ok still good lol
Man, this is brutally depressing.
10082276
Yup. Supposed to explain why she would go off such a deep end.
10082276
Chrysalis is basically a Doomer lol
Damn, I'm not big fan of Chrysalis but this makes me feel kinda bad for her. kinda wish I could find more stories along the lines of this one.
10082527
Eh. Kinda. Not fully. It's just her life.
10082556
Glad you felt that way. Means I did something right.
I admit, it's the fic pic that caught my attention, its beautiful.
And this fic did not disappoint.
It handled this all so well in such a short space, making Chrysalis feel so relatable even if she's living a more extreme problem than most--I loved that you still had aspects of her being a changeling, and having to wear a special ring so people could almost trust her.
The ending doesn't sound like its leading anywhere good... maybe she'll become friends with Cadence? That'd be nice.
Unlikely, but nice.
Great one-shot!
Is the completion tag correct, or do you plan to write more? I’m interested to see how our favorite little parasite takes control.
10082580
Yeah. That pic is what catches most people. It's what caught my eye and made me write this so I totally understand XD.
Yeah, I kinda had the idea that in a society like what is briefly shown through the picture, hiding isn't a thing anymore. Everyone knows what the changelings are. What they do. How to identify them. There are no more queens, no more hives. They keep to themselves and get rid of family as soon as possible. Wouldn't want anyone thinking they were trying to create a hive right?
and yeah. Nothing good.
10082589
It is but I might write a thing from Cadence's point of view after she fails. I have no plans to do a full story though. If I do I'll stick it to this one. No reason to separate them.
But that's if I DO write it, which is a maybe.
Wow, you ain't kidding when this was a drama! This was quite a powerful slice of life fic here and I loved it! It was just so passionate in how it was written and how Chrysalis's emotions were conveyed! This was pure enjoyment right here! Hope ya didn't mind, but I made a little reading on it! It was too good to pass up on!
Audio Lornker!: https://youtu.be/jnnAJCyjxu4
(I don't mean to offend anyone with this comment!)
10082708
Eeeeey. Thank ya much for enjoying it ^~^
and the reading of course!
Very relatable. Well done!
10083049
Thank you, thank you.
10082596
This is too promising to leave like this.
10081054
Sounds like someone who wanted a "Romeo and Juliet romance" and then somehow kept wanting it after they actually saw the play. (It's not kinkshaming when the other party is both unwilling and a real person)
10083456
Yeah I can honestly say I’ve never understood why Romeo and Juliet is seen as anything other than a tragedy of hormones and bad impulse decisions.
10083481
Again, it's seen as that by anyone who actually saw it. That's just a tiny minority who's annoyed by how pop culture has remembered it but forgotten the point.
The source tweet got deleted, any other way to see it or can you tell me what it was.
11194160
https://twitter.com/dotoriii_
That's the artist. They're pretty dang solid. But the source was pretty much just the picture I used for the story.
Wow, lotsa baggage there.
11310219
Yeah. I can't believe how into it I went on this story. Inspiration hit me like a semi with that pic, like damn.