Night has fallen. The snow, recently melted, has made the cold ground damp. A fierce wind blows in from the West, rattling the skeletal trees, devoid of their leaves.
You stand, alone, at the corner of your driveway. The moon, occasionally obfuscated by the passing cloud or two, shines pale, radiant light down on the neighbourhood. The crackle of your lit cigarette mixes in with the gusts of wind ripping across the yard, sending various detritus tumbling. You shudder, the thick warmth of the heavy leather jacket across your torso just barely managing to keep most of the chill out.
Out of the corner of your eye, you see movement. Your head snaps to the right, focused on a particular spot across the street. You think you see it again – just a brief glimpse, a flash, a hush of something colourful.
“What the hell...?” you muse aloud, scratching your head. You lean back against the wooden retaining wall on the opposite side of the driveway, keeping your eyes trained on the general area. You narrow your eyes, really concentrating - ...nothing. Nothing but the rustle of the trees and the howl of the wind. You shrug.
You take another puff of your cigarette, the dull burn filling your lungs for the umpteenth time that day. You think to yourself that you should really quit; it's quite a nasty habit, not to mention expensive to boot.
Something jars you out of your self-imposed mental guilt-trip.
You can't quite put your thumb on it at first; it's almost like a nagging sensation at the base of your spine, a sort of twitch that instinctively alerts a person when they're being watched. Slowly, you turn your head -
-nothing. Again, nothing.
Sighing in relief, you turn your head back towards the driveway. You lift your hand to your mouth, about to take a sip of your favourite soda.
“Hi!” The pink pony chirps happily, somehow floating in mid-air above your head.
It certainly has potential. I will follow this to see where it leads. It's been a while since I've read something from the second-person point of view.
i have 5 bags filled with stars, you can have them all!! also, SECOND
TOO SHORT
Me: Stay back demon!
Makes sign of the cross and starts muttering in latin.
Pinkie:Don't be such a silly filly, you need a part, and a hug.
Pinkie jumps on me.
ME:Nooooo!!!, I don't want to be turned into suger fillled treats.
Pinkie:What?
Confused, pinkie releases her grip on me, I run inside my house, grab my crossbow and a knife nd use the crossbow to launch a knife at her.
....
Good day.
Reading this from "my" point of view is going to be fun. I'm keeping an eye on this story good sir.
I wish it was longer though.
When I read second person "you" stories and can't identify with the character, I feel like I live an extraordinary life. Maybe I do!
I like the Idea. I'd definatly like to see where you go with this
Tracking, I'll rate later.
Some other dude wrote a Pinkie on Earth story. Do you know what happened to it? DO YOU? I'm not sure either.
It was about some dude at school, who sees pinkie there, and threatens a group of people with a knife to get them all away from her, and he goes home, and he tells his parents, and the chapter ended with the sentence "Mom, dad, this is Pinkamina Diane Pie" or something like that.
Does anyone know what happened to it, or what it's called? I could have sworn I tracked it.
i like the whole 'you' thing, but it distracts me too much and makes me want to actually look left and right and stuff of that nature. this would be awesome though if it was read aloud!!!
Despite it being second person fic, this is surprisingly readable, and I wouldn't mind seeing where it goes.
I read this, then looked at picture, not really gotten that paranoid looking at pinkie pie before, this looks to be a promising read
'My' point of view? But i don't smoke! Or drink soda!
5 Stars!
Has potential, as well as making me want to read MOAR. I hope pinkie doesn't get all :P
Haven't read many second person stories, so not much to compare this too.
This is what happens when Pinkie uses math and breaks the fourth wall at the same time.
dont really like my point of view.i dont smoke.and i dont like to cuss(youtube's fault).but ill give it a try.