The Celestial John Advice
Twilight Gets a Puppy
Season 7
By TDR
The Celestial John Advice
[Ponyville]
The Sparkles, Princess Luna and Starlight Glimmer trot through the streets of Ponyville.
The scream was enough to attract attention and start bets. Though at the sight of the first part of the group walking through town was enough to make most residents wary, add in Princess Luna and there were a few of them running for the hills and the rest would be seeking shelter to see if this was something to bet on. With Starlight Glimmer being dragged along as well, most of the streets were clear but a few ponies still in cover, who had bets riding on the outcome of this were still around. After all, none of Rahs' suitors or the Crusaders were around, so the blast yield should be survivable.
The few Guards patrolling the streets had upped their magic armors power or cast a few shield spells if they had the ability and pointed the group to where the scream had gone and moved to protect the stubborn and those with a gambling addiction bigger than their survival instinct.
The path lead, to no ones surprise, Carousel Boutique's main store.
“Well we know she didn't freak out a rude customer, because the noise came to the shop instead of away from.” Twilight hummed.
“Ruff.” Rahs pointed out sniffing the air.
“Ozone?” Princess Luna questioned.
“Rainbow Dash.” Spike pointed out sagely.
“I thought Rainbow Dash was in Canterlot with Prince this weekend.” Twilight hummed to herself as they came up on the front door of the shop. A door that had been smashed off it's hinges and had a very disgruntled looking, IE normal looking, Sombra working to put it back up.
The dark furred pony stopped working on the door as the group approached.
“Sparkles.” Sombra greeted.
“Sombra.” Twilight returned as Spike offered a wave.
“Luna.” Sombra nodded to his mother.
“Sombra.” Luna smiled a little.
“Extra.” Sombra offered glancing to Starlight.
“Somb... Hey wait!” Starlight huffed. ”My Name is Starlight Glimmer!”
“I cannot pretend to care.” Sombra continued. ”The problem is in the main room. Oh and Rainbow Dash and Rarity are there too.”
A spool of thread shot out of the store and belted Sombra upside the head.
“That's for biting Fluttershy!” Pinkie Pie yelled from inside.
“Pinkie do not throw my materials!” Rarity chided.
Sombra sighed and moved out of the way of the group as Rahs scooped up the spool of thread offering the unicorn a nod before they all strode in and Rahs tossed the spool back to Rarity who snatched it out of the air with a shadow tendril.
“Thank you dear. I shouldn't be surprised that you all showed up after that scream.” Rarity sighed setting the spool down on a small table near a dress manikin she had been working on. To her left was Pinkie Pie who was poking a large pile of assorted cloth that Rainbow Dash sat on hyperventilating into a paper bag.
“So what happened? Did something finally decide to attack? Seshat didn't say anything so it's not a table problem.” Twilight questioned.
Rarity, completely non pulsed pointed a hoof at Rainbow Dash with a flat expression as she went back to her work.
Rainbow Dash for the most part looked quite frazzled even for her. She pulled the bag away from her mouth gasping out.
“Prince proposed.”
This was met with a squee from Pinkie Pie, a dead pan look from Rarity, and a look of confusion from everyone else.
“Is .. isn't that a good thing?” Starlight asked ”Why does she look like someone died?”
“It's a Rainbow Dash thing.” Rarity sighed. “You should have been here for her freak out when he asked her out the first time.”
“Did she break the door then too?” Sombra growled from the entrance stomping back after rehanging the door.
“Yes, yes she did.” Rarity sighed. ”That's one of the reasons I have break away hinges on the doors.”
Spike and Rahs both shared a look and then gasped as loudly as they could darting up to Rainbow Dash with big smiles on their face.
“Does this mean we finally get a mommy!?” Spike childishly demanded.
Rainbow Dash stared as Twilight sighed, her magic grabbing both her brothers up as Rarity opened the front door letting Twilight fling the giggling idiots out into the street before she slammed the door on them.
“That has not gotten old for them yet?” Luna asked.
“It's a running gag.” Pinkie Pie offered.
“Alright what happened?” Twilight questioned Rainbow Dash.
“Right so we had date and we talked about going to the Running of the Cows this year and then we were getting a bit.... yeah not talking about that, when he popped up and proposed to me on balcony....”
There was grinding of teeth, but everyone ignored Rarity.
“And then you panicked and flew all the way from Canterlot to Ponyville.” Twilight finished.
“Um... yeah.” Rainbow Dash admitted. ”It's probably a record....”
“Really? Why?” Starlight questioned. “Sounds like you're into this stallion.”
“Cause I'm a hero and sorta a Wonderbolt, everyone knows you get married get fat and have a bunch of kids and your life advancement just stops.” Rainbow Dash blurted.
“Excuse you?” Princess Luna, mother of two, demanded.
“Rainbow. Are you basing this info on perhaps your own parents and maybe Mrs Cake?” Twilight sighed.
“And Fluttershy's parents.” Rainbow Dash pointed out.
“Having met Fluttershy's mom, that pony could use some more body fat.” Pinkie Pie sighed. “And Mrs Cake can bench press 450 and has beaten Big Mac in at least three local Hoof Wrestling tournies.”
“Uhhh.” Rainbow Dash blue screened.
“Also my moms not fat. Clearly your sample size for that hypothesis is skewed.” Twilight states.” Granted there are outliers for that too, I mean Starlight doesn't have any kids and she eats at least three times her weight in food a day.”
“HEY!” Starlight demanded.
“What? You're not fat from that, that's why you're an outlier. And it's weird, I've seen what you eat, I'm a goddess and I can't eat all that?” Twilight rolled her eyes.
“My mother may have put on some weight, but she is … far from inactive....... she is far too active to be honest.” Rarity chimed in.
“I am not getting involved in this.” Sombra stated and quickly retreated to his room.
“You are teaching him well.” Luna muttered to Rarity who tittered.
“Hold on. Hold on.” Starlight chimed up. “So he proposed and you just … ran away? What the heck is he gonna think about that?”
“Probably that she'll accept.” Luna commented getting a look from Starlight. “This is not the first time she's fled like this after all.”
[ Canterlot ]
Prince stood back up from where he knelt to propose. He had gotten Rainbow Dash an earring design engagement ring like the one her mother had. One that wouldn't interfere with her flying like a bracelet or wing clip would.
Prince's mother refused to let him reforge her horn ring, but that was fine, if they had any foals they might want to use it. His mother probably would mellow out for grand foals.
He tilted his head looking up at the rainbow trail of light arcing towards Ponyville and smirked slightly.
He glanced back as he heard hoof steps to note his father was trotting up to look into the sky as well.
“Proposed did you?” his father questioned.
“I did.” Prince nodded.
“Went well then?” his father asked.
“As expected really.” Prince smiled. “ I should be used to this.”
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I thought I just got blue screened too. Never occur to me that Big Mac could lost on strength to anypony in Ponyville, especially a mare.
/snerk
I actually thought that she ended up finding out she was pregnant?
Yep, Bluey has Dashie's number
I wouldnt have put Princes dad as a Muppet.
Also, I didnt get to the second line before I was looking for a Bunker to try and hide in.
11842350
no, that will probably be next chapter, knowing the Bunny...
Doesn’t she remember who Scoots’s mom is? I thought she was finally told.
Mother of two?
11842440
some stallion long time ago, died of old age, and the kid was killed by forgescale.
11842452
Oh yeah, the hooper(sp?) sea/lake part they said was from her tears. My bad
11842456
11842456
Wrong Fic but yeah close
She had a kid a long time ago and he was killed by Forgescale. the second is Sombra.
11842452
yup
11842330
Now as a Nox- Cal, no, when he was still an Earth pony yes. Mrs Cake may look short and chubby but She is also on the 'do not mess with' list of the thieves guild for a reason.
At least Prince knew to expect this!
Silly Rainbow, there is no escaping destiny for you.
11842510
So she is in the sumo/farmer build class then.
So it's still funny
Hmmm, you know last time she did this was when Prince's asked her ouooohh... I see what's going on
Ah there it is
As is throwing stuff at Sombra
Oh relax Rarity, I'm sure Sombra will propose sooner or later
But where's the fun in getting used to things
It's good Prince knows Dash well enough to expect this sort of thing on a 'yes'
Is it just me, or are people commenting less on the popular stories? It used to be there'd be at least a whole page after 12 hours
I still see that sort of thing on the oneshots, so there can't just be --less commenters--
11842613
it's a combanation of having less to say that has not already been said in eariler chapters/stories, and the current chapters being slice of life type singles.
Awesome chapter, funny that Rainbow Dash is the most romantic activ and successful pony of the main six.
Also unlike the others she isn't changed, she is still fully mortal and a pony without extras. The Batman of the Justice League so to speak. In respect of being the most normal individual.
11842627
Not exactly on the former end (Pinkie and Fluttershy have a pretty good relationship with each other) , though I can see where you would make that observation. Though, in the cases of Spike and Apple Bloom, they kind of have the excuse of only being in their mid-to-late-teens at present. And Applejack is still competing with five other gals, so your point there still applies. , but I see your point concerning the latter end.
11842601
All quite well said.
Oh relax Rarity, I'm sure Sombra will propose sooner or later
Yeah, but will it be before or after Mac finally proposes to Twi? :-D
On the upside, at least Twi doesn't have to worry about competition from Sugar Belle in THIS universe.
11842683
Oh. Oh you just HAD to jinx it.
11842717
Nope it's matter of fact, but even if, both are ageless, Sugar Belle is a normal mortal. I doubt Big Mac needs more than one mare, Sugar Belle has nothing to over Twilight can do for him.
Besides, this story is very far away from canon main story and Big Mac isn't a simpel farmer stallion anymore. Sugar Belle is at best a fun concubine with a lot of effort, nothing more.
Personally I made the Apple clan quite remember worth as well. Or rather Apple-Pear clan
👍
11842613
There are less amazing stories with more comments, while equally good as this stories are nearly devoid if chapter. It just simply is that way.
My own stories are liked, but bearly commented on
It just that way for the moment.
Though some readers are all the more fun to read about.
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All 'Hiver' stories are steamroller either entertaining comments, especially after the third sequel of his original work.
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Don't worry, I am aware of some of the constraints of this AU. It was more in jest because one of the rules does seem to be if someone open their mouth, trouble happens.
It's all in good fun ^^
Ah, the Gentleman John Marcone school of thought. I approve.
Still one of my favorite little jokes from The Dresden Files. The casual reveal that the local mob kingpin has learned some lessons about operating in the same city as an irate at the best of times wizard with a flair for theatrics.
All the tactical entrance to his establishments have the expected solid, high security doors and locks. All the dramatic entrances have cheap doors made out of material unlikely to create any dangerous shrapnel when Dresden decides he wants to make an entrance.
Also, this chapter made me wonder how long it took before the Ponyville Betting Agency made a rule preventing ponies from betting on their own survival. It's a bet you never have to worry about paying out on if you lose.
11842778
I just noticed the comic page I send Februar 1 in the comment section is basically this chapter in regards to Rainbow Dash... priceless.
Indeed, though it might be fun to see Sugar Belle try and fail, maybe Twilight actually gets jealous enough to seriously compete with Sugar for Big Mac attention.
11842510
I'd have thought Pinkie Pie was the reason for their being on the 'do not touch' list, since she stays in the building. I figured it would take a Pie to beat Bic Mac.
I love how this version of Blueblood just casually accepts that this is fully the reaction he expected from Rainbow Dash to him proposing. Though to be fair, he probably already figured she booked it back to her friends, who are gonna help her figure out that she does in fact want to marry him while also making her realize that just because she'll have kids eventually doesn't mean her life will be over once she does.
Hard to keep track of all the lore lol
11843109
I'm writing this and I have trouble keeping track of it.
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Happens when multiple stories are being written.
I have a huge all chapter edit to listen to when I re-start writing chapters. Because the more between stories is differently written and needs consistent back checking.
But good stories are always worth a re-reading anyway:
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I can see Rarity checking her inventory and going I need to order more hinges.
I can also see the tax pony questioning why Rarity has written off so much in door repairs especially hinges, then again its Ponyville they might wonder why she isn't writing off more.
11842510
So you are telling me that the guild has listed individuals not just ponyvale as a whole?
I am confused what I commented that got deleted
I wonder what games gods come up with to keep one another entertained:
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11846111
Both
What fun awaits us next?
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Maybe another chapter where the nearly useless Griffon god gets his feathers plucked by the returned hero?
Hm... Wonder if we can ship Celestia with that badass Griffon Hero
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I wonder what Fluttershy is up to with Pinkie these days:
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Only for RD noping out of it...
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Hope we get:
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Is Celestia and other Alicorns able to pull a signature move?
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Making big army warfare unpractical.
Canterlot nobels trying to pull something next time around:
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So how about some more poisen joke action?
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Could be fun...
Or unexpected things to happen:
Wonder what Spike and Twilight will be up to in the future. Some more sibling moments would be nice:
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Maybe even some royal sister moments? They have been great in this story line ♡
Or some fun with the Changelings:
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I wonder how the Equestrian alphabet looks like, I personally imagen something alongside this in writing:
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