Noteworthy gets a phone call early in the morning.
The story is complete and five chapters long. One chapter will be posted a day until complete.
Preread by The Sleepless Beholder and LuckyChaosHooves
Open for Art Commissions. I write gay romantic comedies with ponies now. Get off my back, MOM.
Noteworthy gets a phone call early in the morning.
The story is complete and five chapters long. One chapter will be posted a day until complete.
Preread by The Sleepless Beholder and LuckyChaosHooves
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I liked the substance of it, but I felt everything came by too fast? The mad music, the phone ringing even when smashed, the urge to follow the chorus, even the horrid description of the orchestra when Noteworthy finally comes in... I want to fave this, yet I feel so much potential discarded here. All the elements for an horror story are here, even what you tried to convey could be potent, but it's not executed as well as it could be. Was there a word or time restriction? I've enjoyed other works you've put out, so it's clearly not a lack of skill or anything. In any case, I did have a lot of appreciation for the substance, just felt it went by too fast and was too tell-y.
indeed an ironic name for a background pony…
aww, i do this too!
good use of a character detail here
yeah that is uh, certainly cryptic! glad i don’t read descriptions so i don’t even know what genre tag this is supposed to have
ooh, definitely intrigued by where this is going
well if i were Noteworthy i would take that as a sign to move far, far away right now
i feel like the ponies wouldn’t find this pony racism to be funny but i guess “no good horner” hits differently to me as a human
oof, even when suspecting Apple Seed of murder Crisp is kinda helping them get away with it
oh no, Big Mac was the stoic, laconic old farmer whose advice should have been listened to by the horror protagonist! he really does fit well in that role
what a magical realism horror of a mental image
ooh, that is good! well-laid by the lines from the previous chapters, and a resolution to the incongruence of a background pony named “Noteworthy” being a bartender of some sort for a living.
so this really was two horror stories running in parallel: a family curse brought upon the farm by a racist Apple ancestor and it claiming Noteworthy as a victim in the present day. and i’m guessing the last chapter will be what brings the two together!
so many questions! love it tho
oh this is brilliant! love Granny Smith not bothering to get Sugar Belle’s name right, both for that being Granny Smith doing Granny Smith things as well as underscoring how who Sugar Belle is doesn’t matter. but also! completely recasts that canon romance from its surface-level schmaltz to a continuation of a family curse out of horrific obligation.
and i don’t know if you intended this, but i am definitely reading this with my idea of Big Mac being bi in mind, again adding to the things mentioned above. Big Mac, Granny Smith, and Sweet Apple Acres really hold these horror tropes well. great stuff!
I don't know why, but the concept is really creepy.Maybe because I had some experiences in the past with creepy phonecalls, but I can't wait to read how the story develops.
Oh God, I don't know why, but "no good horner" sounds so funny to me
Also, it seems that the beginning of the chapters are implying murder, but I wonder if that's the case or thwre will be a twist...