• Member Since 24th Dec, 2011
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

Bandy


Everyone's* Favorite Author | Iced Ko-Fi, scalding glances

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On the day that Astral Sign got his cutie mark, a meteor fell from space and struck his home. The next day, his parents filed for divorce.

The events were not unrelated.


My attempt at imitating the style of the incomparable GaPJaxie. Much love buddy :)

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Comments ( 7 )

An attempt to write in the style of GaPJaxie

On the day that Astral Sign got his cutie mark, a meteor fell from space and struck his home. It vaporized everything, leaving a neat, smoldering ruin where his house used to be. The residences on either side of his were untouched.

The next day, his parents filed for divorce.

Wow. Wow. This is an unpleasant moment of self-reflection. :pinkiecrazy:

Seriously, I think you nailed my style, particularly in the hook. It felt familiar, and more than that, I enjoyed it. The characterization was effective, the language succinct, the prose light and airy. It's a nice little tale you've crafted!

If Twilight can levitate an Ursa, couldn't one of the princesses move the house? Heck, people do that in our world, and we don't have magic, earth ponies, or sometimes helpful dragons the size of skyscrapers.

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