A new broney whos a fan of discord
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In a world with normal, everyday ponies, chaos is breaking out as more and more ponies are mutated into chimeras. Twilight Sparkle, a scientist and college student, and her new college friends gather together, becoming superheroes, while also trying to find a cure and stop whoever is mutating ponies. Meanwhile, one of her friends, Fluttershy, befriends a gangster, not knowing his part in all of this...
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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cool keep up the good work
11672436
thank you
Listing? What are we listing? Certainly not listening to anything... got no text to speech.
Also... when does the sentence plan to end?
... this is more of an odd thing than a thing to be fixed but why are the ponies wearing clothes like humans?
Who is this Mrs. Kang? And why are we trying to overhear her? Is she not... over here?
(I do like how the comics hanged several lampshades over the first and last name of Mayor Mare)
Oh, dear... how much older did they get?
The whole chapter gets progressively worse pasts that point...
11682707
I have an editor now and am currently fixing said issue.
Before I read this, I must know: By “chimera” do you mean a classic chimera from Greek mythology of is it more like a draconequus?
11708352
Chimera in this means a combination of one or more creature...
Discord is a chimera... a unicorn is a chimera... a bat pony is a chimera.
11708352
I see you reading all my stuff and would like to thank you for that by the way. So thanks hope you enjoy the story.
How can Fluttershy be at two places at the same time? did I miss something? She's with Mr Ghost and at the Fight
11717333
Oh shoot thats a editing mistake it's supposed to be dash going to fix right now.
Edit...
Ok fixed it... See originaly had her join the fight and changed it. So she was with Mr ghost the entire time... Good catch thank you so much
This is honestly really great read and an interesting concept. Can't wait to watch that audio drama you're creating.
11721571
Oh thank you so much... I'm struggling to find voice actors but it's coming once I do
11721573
Can't wait to see it
FEELINGS!!!
11736790
Thank you for the comment, I hope it was good.
*Celestia
so ive made some changes to the pro log chapter 1 and chapter 2 nothing much just trying to stream line the story
11761126
thank you, so I have an editor now and am currently fixing said issue, but you might want to atleast read the prologe again, i took a scene from chapter one and aded it to the prologe, making it stream line alot bettter.
11761126
fixed
11761502
Gotcha
Well, that came out of nowhere.
11762560
yeah, one more twist for this story.
congratulations then. I'll look forward your next story.
11783863
if have any criticism on this tale I would like to hear them but thank you for reading
11783950
weellll, if you insist. :-) I think it's more of an editing issue than a story criticism.
one thing I saw was, be careful of missing words. like:
I think it should've been:
'As well as we'll ever be." Smolder replied.
or
'As well as I'll ever be." Smolder replied.
I'm sure that when you read it in your head. It sounded correct. But it never was actually typed. (I know that happens a lot to me. I've actually edited this reply a dozen times and I'm sure I still screwed something up)
11783972
yeah id call that an editing problem but i do understand it
OH MY GOD
I NEED THIS STORY INJECTED INTO MY VEINS I NEED THIS TATTOOED INTO MY SKULL
HOW CRUEL OF YOU TO LEAVE US ON A CLIFFHANGER DEAR AUTHOR!!!!!
OK but seriously this story had me running around my house squealing in excitement and inadvertently scaring my family members with the screaming haha
It
is
so
absolutely
GOOD
like the plot???? oh my god
at first I thought it was kinda predictable but oh how you proved me wrong, and I'm so absolutely delighted you did
I have no idea where this is going, I thought I had but then suddenly CHANGELINGS??? I'm absolutely ready for the ride this story will take me on
Holding my heart steady for the sequel!!
LITERALLY IM SHAKING FROM THE HAPPINESS FROM READING AND GRIEF THAT I CAN'T BINGE READ ON WHAT HAPPENED NEXT
You can't imagine how excited I was when all the points of the story connected and started showing the clear picture!
Though it was kind of rushed at the end but rushed stories are a guilty pleasure of mine so I'm biased by how much I like it
Seriously very few stories get me so upbeat and this story is now in the top of my list
While yes there were many many confusing grammatical and structural issues in the story
From an honest reader point of view, the story at times was very hard to read but the bare bones of the story kept me engaged to the end (plus my years of reading foreign online novels through google translate kind of make me an expert at understanding what the author is trying to say despite the language issues) but I can see it not being the same for others tho
For such a good plot the multiple errors in language dull its charm unfortunately
This really could be even better if u had someone good at English as a beta reader
[I volunteer myself if u wish]
It can be something more amazing if the English was fixed up more
still
oh my god!!!!
your brain!!!
I worship it.
Please don't give up on this story!!
I was absolutely astonished when I saw this fic not having insane popularity and comments and I knew I had to say something!!!
I'm new to this website like very new so I don't know much but I knew I needed to make an account now and give my admiration to you
At first I was only here for just fluttercord but this story instead captured my heart
I love how third dimensional this story felt with the detailed backstory
though yes other than twilight, fluttershy, discord and tempest rarely any other characters felt relevant other than just being there
but I'm a bit biased towards my favorite characters
and ooh!!!
how u characterized discord
showing off his smartness and not just making him a silly spontaneous character like mostly stories do
(well, he is but u made him so much more than that)
my heart bled for him and all that he's been through
I love how the fluttercord wasn't very fast or slow but very natural in itself
I wish fluttershy told him about her being pregnant I'm sure he would be out of this world happy to know that after all his suffering he now will have the happy family he always wanted with the mare he loves but I guess leaving that unknown gives us readers the enthusiasm to wait for the next part
but dear god any deity out there i really hope he didn't die this time
Also the time traveling kids really was a good plot point though I wish we got to know more about them, they barely did anything here. Kids please save your dad so you guys aren't born fatherless a second time *pray* oh dear god this just made think about how heartbroken fluttershy must have been in the previous timeline when he dies and she had to raise their children by herself, oh that poor dear
CELESTIA???? CRYSALLISS??? YOU DROPPED AN ABSOLUTE BOMB ON ME WITH THEIR INVOLVEMENT WHAT WHERE HOW WHEN *monkey noises*
huge respect for how u showed enough of your cards in the story to keep us guessing but then kept surprising us again and again with the conclusions, can't wait to see how you'll continue this
here's all my love and appreciation and patience for when the next part comes out!!
11807335
I read this I think 5 times. I'm so happy you liked it that much and are excited for the future, I am still working on both the audio drama and the sequel will be quite insane. I have also taken this story and de- pony it, turning it into a real book that i and my friend plan to release soon, so if you love the story know there is a non-pony version on the horizon. this has to be the best comment I have ever received and it makes me want to do so much more. Because of its length, I find no one willing to help me edit it, and those who do just don't get my vision since they haven't read it. The thing is I'm so busy these days, that I have no time to correct it. if you would like and if you really would like to help with Gramer the one thing that is the bane of my existence then find me in the MLP fin fic discord, I'd love to to let you do it. my discord name is the same as my fic fic name. By the way oh you have no idea || how much pain I plan to put Fluttershy through|| I'm glad you liked the fluttercord, I did put in a real effort not to rush that or make it cringy. I think I pulled it off. anyway thank you again, and look forward to Heart of the Chimera, coming hopefully soon.
This chapter holds a very romantic loss scene at the end of it very romantic.
11810921
Thank you
11811073
You're welcome.
I read the last chapter, and I found the fact that Discord sacrificed themselves. Sad, if Twilight perfects time travel. I hope she at least changes the past to save him because Discord and Fluttershy deserve to have a future together.
you know a story is good whe the Checkov's gun is actually an ICBM everyone sees a mile away and they stil cheer at the mushroom cloud
11811797
lol thank you
11811649
You’ll just have to wait and find out in the sequel. Chapter 1 is up now.
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